Hello... Um, do you remember me? Yep, the author that has left you hanging for almost 3 months. I'm sooooooooo ssorry! It's just that I've been uber busy with this inconvinient school malarkey! I actually wrote this chapter about a week ago but I have only just got round to publishing it. You see I shouldn't really be on my laptop as I have been banned for a week whilst I do some exams at school (apparently I get too disrupted by social networking sites, Dammit Tumblr).Anyway, so then I decided I would have to post it from one of the school library computers, but... I have been banned from the Library until further notice for handing a few books in 23 weeks late (so not my fault, well maybe a little).

Anyway, that's all with my measley excuses. Hope you enjoy...

Dissclaimer: I own nothing (except Phoebe and a shoebox).

"Songbird! Welcome to Chemistry class..." Kelly pulled open the door to reveal a massive classroom full of girls of various ages running around in lab coats and science glasses, poking and prodding various unconfined, fairly lethal looking experiments whilst having a natter across the classroom.
The older girl sauntered into the room like she owned the place, Phoebe noticed she had an air of swagger about her which only caused the younger students to respect her even more. Walking in her wake Phoebe felt very insignificant and small (even though she was only an inch or so shorter). Soon she realised that the head girl was leading her over to the equipment and had picked up two pairs of glasses and two lab coats on her way.
Throwing a some glasses and one of the said lab coats at her Kelly proceeded to explain the ins and outs of the class.
"Right, Songbird this is Chemistry class. It's the only compulsory class at St. Trinians and must be attended at least three times a week. When you start you are given a set assignment and it must be completed correctly before you can start creating your own chemical compounds or whatever it is the first years do when i'm not looking. The assignment is usually fairly simple, but, depending on previous chemistry grades it can be anything from making a smoke bomb to brewing vodka, although I would appreciate if you kept that one to your self. Now, the teacher for this class is Piper Myles, she's nice but completely bat sh*t crazy. If you go through that door over there you'll be in her office, then, ask her for 'The Newbie 5' assignment and she'll give you some paper sheets and a list of equipment. Once you've done that meet me here, you got that songbird?" Kelly finished the explanation but raising a manicured eyebrow.
"Yes Ma'am!" The younger girl gave a mock salute and headed off in the direction of the door Kelly had pointed out.
Phoebe knocked sharply on the door and heard a muffled 'come in'. She pushed open the door a little before stepping in hastily.
"Hello, um... I'm Phoebe. Kelly told me I had to come get a 'newbie assignment five'?"
"Oh, right yeah sure. So you any good at chemistry death chick?"
"Um, Phoebe's fine. And no... I'm not great..." In truth Phoebe was awful at Chemistry. She used to help Abby in the forensic lab sometimes but it would almost always end in something exploding or being spilt. So no, she was not good at Chemistry, not by a long shot.
"Well, we'll soon fix that death chick." Piper bent down to retrieve some papers from a pile at her feet. The woman was about 30 years old and didn't seem overly crazy at all. She did however seem rather on the large size. She passed Phoebe some sheets before sitting down at her desk again.
"Goodbye death chick. Have a good lesson."
"I will, thank you miss Myles." Phoebe collected the papers and headed for the door, but, as she was about to leave she heard the teacher behind her break wind rather loudly…

Phoebe was looking through all the equipment trying to find all the items on the bizarre list when someone tapped her on the shoulder causing her to drop the beaker.
'Jesus Jones… Don't scare me like that!' Phoebe exclaimed.
'Alright Birdsong, keep your hair on. What's got you so spooked anyway? I was only gone 5 minutes and suddenly you're jumping out of you skin at the slightest thing.'
'It's nothing, Piper just gives me the creeps, that's all.' It was the truth, Piper did give her the creeps, but, only because she looked like a certain species of Raxacoricofallapatorian.
'So anyway Songbird, what I really wanted to know is what experiment you've got?'
'Well Jones, what do you know about distilling vodka?'

Phoebe wasn't good at Chemistry at the best of times, so, trying to distill Vodka with a mocking head girl peering over her shoulder declaring that she is doing it wrong every five minutes is very distracting.
'Wow, Songbird. You really are bad at Chemistry, aren't you.'
'Yes, I'm well aware of that thank you!' Both girls were surrounded by various spilt substances and broken glassware and so far they had made near to no head way. Phoebe started reading the instructions through again.

