Between Betrayal And Salvation
Chapter 3: Where are you now?
Disclaimer: Shaman King isn't mine, nothing is mine except for this fic and a Lyserg clay doll that I made myself.
Warning: Angst, Yaoi, physical and mental abuse.
Lyserg's reaction was instantaneous. He froze solid and time just stopped.
The rain, previously unnoticed, sounded like a thousand crystal glasses shattering. Yoh suddenly filled his senses: his scent was thick and musky; he tasted like maple syrup and butterscotch; the little noises of their lips pressed together; the sound of everyone's gasps; the heavy gray of the thunderheads; the wind against his skin; the cold where the rain splashed on him; the heat where Yoh was pressed against him.
Lyserg was on sensory overload. It only lasted an instant, but it felt like forever and then he was fighting like a cat. He twisted and jerked beneath the older boy's weight and struggled to free his bound hands, but it was all in vain. Yoh was just physically stronger and the more the British boy fought the more into it the other boy seemed to pressed on. Bile surged up to his throat and his stomach lurched dangerously at that thought. He panicked and did the only thing he could think of.
He bit Yoh's lips.
Blood slipped into both their mouths and the older teen lurched back and yelped, his hands flying to cover his mouth. Lyserg took the opportunity to kick the Japanese boy off him, roll over, and retch painfully. Then he felt something that was even more terrifying than Yoh's kiss and retched anew.
He was aroused. His vision clouded up and his stomach heaved until there was nothing left to come up.
Lyserg automatically wiped his mouth and raised haunted eyes to stare at the winded teen that lay a few feet away grinning like a fool. There was blood on his lips. His stomach lurched again and he scrambled to his feet, backing away. The logical part of his mind tried to regain control of his body, but his emotions were running rampant.
He was shaking like he was going to fall apart and for some reason he really, really, really wanted to start screaming and sobbing hysterically and have a temper tantrum of cataclysmic proportions. The fact that it was his first kiss didn't help make things better. He clenched his hands into fists to stop himself from tearing out his hair. He couldn't stop backing up.
"Y—y—you FREAK!" Even his voice trembled. "You freak!"
Asakura Yoh only grinned.
Lyserg nearly screamed 'Morphine Oversoul' when he backed into something.
It's Horohoro. The rest of the events of the afternoon were a blur, and all Lyserg could remember was grabbing his travel bag, and running faster than he had ever run in his life. He outran the rest of the crews. He outran the aching in his muscles from the fight. The only thing that he couldn't outrun was the throbbing need pooling between his legs. That fact alone was more than enough to make him run faster.
"Lyserg-chan! Come back! We can talk about it!" Ryu shouted and chased after him along with Tokogeroh, he didn't remember his green-haired friend could run that fast. When he couldn't run anymore, he dropped down to the ground and felt confused and helpless. What is he to do when two of his closest friends, one whom he looked up to and another one whom he finds pleasure in protecting and showering him with affections, fell into an awkward situation like this?
''Master Yoh...sigh. Not that I don't trust your judgement but what is going on?'' Ryu weakly asked the unofficial leader of his gang of friends.
Somehow he ended up at home, or more precisely throwing random cash at a cheap motel's owner to rent a room who had given him a bewildered look, a man who looked to be in his middle ages.
Somehow he soothed Morphine until she stopped looking worried.
Somehow he ended up playing chess with her.
Somehow he even ended up showered and in bed by 1.00am. He didn't know how though.
And to make matters worse, the minute he lay down the kiss flew back into his mind and he found himself instantly, painfully, hard. He recited the murder mystery novel that he often read since his parent's death. Nothing worked.
It was 2.00am and he was still hard. He groaned in denial and squeezed his eyes shut.
His resolve didn't relent until 2.37am and even then he didn't dare touch himself. Instead, he closed his eyes and bit his lower lip so hard that blood flowed. Tears of shame, terror, and rage slid down his cheeks nonstop as he relived the kiss over and again.
At 2.53am his hands, previously clenched into tight fists at his sides to prevent them from wandering, clutched convulsive at his sheets and his back arched. He choked back a scream. In his mind's eye all he could see was Asakura Yoh as he climaxed alone and untouched in the darkness of his silent bedroom.
It was 3.02am when he looked at the clock. Sleep was a long time in coming to Lyserg Diethel that night. It was beyond him why he would let a guy make him feel like this. Come to think of it, Lyserg didn't spend enough time to explore his sexuality before. He didn't have much experience when it comes to the opposite gender, or had gone through real dating. So, when he's having these arousal from Yoh's kiss, does that make him a homosexual? Or maybe he's bisexual?
He does admit that Yoh can be attractive in his own ways, well if people can be charmed by the damned Hao Asakura, it does say something about Yoh's charms too, but Yoh isn't the type to flirt around so that makes the difference. Oh Gods, did he just admit that he finds Yoh attractive? Lyserg mentally slapped himself, thank goodness Morphine is sleeping or else she might find out.
Where are you now Yoh…? Why do I even want him next to me on my bed now…? I'm turning into a freak am I…?
Calling out your name
Your face is everywhere
I'm reaching out to you
To find that you're not there
I wake up every night
To see the state I'm in
It's like an endless fight
I never seem to win
I can't go on as long as I believe
Can't let go when I keep wondering...
Poor Lyserg, he is once lost and confused again like he used to when he first met Yoh and the gang. The song above is 'Where Are You Now?' by Britney Spears, I think you can really set the mood going according to this chapter if you care enough to play the song from YOUTUBE.
Do review or comment on this chapter even though I doubt this fanfic attracts enough readers. Arigatou gonzaimasu… ^_^