A/N: Soooooo sorry about the long wait. Went to NY on vacay and came back lazy :( at least its better than the eons of stories I followed that I'm still waiting for an update for like 3 or 4 months ;/ anywhoo here you go & as always please voice your thoughts or concerns...I can handle it 0.0

Chap 8

Tori

My heart was heavy as I turned away from her and headed back to my house. She told me she loved me and I walked away. Why? I have no idea. Maybe I'm stupid or something. Maybe I like punishing myself. Maybe I deserve this life I'm living. Do I really? I can't even answer that. If she hadn't shown up when she did I don't know what would've happened. I don't even want to imagine what would've taken place. That bastard deserves to rot in jail for all I care. I made my way to the closet that held the cleaning supplies and began to clean up the mess. I know my parents are going to want to know what happened I just don't know what their reaction will be when I tell them. I don't even know what to tell them about her, if I even wanted to tell them about her. I got up and headed to the kitchen to throw out the broken glass. I put everything away, washed my hands and walked out to the living room where I am greeted by the frosty glare from my father along with my mother in tow. I sighed and grudgingly made my way over to them choosing a seat across the room. I sat down and started fiddling with my fingers. I might as well get this over with.

"So I guess you want to know what happened" I began. I exhaled heavily and continued. "Well I went out with my friend for my birthday and when I got back Ryder was here waiting on me I guess…"

Flashback

"Welcome home fiancé. I trust you had a fun-filled night?" the shock I experienced at seeing Ryder here is nothing compared to the fear that is threatening to cripple me. I tried to play it cool.

"Ryder what are you doing here? My parents aren't here you know."I hope he didn't notice the shakiness in my voice.

"Oh I'm well aware of that sweetheart. You know I saw you at that club last night grinding up on that pretty bitch. What you're into girls now? Men don't do it for you?" He inched closer to me. Every fiber in my being is telling me to get out quick but my brain isn't communicating that to my limbs.

"Did you let her fuck you huh? Did you fuck her too?" He stared at me menacingly. "Ahh the silence I'm getting right now answered my questions. So tell me Tori do you expect me to marry you to get some pussy while you're freely giving it away? It doesn't work like that bitch!" I backed up to make a run for it but he somehow grabbed on to my hair and flung me across the room into the table smashing the glass vase atop it. The impact knocked the wind out of me but at least the table still stood intact. I opened my eyes to see him advancing towards me. I tried to get up but he pounced on me and slapped me across my face. I blinked rapidly to try and dim the stars that were flashing across my eyes. "Stupid bitch! I'm going to teach you a lesson. You don't fuck over Ryder Daniels ever!" He pulled me up by my hair and dragged me up the stairs. My voice suddenly returned as I register exactly what he has in store for me.

"Please Ryder don't do this! Please!" I sobbed uncontrollably. If only I stayed with Jade and let her explain this wouldn't be happening to me. I panicked once he reached my bedroom. I started swinging my arms wildly at him. He used his free hand to grab a hold of my wrists. "Let me go Ryder! Please don't do this" I cried. He released the hold on my hair to pull my shorts and underwear down. He swiped his foot behind my legs causing me to fall to the floor bringing him on top of me. I wriggled my body and tried to move side to side to get him off me. I screamed as hard as I could. He quickly clapped his free hand over my mouth to dull the sound. I attempted to knee him in the groin but that earned me another smack on my already bruised cheek. "Shut the fuck up and be still before I knock you out. I would think you want to be awake to enjoy this don't you?" His ugly sneer brought on an onslaught of fresh tears. I can't believe my day is turning out to be this shitty! I felt him rip open the top of my shirt exposing my breasts. He harshly took my nipple in his mouth and bit on it. His hand muffled my pained cry. He placed his weight on me so I was unable to move while he freed himself from his pants. He eased himself up so that he could try to penetrate me. Just kill me now please I pleaded in my mind. I don't want to experience any of this. I closed my eyes and tried to separate myself from the present moment. I was back at Jade's house lying next to her admiring her beautiful smile. She was running her slender pale fingers over my stomach and… the thud of boots and a painful grunt brought me back to present…

Tori

"…the the police came and took him away and here we are now." I told them the edited version of the truth. I mean it was the truth I just left some of the Jade stuff out. I glanced in my dad's direction; his expression revealing none of his thoughts. My mom is just sitting there with some unknown expression on her face. He got up suddenly and marched over to where I was.

