Everything just seemed pointless from this point on

As if there was nothing worth

Nothing to look forward to

But I couldn't have been more wrong about that

People, don't get me started on people. I hate people, people are cruel greedy, selfish people. I never bothered to talk to people, never bothered to ask anything of anyone. Not even my own family. Well the only family I had was my mom, but even she wasn't really much of a mom that she was supposed to be.

When people think of a mom, they think about a caring woman, one that is sweet, one that looks after he children, one that makes cookies, and plays with their little girl's. That wasn't what I thought a mom would ever be.

My mom was what you would say, gives herself to earn money. I didn't really know my own father because truth be told neither did she. I lived in a small one room torn down broken apartment with my 'mom'.

It wasn't always like this, I used to live with my grandma, she was a sweet old lady, that owned lots of cats, and collected stuffed animals. I spend my childhood well the first 5 ½ of my childhood with her. She had this heart condition, if it wasn't for the condition she would probably still be alive right now. She died right in front of me, slowly, first it sounded like she took a deep breath but she wasn't it was the sound of her last. Then she lay on the floor, next to the cat pillow, but she was just slowly dying. She reached out and pet my face and pointed at the door. I did as I was well told, I ran out the door not knowing what was happening to my dear grandma, I yelled for help then I ran back outside. Then I noticed something in her hand. She was holding a match, I tried to stop her but the moment I reached her it was too late she had dropped the match and the fragile wood flooring soon lit on fire all of her cats ran out of the house, I stood there in fear, watching all the stuffed animals burn and saw the sadness in my grandmother's face as I saw her burn. I didn't know what to do, the person that raised me, decided to burn my childhood and herself before my eyes.

Everything I had loved, literally everything burned before my eyes. The only family I had left was her daughter, my mother. I didn't understand, why she would burn everything. And leave me with a mother that doesn't even know how to take care of a child let alone herself. Then I say that life had it's ways to ruin a childhood. From that day on I had to learn to take care of myself, take money from my mother in order to buy food, because she was either out selling herself to random men, which was most of the time, or drunk and half asleep on her crappy bed, in her while took what she earned in order to survive.

I once witnessed what she does for a living, and I noticed that that man, I've seen him take his two little girls to the school I go to, they were around the same age as me 6 and the other 5. And I would see there mom pick them up from school, she was such a pretty lady, she sounded to caring. And for him to just go and do this to his little girls, made me realize something. That you can't trust anyone,, wither they raised you with all there heart, made you smile, or make your day. They are just all selfish greedy people. They don't care about other people, as long as they get what they wanted.

I was surprised that as I got older I didn't turn into the whore my mother had become. I kept myself closed up to other people, because I know that people aren't really what they seem.

I thought everyone was would hide behind a false mask,

But then he proved me wrong.

And showed me not everyone, lies.