Disclaimer: I'm just playing with Suzanne Collins' characters and her world. They're hers. Not mine.
A/N: Thanks to everyone reading this little disaster, and as I said in my other set of stories, double thanks for reviewers. Y'all are the best.
The Talk, pt 7, or That's Not How That Works
Madge had just left the library, picked up a book of music, when she heard her name. She'd just barely turned her head when a small body slammed into her, little arms wrapping tightly around her middle, nearly knocking the air out of her.
"Posy!"
Mrs. Hawthorne came chasing after her youngest child, looking a little flushed.
"I'm so sorry, Madge. She just took off."
Giving the little girl a squeeze, Madge smiled, "Oh, it's okay." She patted Posy on the head, "How are you, Posy?"
Posy bounced back, beaming. "I'm great. momma and I left Haymitch's and we took some laundry to Mrs. Everdeen and Prim and we went to the store and bought some material for a new dress for me and momma said if there's any leftover we can make a little one for my doll an-"
"Posy! Slow down." Mrs. Hawthorne pulled her daughter back to her. She flashed a quick smile over to Madge before giving her daughter's pigtail a tug, "Why don't you go over to the sweet shop and pick something out for you and your brothers."
The fact that she apparently has extra money for such a luxury as candy is a hopeful sign to Madge that she's being well compensated for her troubles with Mr. Abernathy. Being in charge of cleaning his house is a monumental task, the fact that she hadn't thrown up her hands and fled yet was nothing short of a miracle.
In a blink the little girl has grabbed Madge and begun pulling her toward the shop. "Come with me."
Her mother unlatches her hand from Madge's wrist. "No. You go by yourself, just stay where I can see you, alright? I need to talk to Madge."
Madge has the sinking feeling that she knows why she wants to talk to her. It was the event that never wanted to end.
She'd already had to discuss horrible things with her mother and Mr. Abernathy, which she feels is punishment enough for a lifetime.
Posy looks annoyed for a minute, but the draw of sweets is too strong, and she decides she'll talk to Madge soon enough. After she gets her candy, of course.
When she's safely out of earshot but still in her mother's sight, Mrs. Hawthorne sighs.
"Madge, I just wanted to apologize for everything the boys have put you through lately."
Quickly, before anything further can be said, Madge forcefully shakes her head, "It's fine. Really."
She really didn't want to have this conversation with Gale's mother.
"No," Mrs. Hawthorne's color darkens. "I found the, uh, gifts your housekeeper gave Gale."
Madge feels the color drain from her face. Not the flavored condoms!
"I'm just so sorry the gossip mill got a hold of it. Rory just can't keep his mouth shut when he thinks something is funny, and embarrassing Gale is his favorite pastime." She shakes her head, her cheeks brighten, "And for that woman to imply that you…I'm just sorry."
A nervous giggle escapes Madge's throat. Despite being a politician's daughter, she panics, begins babbling almost involuntarily. It's so embarrassing.
"Really, it's okay. I mean, we know I wouldn't do that. Gale and I aren't together." Wait. "Not that I would do that if we were." Wait? What was she saying? "I mean I would." What?! Oh, god. She knows she needs to stop talking, but her mouth can't stop forming words, drizzling them out in an embarrassing non-confession. "I mean, I could, I know ho-no! I don't-I don't know how, I could figure it out, though. Not that I would need to, I mean I would, I could. There's nothing wrong with it, if that's what someone lik-"
Mrs. Hawthorne places a hand on her shoulder, silencing her.
An all consuming dread fills Madge. Had she just told Gale's mother she would perform fellatio on her son? No, she'd just told her she'd learn how to. She isn't sure which is worse.
She can feel her heart beating uncomfortably fast and her cheeks warming. She's such an idiot.
"Madge, honey, it's okay. I wouldn't, um, well, whatever you would or wouldn't do isn't any of my business." She looks a little uncomfortable with the direction the short conversation has taken.
They stand in a very uncomfortable silence for several minutes before Madge sighs.
"Uh, thanks, Mrs. Hawthorne. I'm sorry Mrs. Oberst did that to Gale." He has enough to deal with without having to be given unwanted prophylactics by a hateful old woman.
Mrs. Hawthorne wrinkles her nose. "Gale didn't have to keep them, either."
She opens her mouth, not really certain what to say to that.
Have you seen your son? He was just saving them, because, let's face it, he'll need them eventually.
Yes, that's certainly the way to make her surely tarnished image shine.
Nodding, Madge keeps her eyes anywhere but on Mrs. Hawthorne. She can't keep her mind from wandering to the fact that Gale's mother had full knowledge of what Vick had asked of her, and the thought makes her a little queasy.
