Lassiter has these two college kids scared out of their wits. He smirked to himself in satisfaction as they confessed to taking small items from the museum and selling them while they were at school.
"And when Mark Wilkens found you out, you killed him," Lassiter was leaning on the table with both hands, giving the two kids a steely gaze.
"Killed?" Ben looked shocked.
"We took those buttons, but we never killed anyone," Kyle was pale. "Mr. Wilkens didn't even know that stuff was missing. He was too busy flirting with Mrs. Miller."
"They were totally stepping out," Ben added. "I mean, not that I blame him, cause she's hot."
"Her?" Kyle looked at his friend. "She's too old, man."
"Regardless," Lassiter shouted to get their attention.
"Plus, we were in Marquette last night." Ben said quietly. "We weren't supposed to go back, but there was a great party and we would have been the laughing stock of the whole school if we had skipped."
"Do you have anyone sober who can verify that?" Lassiter crossed his arms.
"Yes!" Both boys chorused.
"Let me give you some numbers," Ben offered scribbling a handful of names and phone numbers on the sheet of paper Lassiter had meant for their confession.
Lassiter handed the paper to Buzz and then motioned the deputy to follow him out of the room.
"Do you really think those boys are capable of murder?" Buzz asked.
"The human mind is a demented place," Lassiter reminded him. He came out into the main part of the office to see sandwich papers and crumbs all over his desk. "Those two idiots had better learn to clean up after themselves or I'll fine them for littering." He grumbled, sweeping the trash off his desk and into the wastebasket.
He paused as he saw the report on the murder weapon sitting on his desk. He knew he hadn't seen it before, the time stamp on the fax was from forty minutes earlier; when he'd be in interrogation. His eyes narrowed when he saw the sticky purple fingerprints along the side.
"Spencer," he growled.
The door to the station burst open and Juliet came running in. She was no longer muddy and her still damp hair was pulled back in a messy bun. "Carlton! Have you seen Shawn?"
"He looked at this and left with Guster," Lassiter held up the fax. "I don't know what he saw in it, the only new piece of information is that the killer used their left hand."
"He texted me while I was in the shower," Juliet was trying to catch her breath. "He said he knew who the killer was and he was going to confront them with Gus after they picked up Ryan."
"Damn it," Lassiter looked at McNab. "You stay here with the juvenile delinquents. O'Ha- Juliet, you're with me. We need to know who they went after."
"You said the knife was wielded by a lefty?" Juliet had to hurry to keep up with Lassiter's long strides.
The sheriff slammed the door of the jeep shut and nodded. "Yes, but that only helps us if-" Lassiter paused. "Jessica Miller is left-handed."
"And she has access to the knife," Juliet pulled out her phone. "I bet she's at the museum. If only Shawn would pick up!"
OoOOoOOoO
"So, tell me again why we're going to the museum?" Gus asked from the passenger seat as Shawn pulled into the museum parking lot. "Ryan won't be here."
"We're not here to see Ryan," Shawn didn't meet Gus' gaze.
Gus turned off the car, but didn't open his door. "Shawn, what are we doing here?"
"Possibly stopping a fleeing criminal," Shawn bolted out his door, heading for the museum entrance.
"Shawn!" Gus also ran after his friend. He didn't really want to face a criminal, but he didn't want Shawn to face them on his own either.
The museum was quiet. The lights were off except for the security lights, which were causing weird shadows no matter where the trio looked.
"This is creepy," Gus hissed in Shawn's ear as they passed the life sized display of Muscum Falls' first pioneers. "We're probably going to die in here."
"Gus, I'm not going to let you die," Shawn gave his friend a reassuring smile. "It's not like Jessica has a gun to shoot us with."
"You really are very smart, Mr. Spencer."
The lights turned on and Shawn turned to see Jessica standing behind them, gun in hand.
"Very smart, but also very, very stupid." She smirked, tightening her grip on the gun.
"Shawn? Gus?" Ryan's voice echoed through the halls. "I saw your car outside. I just remembered who I saw with the gun two nights ago. It was…" he trailed off as he rounded the corner.
"Let me guess, it was Jessica," Shawn said dryly.
"Yes!" Ryan exclaimed. "You know that I've always wanted to be in a Mexican standoff."
"This isn't one," Gus rolled his eyes. "She's the only one with a gun." He was now realizing that the woman of his dreams was a murderess.
"Just like when she shot Mark," Shawn added.
"Mark was different," Jessica gave a smile at the mention of Wilkens' name. "He knew a little bit too much about the money I was making from selling things. Plus, he flipped out on me at the motel last week."
"He wanted to end the affair," Shawn wasn't sure how they were going to get out of this, but if Jessica was talking then she couldn't shoot them.
"Nobody dumps Jessica Miller," Jessica declared, glaring at them. "He felt guilty about the affair after two years of meeting at that motel."
