Ooookay.
I am once again back!
Time sure flies by. Can you imagine? I am posting the sixth chapter of this story!
Despite of the few feedbacks I got and even none at all from the last chapter…(huhu…. *Blows my nose on a handkerchief*,) I am still happy to say that this has been a good first fiction, because I get to write about my most favorite love team of all time! And I'm sure there are many out there who're rooting for our favorite guy Taichi as well.
Someone just came back in this chapter, that someone that I know you've been wondering what had happened to years before. I hope you guys will like it!
VI
Needless to say, there had to be a lot of decisions to be made. Adjustments and decisions. She had never been a stranger to Taichi, but really, after three years of being apart from each other, she had to admit that it felt as if she was starting to know him again. Nothing had changed, (in a major way,) she knew, because Taichi was still Taichi, and she was still… well, she. But of course, they had grown without each other and she had to marvel at the little changes that had happened over the last years.
For one…
"You're tall." She said as she watched the sun setting through the window of his hospital room.
He chuckled easily. "I have always been tall. I have to be or else I can't become a doctor, you know." He was starting to pack his change of clothes, throwing in his toothbrush and towel on the bag that she had brought for him the other day.
She whirled around to him. "But I was always so close to you in height!" Her lips were pushed out to a pout, sighing dejectedly.
"Well, I think it's time for you to accept that I am taller than you now, because I'm still growing." He taunted jokingly, snapping his bag shut with a sharp zip. "Imagine how awkward that would be if you're taller than me."
She gazed at him with her large, dark eyes, as if it was the first time she was looking at him directly. She looked so serious that he started to become self-conscious. "Why are you looking at me like that? It's creepy." He inquired in a nervous voice, flushing lightly and averting his eyes from her.
Chihaya just gave him one of those smiles that could literally light up a whole room. She then moved away from the window and bounded over to him, sighing happily and suddenly wrapping her arms around him, leaning on his chest as she had done countless times before already. Startled, his whole body stiffened and tensed up at the intimate contact, no longer used to Chihaya giving him affectionate embraces.
She had never been stingy with hugs and embraces before, -they hugged and embraced each other each time they won a match, - but he had to admit that being away from her for so long had already made him forget what if felt like being held close by her. It was one of those memories that he had forced himself to forget, -because it had been too painful just remembering them. He had torn himself away from her forcibly that making himself forget all that she had used to do before, -her antics and her smile- had been his survival choice.
"Why are you hugging me all of a sudden?" He asked, trying to sound teasing. "You want Ghana bars, don't you?"
She looked up at him for a second, glaring at him and pillowing her head on his chest again. "Just let me hug you, Taichi. I haven't seen you for three years. I've missed you so much." She muttered, burying her head even more on his chest, nuzzling him with her nose. "Is it just me, or you've gotten thinner?"
There was nothing left to do but wrap his arms around her, bending his head down to rest on top of hers. "Thinner? I doubt that. I may have put on some weight. Comes from not having to worry about someone else all the time, you know." He teased pointedly, but his heart was already starting to pound harder. Praying that she wouldn't notice, he tried to slow his pulse down, even when he knew that he couldn't do it by strength of will.
"You feel thin." She pressed, looking up at him to gaze at him deeply in the eyes. "No kidding."
He huffed indignantly. "I'm not thin. I'm wiry. Athletic." He winked at her, and unconsciously, a red blush spread across her cheeks that he had to stop himself from stroking her cheek gently.
He was not in the correct place to do that, after all. Remembering it all of a sudden, his arms slowly dropped to his sides, letting go of her, his eyes turning downwards again. "We have to go. I have a lot of things to do, you know."
He was an idiot. He couldn't let himself enjoy these things after all. "Already? I thought your mom was coming." She asked quietly, noticing how his mood turned down and releasing him from her embrace.
"What am I, a kid? I can pack for myself and go home." He slung his bag over his shoulder. "She'll be here if she thinks I need her to be here."
Following their reconciliation, Taichi had gathered his courage to tell his mom first regarding his real condition. As to be expected, 'Mrs. Pressure's' reaction had been somewhere between surprise and, - for the first time in a long time, - worried. As a real mom should be for her son. He had to admit, it was the first time he had seen her react like a genuine mom should. He had gotten an earful from her as he had been an idiot hiding it for three years, but he couldn't help but feel glad as this was the first time she had acted genuinely concerned for him at all and not the dictator she had always been. She had gone to his apartment in order prepare his things when he gets home for a short while, and to prepare him for a long stay in the hospital.
