One quinjet brought the heroes back to the helicarrier while the SHIELD agents had to guard the alien bodies until they could be relieved by other agents. I stayed quiet and simply watched as agents hurried to and fro getting ready to clean up the mess the aliens had made. Having no further information that would be relevant for at least a year, I was no longer needed. Since I was sort of in the middle of a walk way, I found a way to haphazardly move my wheelchair to the other side of the table so the lower minions could make their way to their leaders. Both Coulson and Hill were taking and receiving numerous orders.
I briefly considered who was really the Director's right hand. Coulson seemed to have more field work, but Hill was needed for behind the scenes operations. Fury had called Coulson his 'one good eye,' but that might have been slightly exaggerated in his grief. Basically deciding that Coulson was more Fury in the field and Hill was Fury in daily ministrations, I had nothing to further occupy my thoughts. A wheelchair is not the most comfortable place to sleep, but I was somewhat dosing when a nurse came up to me.
"Miss Christenson? We are going to take you to get a CAT scan, alright?"
"Of course." I liked how as soon as job imposing Coulson was out of the way, the nurse was ready to take back her patient.
I'd never had a CAT scan before, but I was just glad I didn't fall asleep while laying down. That would have thrown off the scan and made the nurse worried since she had told me to stay awake. After analyzing the scan, she told me everything looked fine, but that she wanted me to stay awake for a couple more hours. I could already feel the drain of the day, but I agreed to make a valiant effort to remain conscious.
"I don't mean to be any inconvenience, but do you know where I could find out where my stuff got put?"
"I'll take you there, Rachel." Coulson, who I was sure was supposed to be busy right now, had been waiting just outside the room with the cat scanner. Steering my wheelchair down the hall, I felt a little flabbergasted at the personal touch. Couldn't he have much easily sent a lower minion to take me there? I mean, now that I didn't know the future and had very little use for SHIELD, surely Coulson himself was not needed.
"I don't mean to be a bother. The nurse just said I needed to stay awake for the next little while, so I thought I would pull out my art supplies or even my laptop...You had to confiscate my technology didn't you? Can I just have my past art projects from my laptop? Just a flash drive with those and nothing else. Everything else is replaceable." Since he was pushing me from behind, I couldn't even see Coulson's face.
"Your technology was swept for bugs, viruses, and the like before being returned to you. Nothing was damaged or removed." That was a huge relief, especially since some of my art work had subject material that was classified in this universe. Having them play musical instruments was not the first piece I had the avengers in.
"Thank you so much, Agent Coulson."
We traveled in silence until we reached a door. It opened to a small room with a bed, a nightstand with a lamp, another door which hopefully lead to a bathroom, and my bags. As he rolled my chair beside my things, I remembered why I was in a wheelchair in the first place. Clint. I had hurt him in so many ways. Physically, I had pounded my head into his repeatedly. Worse, psychologically I had destroyed his trust in his own actions. There was no full recovering from such a violation of the mind. Clint had especially remained a character, not a person, in my mind up until this point. A character could be asked to make such a sacrifice for the greater good of the storyline. A person, however...a person should be protected.
"Rachel?" A worried voice broke through my thoughts, and I saw Coulson kneeling next to me. I couldn't ask a SHIELD agent for a hug, could I? Especially since I only wanted one to lessen the guilt that I had rightly gained for doing such a horrible thing to Clint.
"I need to apologize to Clint." Coulson took a long look at me. As he figured out how to arrange such a thing, I tried to figure out the best way to do so. My thoughts were cut short.
"No." Don't you dare give me the determined face! The guilt is eating me alive!
"I mean, not straight out say, sorry I..." the words got a little caught in my throat, "knowingly put you in a situation where Loki would have control over your every action. I mean...do something..." His facial features softened somewhat.
"Not now at least. At least come up with a proper response that won't get you killed." Why did Coulson care? I was no longer a SHIELD asset, but a liability. A small liability, but one all the same. Could I hug him now? "Would you rather stay in your wheelchair, or do you want help onto the bed?"
