CHAPTER 4 - NOT SO ITSY BITSY
Getting to know the author - On the Halloween before the first Scream movie, I wore the costume that would be used in the film. Unfortunately, all the other kids laughed at me and called me an Animaniac. Being the ungrateful little bastard I was, I sarcastically thanked my mother after school. She didn't take it well. Anyway, here's that damn fourth chapter.
Tobuscus' "Wheew!" was cut short by the image of a purple haired girl with a large red bow in the back. As the image only lasted a moment, those were the only details they could make out. Naturally, this stopped the trio in their tracks.
"V-Ellen?" Viola asked herself, stunned.
"Wait." Tobuscus requested. "That's Ellen? So she's a ghost and a witch at the same time?"
"I don't think so." Viola answered. "If Ellen died, the magic surrounding this house would fade. Besides, she wouldn't dare hurt me. She needs my body, right?"
"Makes sense." Gabuscus replied. "Why ruin a vessel that you'll need to survive?"
Viola nodded. Tobuscus looked confused.
"Why am I just now hearing about this?" he asked in irritation.
"You got bored and wandered off, remember?" Viola asked back.
"Oh, yeah. That does sound like me. So, would you mind telling your little story over again? I promise not to walk away again. I'm too scared to be bored."
After about two minutes telling her story and another twenty convincing the men that this apparition was nothing to be afraid of, Viola led the way upstairs. The second floor hallway consisted of one door to the south near the far end, another door right across from that, a door at the far wall, and another near the stairs on the north wall.
About halfway down on the north side of the hall stood an ominous looking suit of armor holding a spear. Right next to him stood Gryphon. This presented a problem. No one wanted to take a step toward their save point.
"Oh! Are you worried about this thing?" Gryphon asked, looking at the armor. "It's fine. He's harmless."
"You sure about that?" Gabuscus was more than a little suspicious. "Getting impaled is not on my to-do list."
"It's on mine." Tobuscus interjected, receiving looks from everyone else. "What? It's how I wanna go. It's even in my will. I'm to be impaled should I be on the brink of death with enough time for someone to find an object with which to impale me."
"Dibs!" claimed Gryphon and Gabuscus simultaneously.
"I doubt you'll live long enough to do that, poochy."
"I doubt your steroids will last you until then."
"Don't make me come over there and punt you!"
"Come at me, bro! Oh, right. My friend over here scares the poop out of you."
"Hey! I'm armed with a thirteen-year-old girl and I'm not afraid to use her." he picked up Tobuscus as he said that. "Umm...where's Viola?"
"Can you please save our progress?" she asked, having walked over to Gryphon during the quarrel. She was now petting him.
"Done." Gryphon complied, then looked back at the men. "Was that so hard?"
"Unbe-friggin-lievably!" Tobuscus responded, getting a confused dog look from his shih tzu. "You gotta put yourself in our place, man. We're sick of dying."
Gryphon looked over to the stairs where a black cat was sitting as if waiting on someone. The two exchanged nods. He then looked at Viola.
"Viola?" he asked. "Could you come downstairs with me? We need to talk."
The blonde simply nodded and followed the house pets downstairs, leaving the men alone.
"No!" Tobuscus cried out. "Our save point! We'll be stuck here forever! God mother flipping dangit!"
Gabuscus put a reassuring hand on his friend's shoulder. "It's okay. I have an idea. Remember old video games where you would switch off after each death? I think that as long as one of us can stay alive, we won't lose any progress."
"So if one of us dies, the other one just has to stay alive long enough for a respawn?" Tobuscus cheered up a bit.
"Exactly. So let's be careful about this and we'll be fine. Let's start by going over to that note."
The pair walked over to the far door, which was locked. Tobuscus read the note. "'Save the butterfly.' Seems simple enough. We should split up and check these two rooms here."
"No. I was thinking more along the lines of one of us walking into a room while the other one waits outside until the first person either dies or says that it's safe."
"Pfft...that's boring! Besides, what are the odds that we'll both die at the same time in different rooms?"
Gabuscus sighed and groaned. "Fine. Whatever. Do what you want. I'm going in here." he said as he walked through the south door.
The south room seemed a bit out of place and pleasant compared to the other rooms. The blue walls would be beautiful if not for the numerous cobwebs. Two display counters with glass covers in this room housed several model bugs, including a blue-winged butterfly. Unfortunately, Gabuscus couldn't remove the cover, but figured that this model would be important to solving this floor's puzzle. Just to his left lay a small hallway.