Ryuzaki-sensei had allowed him to be discharged momentarily in order for him to be able to apply for a leave of absence from Sodai. His recent medical results showed that he had lost consciousness due to stress and study load, and had resulted to him going deaf with his left ear. It hadn't been too alarming and surprising for him, -he had already accepted his condition long ago anyway,- but it had worried Chihaya, so much to the point that she nearly forgot that she still had school to worry about and which resulted to him giving her an earful to be more mindful of her studies and that, as he had survived being alone for three years, he certainly would be able to survive being alone for a few hours.
"Let's go. I'll take you to your dorm." He said, grabbing hold of her arm and steering her gently out of the room.
Chihaya pouted. "I can't go home yet." She muttered, momentarily freezing Taichi from his tracks. "Erm… You and I can't go yet, actually."
He raised an eyebrow at her. "What's going on? Are you supposed to go somewhere else?"
She opened her mouth to respond but she didn't get the chance to do so as at that moment, footsteps sounded from behind them and a hand gripped his shoulder.
"You can't go yet, Taichi, because I just came." A deep masculine voice, both familiar and unfamiliar, said behind him, chuckling. "Man, I thought I'll never see you again."
He whirled around, recognizing that voice and that Fukui accent anywhere.
A tall man who wore eyeglasses stood behind him, grinning broadly. "Welcome back, Taichi. Finally."
Wataya Arata, grandson of the Eternal Master Wataya Hajime and who, currently, is the reigning Meijin, is back.
Taichi sighed to himself as he turned his coffee maker off and carefully poured the coffee into two large mugs he had placed on the counter of his kitchen. They were already back in his condo unit, and he had thought wryly to himself, Well. Home Sweet Home.
At the living room, he could hear Arata's hearty laugh as he watched from the television that he had opened earlier just to keep the man entertained. Chihaya had conveniently chosen this time to go out and buy snacks for the three of them, and even when both of them practically volunteered to go out instead, she claimed that she had to pass by her dorm as well to get some of her books and of course, her beloved karuta cards.
"I couldn't pass up this chance! Arata just came back, after all!" She had exclaimed earlier, before grinning widely and laughing loudly. "I'll go get my karuta cards. See you later!" she had cackled gleefully, and was out of the place before either of them could even say 'karuta'.
"Sorry about that." Arata had apologized earlier at the look on his face. "You know how she is."
He had turned away from her earlier, not preferring to see how her eyes lit up at the possibility of playing karuta once again. It was not her fault, after all, that he had chosen to drop it years ago. There was no sense for him to go on the defensive just hearing and possibly watching the game again for the first time after three years.
Honestly. That girl…
He took out the table spoon he was using to stir the dark brown liquid from one of the mugs before setting it aside and gripping the mug handles carefully. He trudged cautiously to his living room, and Arata looked up at his direction once he entered, standing up and making his way over to him to get one of the mugs.
"Drink up." He muttered quietly, as if they were holding mugs of beer instead. Arata chuckled in response.
"Thanks, Taichi. You shouldn't have bothered." He said easily and confidently that Taichi felt something twist in his stomach. It was a sensation that he had always felt whenever Arata was there or whenever Chihaya would talk about him, an emotion he only knew too well.
Jealousy.
Now don't get him wrong. He hadn't hated Arata. Not once, even when he knew he had no chance to Chihaya because of this guy. Let us not forget that he had been the one who had introduced Chihaya to karuta and had gotten her addicted to the sport, who had single-handedly gotten for himself Chihaya's attention and won it without even batting an eyelash. Oh, and might he just add, who had beaten him three years ago in the Eastern qualifiers and had gained the privilege of challenging the Meijin, and thus, fulfilling his dream and finally succeeding Suo Hisashi as the current Meijin, -to this day.
No, he had never hated him. Heaven knew how he had tried, how he had forced himself to, because it was easier to stay away from Chihaya if he did. But he couldn't. No matter how hard he tried. Maybe it was because of the fact that their friendship had been built from scratch, an unlikely friendship that developed and started from bullying, -from his part. It was embarrassing, but it was true. The memory of how he had been such a rotten, spoiled rich kid before was something that he had tried so hard to leave behind him in the past.
It was a friendship that had been built from a game, a friendship that had started from the love and fascination of a hundred cards of a hundred poets who had written a hundred different poems expressing their feelings. To this day, neither of the three of them had been able to give it up.
