LEMON warning: *sirens and bells*
Deidara woke to the sound of the TV but didn't remember having fallen asleep with it on. He blinked sleepily and gave wild yell, flailing across the bed as he realised that Hidan was sitting in bed with him watching whatever was on TV.
"Shut it would you, Brady's about to tell Jessica he's leaving her for her mom!" Hidan snorted, eyes transfixed to the reruns of bad daytime soaps. Deidara just stared at him incredulously.
"What the fuck are you doing in my room, yeah?" he exclaimed, grabbing the sheets and wrapping them around himself when he realised that he was completely naked; as was the man sitting beside him.
"You really have a shit memory, don't you?" Hidan rolled his eyes and giving the blonde a small smirk, "I must say I'm insulted if you've already forgotten that we had sex. Three times." Deidara stumbled for words to say but the older man just laughed at him and dragged him closer, "I've already ordered you dinner," he informed him with a small, this time genuine smile, "But in the meantime…" His lips descended on the blonde's bruised, pink lips for a kiss and pushed him onto his back, their naked bodies connecting as Deidara's memories of earlier flooded back to him.
"What –what time is it, yeah?" he inquired, pulling away from the kiss as the bigger man settled between his legs.
"Like seven pm?" Hidan shrugged, his tongue running up the blonde's throat.
" –Oh my god we had sex in the hallway!" Deidara suddenly yelped as three of Hidan's somehow-slicked fingers pushed inside him.
"Yeah we fucking did; and it was fucking fantastic wasn't it?" he smirked, quickly finding his prostate and thrusting his fingers against it. Deidara was flushing crimson at how public they'd been and thanked the stars that they hadn't been caught. Itachi would never let him live it down! He cringed at the pain of Hidan's fingers; his ass aching from their earlier actions, but couldn't help but moan as those fingers brushed up inside him.
"You gotta admit you like me," Hidan smirked, pulling back a little to lube up his already hard cock with something whilst acknowledging the annoyed look the blonde was giving him, "Oh fucking come on, I've been waiting for you to wake up for like three fucking hours." Satisfied that he was slick enough, he lay back over Deidara and pushed his legs back.
There was suddenly a knock at the door, followed by a bored, "Room Service." Deidara immediately squirmed in embarrassment, but Hidan yelled, "Come in!" At the same time as he thrust deep inside the blonde.
So it was that when Shikamaru opened the door, he received a far too explicit eyeful of gay sex involving someone he was familiar with. He just sighed heavily as the blonde beneath Hidan squealed in embarrassment and then tried to hold in a moan as Hidan thrust into him sharply several times.
"I've brought dinner," he announced, "Evening Hidan."
"Yo, Shika," Hidan smirked.
"Hidan, stop it!" Deidara cringed, his eyes wide as he tried to push the bigger man off him and escape the horribly embarrassing situation, "How can you just stand there?"
"Believe me, this isn't the worst I've walked in on," Shikamaru shrugged, "And definitely not the first time I've walked in on Hidan. He's a bit of an exhibitionist sometimes…as I'm sure you're aware of…" Deidara made a pouty affirmative noise as the room service attendant placed their orders on a nearby table and took the money that was already sitting there.
"Hidan, don't let Iruka catch you…again…" he warned in his bored voice as he yawned, "And blondie? If you want to get the upper hand; Hidan's ticklish." Deidara's eyes widened is astonishment and glee, while Hidan's face changed to one of murderous intent.
"Shika, I'm going to have to fucking kill you when I'm done here, aren't I?" he growled in a low tone, beginning to pound into Deidara again to prevent the blonde from starting to tickle him. Shikamaru just gave him a small smirk and with a wave, was gone from the room once again as Deidara moaned, gripping the elder man's neck tightly.
"Hidan, you're a fucking asshole, yeah!"
"…Well I'm definitely fucking your asshole…"
"Why the long face, little brother?" Kankuro inquired from the bar as he poured drinks for Naruto and Gaara as they sat at the surprisingly quiet indoor bar. Gaara just sipped at his drink and glared at his brother mutinously.