This hallway branched off after only about ten feet. To the left was an old dirty bookshelf with an out of place piece of scrap paper that read 'rope in a barrel'. The other way turned a second corner which led to a cleaner bookcase. The case was fully packed except for an empty space that would fit one book, maybe two. Figuring there was nothing he could do here, Gabuscus left the room.
While all that was going on, Tobuscus went to explore the room right across from the one his friend entered. Almost immediately upon entry, he screamed and jumped back several feet at the site of a ghost to his right. Upon further, very nervous investigation, he learned that this ghost was having trouble tying a few books together.
Glad to get away from the ghost, he decided to check the eight bookcases for useful information. He learned that keys don't unlock doors in this house and that the house changes based on the witch's magic. There was a short story on one shelf labelled "A Funny Story". Oddly enough, Tobuscus found the story rather depressing. However, a spirit sitting in a nearby chair found it hilarious. The laughter that erupted spooked the green-shirted goof, causing him to stumble backwards and fall, knocking down a few pieces of paper off another shelf.
Looking at the papers, an article caught Tobuscus' eye. It read as follows:
'XX/XX: XX Residence Burns Down
XX and his wife XX were found dead among the wreckage.
The bodies were found to have stab wounds, so it is suspected they were murdered and the building then set ablaze.
Additionally, XX's only daughter Ellen (currently 7) has been missing since the fire.
The police-'
"Hmmm...why does it cut off there?" Tobuscus asked himself. Deciding that he did all he could for this room for now, he walked back out to meet with Gabuscus. It took a couple minutes to exchange information.
"Is it just me or is something off about the article and Viola's story?" Tobuscus asked.
"It's not just you. Something doesn't sit right with me, as well. That article you showed me is six years old. No one could leave a little girl alone for that long. Anyway, we should finish this floor before we waste any more time." Gabuscus suggested. They began to walk over to the north room by the stairs.
"Sh*t! It's moving!" Gabuscus screamed as he hid behind Tobuscus. The two kept screaming and hiding behind one another until they backed into the locked door. It took a few moments for them to notice that the armor moved away from them and down the stairs. Chuckling a bit at the unnecessary freakout, they headed to the one unexplored room on the floor.
This room was very dimly lit. Black walls surrounded the dark gray floorboards. A thirty foot hall led a room where several barrels were scattered about. Coming out of the hallway and to the left, Tobuscus read yet another sign.
"'The spider has poor eyes. He can't even tell colors apart.' This should be easy." he said as he set his eyes on a butterfly caught in a large web in the opposite corner.
Gabuscus was busy looking through the barrels. After looking through five barrels, he finally found the rope he was looking for. "Okay. Looks like we got what we came for." he said, holding up the rope.
"Okay. The butterfly has been saved. Let's go!" Tobuscus said, holding up the butterfly. This made Gabuscus' jaw drop.
"What did you do!?" he yelled. "Rope...book...shelf...model...butterfly...GIANT F**KING SPIDER WITH BAD EYES! HOW DID YOU NOT CONNECT THE DOTS!?"
"Woah, potty mouth. Calm down. First of all, connecting the dots is for children."
"You are a child! In the f**king head!"
"Stop that! Secondly, if I did screw up, we would've been killed already."
"Hmmm..." Gabuscus thought about it. "Maybe the trap was to solve the puzzle. Of course. Make the solution so obvious that no one would try it. It's actually pretty smart. Hell, let's get going." he set the rope down as they headed toward the door.
"I knew you would see it my way." Tobuscus said with a smug grin. "Sometime the best solution is the most obvio- hey! This door won't open. Gabuscus?"
He turned to see his purple-shirted friend, now headless, fall over. Looking up from the body, he noticed eight huge beady eyes locked onto their next meal. He didn't even have time to scream as the monstrous spider lunged in for the kill.
The next thing he felt was something hitting him hard in the face. The next thing he saw as he fell back onto the floor was the left fist of his furious friend. Trying to calm down, Gabuscus spoke.
"Wait here. You are so lucky we didn't get much done." he said while pointing menacingly. He then proceeded to retrieve the rope from the spider room.
They walked into the ghost room together to give him the rope. He, in turn, gave them The Book of Death, which Tobuscus wanted to read badly, but was denied permission. They made their way to the display room and then the bookcase. An idea then hit Gabuscus.
"If we put this back now, we're both gonna die. Hey, Tobuscus, would you like to read this book?"
he asked, holding the book out like an offering.