Okay so maybe the three of them excepting him.
"It's no big deal." He responded finally, sitting down on one of his couches and carefully sipping his coffee. "I know how much caffeine-deprived you are. You'll be needing it for your match with the Queen later." He said nonchalantly, turning his eyes to the television to avoid the other man's probing gaze.
Yes, he had never hated him. But that didn't mean he hadn't viewed him as a rival, -in karuta and admittedly, -in love.
The thought made him snort inwardly. Rival? He hadn't even done anything in the past except hide from the woman he had loved with all his being. He hadn't made any risks when it came to her, but stayed with her instead, hoping that she would one day trip on her feet and bump her head somewhere and miraculously finally notice how he loved her even from the beginning. And maybe, if it hadn't been too much to ask for, finally acknowledge him as a man, and not as a best friend. Or best buddy.
Yeah right. That's like her forgetting what karuta is all of a sudden.
"And just like everythin' you do, the coffee you made tastes absolutely good." Arata said, shaking his head in admiration. "Don't you have anythin' you're not good at?"
What the hell? They both knew the one thing he wasn't really good at. Taichi didn't know if Arata was being sarcastic or he was really just as innocent as Chihaya is.
He cleared his throat. "Well, thanks. Glad you liked it." He cast about for something to say." So… How's Osaka? Last time you told me you were selected as part of the few students who will be given training." He was trying to start a conversation, feeling obliged to at least start some small talk. He is practically the host, after all. "I hope you got yourself souvenirs. It's not everyday that you get to go there after all."
Arata snorted, a snort which was so unlike him and sounded so out of place for a quiet man like him. "I don't need souvenirs if you're there to tell me what Osaka is like, ya know."
"You cheapskate. You haven't bought souvenirs because you don't want to spend too much." He concluded, laughter in his voice, turning to grin at the dark-haired man. "Tsk3. Really? I bet you haven't even tried to explore the place more." he teased good-naturedly, wanting to disregard the tension that he knew was starting to make itself felt between the two of them.
"Well excuse me if I wasn't born a rich kid like ya." Arata responded in a teasing voice as well. "Ya know I haven't got that much money, and that I wouldn't be able to go there in the first place if it wasn't an all-expense-paid kind of travel internship."
Taichi looked away from him, his point hitting a little too close to home. Why was it that he felt bad every time him being a 'rich kid' were brought up? Was it his fault that he was born that way, even if he hadn't asked for it?
No. But he knew the real answer as to why. It was because even now, he couldn't forget what kind of a kid he had been before, a spoiled rich kid who had everything in his life but couldn't stand losing to a transfer student who was better than him in so many ways admittedly that he had to stoop so low as to stealing his glasses. No matter how hard he tried to get himself to move on from that childhood incident, it felt as if he had branded himself with it, forming the kind of person he is now.
Arata was looking at him cautiously. "I-I'm sorry, Taichi. I hadn't meant anythin' with what I said." He ventured carefully, not wanting to upset his friend even more.
His head snapped up, looking at Arata in surprise. "What? No. No, it's fine. I just remembered something." He scratched the back of his head as he looked uncomfortably embarrassed.
He watched Arata as the latter stared at the swirling surface of the liquid in his mug. "Sorry for comin' without notice all of a sudden. I had wanted to tell you that I was about to come home and visit you, but Chihaya had wanted to keep it a surprise. You know how she is."
"It's fine. I would expect no less from Chihaya." Taichi said cautiously as well. Somehow he felt as if the tension was really making itself felt now. He knew that Arata was aware of it as well, that unspoken thing that was manifesting itself as a barrier between them.
"How are you, Taichi?" Arata asked in low voice, looking at him straight in the eyes. He knew that this is the first time they would be talking about it again, the first time after three years since they had faced each other in a match. It was a subject that they had avoided talking about before, a subject that Taichi had been more than glad to keep to himself.
"I'm… great. Well, as far as I would like to think so, yes, I'm great." He responded nonchalantly again, lowering his gaze to his lap as he balanced the mug he held on his knee carefully so as not to burn himself.
"You know that's not really what I mean." His friend pointed out, swirling his mug slowly around, again watching the coffee swirl. "How are you, Taichi?" he repeated the question from earlier, this time in a deathly serious voice.