They're both saved from having to talk, though, by Posy once again rushing them, squealing with delight.
"Look what I got!" She hoisted a fairly large paper bag up, opening it enough that Madge could see several large chunks of chocolate in it. "He gave it to me for free."
Mrs. Hawthorne's brow wrinkles, not really certain why the shop owner was suddenly feeling so generous. "Why?"
Oblivious to her mother's questioning look, Posy rattles on. "He looked out and saw you and Madge and said, 'Oh that poor girl. You're brother just can't keep it in his pants can he? Now she's knocked up' and I said 'What?'. Then he gave me free chocolate!"
Her eyes narrow as she looks at her mother, "Nobody told me Gale and Madge were knocked up." Her little mouth turns down, "I thought you said Gale couldn't have the sex with Madge, momma? That's how you get knocked up, isn't it?" Eyes widen as she looks to Madge, "Gale's gonna be in big trouble."
Mrs. Hawthorne's hand shoot up to her mouth and she lets out a little gasp. She looks, horrified, to Madge.
Suddenly Madge feels Posy's little hands press to her stomach as the girl lets out a high pitched little squeal. "Oh! Hi, baby!"
"Mrs. Hawthorne, I am notpregnant," Madge assures her. It's not even the remotest possibility. "We aren't doing anything, I promise."
Why does this keep happening?
Mrs. Hawthorne nods, "I know, I know, I'm so very sorry,Madge." She snatches Posy's hands back.
"But momma, I'm pattin' Gale's baby!" Posy struggles against her mother, reaching for Madge's abdomen.
Silently Madge prays no one walks by.
Frantically, Mrs. Hawthorne whispers, "Posy, there's no baby in there."
Posy stops, turns and tilts her head. "Did Gale put it in the wrong spot?" She frowns over at Madge, "I heard Rory say Gale wanted put it between your lips, did he put the baby in your mouth by accident?"
Madge's face is a ball of flames, she can't even respond. Mrs. Hawthorne appears equally mortified.
Oblivious, Posy continues, "I wouldn't worry, as long as you swallowed, I bet the baby made it into your stomach. It just took the long way since Gale didn't use your pee-pee hole to put the baby in."
Both Madge and Gale's mother are caught between absolute humiliation and breaking into horrified laughter at Posy's innocent understanding of how pregnancy worked.
Madge makes a strangled little noise before managing to sputter, "Posy, Gale and I aren't doing anything that would make me pregnant, alright?"
"Don't you like Gale?" Posy's little lip just out.
A little sting hits Madge's heart. "Of course I do Posy. That-"
"Then have a baby with him!" She brightens considerably. "You can use your bed to put the baby in cause Vick said you were too good for the slag heap, and they said your bed is nicer than Gale's." Her wide eyes turn to her visibly flustered mother, "Please, Momma! Let Gale put a baby in Madge!"
She looks back at Madge, "I want you to have a baby, Madge. I could dress it up and comb its hair and feed it…"
She's off rambling about all the things she's going to do with Madge and Gale's nonexistent baby while her mother and Madge stand open mouthed with shock and listen.
Mrs. Hawthorne covers her face with her hands as she mumbles, "I don't know what's wrong with all my children. I promise you, until recently, none of them have been obsessed with that or the results of it."
While Madge is fairly certain Gale had more than a passing interest in that far before recent events, though not as much as the rumors would seem to indicate, she knows Mrs. Hawthorne is being honest about her other children. At least Vick and Posy.
Rory is a completely different story.
"It's okay." Madge forces a smile. She's use to being gossiped about. Like she told Gale, it's simply how they're portraying her that's shifted.
"I just can't seem to rein them in."
Somehow, Madge isn't shocked. The Hawthornes seem, to her to be, a very willful bunch.
Seeming to sense there was no way to salvage the conversation, Posy was still carrying on with her chatter, Mrs. Hawthorne picks up her daughter.
"We'll just be getting home." Her lips pull up into a strained smile, "Really, I'm sorry, Madge. If you need me to have the boys do anything about these rumors, seeing as they pretty much started them, please let me know."
Posy protests, reaching for Madge, making one last effort to convince her to have a baby with Gale.
"Please let Gale put a baby in you. You're so pretty, and Gale's handy-some, and I'mpretty, and momma's pretty, and your momma is pretty, it'll be so cute!"
#######################################
When Gale walks in, bone weary and sore, he immediately knows his mother is in an odd mood.
She looks like she's going to say something, puts her sewing project in her lap, but is cut off by Posy jumping the floor.