"Gaara's still a bit upset about the uhh…way things went at the Hawaiian party," Naruto chortled, beaming at the glaring redhead and paying no attention to the angry scowl he was receiving, "Oh yes; Hinata told me all about it…You seemed to be enjoying Neji's dancing at the time…"
"Neji? Is that the brunette guy you were checking out for most of the night?" Kankuro teased and received such a filthy glare from his little brother that he chuckled and backed away slowly, leaving a bottle of tequila there for the redhead's enjoyment.
"You really think getting drunk is a good idea?" Naruto raised an eyebrow, again receiving an angry glare and a sigh from Gaara.
"I'm going to be honest," he growled in a low, sulking tone, "I never had many friends."
"Big surprise there," the blonde giggled.
" –So when Temari made me come here, I acted how I thought I should to make friends," he snapped back, "And I'm sick of it. I am not fun; I hate swimming and –"
"You should've said from the start, idiot," Naruto laughed, wrapping an arm around Gaara's neck companionably, "I still would've been your friend!" Gaara raised an eyebrow at this, but let himself smile a little as he took another swig of his drink. "And I still will be!"
"Thanks," the redhead replied in a low tone, "But…I think I'm going to wallow by myself for a while…"
"Oh, sure," Naruto's face fell a little, "I'll go find uhh…Kiba…"
" –He's on a date with Hinata," Gaara informed him and the blonde pouted, but ruffled his hair in farewell.
"Well, you have fun being all moody and passive aggressive," Naruto smirked, "See you tomorrow if you don't do something embarrassing tonight!" And he was headed away from the bar with a feigned happy face as he almost ran into Neji, who was skulking in looking rather cross. Naruto almost didn't recognise him because he was dressed in a button-down shirt and nice slacks; but one look from the other man told him to maybe bypass the conversation and keep on walking. He pouted as he looked back over his shoulder; so Hinata and Kiba were on a date, and Gaara got to hang out with his bloody crush tonight? No fair! Where was Sakura?
Gaara felt someone sit down on a seat near him with a heavy sigh.
"…What's your problem?" he inquired grumpily, not looking up from his drink.
" –Being someone I'm not," came the haughty response, "Not that it's any of your business."
"I know the feeling," Gaara muttered, finishing his drink and reaching over for two shot glasses to start the tequila. It was then that he turned his head and recognised the newcomer as Neji; but all he did was sit back down and pour drinks for the both of them, "What's your issue, Neji?"
"This holiday…Hinata wanted to have a different experience," he remarked, already sounding as though he was a bit intoxicated, "And we…we both took acting classes. She wanted me to be fun; and she wanted to be…fun. So I tried. But I am not like that," he shuddered and took the proffered shot gratefully, "I do not act like that when I am drunk." He sighed and pushed the shot glass back over for another, "I want to go back to being me."
"Feel free," Gaara muttered, "I am." The two of them sat, staring into their shots in silence for a long moment before simultaneously knocking them back and slamming the glasses down on the bench.
"I…apologise for my…unsightly behaviour several days ago," Neji remarked in a stiff, formal voice that Gaara suddenly found incredibly attractive. Gaara started pouring again, "I was attempting to fit the image expected of me."
"You licked my face," he stated bluntly; a comment at which Neji's eyes slid towards him without his body changing position.
"…An action of which I am ashamed of and which has caused me to retreat for the last four days," he replied flatly, holding out a hand to catch another shot.
"Ice cream and bad daytime soaps?" Gaara inquired shortly.
"Indeed," came the formal reply, "I shall be relieved when this nightmarish holiday is over."
"Agreed," the redhead nodded, and the two of them downed another shot. Neji's eyes fluttered a little bit as the alcohol started to course through his system.
"So I have admitted to acting like a fool as a drunkard and joining in with Naruto and Hinata's concepts of 'fun'," Neji stated, "…What was your crime?"
"Much the same," Gaara admitted in his gravelly monotone voice that Neji was finding himself a little entranced by now.
"And the clumsiness?"
"Natural," came the redhead's rather bitter response; reliving all those humiliating falls he had experienced in front of Neji.
The brunette turned his head to face Gaara with an interestingly blank, yet condescending expression. Pale eyes roved across the redhead's pale skin and drank in the messy mop of hair and turquoise eyes.