Taichi stared at him a few moments longer, meeting his probing gaze head on. There was no running from it, then. "I'm fine. In all honesty, I'm quite fine. Well, as fine as I can be with a deaf left ear." He said, trying hard not to sound serious and moody about it.
Arata was still looking at him seriously. "What did the doctor say?"
He took a deep breath, leaning back on the couch and dropping his head anyhow on the soft surface on the edge of the backrest. "Well, if I'm hoping to try setting my hearing right again I'll have to take a risk with that surgery. You know how it is. Seventy-thirty chance of the hearing being permanently lost." He said, his head still bent backwards on the edge of the backrest, unwilling to look at Arata, not wanting to see the expression his dark blue eyes held.
"And Chihaya is aware of this?"
"Ryuzaki-sensei had told her. I'm not sure if I should be glad though. I mean I've tried so hard to keep it from her to make sure she'll be unaffected." He sighed warily. "Honestly though, I realized I just fought a battle that was lost even from the start."
Arata cleared his throat self-consciously. "I've been tryin' to convince you to tell her about it, Taichi."
"Why on earth will I even want to do that in the first place?" He was starting to feel guilty again. "You know about Harada-sensei as well, Arata. Do you honestly think she could handle it with both of us?"
Arata was staring at him seriously once again. "I think it's about time for you to stop lookin' at her like that."
"Like what?"
"Like a fragile crystal that would break even in the slightest touch." Arata said matter-of-factly, making Taichi pale a little. "You've been with her the longest time, Taichi. I knew that you knew Chihaya is a strong woman. You know her better than anyone else does. Even better than I do." He admitted in a small voice, turning quiet for a short while. "Chihaya is different than any other girl out there. She's not someone who would leave you alone because she's too weak to stay by your side n' support you."
"I know that, Arata."
"Yes you do." Arata continued. "So now that it's out in the open, what are you goin' to do?"
That was one of the eternal questions wasn't it?
Taichi stared at him, at a lost of words.
He hadn't been planning to let Arata know. Heck, he wasn't planning on letting anyone know. But nothing seemed to have gone his way, even during his high school. Nothing had gone his way ever since he had met Chihaya, and even more so when Arata had come into their lives. Well, not that he blamed Arata for suddenly arriving, -if anything it had been an important eye-opener- but while it had been very useful for Taichi's maturity, he hadn't exactly found it enjoyable to doubt himself for the first time.
There had been a lot of firsts for him from the moment Arata had arrived, but as he had thought before, he hadn't really hated him for it even when he had wanted to do so. Arata had simply been one of the people who had been born with great talent for karuta, and that was not his fault. If anything, no one was to blame even when he knew that the current Meijin held Chihaya's heart in his hand.
Taichi knew that Arata was no idiot. That was why he wondered why he had even bothered trying to hide his condition from Arata of all people three years ago. Really, it was Arata who had first found out what had happened to him, the only other person observant and brave enough to find out what was truly happening to him. He had been alarmed at the news of his condition and had wanted to schedule a rematch, but Taichi had declined, and the committee members wouldn't allow him to schedule one.
And just like back in their childhood, Taichi had asked him to do the very same thing he had asked of him back in their elementary years.
Please don't tell Chihaya about this…
Arata knew it was a mistake hiding it from Chihaya. He had felt that it had been unfair of Taichi to have hidden it from her, but he understood where Taichi had been coming from. He didn't have the heart to tell Chihaya what had been going on with his wayward friend because he understood that he was doing it for her sake. He knew that Taichi had done it to protect her from the knowledge that would undoubtedly hurt her, especially once she realized that Taichi no longer had the chance to fulfill one of his goals.
Yes, he had thought of him as a coward and a proud man, that was true. He had always thought of him like that ever since he had committed the childish mistake of stealing his glasses years ago. But he had to admit, he knew how it hurt not being able to do once again the thing that he had once dreamed of. Of all the things he had to experience, it had to be this. It had to be hearing loss. Arata knew that Mashima Taichi is perhaps, the proudest man he ever knew, but looking at it from a karuta player's perspective, he knew how depressing it had been for him. To a karuta player, hearing is perhaps the most important weapon they had, next to game sense, most probably.
And to have hearing loss in such a young age… Arata could only imagine the depression and hurt Taichi had gone through.
"I'll have to take the surgery." Taichi said finally, once again sipping his coffee. "No choice. Ryuzaki-sensei had already done so much for me. It's quite embarrassing to keep on dilly-dallying with it."