"Victoria you expect me to believe Ryder tried to take advantage of you? You probably threw yourself at him like a common whore! You really want to sully our name in the church community? I insist that you drop this ridiculous claim immediately so he can be released! You are so selfish! You just want to get out of your commitment to him and for what to get with that…that abomination?! Oh I saw the way she was looking at you and let me tell you this I will not accept this in my house do you understand me?" I was stunned to say the least. I just told him I was almost raped and this is the reaction I get. The anger bubbled up inside of me.

"Are you fucking serious right now? I told you that asshole almost raped me and that's what you think? Why would I ever throw myself at that scum? He disgusts me. I never wanted to marry him in the first place!" I couldn't stop myself once I started. Everything I kept inside erupted like a volcano. "You are the worst excuse for parents ever. Since Trina died you have become monsters! I denied myself a life just to keep you happy and you know what I've had enough of your shit! You think that what you do makes you better than everyone else? You think it's going to grant you an access into heaven? You think you judging other people make you favored in the eyes of God? Well it doesn't ok." The look on his face was well worth me blowing up. I turned away from him to address her. "Mom I know you don't like to talk about it but it was an accident. Trina and I were playing with each other and I pushed her I didn't see the oncoming car and neither did she. I loved her more than anything and I never meant for any of it to happen and I would never intentionally hurt her. I'm tired of feeling guilty about it. It happened years ago and I'm ready to let it go and I hope you do too." I turned to go upstairs only to hear him yell after me.

"You are no longer welcome in this house and don't even think I'm going to be giving you any money."

"Frankly dad I don't give a shit and I don't want your money. I have my own and a lot of it too. Oh and yeah I'm a lesbian and Jade's my woman and I fucked her good. What do you think about that huh?"

I didn't wait for his response. I ran upstairs grabbed my duffel bag from the closet as well as my important stuff that I kept hidden and stuffed it in my bag. I grabbed some clothes jewelry and my makeup kit l and dashed downstairs. I picked up my purse off the floor where it fell earlier and took one last look at my parents and walked out the door with a smile on my face. I didn't know where I was going but anywhere would be better than here. I hope Jade would forgive me for what happened today. I should've listened to her. I took out my phone and dialed her number. It went straight to voicemail. Crap figures. I decided to drive to her place. I pulled up in her driveway about 20 minutes later but I didn't see her car parked. I sighed heavily and threw my head back on the seat. All my pent up emotions decided to show up then. I cried…and cried. I was so mad at myself for everything. I don't even know how to fix this. I sobered up a few minutes later and decided to drive over to Robbie's. It wasn't a very long drive to his place but with my mind elsewhere it seemed like I got there in record time. I got out my car and went up to knock on his door. He opened it a few seconds later.

"Tori hun…" he paused as he took hold of the look on my face. He turned my cheek so he could look at the bruise. He was the only person that knew of the beatings my father sometimes gave me. "Oh love come inside" he said as he ushered me in and closed the door. He enveloped me in a hug and I forced myself not to break down once more.

"Not him this time" I muttered in his shoulder. He pulled back and looked at me questioningly. "It's a long story."

"Good thing I'm a great listener and I have nothing but time. Tell me everything spare no details." We walked over to his plush loveseat where I spent the next half an hour telling him everything that happened editing of course the intimate moment between her and me.

"Wow Tori I am so happy that you found Jade and I'm even more happy that you stood up to those ghastly people you call parents but you shouldn't have let her walk away I really hope that you guys can work this out. Have you even told her how you feel? "No I haven't. I screwed up big time and now I don't know where to find her or how to reach her."

"Why don't you just get some rest Tori. You had quite the traumatic day and you can't keep going like the energizer bunny. Even he runs out of steam at some point. You can try to find Jade tomorrow maybe Beck might know where she is." Oh I totally forgot about that. He did mention that he was dating Beck. I got up and took a well needed shower and went to into his spare room where I found my duffel at the side of the bed. I smiled and picked out some clothes got dressed and sank into the soft bed. I wonder what Jade is doing right now. I hope she knows how sorry I am for today. I hope I can get to her. Those were my last thoughts before I drifted into a deep sleep.