"I believe the alcohol may have influenced my judgement in saying this," he remarked haughtily, after a moment of silence, "But I must admit that you are rather –"
" –Say 'cute' and I will end you," Gaara growled under his breath. Neji smirked to himself.
"I like this Gaara," he remarked, sipping at the beer Kankuro had slid down the bar to break up the shots the two were taking.
"I prefer this Neji," came Gaara's snarky reply. Kankuro chuckled to himself as he watched the two of them smirk slightly into their drinks before simultaneously taking a long swig and falling into companionable, blissful silence.
Meanwhile, at the dining hall, Itachi was sitting at a table in the dining room in a black dress shirt and pants, tapping his fingers on the table agitatedly; trying to remind himself that a date being ten minutes late wasn't anything to stress about. He was so lost in his own thoughts that he didn't hear the chair being pulled out from the opposite side of the table, and nearly fell off his chair in surprise when he noticed Kisame looking at him with a grin.
"I was just apologising for being late, but it seems you didn't even notice," he remarked with a small chuckle, "Sorry; there was just the ending of a great movie on TV and I had to finish watching a certain scene…"
"What movie?" Itachi inquired, only really half listening and asking just to be polite; having only just managed to drag himself away from The Fellowship of the Ring about half an hour ago to finish getting ready.
"Lord of the Rings," Kisame admitted with an embarrassed smile.
"Boromir's death scene?" Itachi inquired, and then mirrored the embarrassed smile, "I was watching it before I came down here too –" Kisame's mouth fell open in astonishment; mostly because Itachi was just referencing Lord of the Rings –his greatest love in the entire world.
" –And you didn't stay to watch his death?" the lifeguard exclaimed incredulously, "It's like the best scene in the entire movie!"
"And the most emotional!" the raven reminded him, "Seriously, if I'd watched it, I probably would've needed a few hours to get back into a stable state of mind. His final words were so compelling –"
"Favourite character, hands down," Kisame admitted.
"Not Aragorn?" Itachi raised an eyebrow, "The self-exiled king-to-be trying to do penance for the wrongs of his ancestors whilst involved in a forbidden romance; what's not to love?"
"Boromir," Kisame affirmed confidently, "A perfect example of a regular guy trying to do what's best for his people with a bad-ass redeeming death!" Itachi laughed out loud at this, "If you're laughing at Boromir, I swear to god I am leaving this table…"
"No, it's not that," Itachi chuckled, feeling suddenly more at ease with knowing that there was someone in the world that shared his ridiculous love for Lord of the Rings; and it just so happened to be the insanely hot lifeguard, "I just didn't expect you to be a fan!"
"…I literally told Kankuro to drop hints about what I was into to your blonde friend," Kisame rolled his eyes.
"Bloody Deidara…" Itachi cursed with a sigh, picking up his menu and looking at his watch, "Oh excellent, you've been here for five minutes and I haven't done anything embarrassing yet."
"I was keeping track too," the other man grinned, "So, what do you want? My treat."
" –You 'rescued' me from the pool," Itachi reminded him; his nerves slowly ebbing away, "Shouldn't I be the one paying?"
"Employee discount," Kisame countered with.
"Oh, fair enough," Itachi reasoned, "…So how do you feel about the portrayal of elves?"
" –Don't even get me started on Elrond…"
Naruto had just entered the pool complex after just having about three rounds of pool against himself, and spied a familiar pink-haired beauty sitting at the pool. With delighted thoughts of spending some time in her company, he made a beeline for her; stopping when he recognised the familiar raven sitting in the seat next to her. A frustrated growl escaped his lips as he spun away; pouting. Every damn time! God, was everyone having fun tonight except him?
With a snort, he headed over and sat down on one of the sunbeds; looking up at the big moon and trying to think of something interesting to do. He came up with squat that could be done by himself –he'd already amused himself by pushing all the buttons in the elevator and prank calling room service –he'd gotten Shikamaru once or twice and the other boy had at least pretended to listen to him for a while; probably to get out of doing any actual work.
Just as he was thinking that maybe a *shudder* early night was in the cards; or even worse…family game night, a shadow above him blocked the moonlight.
"Where's your usual gang of clowns, idiot?" Sasuke inquired, hands in his pockets. Naruto made an offended noise.