Arata continued to watch his movements, this time, somehow amused. "We have Chihaya to thank, then."
"What is that supposed to mean?" Taichi asked, sounding nonchalant, but really, he was starting to feel uncomfortable. The tension was already there in his shoulders, rolling down his spine, and he knew that the conversation was taking a weird turn, in an area that he wasn't prepared to go in yet.
The dark-haired guy chuckled amusedly. "Oh come on, Taichi. Did you really think I hadn't seen it? You like Chihaya, yes?"
Taichi nearly spat out his coffee. He hadn't expected Arata to just blurt it out like that, with a calm, almost amused expression on his face. Well, he knew it was quite obvious, especially since practically the whole team knew about it except her, but to hear it from Arata, to hear it from his mouth, he couldn't help but feel defensive.
The big, freaking elephant that practically sat between the two of them suddenly got even bigger. Arata was aware of it, of that undefined something that existed between the two of them, the two men in Chihaya's life. And now is the first time either of them had broached the subject.
Well, one of them broached the subject.
Taichi sighed out loud, and looked at him pointedly, before saying something in response. "Really, Arata? Do I have to spell it out loud? What does it matter anyway?" He asked, trying hard not to sound as if he cared about the consequences of finally admitting his feelings to his friend, and at the same time, -rival. "You like her as well, don't you?"
Arata finally had the decency to go red in the cheeks. "Well, yes. Though it was more of love already, don't you think?"
He nearly dropped his mug of coffee. Man, the perks of being childhood friends. So it was 'all bare, no secrets' between the two of them now, huh? What is this, a man-to-man talk?
"You came back to Tokyo for her didn't you?" He asked cautiously, sounding close to accusing. Arata shrugged.
"Yes, one among many other reasons." Arata admitted, noting how Taichi's face drained off it's usual color. "Taichi… heaven knew how much I wanted to be with her. I'm sure you know about this already."
Oh, he knew alright. He knew very well. He was an intelligent man, after all. He had always known that Arata had feelings for Chihaya, just as much as he did for her.
"Yes I do. Of course." Taichi responded, his voice and throat dry. "So what's stopping you from asking her out?"
He is such a masochist. Why the hell did he sound pissed off anyway? Why is it that he sounded as if he was even encouraging him, his rival (supposedly), in the first place?
Arata stared at him, as if trying to say something else with the look he was giving him.
"It's been three years, Arata." Taichi continued, sounding incredibly exasperated, knowing full well the meaning of the look Arata was giving him. "What, you still haven't told her this yet? I was surprised you've let this go on for so long without even telling her anything. I would have thought that you've already asked her to move up a level with you." His amber eyes pinned the other man with an intense gaze, looking at him directly for what seemed to be the only time that they had brought this up. Fine, all things bare, no secrets, then let it all out. "It's not like you need my permission or anything, don't you?"
"I already have, Taichi."
His eyes widened, and all the breath whooshed out of his lungs. He stared at Arata as if he had suddenly grown two heads.
He… had already told her…
Why did it feel as if a bomb just exploded right in front of his face?
"I told her about it around three months ago, before I left for the travel internship." Arata continued, not noticing how Taichi was close to hyperventilating. "It had been all out of the blue, ya know?"
He rubbed his temples, trying to get himself to calm down. He swallowed, unwilling to suddenly back down even when his legs felt as if they wanted to carry him somewhere far, far away. Even though he was actually sitting, his legs felt as if they had been turned to jello. "And I need to know this why?" He couldn't help but ask snappishly, not looking at Arata directly.
Arata was giving him an amused look. "Why are you reactin' like that? You seemed so concerned about protectin' yourself from something. I thought you'd like to hear what had happened."
Was he being sadistic? Taichi didn't need to know of Chihaya's ecstatic 'yes', of her accepting his confession. Dammit, his heart was already beaten black and blue all over. Didn't Arata have enough mercy left in him to keep the happy part of him and Chihaya to himself? Where had the good boy gone to, all of a sudden?
"Okay, you and Chihaya were a couple already. Really, Arata? Did I have to guess what had happened next? Of course she accepted your feelings." He couldn't help but sound sarcastic as well, but inside he was reeling from the information that Arata had just shoved into his head.
His heart was throbbing painfully now.
Arata raised an eyebrow. "… No."
Taichi stared at him, willing himself to understand what Arata was saying all of a sudden. It felt as if he had gone deaf on both ears now, as idiotic as it may sound.