Shawn was about to prompt her to continue to finish the story when Gus' phone rang.
"Don't answer that," Jessica turned the gun on Gus.
"I'm just going to silence it," Gus held up his hands and slowly reached for the phone in his back pocket.
"If you pull out that phone I will shoot you," Jessica promised him.
"Juliet is going to wonder where I am," Shawn pointed out.
"And she'll keep wondering."
"What are you going to do?" Gus frowned. "Shoot all of us? It won't take a genius to figure out that it was you."
"Which is good, because once we're dead there's just Lassie to solve the case," Shawn chimed in.
"True story, there once was a man in Guam who solved his own murder," Ryan added.
"Shut up," Jessica yelled, firing a shot into the wall beside the trio.
OoOOoOOoO
"Gus isn't picking up either," Juliet was agitated as Lassiter maneuvered the jeep through the backroads of Muscum Falls.
"There's another gun in the glove box," Lassiter didn't take his eyes from the road. "Assuming you've kept your license to carry up to date."
"I didn't think you would have given me the choice," Juliet found the Glock tucked between the county maps and owner's manual for the Jeep.
Lassiter pulled into the parking lot at the museum, immediately spotting Guster's ridiculous blue car that he'd bought after the grocery store business took off.
"You take the front, I'll go around back." Lassiter instructed.
"They probably just forgot to turn their phones back on after watching the five minute documentary on Muscum Falls," Juliet whispered to herself as she headed for the front entrance.
The museum wasn't technically open for business with the sale pending, but the front was unlocked and Julie proceeded slowly with Lassiter's glock in her hands.
The emergency lights cast odd and weird shadows along wall. Towards the back of the museum Juliet could hear Ryan's voice talking a mile a minute.
OoOOoOOoO
Lassiter found the side door unlocked and slipped in. The backroom of the museum was nearly empty and Lassiter quickly headed for the door that would lead him to the rest of the building. He could hear Bainsworth's grating voice jabbering from the other side. Stealing himself, he threw open the door and burst through.
"No seriously, I worked with Tito Jackson's former doppleganger," Ryan continued. "We worked at Busch Gardens."
"Sheriff's Department, freeze!" Lassiter yelled, he was behind the trio of incompetent yahoos and aiming directly at the gun in Jessica Miller's hands.
"Freeze!" Juliet's voice echoed as she came upon the group.
"Congratulations, Ryan, you're now part of two-thirds of a Mexican Standoff." Shawn half laughed.
"A New Mexican Standoff?" Ryan mused.
"Shut up!" Lassiter and Jessica Miller shouted at the same time.
Juliet took the few seconds of confusion on Jessica's part when Lassiter shouted with her to act. She slammed herself into Jessica's side, sending the other woman into a ¼ size replica of Muscum Falls. Papiermache flew everywhere as Jessica screeched about police brutality.
Lassiter hauled her to her feet and snapped on the cuffs. "Juliet Spencer isn't a police officer, she's a private investigator. A damn good one." He gave Juliet a warm smile and then took Jessica out to the jeep, reading her rights the entire way.
"Did he just compliment us?" Shawn was shocked as Juliet came over to him, tucking Lassiter's gun in the back of her belt.
"He just complimented me," Juliet smiled. "You're welcome by the way."
"I would have taken her down in a few minutes," Shawn assured her, putting an arm around his wife's shoulders.
"With what?" Gus snorted in laughter. "Your hair product?"
"A woman in Idaho once used hairspray as mace when she was attacked by a bear outside her home," Ryan chimed in.
"Ryan," Shawn put his free hand on the man's shoulder. "I think you need a vacation, buddy."
"For at least six months," Gus agreed. He glanced at his watch. "Shawn, this is why running a grocery store and investigation doesn't mix. The store is probably falling apart without me."
"Yeah," Shawn agreed as they headed for the parking lot. "You should have picked an easy profession, like pharmaceutical sales."
"Easy?" Gus scoffed. "Do you know how many ointments and pills you have to memorize for that job? No thank you."
OoOOoOOoO
It had been a week since Jessica Miller had been arrested for the murder of Mark Wilkens. She was being held in the Grand Rapids detention center awaiting trial. Lassiter had gone back to his usual grumpy self.
"Sheriff," McNab's voice broke into Lassiter's thoughts just after ten in the morning.
"What?" Lassiter snapped, looking up to see a blonde woman standing at the doorway. She was holding a brochure and looked very serious.
"Sheriff Lassiter, my name is April MacArthur and I believe that the fish in the Muscum Falls river are being poisoned." She hurried over to his desk.
"Ms. MacArthur," Lassiter sighed, opening the top drawer in his desk. "The Sheriff's department is not able to investigate supposed eco-crimes." He pulled a business card from the drawer and handed it to her. "I suggest you take this up with the Spencers."