Hephaistion unpacked his bag, laying out the two chitons he had brought with him on the bed, then reached for the dagger and the hemlock, placing them on his pillow. He fetched out his comb, a red chlamys and finally his own red cloak, patched as it was, unlike the new one he had been given for the journey.
He lifted up the cloak now, feeling its warmth and he closed his eyes, brushing his hand along the fabric and thinking of the past.
When he opened his eyes he looked around, seeing a chest in a corner of the room, he lifted up the lid of it and placed the cloak in the bottom of it, then took the hemlock and hid it in the folds. He placed a chiton on top of this, closing the lid and standing up, taking off his cloak and stripping naked, kicking off his boots before using the towel to dry his hair and his body.
A fire had been lit by the servant who had shown him to his room, who had chattered on as he made sure all was well before bowing and leaving him alone. Hephaistion placed his damp chiton by it to dry it out and then lifted the heavy, rain soaked cloak and lay that alongside it watching steam rise from the fabric.
Turning, he took the remaining chiton and put it on, feeling warmer for it, then he sat on the bed, lost in thought.
He had declined the offer of a bath sensing Perdiccas' interest was more than friendship and not wishing to encourage the man.
Standing up, he went to the window and looked over to the tree covered hills. Aegae seemed a quieter place and he relished the peace of it. The rain was stopping and he felt the urge to go and explore, the palace sat on top of a hill, the city below it. He looked up at the sky to see the sun break through the clouds. Reaching for the red chlamys he put it on then pulled on his boots, taking the dagger and hiding it inside his right boot before making his way out of the palace.
He had only just left the palace when his name was called and he turned to see Alexander striding towards him while telling his guards they were not needed. Alexander was putting on a dark blue chalmys held in place by a gold brooch engraved with the Star of Macedon. He came forwards like a lamb going to the slaughter.
Hephaistion shifted his weight, feeling the dagger brush against his leg. He called on his years of training to see him complete his task, there was enough distance now, from the guards, so that he could not be stopped. He stepped forward thinking to reach for the dagger.
"Alexander!"
A young boy came over, running towards them, Hephaistion stepped back as Alexander laughed and swung the boy in his arms before holding him. The boy had a wooden sword and held it proudly, he had dark brown curls and a good complexion and smiled happily at his king.
"Still practicing with your sword, Tithaeus?" Alexander asked, then smiled to Hephaistion. "Are you going in to the city?"
Hephaistion nodded and began to walk with Alexander, listening to the conversation he was having with the boy.
"He's going to be my bodyguard," Alexander said.
Tithaeus waved his sword and gave a high-pitched roar, attempting to give the paeon as a soldier might in battle. He was unaware he had already done his duty.
They turned left and walked along the side of the palace, Tithaeus wriggled free of Alexander's arms and ran ahead, swiping at an invisible enemy, looking back for approval.
"His father was killed at Chaeronea, he fought bravely and deserved all honours given to him. His mother has remarried and lives here at Aegae now but I think Tithaeus will be a soldier like his father," Alexander said.
"The best way, to be a soldier," replied Hephaistion. He looked over at Alexander and began to understand why he was followed with such loyalty.
"Joy to you, Alexander." The greeting was echoed by three others as some veteran soldiers walked by.
"Joy to you all. How is the leg, Deinocrates?"
"I'll be glad when summer comes again," said one of them, a stout fellow with a greying beard, slapping his right leg as he passed by with his friends.
"He was wounded in Thracia. He can still fight well but each winter the leg pains him more," Alexander informed him.
"Do you know all their names?" Hephaistion asked.
"Not all but I value them all the same," replied Alexander, halting for a moment and then turning to the theatre, signalling for him to follow.
Tithaeus would have come with them but a woman, perhaps his mother, called out to him. He looked for the king, as if he might be able to delay his leaving but Alexander only smiled and shook his head. "Obey your mother," he said.
Hephaistion noticed a certain hesitancy in Alexander as he stepped in to the theatre. Preparations were being made for a play but here, though people acknowledged Alexander, they also seemed to understand he needed to be left alone.
Alexander walked to the centre, his pace slowing, his face lost in thought. "Here, my father was killed," he said softly, as if it might not be true if the words were whispered. His grey eyes looked to the ground, distracted, lost in the past."
