[A/N]: This idea was in my head since I read HoH. It sets place after the second Giant War. Song: "Animal I have become", by Three Days Grace
WARNING: Self-harm (not heavily), Dark, kind of BoyxBoy but no slash, a few spoilers from HoO (mainly HoH).
I hope you enjoy it ^^ Please remember to leave a review with what you thought of it after reading. They really do help! Just like ice, chocolate and cookies help healing the broken heart ;P
Animal I have become
Nico woke up in a start, his head covered with sweat. He tried to control his breathing, but failed miserably. A tear escaped his eyes, but he swept it away so nobody would see it, even though he was all alone in his cabin. For the hundredth time since they'd returned, he wished Bianca was here. He bit his lip when he remembered her soothing smile and mother-like actions.
Another tear escaped, but this time he made no attempt to swipe it away. Hazel had gone back to Camp Jupiter, so she could be with Frank. Nico didn't blame her, it was her home after all.
He didn't have a home. They had made that perfectly clear when he had been in that place. That he would forever be rejected by others. That there was no place that would accept him for who he was. He would always get those weird looks from everyone. Or even worse, sympathy.
Like Jason. Ever since he'd confessed his feelings for Percy in front of him, he'd somehow given himself the task to help Nico. He didn't need help. No, he didn't want help.
He stood up and walked toward the mirror in the corner of the cabin. It had once been from Bianca, but Nico never got the heart to remove it from his cabin. He looked at himself through the mirror. Even if it was completely dark, he could still see his broken face. Nico gritted his teeth when he looked at his body. The body that was disfigured when he was in that place.
He let out a scream when he broke the mirror with his fist.
His reflection looked at him. The bursts in the mirror revealed his hidden wounds perfectly. One split his reflection in half. He'd tried to escape those wounds, but he now realized it was useless. The wounds had become scars, unable to disappear. All he could do was hide them.
A tear streamed over is cheeks, down to his chin. Nico looked at his own reflection as if it was the scariest thing in the world. His reflection did the same. The light in his eyes went dull.
He was trapped in his own broken body and there was nothing he could do.
He wanted to scream again, but no sound escaped his throat. The blood from his knuckled dripped on the floor, leaving a red trail. He looked at his hand, clenched it until they lost their color. The blood left an intoxicating smell in his nose.
He looked at his reflection again. Some pieces of glass started to fall off. Black holes appeared on the places where they left. The emptiness. He thought back to his nightmare. The same emptiness had filled his dream.
The darkness. The pain. He had wanted to scream, but couldn't. Just like now. He had wanted escape the darkness, but couldn't. Just like now. He had wanted somebody to help him. With everything. But nobody came. Just like now.
Nobody would ever help him, since nobody loved him. A greater piece of the glass fell on the ground. Nico picked it up and looked at it. The emptiness in his eyes changed into something else. Something far more dangerous.
He let out a scream and pushed the table before him away. A picture of his sister and him fell on the ground. Glass from the frame damaged the happy looks on each of their faces.
He held his face and couldn't stop the tears from flowing out. A small chuckle filled the silence in his cabin. He didn't realize who it was, until he saw his reflection looking at him with the eyes of a madman. He was going crazy.
The chuckle turned into a full-out laugh. The laugh turned into a scream. He couldn't take it anymore. He could feel shadows pulling at him, surrounding him, when somebody opened the door. Nico could see that it was still dark outside, but the rest of his vision was blocked by the boy standing where the door should have been.
"GO AWAY!", Nico screamed at the boy. He knew fully well who it was. He didn't want him to see him like this. He let the shadows cover his body, making his body go black as if it was the darkness itself.
"Nico?"
"GO AWAY!", he screamed again, but he saw that it had no effect when the boy entered his cabin and closed the door.
"I heard you scream and couldn't sleep, so I thought I would check up on you. Nico, where are you?", Nico realized the boy couldn't see him due to the lack of light. The shadows that had surrounded him, retreated just as fast as they arrived.
"Nico, where are you?", the boy asked again, but Nico didn't answer. "Let me help you."
Nico shook his head, his face buried in his hands, but realized the boy couldn't see him. "I don't need your sympathy", the boy turned toward the direction of Nico's voice. Nico took a step backwards when the boy walked toward him.
"I know you have nightmares as well, Nico. I want to help", Nico stood against the wall now. He bit his lip until blood streamed out of it. He wanted to scream so badly.
"You can't help me. I'm far too gone for that." Another tear escaped his eyes and he felt the anger boil inside of him. He wasn't angry at the boy. No, he was angry at himself. He slammed the back of his head against the wall. The pain helped to stop the sadness. He felt his head going lighter and lighter. Little did he realize that he was slowly losing his consciousness.
"NICO!", a voice stopped him from giving in to the darkness. He opened his eyes again when he felt strong arms keeping him steady. "Nico, stop", the boy whispered. It sounded... Scared... Why would he be scared?
"Are you afraid of me?", Nico whispered back, afraid that would be the case. Nico could feel the boy tense up a little.
"Why would I be afraid of you?", Nico looked at him confused. Even though the boy didn't see anything, he managed to look Nico in the eyes. Again, anger boiled inside Nico and he hit the wall. A small gasp escaped the boy's mouth.
"This is who I am, Percy! You should go away and ignore me", his voice cracked a bit, "Just like the others."
Percy looked at him again. The look in his eyes was something Nico hadn't seen in years. No sympathy, but understanding. Nico tensed when Percy hugged him. A tear streamed over his already wet face. "This isn't you, Nico. You can fight this." It didn't seem like Percy talked to Nico though. It was as if he was trying to soothe himself too.
Nico's body relaxed and he smiled into the darkness of his cabin. A sincere one this time. He could do this, with his help.
~ Removed the lyrics, due to copy-right issues ~