Willow knocked on the door to Giles' place. It bothered her. She had tried the door and found it locked for the first time since she had known the watcher. Being kicked out had stung, but being kept out, forced to beg entrance, was far worse.

The door swung open and Giles considered her. He didn't step aside or invite her in. She swallowed.

"I know I should have come to you earlier. I was so wrapped up in getting my life back on track."

"No excuses, Willow." Giles took a deep breath. "You have a responsibility to the Council if not to your friend. You would have told me immediately if any of the other girls was cursed, yet Buffy has suffered for three years without so much as a peep from you."

"I know." She wrung her hands. "Something is off with me. I had no part in the curse, but it's affecting me. I need your help."

"Let the little witch in, Ripper. There might be something to learn from her after all."

Willow swallowed as Ethan Rayne came in to view. What the hell was going on? She was out here begging and Ethan was on the inside. It didn't track.

"Come in, Willow." Giles stepped back to allow her entry. "Keep your voice down. Buffy is sleeping."

"What? Why is she still asleep?" Willow looked up at the two older men. "It's half past three."

"Our girl went on a slaying bender." Ethan smiled fondly. "Christmas, Boxing Day, all those bloody feast days, and she was out there doing her duty. Found her this side of death yesterday. She'd just finished off a nest of Bulgar Harpies. Made quite a mess of herself."

"She was out there slaying for days?" Willow looked to Giles for confirmation.

"Buffy wouldn't have survived if we hadn't found her. The catacombs are full of vermin both demonic and everyday. They would have eaten her alive. She was too weak to walk." He took off his glasses and began polishing them. "We must break this curse."

"Then we need to do a spell to see how many spells are actively working on her." Willow swallowed. "Because I'm pretty sure there are some at work on me and Dawn. I think someone has been working on us for a long time."

"Explain." Giles sat forward and stared at her intently.

"Well, Xander isn't as angry or as cruel as Dawn. He's just not caring about Buffy the way he should. I think it's because he's in Africa most of the year and not so easy to locate."

"The boy's nature might be naturally kinder than Dawn's." Ethan shrugged.

"No," Giles sat back rubbing his chin. "Xander isn't naturally sweeter than Dawn, but there are other possibilities. It's worth examining."

"I'll do the spell." Ethan stood up and smoothed his pant legs. "It's easy enough to verify this theory. If there are multiple spells working on the witch, we will check Buffy."

"Why Buffy?" Giles pulled his glasses off and started polishing again.

"I find the compulsion to slay interesting. There's nothing in the spell that should result in that behavior." Ethan smiled. "But compulsions do reveal so much to the observant eye in some cases quite literally."

"Ha, bloody, ha." Giles grinned and shook his head.

Ethan smirked as he left the room.

Willow looked away. This whole situation felt wrong. She was Buffy's go to girl, her best friend, and, now, she was standing on the outside while Giles and Ethan Rayne of all people protected Buffy.

"Giles, is there anymore soup?" A familiar voice echoed from outside the room. "Buffy's hungry, well, willing to eat."

Willow turned. It couldn't be. She froze as he came into view, barefoot and unshaven.

"Oz?" Willow took two steps toward him. He looked tired and rumpled.

"Hey." He held up his hand in a quick greeting.

"I didn't know you were planning a visit." She smiled. "It's good to see you."

Oz nodded at her, rolled his shoulders, and turned to face Giles, cutting off any possible conversation.

"Soup?"

"On the stovetop." Giles smiled. "Take her some of the cake Ethan made. She might eat it."

"Ah, chocolate." Oz's lips quirked to the side. "Worth a try."

He left without looking at her again, without a word to her. His bare feet padded across the carpets as if he had lived here for years.

"He's here to help Buffy. I called and he came." Giles stood and touched her shoulder. "Don't make a fuss."

"Don't make a fuss?" Willow turned and looked up at Giles with her fists clenched at her sides. "He barely acknowledged my existence. I used to be his everything."

"But, he was never yours despite the drama. Let this go, Willow." Giles said softly.

"He was. He was everything to me." She stomped her foot. "I loved him."

"You loved the idea of him and you loved having someone special of your own, but he was never your everything. If he had been, Tara would never have been able to interest you." Giles stared at her for a moment. "She was your everything."

His lecturing tone became a drone in the background of her thoughts. No actual words got through. Even his patient tone blurred beyond recognition.

Pain lanced through her. Goddess, how she missed Tara. Every day was hard, every day was mourning. The peace of just sitting beside her and reading a book was better than anything she'd had since Tara's death.

Kennedy was a fine sexual partner, but they had little else in common. Their relationship had been born in high drama, but now it was a convenience. She'd been planning to break it off after the holidays.

Maybe, after Buffy was okay, Oz would consider spending some time together. It wouldn't be Tara, but it would be nice.

"You must see that?" Giles stared at her expectantly, so she nodded.