'Okay. Step one: Vodka is a distilled, highly refined product. It is usually distilled with a column (reflux) still, but pot stills can also be used. Column stills produce purer alcohol because they essentially redistill the alcohol in a single pass, and therefore further purification with a carbon filter (activated carbon) may not be needed. The distilled vodka can be redistilled additional times to produce a very pure product. Pot stills produce a crude product that contains flavor and aroma compounds that will need to be removed by treatment with a carbon filter and/or by additional distillations.
Step two: Choose the medium to be fermented and distilled. Vodka is commonly made from wheat, rye, barley, corn, and potatoes. Sugar and molasses can also be used alone or added to other ingredients. Rogue distilling makes an innovative vodka from Pinot Noir red wine. Whatever you choose, it must be (or have been) fermented by yeast so that alcohol is ultimately produced. When making vodka from grains and potatoes, a mash must be made that contains active enzymes that break down the starches from the grains or potatoes and makes fermentable sugars. Fruit juice already contains sugars so starch-degrading enzymes are not needed. As with fruit juice, vodka made from store-bought sugars need only be fermented, thus bypassing the need for a mash. When already fermented mediums such as wine are used, the medium can be distilled right away into vodka.
Kelly… How the hell am I meant to decipher this?"
Kelly just stood there laughing and not trying to help in any shape or form.
"Jones, help me here please! It's just my luck that I will almost definitely fail the only compulsory class in the whole school!"
"Come on Songbird, it hardly matters." Kelly said leaning against the table in an annoying nonchalant fashion, a smirk plastered on her face.
"It matters to me!" Phoebe practically shouted.
"Woah… Okay, Songbird has a temper! I'll tell you what, I will get you help with your Chemistry if you help me with something…"
"Okay… What would I have to help you with?"
"Meet me on the roof at 10pm tonight and i'll tell you." Before Phoebe could inquire any further, there was a massive explosion and the vodka that had been resting on top of a bunsen burner beside Phoebe had been knocked off and into the fire, where, it had proceeded to explode into a ball of fire.
Kelly whipped off her lab coat (which Phoebe really hoped was fire proof) and chucked it across the flames spreading with the trail of vodka right across the table.
Two first years then came charging with two buckets of water and lobbed them over the lab coat and flames. There was a sizzle and then Phoebe could smell a burnt out fire smell, she breathed a sigh of relief.
"Kels, about those extra lessons?" Kelly chuckled.
"Meet me on the roof tonight and I'll make damn sure you never have to worry about Chemistry again Songbird. Now, I think we better get cleared up. Don't you?"
"Thanks Jones. 'Cause I for one do not want a repeat of this episode."

"Neither do I! Look, you're filthy even with the lab coat. You go and get changed and I'll make sure someone tidies up here."
"Thanks Kels." Phoebe said whilst ditching the lab coat and brushing herself off.
"No problem Songbird. Now, skidaddle and I'll meet you at lunch in ten."
"See you in ten Kellmyster!" And with that Phoebe ran out the room before she could get called up on the Kellmyster thing.

Phoebe ran into the lunch hall exactly 20 minutes later with sopping wet hair, dressed in black slacks, a tight black shirt and a zip up hoodie with the uniform emblem stitched on the front. That was basically uniform, was it not?
Phoebe walked over to an empty seat next to one of the first years. Just as she was about to sit down she heard a holler.
"Hey... Songbird, where you going? Come sit here."Kelly beckoned her over.
Oh God...Kelly thought. She's going to think your weird, nice one Kels, nice one. Just invite the new girl to come sit next to you. Everyone one will think you're weird; the head girl just invites the newbie, the outcast to come sit next to her. It wasn't Kelly's fault the new girl intrigued her; it was like a drug, the more she learned about her the more addicted she became. How could someone she had known less than 24 hours be so fascinating to her? It was like the girl didn't exist. She was mysterious and bad at Chemistry… Really bad at Chemistry.
Phoebe walked over and plonked herself down on the empty seat next to Kelly.
"Hey, Jones. Miss me? Or just generally holler across lunchrooms a lot?"
"Shut up Songbird!" Kelly said childishly.
Phoebe hadn't got any food herself yet and so pinched a few chips of Kelly's plate before going up to the salad bar to get her own.
Flopping back down again Phoebe started shovelling food into her mouth at top speed.
"Wow! Hungry Songbird?" Kelly said chuckling.
"Yes alright, I'm hungry don't judge." Phoebe said between mouthfuls. Just as she was about to say something else Phoebe's phone began to ring. She reached into her pocket and pulled out her Blackberry.
"Hello?" Phoebe answered.
"Hello, Sweetie." Ah, I wondered how long it would be till she called.
"Hey mum. How are you?"
"Fine, Phebes. I'm fine. But I just wanted to check up on you and check how school is."
"It's fine mum, and nothing 'unusual' has happened. Except the fact I've been ambushed by 10 year olds and discovered how bad I truly am at Chemistry."
"Sounds...Interesting..."
"Yeah; it's certainly been eventful so far." Phoebe spun round as someone tapped her on the shoulder. It was Kelly motioning to the fact she was leaving. "One second Ma."
"Hey Jones, I'll see you later okay."
"Okay. Bye Songbird!" Kelly said running to catch up with some of the geeks.
"Okay Ma, I'm back... What do you mean who was that? That was Kelly, I have made some friends you know." Well Phoebe thought, one friend. If she is a friend, maybe she's just being nice because barley anyone else has taken notice of me. There haven't really been any more pranks either.
"Look Ma, I'm gonna go now, so I'll talk to you later. Oh and tell dad I say hi."
"Bye sweetie. I love you."
"I love you too mum. Bye" With that Phoebe cut off the call and proceeded to leave the lunch hall, not noticing the pair of eyes following her every move.