"… What?" He ventured in a confused manner.
"I just said no."
"Care to explain that? You're losing me already with your monosyllabic responses."
Arata sighed deeply as if he had been asked to work overtime on a holiday. "No, Chihaya didn't accept my confession."
Taichi only stared at him confusedly. "…Why?"
"What do you mean, 'why'?" Arata returned the question confusedly as well.
Taichi resisted the urge to slam his head on the nearest wall. He wondered whether he hadn't been talking to Chihaya's male version himself. Really, sometimes it felt that they suited each other more, no matter how painful it was for his part, because the way they think was somehow so alike in some ways that sometimes it scares him already. Two somehow-airheaded friends he didn't need.
"Why didn't she accept your feelings, Arata? There has to be some reason behind it." He asked exasperatedly, unwilling to let himself hope. "Did she even turn you down?"
Understanding dawned in Arata's eyes. Oh, hallelujah. Taichi thought sarcastically to himself.
"Well, she hadn't exactly turned me down. She just hadn't given me an answer yet." Arata said, fiddling with the handle of his coffee mug, suddenly unable to look at Taichi straight. As amusing as it is, Taichi felt that Arata was embarrassed because of what had happened.
Was he even hearing it right? Chihaya hadn't given him an answer yet?
But why?
She's in love with him… right?
"… And why did she not give you an answer yet?" He asked, once he was sure that he was prepared to receive Arata's response. He didn't want to hope. No, he can't, actually, even more so now that Arata had finally made his move, and he is about to go and take a surgery that may change his life forever.
Hope, after all, is both a beautiful and dangerous thing. It may leave you over the moon once it gave you what you wanted, and completely and utterly destroyed once it didn't fulfill your desire. He knew so, because he had experienced it first hand already.
And he wasn't keen on experiencing it again. Because he was fairly sure that he didn't know how he will survive the disappointment this time.
Arata was giving him a cautious look. "She told me that she had to make sure of what she is feeling first. And really, I can't be selfish enough to ask outright what her response is. I told her that I'm not rushin' her, and that I can wait."
He stared at him, hating himself for feeling concerned for his… friend, even when both of them knew that he was head-over-heels for that karuta baka as well. He guessed that there was something to be said at both of you being men and being able to relate to and understand what the other was feeling.
"And… you're alright with waiting?" Taichi finally drained the coffee he was holding in one large gulp, carefully placing it down on the coffee table and looking at the dark-haired man who sat opposite him with slightly narrowed eyes, waiting for his response cautiously as well. Somehow, it felt as if they were walking on a mine field –this being the first time of them talking about their feelings so openly for the one girl they had both fallen for badly years ago and waiting for the realizations to blow up in their faces.
Arata shrugged. "I have always been prepared to wait, Taichi. I trust that you know that already." Then he leaned back on the couch, now looking at him seriously. "So how about you?"
This time he narrowed his eyes at him in sudden suspicion. "What do you mean 'so how about you'?" He inquired in a clipped tone, knowing full well what Arata was getting to.
"You know what I'm talkin' about, Taichi. You're the smartest man I know."
He stared at him for a minute longer, trying to make sure whether Arata was making a bad joke or not.
"Okay. What's the punch line?" He tried to joke instead evasively. Why is Arata asking him this, all of a sudden anyway?
Arata smirked, but he was looking at him warily. "I'm not kiddin', Taichi. I'm askin' you what's your plan for Chihaya now."
"Nothing." He responded in an icy tone.
"You mean you're not goin' to do anythin'?" Arata asked in both surprise and confusion.
He blew out a breath warily. "Yes. Why is that such a surprise, Arata?" He averted his gaze from those probing, dark-blue eyes of his. "Do you really think it's worth telling her about it and messing up her mind even more? I'm not cruel enough to even think of doing it- not when you just told how you felt for her. And you know how she is already."
"She deserves to know."
"The only thing that she needed to know right now is my situation. Nothing more, nothing less. I agreed with you guys telling me that it was a mistake hiding what's happening to me years ago, and now that she finally knew that's enough for me already." He shot back, now meeting Arata's stern gaze. "I'm not planning on telling her about this, Arata."
"That was bein' incredibly selfish of you." Arata said, sounding quite… annoyed. Irritated. Something that Taichi couldn't imagine coming from him. He couldn't understand why Arata, of all people, was actually pushing him to do something regarding his feelings for Chihaya.