"Would I?" Tobuscus asked as he snagged the book and opened it. He quickly began yawning and rubbing his eyes. "Man, this is boring. No (yawn) murder tips. No violence. Nothing fun at all. It's boring me to dea-" he fell over, having just died of boredom.
"Had to be done." Gabuscus said as he picked up the now closed book and placed it on the shelf. The sound of sliding glass could be heard from the display cases. He took a few cautious steps in the direction of the noise. 'Okay, so far, so good.' he thought. 'Just a little furth-' "GAH!"
A skull about the size of Tobuscus came from around the corner and gave chase. It was pretty fast, but Gabuscus was faster, and just about at the door when it opened suddenly and knocked him down, allowing the skull to be begin devouring its latest victim. Tobuscus stood in the doorway.
"Worst book ever." said Tobuscus as he casually walked over to the butterfly model, completely oblivious to the giant skull and the screams of his friend. Just as he picked it up though, he noticed that the skull just ended Gabuscus' life and had its sockets set on the new meal in the room.
"Stay back!" he yelled, throwing the model, which shattered on the skull's forehead. "Whoops! Um...that was completely unavoidable."
Tobuscus, like his newly revived friend, was too fast for the skull. He easily got past the skull and closed the door behind him. To his right was a smiling Gabuscus, unaware of the shattering of vital puzzle pieces.
"Good. You made it out." he said. "Now let's swap the butterflies and get out of here."
"Yeah. About that, Gabuscus."
"First name: Gabe. Last name: Buscus. Try thinking of it that way."
"You sure do. Anyway, funny story, and totally not my fault. You see-"
"You broke the model, didn't you?"
"Well, when you put it that way, I sound like an idiot, but I guess you could say that..."
(A black eye, four shattered ribs, six teeth, and one minute later)
"Hey! Spidey!" Gabuscus called out as he pulled the butterfly from the web. "Chow time! It's your favorite, Arachnid Kibbles 'n' Idiot!
"Why!?" Tobuscus asked in sheer horror while trying to break free from his friend's death grip.
"Because that skull disappeared after you closed the door, so this is the only way we can start over." Gabuscus sounded more annoyed than pissed. Apparently, beating Tobuscus up was somewhat therapeutic. After the spider took a second helping of our heroes' heads, they returned to the suit of armor.
After a few minutes, the pair arrived at the same point as before, this time being successful in retrieving the model. Once more, they found themselves in the spider room.
"Now can we save the butterfly?" Tobuscus asked.
"Now we can save the butterfly." Gabuscus answered. "Hey! Put the model in the web! I want to walk out of here with my head intact!"
"Oh, yeah, right. This thing." Tobuscus put the model in the web, then ran for the door. Without warning, a hole opened up in the floor near the door. He tripped over this hole and ran smack into the door. He would have fallen backward into the hole had Gabuscus not caught him.
Once they were out the door, Viola, Gryphon, and the black cat came back up the stairs. The butterfly flew out of Tobuscus' hands and into the locked door. With a click, the door unlocked and the path to the next floor was open.
"Wow." Gryphon said, somewhat amused. "What oddly convenient timing."
"That can't be a coincidence." said Gabuscus.
"I don't care it is or not." Viola said, sounding more irritated than she was before going downstairs. "We need to get moving...now. The sooner we get out, the better." She then hastily walked off to the third floor. Shrugging their shoulders, the men decided to follow. Tobuscus remembered to save just before he made it to the door.
After three humans left, the black cat looked at Gryphon. He spoke in a deep raspy voice.
"It was a mistake trusting those guys, dog. They won't suspect anything, and will thus condemn an innocent girl to her eternal doom. When that happens, you'll share her fate."
Gryphon chuckled at this. "They're a bit smarter than they let on. They'll see through everything, undoing all the suffering you caused over the past six years. Ellen's been acting suspicious and contradicting herself this whole time. I'm sure they at least know that something's not right."
"If you want to be overconfident in those fools, be my guest, but know this, Gryphon. Your faith will be your end."
"Drama queen!" Gryphon sounded bored. "You're boring me. (See, told you.) I'm gonna go see how they're all doing. You coming?"
"Sure. I could use a good laugh. They are an entertaining bunch."
"That's the one thing we agree on."
And with that, the two pets left to catch up to their humans. What did they discuss with Viola? Why is Gryphon's soul at risk? Does he have a history with the black cat? Find out next chapter as we delve into their backstory.
AN: I appreciate all those who have read the story so far. Updates will be at random, when work isn't kicking my ass. Next chapter will be far more serious, but should still have enough lols.