"I didn't break my legs," I gave him a soft smile. "Let me try to move a foot to the left by myself." Since he smiled back, I guessed he wasn't offended. I stood up slowly, but was still dizzy. I held my arms out to balance myself, and then felt hands grasp my shoulders. "Just dizzy, Agent Coulson. I'm fine now."
As I settled myself on the bed, I recognized that Coulson's hands were itching to hover. Sending him a confused glance, I studied his face. He was concerned, and about me. I knew he was the overseer of Natasha, Clint, Tony, and probably the rest of the avengers now, but I was probably the only one he could baby just a little. The others would be highly offended. To take care of Stark, he had to threaten to taser him. Natasha and Clint would probably minimize their pain and injuries if Coulson everwent mother hen on them as well as lose their respect for him. He really cared though, and he would probably make a really great dad.
"Could you hand me the brown shoulder bag?" Once it was in my hands, I gave him a huge smile and began pulling out my art supplies. "I should be just fine for a couple hours now that I have these. The Director probably has a million things for you to do to organize the clean up of Stark Tower. Thank you for all your help, Agent Coulson." I was thanking him for the help to my room as well as just for all he had done the last couple days. I had no idea if I would ever see him again.
"Rachel, you are officially my responsibility right now, so please take care of yourself." And don't do anything stupid, was the unspoken ending to that sentence. He had slyly also let me know he had heard the goodbye in my voice and that it was not goodbye at all. Though, even if I was his responsibility, he could easily assign a lackey to me. Lots of things were probably his 'personal' responsibility which he delegated to others in his command.
"I'll be here coloring." I tried to make my voice as innocent as possible, especially since I had no intentions of moving.
"I think your talent could be explained a little more eloquently than coloring." His hand flew to his ear. "Forgive me. My presence is required somewhere else." He left my stunned presence before I could thank him for his compliment.
Overcoming the brain block, I began to plan an art piece. How about a collage of drawings of what each avenger looked like when I first actually met them. Captain would be sitting on a bench with a strained, contemplative look. Coulson through the crack in my hotel door. Natasha ready and waiting in India. Banner walking cautiously toward me. Tony bringing Loki into the quinjet with his Iron Man mask up so I can see his face. Thor landing in a crouch on the landing outside the quinjet. Clint crouched and dangerous in the rafters.
Clint. I still needed to figure out something to do. Wait! I could show him that Natasha actually cared about him. I simply needed a recording of her and Coulson's telephone conversation. SHIELD probably monitored all calls made by Coulson, so I simply needed someone to hack into SHIELD.
"Sir Jarvis?"
"Yes, Miss Rachel?" I still couldn't keep the goofy grin off my face at the reply.
"Could you do a really big favor for me, Jarvis?"
"I shall try, Miss Rachel. I appreciate how you watched out for Mr. Stark." Ignoring the last statement, since it made me blush, I described what I wanted. When he confirmed he could do that, I began trying to plan how to get it to Clint. It would be best for me if I could send it anonymously, but Clint might get suspicious of a random recording just playing. Having a suspicious SHIELD agent, especially one who had just been compromised, would not do anyone good.
"I have what you requested, Miss Rachel."
"Thank you so much, Sir Jarvis. Could you direct me to where Agent Barton currently is?"
"Most certainly." As I carefully stood up and sat in the wheelchair, I realized I had another question I needed answered before I went anywhere.
"Is Agent Barton alone?"
"He is currently with Agent Romanov." I heard a little bit of disgust in his tone, and I realized Tony's AI was probably as angry with Natasha as Tony was for fooling all of them while Tony was sick from the arc reactor.
"Alright then. Directions, please."
As I traveled down several hallways and got the hang of moving a wheelchair, I devised a lie for having Clint listen to the audio. When I was directed to stop at a certain door, I instead went around the corner. There I stood up from my wheelchair. After the dizziness had faded, and I should walk without using the wall, I went back to the door.
"Are they speaking just now, Sir Jarvis?"
"No, there conversation had currently stopped."
"Awkwardly?" I did not want to walk into a tense situation between two master assassins.
"They are simply lost in their own thoughts at the moment." Waiting a moment to gather my courage, I carefully opened the door.