Hephaistion recalled Diomache saying this would be the perfect place to kill the tyrant. But here was no tyrant. Here was a king. "We cannot control the Fates...we might think we can...but we can't. What is done is done and what will be will be," he replied, then folded his arms and turned away. He would not kill Alexander. Sparta's golden days were long gone, it was time to let another have it's chance to shine. With Alexander, Macedon would rise to glory. He looked back and smiled softly to him.
OOXXOO
Hearing Hephaistion's words Alexander looked up and saw the smile and felt as if a dagger had pierced his heart, as if the breath had been taken from his body. He hardly knew the man, had hardly spoken to him and yet it was as though he had been waiting for him all his life.
"You have a chance to do as you want now," Hephaistion said.
His mouth had gone dry, he could not stop looking at Hephaistion, all he could do was nod.
"They say Spartans say nothing." Hephaistion turned once more.
"Follow me," Alexander said, almost like a prayer.
He turned away and headed down the road which would take them to the town, his heart beating faster as he realised that Hephaistion was walking with him. A Spartan. He loved a Spartan. He wanted to reach out and touch but he was not even sure Hephaistion felt anything for him, perhaps, if anyone, it was Perdiccas who had won his heart. Perhaps there was someone in Sparta he would return to.
"What family do you have in Sparta?" he asked, looking to Hephaistion.
"A few cousins, an aunt." Hephaistion pressed his lips together, bit his lip.
"No mother or father?"
"My father died when I was ten years old and my mother two years after but in Sparta all are meant to be your family."
Alexander thought back to when he was ten years old, how he would run to greet his father when he returned from campaign, feeling safe in his strong arms and treasuring the moments when his father would talk about the battles he had fought, when they would look at maps together, when his father would be proud of him.
"It hurt to lose my father when I was twenty, to lose a father when you are ten..." He let his words trail off.
"We're taught to welcome death."
"We're taught to stay alive," Alexander replied.
They came to the bottom of the hill and turned left along one of the town streets and as people greeted him Alexander wished he were not a king right now but a man able to take his chance easily. His choices mattered now and as a king he had to be wary of the reason people wanted his friendship and as a king he thought rejection would come harder. His mother always said he should be alone; his mother was planning the wedding, picking the girl for him. What if Perdiccas had told Hephaistion that he would be married? What if Hephaistion had assumed he loved her?
Turning right they came to the site of his father's tomb, it was almost complete, the two chambers inside had been built quickly so that his ashes could be placed inside but outside work had gone on to show this tomb was for a king. With a smile to Hephaistion he stepped under a canopy where an artist was working on a painting.
"I chose a hunting scene...my father and I hunting," he explained to Hephaistion. "Things were not always easy between us, he was not always sure of my love for him and I sometimes resented him, sometimes I made mistakes and angered him but when we were hunting, then times were good. On campaign they were too...anywhere away from Pella. He deserved to go to Persia not be slaughtered as he was."
"Everyone had high expectations of me, it had been so long since a son had been born from Leonidas' line. My father was proud of me, determined I would do well and sometimes he would forget I was just a child simply needing a father's love. After he died I decided to be the best I could, to honour him."
Alexander smiled. "Careful Hephaistion, for a Spartan that was a speech."
Hephaistion laughed, gently. "They used to say I should be an ambassador."
"You chose the cavalry?"
"So did you. You will understand the need to do something different to your father...than a famous ancestor."
"I understand," Alexander replied.
Without thinking, Alexander stepped forward and embraced Hephaistion then found himself never wanting to let go. The scent of the man filled all of his senses, the strength and beauty of him. He kept promising himself a moment more to feel Hephaistion's face against his hair, to allow his fingers to wrap around the chestnut hair but it was Hephaistion who broke it, stepping back, his lapis eyes showing alarm as he did so.
"Friends embrace," Alexander said, grasping for an explanation, feeling the pain of rejection.
Hephaistion looked at him. "I know," he said.
For a moment Alexander wished a king had the right to order someone to love them but love had to be earned and love was a plan of the fates, of Aphrodite. He realised he would needed time so decided that on a campaign to win Hephaistion's love, that the resolve he had to win battles would help him to victory in the end.
Alexander spoke to the artist for a while and then reached out and touched the door of his father's tomb. Many were glad he was dead; many wished he were still alive. "He lived a life," he said.
"All men should have such a tomb," replied Hephaistion.
Alexander stepped out from under the canopy and looked up to the sky, the rain clouds had practically gone now, the sun was shining. .