Fire Baby Chapter 5, a mortal instruments fanfic

Author's Note: I don't really like putting Author's Notes above or below the chapters of my fanfictions or stories, but I wasn't quite sure for people are following this story get notified by the updates of chapters, so if not, chapter 4 is now longer and updated. If you do, sorry about the several updates, was having some technical problems, but it's all fixed now! Hope you like it! On with the story!

CHAPTER 5

The back of my chair is hard and digs into the spine of my back. Jace sits beside me, quiet contemplating his life, sometimes glancing at me; looking at my red hair, my green eyes, my small bulge of a stomach that is hidden by the material of my black dress that is tight around my middle, and lastly my lips.

We're sitting within the main room of the Silent City, waiting for the Silent Brothers to be ready for the ceremony. Not caring about the risks, I reach out and grasp his warm hand. He jumps slightly at my touch but smiles at me warmly. I hold my breath as I bring his hand towards my stomach, gently resting it against the tight skin of my belly. He gasps but I breathe a sigh of relief as no bursts of energy are released from Jace to me.

He smiles at me, squeezing my hand. Leaning forward, I allow my lips to brush his gently. Instantly I want more but with a pout of my lips, I resist and pull back to settle with looking into his golden orbs. The ones that soon will be behind his eyelids and golden eyelashes; the ones that I hope to see once again.

'If you are ready, Mr Herondale,' Brother Zachariah whispers into our minds. No matter how many times I hear the Brothers' voices within my mind; it still sends shivers down my spine. 'We are ready for you'.

Not feeling the need to let go of each other, Jace and I stand with our hands still laced together and as one we walk to where the Silent Brothers have prepared for the ceremony of Jace's death and return.

I try not to think of it as his death, I try to think about the positive thought that he will hopefully come back to me and his baby.

If you would just lie down on the table here, the Silent Brother gently instructed. Jace's hand slipped from mine and in that instantly, I felt the coldness and emptiness against my palm, the craving my skin yearned for of Jace's hand in mine.

He glanced sadly at me, his lips drawing up at the corners slightly, trying to relieve me from the concern that hung heavily on my shoulders. It didn't help.

'This may sting a little but the pain won't last long.' The brother spoke softly, understandingly. I hadn't been told anything about the procedure, so I had no idea how any of this worked. All I could do was sit and wait. I wasn't sure how well my words would work right now, they seemed to catch in my throat. I couldn't even get 'I love you' past my lips, my mouth was clamped shut as if cement was holding it together.

I watched as tip of the needle slid into Jace's skin, right above his heart. His eyes never left mine and when the eyes that I knew so well disappeared behind his eyelids, the words that I so badly wanted to whisper finally burst free, too late, "I love you."

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One of the other Silent Brothers had brought me a chair to sit in, another had explained that in about an hour, they would insert another needle which would hopefully have Jace's heart beating again and will have hopefully lost the fire inside him. The liquid that was within the needle, which also made Jace's heart stop, contained a liquid that would act as an extinguisher and douse the flames.

Now I sit with my head in my hands, waiting. It has almost been an hour when I feel a flutter within my stomach. Instinctively, my hand flies to my stomach, feeling the flutter come again. I gasp involuntarily, and Brother Zachariah turns his unseeing gaze on me.

It's kicking, he tells me. I gasp again, tears springing to my eyes. Suddenly I hunger for the touch of, Jace's hands on my belly, feeling as our baby kicks his palms softly. Brother Zachariah turns to the table behind him and lifts one of the syringes. It is time, Clarissa. He informs me.

I stand as the tip is buried into Jace's flesh, right above his chest. We wait in silence, me with my breath caught in my chest and Brother Zachariah with his head bowed slightly.

Five, ten, fifteen minutes pass and Jace's heart still hasn't begun to beat. I wait, my spine stiff. Half an hour passes and dread begins to bloom. Another half hour makes it an hour and we are still waiting on his heart to beat and his eyes to open. Only it doesn't…

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Brother Zachariah lifts his head and in my head I hear him sigh sadly. 'Clarissa Morgenstern, we will leave you to give your goodbyes.'

"What?!" my head snaps up suddenly, I feel my neck crack. "No, no, we can't give up now! He can't be dead! He-he-no… no… this can't be happening." My knees feel weak as if I'm about to collapse, I can feel the flutter in my stomach, more intense than before, sweat beads along my spine and forehead, my breath comes out in small outbursts, gasps more like. My vision is blurry with tears, spilling over my cheeks, cooling down the burn of my blood in my cheeks.

Brother Zachariah leaves without another word, leaves me with my emotions, which may not be such a good thing. I stumble over to the table where Jace lays; silent, motionless.

I lace my fingers through him, no longer needing to fear the fire that used to burn inside him. Tears splash onto our woven fingers, staining his hands. "Oh, Jace…" I whisper. I run a hand through his hair, across his temples, down his jaw, along the outline of his lips, down his neck, across his collarbone and finally resting over the spot where his heart used to beat in time with mine. Leaning down, my small belly brushing against the wood at the close contact of the bench, I press my cold, tear stained lips to his soft, motionless ones where no breath disperses anymore.

Where my hand lies on his chest, I feel a soft thud. I pull back and stare at Jace's lifeless face. Another thud, and another, beginning to become faster and stronger. I call out for Brother Zachariah and in a minute he is by my side, his fingers fumbling at Jace's throat, feeling for his pulse which the Brother confirms as a good sign. I breathe a sigh of relief, letting my hand stroke my stomach.

I see his eyelids flutter and then his golden eyes are looking up groggily. His eyes meet mine and for a second we just stare. He lifts one hand and brushes away my tears.

"Hey." He whispers, his voice hoarse.

I laugh with relief and happiness while tears pour down my face. "Hey," I reply and crush my lips to his.

With amusement evident in his voice, I hear Brother Zachariah leave with, 'Be careful, Clarissa, Jonathan will still be weak.'