"Agent Romanov, can I talk to you in the hall?" I asked as politely as I could. She nodded and I closed the door to give them privacy once more. A moment later, Natasha exited the room. "I was told Agent Barton was with you, and I was just wondering if I could speak to him privately? I know this is highly unusual..." She took in my unsure posture and meek disposition.
"Rachel, he didn't mean to do what he did to you. He was under Loki's spell..." I simply raised a hand and smiled sadly at her.
"I know perfectly well Agent Barton was not himself. I simply wish to speak with him, if that is alright?"
I still wasn't sure what I wanted to say and separating Natasha and Clint really didn't go toward paying off my debts, so I was sincerely asking Natasha if it was alright. She simply opened the door and silently gestured for me to go in. I breathed a sigh of relief when she didn't follow me in. In retaliation, my lungs took a big gulp of air as I braced myself for facing Clint.
"Hello Agent Barton, my name is Rachel. How is your head?" I was still guilty about attacking him. I really hoped he wouldn't notice my own weak stance since I didn't want him to feel guilty himself. Thankfully, all of my bruising was on the back of my head.
"Still pounding a little, just don't tell Natasha, I mean, Agent Romanoff." I smiled kindly at him.
"I knew who you were talking about." He seemed to take a good look at me for the first time.
"Not many are cleared for that kind of information." I was able to brush that off.
"Mr. Stark has a big mouth." Clint snorted in agreement.
"I've heard stories. Did you happen to know how many agents I killed? Natasha won't tell me." I grimaced as I remembered I couldn't have possibly saved everyone. I realized I had deluded myself a little up until this point. However, I didn't want Clint feeling guilty, so I carefully sculpted my response.
"No, but I'm sure it was as few as possible. I know they had a limited leak which helped get some people out of your way. Probably not everyone, but that's not on your conscious, it's on Loki's," And mine.
"Not sure if that guy has a conscious."
"That argument has several valid points." I couldn't even give a good counter argument even with the background I knew.
"You trying to figure that guy out?" I seemed to have surprised Clint.
"Mostly have, that's the sad part." I felt like Clint was not the person to give my sympathy speech to, so I decided to cut to the chase. "I have some audio that I think you would like to hear. Apparently someone high up feels bad about your compromised condition." In some ways I felt like Clint was looking right through my lies, but I kept up the act.
"Who?" I scoffed.
"I just follow orders. You ready to listen?" At his nod, I told the walls, "Play audio."
"We need you to come in."
"Are you kidding? I'm working." I smiled at Natasha's exasperated tone.
"This takes precedence."
"I'm in the middle of an interrogation with this moron who is giving me everything." I remembered the 'torturers' incredulous actions. "Look, you can't pull me out of this right now."
"Natasha...Barton has been compromised." There was a long drawn out pause.
"I'm putting you on hold."
"Stop," I commanded. That was exactly what I needed for Clint to hear.
"Why did you want me to hear that?" Was he being the typical thick headed male or was he in denial? Surely he wanted to believe that Natasha loved him...Fool! I had no idea if Clint loved her! Why would he be looking for signs of her loving him back if he didn't love her? Natasha was going to kill me for even hinting to Clint that she might love him. This was the exact opposite of paying back my debt! Wait, he asked a question. Answer the question, Rachel!
"Because someone told me to play it for you. No idea why. No need to anger Agent Romanov now that my job is done." Thinking I was home free, I turned for the door, but Clint stopped me.
"Have you been to medical?" Drat! I had shown him the back of my bruised head!
"They say I need to stay awake for another hour or so, but otherwise I'm fine. Thanks for the worry though. I would have thought a lowly SHIELD intelligence assistant would be beyond your concern." I quickly exited after that and found Natasha waiting outside. "Thank you, Agent Romanov. I won't bother either of you anymore." Hopefully something good came from all of that. Even if Clint didn't realize he loved Natasha yet, or really didn't, maybe he would.
I still had at least another hour before I could submit to the sleep my body was craving for, and since I was already out and about the helicarrier, I decided to watch the other man who was more character than person in my mind. Loki.