"Out on dates," he snorted crossly, folding his arms, "Even you are…" he said it with such disdain with a violent head gesture in the direction of the bar that Sasuke could only smirk at him.
"Well, she's free now," the raven shrugged casually, "Itachi's on a date too and I thought I might go spy on him." Naruto raised an eyebrow at him and looked back over to the bar to see that Sakura was still there; now alone, "…Though I'm sure Sakura will be much more entertaining." And with that, he turned his back and started heading off in the direction of the dining hall. Naruto stared at the raven at he walked away slowly, and his eyes flicked to the bar, where the girl of his dreams was sitting; practically waiting for him. And then she turned and looked over at Sasuke.
In that moment, he realised that maybe she wasn't the girl of his dreams, and that maybe, yes, going to spy on Sasuke's older brother seemed like a far more appealing offer. And, the bastard had just practically invited him to hang out! He was getting good at speaking Sasuke language!
With a grin, he leapt up and chased down the raven, latching onto him and looping his arm through the other boy's companionably; ignoring the glare he was given for such familiar contact.
"So, what's the deal; are we ruining or just spying?"
"Tch, idiot."
Sakura watched the two boys leave the pool complex arm-in-arm and slumped forward in her seat with a heavy sigh.
"What's the problem, sweetheart?" Kankuro inquired curiously, a little grateful to Kakashi for assigning him to this dead shift; he'd enjoyed his last chat with the pinkette; and she'd enjoyed some of his magic tricks –and he could've sworn her saw her at one of the kid's puppet shows he put on during the day sometimes.
"Men," she sighed heavily.
"Mister tall, dark and handsome over there not work out?" he inquired with a raised eyebrow.
"Something like that," she replied, twirling the straw in her drink, "I guess that's just the way it goes sometimes…" Again, she sighed.
"Hey, don't be like that," Kankuro shrugged, "If you stick around for a bit; I get off at nine? Dinner; on me. Not all guys are jackasses, you know." Sakura looked up as the bartender gave her a grin and a brief wink before heading over to polish some glasses, "It's cool; you can say no…" he added after misinterpreting her silence as hesitation rather than surprise.
"No, no; that'd be great," she admitted with a small blush that accompanied the realisation that he was actually pretty cute; and he'd done amazing magic tricks; and yes she had gone to one –or three –of his puppet shows just to see what they were like… "So what's it like working here? I'm sure you've got some good work stories."
"I don't even think you'd believe me if I told you. I don't even believe some of them," he laughed as she gave him a very confused –very intrigued look, "…Shikamaru's seen some terrible things…"
Kisame noticed Itachi's eye twitching in irritation at something behind him and chuckled to himself as he took a bite of his dessert. So the Uchiha had finally noticed their little observers hiding in one of the flower pots? He was a little surprised he hadn't noticed earlier; the two of them had literally been sitting two tables away; hiding behind menus until a waitress caught them and tried to kick them out. Now, Itachi's not-so-kid brother and his blonde friend were peering out at the two of them from behind the fronds of a palm. Feeling a little playful, and already knowing how much the Uchiha hated to be embarrassed, he decided to humour their little stalkers.
With one hand, he grabbed Itachi's chin softly and held up the fork holding a piece of his dessert. Itachi; too surprised to do anything else, opened his mouth and accepted the morsel, blushing furiously. As the fork was laid down, Kisame laid his hand on top of the raven's and intertwined their fingers. The blush deepened and Itachi tried to tug his hand away; to no avail. Kisame cheekily sent a subtle wink towards where Sasuke and Naruto were hiding.
"Oh this is gold," Sasuke smirked, "…Itachi's going to hate if I tell mother about this…"
"Why did Kisame just wink at us?" Naruto inquired in a whisper as they chuckled in hysterical, silent laughter; also having noticed Hinata and Kiba enjoying a nice meal over at another table.
" –He's trying to embarrass Itachi," Sasuke replied, covering his mouth to try and stuff the giggles back down his throat. The fact that Sasuke was actually laughing was making Naruto laugh even harder, and it was getting harder and harder to avoid being noticed.
Kisame leaned across the table with a small grin; his lips brushing against Itachi's ear
"You think they're enjoying themselves?" he inquired cheekily. Itachi instantly turned to stare at him; cheeks flushing and his expression deadly.
