One night, a couple of months after that crazy week in June Pepper gathered the Avengers at the kitchen table after the children had been sent to bed.
"The school term starts in a few weeks. Are you going to send Pip to school?" She directed this question to Clint and Natasha who were sitting to her left.
The assassins hadn't thought about this but no surprise showed on their well-trained poker faces. "No." Clint's voice was firm. "It's too dangerous,even if nobody knows who she is." Natasha agreed.
"That's what I thought you would say. " Pepper soothed. " In that case, Philippa will have to be homeschooled."
"Homeschooled?!" Came the collective response.
"By us?" Tony questioned skeptically.
"Yes." Pepper frowned at her husband's lack of faith. "I don't see why not. I know Pip will more than likely grow up to be an assassin or at least an Avenger and won't need half the crap she'll learn but she deserves a relatively normal childhood."
"So what's your plan." Steve asked, all business.
"Well with such a range of talents among us, I was going to allocate subjects and then make a timetable. Obviously when someone is away on a mission or whatever Pip will miss that lesson or get taught by someone else." Pepper opened a small blue notebook and began to read from the list she had prepared. "Steve- Art." He nodded. His birthday gift was just a small example of the work he could do.
"Bruce- Science." It was an obvious choice. Bruce was, after all, a scientist as well as a superhero. Tony however, wasn't happy.
"Why can't I teach science!" He whined. Pepper sighed- she knew this would happen.
"Your teaching Math." She placated. "And anyway, you can't be trusted in a lab by yourself let alone with a 5-year-old in tow." Seeing the truth in her words, Tony accepted this grudgingly but wasn't going to lose that quietly. "Can I at least teach the tech subjects in Middle school?" He had done a good job explaining things to THor and Steve so after a nod of approval from Natasha, Pepper wrote it in her notebook.
"I have Nat down for P.E and Clint for foreign languages but you'll probably share the two. I have no idea who is better at languages." Pepper admitted.
Clint nodded and Natasha asked him. "How's your German?"
"Nicht schlecht." He answered and they launched into a quickfire conversation in German. After a few minutes of rapid outbursts that left the rest of the team confused Natasha paused with a puzzled expression on her face. Clint gave a cry of victory on mimed shooting her head. It would have been funny to see him acting so childishly but everyone in the room knew a hesitation like that in the field and Natasha would have a real bullet throw her skull.
"Your helicopter is full of what?" SHe asked Clint.
"Eels." He explained.
"Because that makes sense." She grumbled.
"I fly helicopters and with all the fucked up situations we've been in having it full of eels isn't that strange." He defended. She grunted in response.
"So does this mean Legolas is teaching German?" Tony asked.
"Yeah." Clint confirmed. "I don't think there's much point in having P.E. as a subject though considering the amount of training Pip does each day." The team agreed.
"If I teach English, Nat can take reading. Thor, I;m really sorry but the only subject left is Music." Pepper apologized to the huge blonde man.
"That is not your fault, Pepper." He understood. " I am not here for great lengths of time with business on Asgard and visiting Jane it would make me a bad teacher."
" I don't suppose any of you are musical?" Tony asked, jokingly. He didn't expect any of them to have time for such a time consuming and useless hobby.
Clint and Natasha shared a guilty look. "I can't sing." Natasha admitted. "And play the piano."
"I play the guitar." Clint added. The team stared at them with open mouths. They had lived with the couple for six years but still the assassins surprised them. Tony threw up his hands, exasperated. "And when did you learn these skills? In the middle of a mission?"
"S.H.I.E.L.D. base." Natasha corrected. " I broke my leg and had two chest wounds when I started learning piano. For some reason the doctors wouldn't let me train and I had nothing better to do. Clint had a dislocated shoulder and 3rd degree burns when he picked up the guitar. It's a good cover on missions."
"You should her Nat sing. She actually had one man in Apeldoorn drooling. I managed to shoot down the targets bodyguards without him even noticing." Clint smiled at the memory.
"Will you sing for us, Natasha." Bruce asked.
She smiled. "Maybe one day." That was as good as a yes from the Black Widow.
A.N. If you're wondering, Clint said "Not bad." in German. Or at least google translate told me that was not bad. And "My helicopter is full of eels" is genuinely the only phrase one of my friends knows in German. More soon- I just need to type it up and tweak it a bit.