Delighted to see Gale, she runs at full speed and flinging herself at him. He catches her and hoists her up into a hug.
"Gale! Guess who we saw?"
Judging by how his mother cringes slightly, he isn't sure he really wants to know.
"We saw Madge!"
Well, this won't end well.
Gale's gaze flickers to his mother, her expression wary, he knows whatever comes out of Posy's mouth next is going to stir trouble.
"Did you put the baby in the wrong hole?"
That was not what he was expecting.
He stares at her. "What?"
She sits back on his hip, puts her tiny hands on her sides, "Did you put the baby in the wrong hole? With Madge. During the sex." She gives him a lofty look, "The man at the sweet shop said you couldn't 'keep it in your pants' and knocked Madge up, but she said she wasn't pregnant. It goes in the pee-pee hole. I heard Rory and you talking about putting it in her mouth and that's too far, it needs to go in the hole closer to where it comes out."
Her arms cross over her chest and she lifts her chin, thinking she's telling him some very important facts.
For a few painful seconds he just stares at her, dumbfounded. Why can't his siblings have developed a sudden interest in horticulture or bird watching? Why his bedroom activities?
While he's glad his sister hasn't reached the point that she really understands what she's said, it's all just words and a vagueness, the fact that she'd heard enough of he, Rory, and Vick's conversations to put that much together, is a little disconcerting.
"Uh, okay, I'll keep that in mind." As he smother's his brothers for being such loud mouths.
Posy nods, "Yeah, so next time you have the sex put it in the right place. I want a baby." She pauses, her eyes widen, "Maybe you should stick a baby in Madge's butt too! Then we can have twobabies!"
Oh, god, no.
Gale doesn't even know what to say to such flawed and yet brilliant logic.
His mother chokes on her water.
"Posy, no," she rasps between coughs. After several seconds of trying to regain her breath she mutters, "I have never been so embarrassed."
"But I want a baby." She juts her lower lip out, bats her eyes, "Please, Gale?" She leans in conspiratorially, "I'm even getting momma to say you can use Madge's bed when you put the baby in."
Great.
Because that's what all the trouble was really about. Location.
She sits back grinning, certain she's just secured herself a new niece or nephew.
"Posy, no. Gale and Madge aren't having a baby. Get down and go play."
Making a face, lip jutting out in a pout, Posy lets Gale set her down, then drags her feet as she goes back to her spot by the couch. Gale notices she's taken all her dolls and sat them around her. She gathers them up, gives her mother a hard look, then stomps off to the bedroom.
"She's practicing," his mother shakes her head when she sees he's noticed what his sister has sat up. "For when the baby comes." She sighs. "Poor Madge."
Gale feels a twinge of annoyance. Poor Madge? Poor Gale. He's the one dealing with his increasingly hormonal brothers and their wandering, filthy, imaginations and the creeps at work who, though they've let up some, still occasionally ask him how banging the Mayor's little princess is. He's the one having crazy housekeepers push condoms on him in the middle of the store. He's the one losing sleep over dreams of lingerie and smooth skin then having to go work in the mines every day.
Now his little sister is trying to use him as her own personal toy maker, with the toys being his unborn children, with Madge Undersee.
"Madge is just fine." She'd said as much herself. In fact, she'd seemed amused by the entire thing.
"She has most of the District thinking she's let you get her pregnant." She gives him a weary look. "I assure you, she probably isn't really okay."
Alright, he does feel a little bad about that. His brothers had started this mess after all, but Madge was smart, and had surprisingly thick skin. If she needed his help he wouldn't hesitate to give it, but he doubted she would require it.
"Well," Gale frowns, popping his neck, "she's not pregnant and in nine months when no baby comes they'll all know it."
She nods, "And youwouldn't get her pregnant either."
Gale feels a little irritated. Does she not think he's good enough for Madge either?
His wounded ego beats out his lethargic mind, and before he can stop himself he's saying, "I couldget her pregnant."
His mother's eyebrows arch up, "I'm so glad to know it." She presses her lips together, "I meant you have more sense than to do that."
Cringing, he nodded. He was tired and jumping to the wrong conclusion. "Sorry."
He certainly wouldn't get her or anyone pregnant now. Two boxes of flavored and ribbed condoms would make certain of that.
She gives him a faint smile, "I know, honey. I just wish people had something better to gossip about. Neither one of you deserve this."
With a faint smile, Gale starts to tell her about Haymitch's wild disease rumors, he really should let her know before someone else does, when the door flies open.
Rory and Vick stumble in, carrying an empty laundry bag behind them.
Gale frowns, "Where have you two been?"