"You knew they were there?" he growled, loud enough for Sasuke and Naruto to hear. The two of them, knowing that their cover was completely blown; fell out from behind the pot plant, holding their guts with laughter, "Sasuke Uchiha, if you don't leave right now –" the rest of his threat was cut off by both Sasuke and Naruto being hauled up by their arms by a very amused Kakashi and promptly escorted from the dining hall. The supervisor was chuckling as he did so, so the two of them knew they weren't in that much trouble. As they were pushed out into the hallway, they both chuckled a little and Naruto grinned.
"Wanna go prank call Shikamaru?"
Around the same time that Sakura and Kankuro were headed to the dining room, a by-now very drunk Gaara was trying to stagger his way back to his room. He'd left Neji a little earlier; and the elder boy had been able to steady him, so now, he wasn't doing so well on his own. The alcohol, combined with his natural clumsiness and the memory of Neji's hair brushing against his face was proving to be a combination detrimental to his stability.
Somehow; just somehow, he managed to survive the ride up the elevator to the third floor, and he made it to Temari's room, knocking on it hard.
"T-Temari?" he called out, followed by a hiccup, "I-I lost…left my key…" He groaned loudly and clutched at his head as the world started rotating. The door in front of him opening and he immediately collapsed into his big sister's arms.
"Gaara…" she sighed, rolling her eyes and opening his door; which had been unlocked the entire time. With a little bit of effort, she managed to drag him inside and get him to lie on the bed, where he promptly curled into the foetal position and groaned dramatically. With a small laugh at the pitiful state of her brother, she picked up the phone and dialled for room service.
"Yeah?" came the slack response.
"Is this Shikamaru?" she immediately snapped crossly.
"Oh, hello Temari," he replied in that same, lazy voice, "What can I do for you?" She sighed heavily.
"…My little brother's drunk; could you send up some ice and water and just anything for him to eat?" she requested.
"Sure; it'll be up in a sec," he replied casually and he hung up. Temari sat on the bed, rubbing Gaara's back as he turned and lay on his stomach; probably trying to stop the world from spinning any more than it already was. She couldn't help but feel both sorry for him and that he had it coming to him. Serves him right for drinking so much!
"Oh Gaara, what am I going to do with you?" she murmured quietly.
"Kill me –anything to stop the world spinning," he groaned, clutching at his head and then rolling again. She just settled with sitting at his side until a few minutes later, room service was knocking on her door.
To her great surprise, it was Shikamaru.
"I didn't know you could move so fast," she remarked haughtily as he wandered over with some iced water and what looked to be a toasted sandwich.
"There are a lot of things you don't know about me," he reminded her with a careless smile, helping Gaara sit up so that he could accept what was offered, "No, let me help –it'll be easier with both of us. Help me get him into the shower…"
So it was that about an hour later, Gaara was fed, watered and bathed (all with a great deal of reluctance on his part and a lot of clutching at the bed-legs swearing he didn't ever want to shower again). Temari was exhausted from all the tugging and carrying –at least she didn't have to deal with keeping Gaara in the shower; that had been Shikamaru's job. She had just closed the door on a finally sleeping little brother, and turned to discover that her helper was drenched to the bone.
"What –"
"Apparently it was only fair that if he had to have a shower against his will, so did I," Shikamaru explained with a shrug, "It's troublesome…but oh well…" He wrung his hair out and tugged at his completely saturated and now see-through white shirt, "The mess can be for the maids…" He pushed his trolley alongside her down to the next room, where she blushed a little as she realised that he actually kind of suited the whole being-drenched kind of look.
"Thanks for helping me with him," she muttered, avoiding his gaze and knowing that he was just giving her that weird, casual half-smile that he always did. He just smirked and opened her door for her, yawning as he did so.
"Better than answering the phone," he shrugged, "Hope he recovers." And just like that, he was off down the hallway; and Temari watched him go with curiosity; taking in the way his shirt was slightly untucked and was now clinging to his rather lean figure; and how he had his shirt unprofessionally rolled up. He was so different to most guys she came across; guys who were proper; dressed themselves well; had a stellar work ethic…organised and structured –that was what she was accustomed to…and here was Shikamaru; so very different.
It was nearing eleven when Kisame and Itachi finally stopped outside Itachi's room. If they were in a romantic comedy, Itachi would've been comparable to the nervous girl playing with her keys at her door, waiting for her date to kiss her. Itachi unfortunately realised this, and disliked the comparison.
"…I had a good time," Kisame remarked, knowing how lame he sounded, "I…uhh…shall we do this again?" Itachi wasn't really listening to him; he'd been transfixed by the other man's lips for a good while now, and he was too distracted to register words being formed with them. So, instead of answering, he grabbed the front of Kisame's shirt and dragged him forward into a searing kiss.
Itachi's back slammed into the door as Kisame kissed back passionately; tongues delving into each other's mouths wildly. The raven knew without proper, conscious thought that he wanted this man, and needed him; tonight. Hoping that by wrapping his arms around the broad shoulders would give the hint, he pulled Kisame closer.
Their make-out session in the hallways was abruptly interrupted by the door opening, and the amused face of Itachi's little brother staring out at him in his sleeping pants. Kisame had never seen Itachi's face so livid as he simultaneously grabbed the bigger man by the arm and shoved Sasuke from the room.
"You. Out. Now," Itachi demanded aggressively, and Kisame couldn't deny that seeing him like that was hot. Sasuke barely had time to protest before the door was slammed shut again in his face, and Itachi had swiftly locked it before latching onto Kisame's mouth.
" –Itachi, this is my room too!" Sasuke snarled, knocking on the door and getting no answer. He shuddered, thinking better of going to get another key; there was no way he wanted to be in the same room as the two of them; at least not when he brother was horny. That mere thought made him shudder in revulsion again and he sighed, heading for Naruto's floor.
Within minutes, Itachi was lying on the edge of his bed completely naked, with two enormous fingers deep inside him. He moaned like a whore as he felt Kisame's other huge hand swiftly stroking his hardened cock and his hips unconsciously bucked up to meet each stroke. Kisame chuckled deeply at the younger man's eagerness, but obliged when the raven glared down at him to get on with what he really wanted –and what he really wanted was that huge cock inside him.
Anticipation running through Itachi's lithe body, he eagerly parted his legs and let the bigger man settle between them. He'd always had a bit of a thing for big guys; but this…he felt the head of Kisame's cock against his entrance and made a satisfied (all-too slutty) moan deep in his throat.
"Keep moaning like that and you're going to make me cum…" Kisame whispered in his ear, kissing his neck and nipping at the skin with a sharp tooth. With a sly look, Itachi rolled his hips and repeated the noise; eliciting a deep growl from the other man as he slowly started to press inside him.
Sasuke, who had only just made it to the elevator after deliberating the best course of action to correct his sleeping dilemma, cringed when he heard a loud moan resonate through the empty hallway; not enjoying or at all comfortable with the knowledge that his brother was a screamer.
The suite that Naruto shared with his family was unlocked, so Sasuke let himself in and knocked sharply on the blonde's door several times before it was opened.
Naruto was blinking sleepily and rubbing his eyes; failing to conceal a yawn.
"Oi, bastard, what's the big idea?" he snapped, but the words had no bite to them.
" –Itachi kicked me out of his room because he wanted to have sex," Sasuke offered as an explanation, rather cross, "Can I have a blanket for the couch?" Naruto yawned again and waved for him to follow him into the room.
"Don't be dumb, my bed's big enough," he muttered, crawling up along the bed and slipping under the blankets, "Shut the door after you." Sasuke, since it was dark, allowed himself a small pout before following the blonde in and shutting the door quietly behind him before clambering into the opposite side of the massive bed. There was another yawn.
"I hope everyone else…had a good night," Naruto mumbled, "Night Sasuke…"
"Night…Naruto."
Note: Itachi's description of his reaction to Boromir's death scene in Fellowship of the Ring is a fairly accurate generalisation of how I feel after watching it. The last time I watched it I burst into uncontrollable, incredibly audible sobbing, and for about the following two hours, if anyone made any kind of reference to his dying words I broke down emotionally. That shit's beautiful.
That's all for the moment; will be uploading the rest and possibly first sequel in a few days' time! If you're new to the story, feel free to follow; leave a review; something like that: always appreciated!
xx K