His mother hadn't done laundry since the whipping, there was no reason for the two of them to be wandering around with the bag.
"We had to make a delivery." Rory tells him, tossing the bag to the corner.
Gale gives his mother a puzzled look.
She wrinkles her nose. "Haymitch had a collection of shirts that belonged to the Mayor. The Undersees apparently have a stock of clothing for his exclusive use when he passes out at their house and they want to send him home in something clean. He told me Madge came out once a month to gather things up and get them cleaned, so I laundered everything and sent it back so she didn't have to." A small gesture considering her children had almost single handedly smeared the girl's name. She gestures to Vick and Rory, "They just dropped it off for me." She leans forward and mouths the words, 'I didn't want Posy making contact again'.
Fantastic.
Knowing that was a dangerous move, his mother narrows her eyes at the two boys. "You behaved yourselves didn't you?"
Vick nods.
Rory begins laughing, "Vick asked her if she shaved."
"Vick…" His mother presses her fingers to her temples.
"What?" He looks genuinely confused. "It's a hygiene question. Not a sex question."
Rory grins at Gale, whispering, "The answer is 'yes', if you're wondering."
He was, but he really didn't need to know.
"You said no sex questions. I just asked about shaving. And doctor questions."
His mother frowns, her eyes tired, "Doctor questions?"
Gale has the sudden, unfortunate realization he knows what's coming next.
Vick nods, completely serious. "Yeah, I asked her if pelvic exams hurt. The medical book had a diagram, and they showed them inserting the spe-cu-lum and doing the swabs, I guess you know about all that, 'cause you're a girl. Anyway, that thing is all metal and looks uncomfortable. I was just curious and I've never seen you go to the doctor and she's from Town and all, so I figured she would know." He takes a long breath, "I asked if they really feel for the ovaries when they palipate, palp-it-ate her stomach and I asked her if she ever had felt for her cervix, 'cause the book said some girls can."
His brow wrinkles, "She didn't tell me. I think doctor visits might traumatize her."
Gale bites back telling Vick that his visits probably traumatize her.
Their mother slumps down a little, arms on the table.
"Vick, sweetie, you cannotask girls those-"
"You're home!" Posy comes racing out of the bedroom, one of her dolls dragging behind her.
Gale hopes her short attention span has caused her to forget their earlier conversation. Heaven help him, he doesn't want her telling Rory about how she assumes twins are created.
He should've known better, he just isn't that lucky.
"Did Madge say anything?" She asks them expectantly.
Probably 'leave and never come back'.
Vick frowns, "About what?"
Their mother makes to stop her, but Posy is young and quick and has the words out before she can stop them.
"About having a baby with Gale!"
Both Vick and Rory stare blankly.
"She isn't having a baby with Gale." Vick looks perplexed.
Rory shrugs, "According to the rumors I've heard at school she is."
"You knew about that rumor?" Their mother's mouth drops. Rory never shuts up, him not mentioning it, especially to annoy Gale, is baffling.
"Well it's not true," Rory rolls his eyes. "She's outta Gale's league. That's what I keep telling everyone, even though that's pretty obvious. He wouldn't even get close enough to her to get her pregnant."
Gale slaps the back of his head.
Rory rubs the spot, "What?"
Posy puts her hands on her hips and glares at Rory, "What do you mean he won't get close enough to get her pregnant? Gale and Madge are going to have a baby."
Rory arches his eyebrows, "Unless Gale's some fertility god, he's about as likely to put a bun in that oven as he is of going to the Capitol."
"I want them to have a baby," she told him. As though that settled things.
"They aren't having a baby," his mother groans.
Posy ignores her, "I want two babies!"
Vick huffs, "You don't get to just decide to have two babies, Posy."
She shoots him a snotty look. Gale lunges out, tries to stop what he knows is coming, but he, like his mother, is too slow.
"Uh-huh! Gale just has to put one in her butt. It's a lot closer to her stomach than her mouth." She informs them loftily.
Damn it.
The room is silent for what seems to be an eternity. Then Rory makes an inhuman noise before dissolving into laughter.
"Yeah, Vick." He gasps, "Gale just has to put it in her butt. Obviously."
Vick's nose wrinkles, he's an expert on female anatomy at this point, and he's trying to work out how exactly putting anything in that particular orifice would result in pregnancy. He pales a little as he finally realizes what Rory means.
"Rory!" Their mother stands, hands in her hair. "Don't-we-don't-"
Gale closes his eyes. He needs to make a trip to the loose board in the shed later.
If his kids are going to be anything like his siblings, he's going to start wearing condoms twenty-four hours a day.
He can't handle much more of this.