"Selfish? I was doing it for you. Shouldn't you be happy at all? You practically have her all to yourself now. I'm giving her to you." He tried to sound unaffected, but he could feel something twisting his heart in pain. Yes, he felt as if he was stabbing himself repeatedly through the chest.
Arata snorted, this time a snort like he couldn't believe Taichi was doing this. "No, you're not doin' it for my sake. You're just hidin', like what you did three years ago to her." He looked at Taichi in polite disbelief. "And I couldn't believe I was thinkin' of you as my rival."
A nerve twitched in Taichi's temple. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
"Rivals, Taichi. Remember?" Arata pointed out, wanting to knock some sense into that supposedly brilliant head of his. "We've known it all along. From the moment you had acted as that cool kid that everybody wanted to be friends with because you were scared of losin' her, to the time we first had our match, until that moment when we met in the Eastern qualifiers, I'm sure you've known that we had always been rivals. You know as well as I do that that just doesn't apply to karuta."
Taichi narrowed his amber eyes to him. The conversation was taking a turn in an emotional area he didn't want to go near. "Are you saying you wanted me to do something regarding her?"
"What else? As I've told you already, Chihaya deserves to know." Arata was looking at him with an unmistakable challenge in his eyes. "You and me, Taichi, it's always been you and me who had stayed close to Chihaya. From our childhood until now, I know how she wished that we will always be together. Of course, it will always be us, together, because we won't be able to just stay away from her that easily. But I know that you know that that wasn't really going to be the case. Eventually, she'll have to pick one over the other. She'll have to belong to someone."
"She won't belong to the either of us, Arata." He retorted pointedly. "You know where she belongs." He was glaring at him, knowing he would understand what he was talking about.
"Let me rephrase it then. She'll have to choose someone to belong to her." Arata continued, unfazed. "That's the truth of it. I've already told her my feelings, and I know how you felt for her. It's time to think of this as the adults that we are now. And I don't want to win automatically by a unanimous decision because you forfeited even before the match had started. That was an insult to someone who had given their all, ya know?"
That was probably the longest speech he had heard Arata make. Ironically, though, it had to be about their feelings for the crazy woman they both loved with all their being.
He was telling him to fight for her. Of all the people who had to convince him to let Chihaya know of his feelings, it was Arata, who he knew he had little chance of winning against. He didn't want to bother making Chihaya aware, because he knew, even back during their high school days, of how she felt for him, even when she hadn't been aware of it herself. It didn't take a lot of brain cells to figure out how she felt for him, after all.
At least, to people like him.
But he also knew that Arata was right. He had wondered, and so often had he did, what he would feel if he and Arata exchanged places. If Arata was the one who had stayed with her back in high school… would Chihaya look for him? Would she be driven as well to bring him back into her little karuta world, to open his eyes to the truth that neither between the three of them could truly give up karuta?
Would she miss him?
He knew the answer to that already. The way she had embraced him from earlier… how she had wrapped him so tightly in her arms… it was unfair of him, thinking of her that way. He knew that she had missed him, yes. But there is the truth that she had missed him as a friend does for her best friend as well.
He couldn't dare to hope. He didn't know how he was going to survive the disappointment that was sure to come in doses.
And he didn't know what made him take the risk, anyway. Perhaps he really had damaged a lot of his brain cells. After all, this was Arata they were talking about, the Wataya Arata, current karuta Meijin who he knew there was very little chance he can equal to and even stand up against. He had already known that years ago.
"May the best man win." Arata said, seeing how his facial expression changed.
What the hell.
Taichi raised his eyes to him, amber meeting sapphire head-on.
"I hope you don't regret challenging me, Arata." He responded, smirking with more than a touch of wariness. He extended out a hand, and Arata, shook it, their expressions turning all business the moment their hands met in a handshake.
Oh what the hell…
He knew he was going to be in for a long haul. He knew he was going to be in for a heart ache. But there was no turning back now. The choice had been made, and he will have to fight, -and fight hard,- for her.
"May the best man win."
Aww. Don't we just love that. Taichi is prepared to finally man up and face Chihaya and his feelings for her directly! I'm quite glad for him. Sometimes, all he needed is a push from the one person he isn't expecting to do so–Arata. I'm sure we all felt the same way before regarding this duo, -that what Taichi needed, all this time, is an encouragement (or challenge, maybe) from his rival himself. Someone had to teach him to be a little more aggressive regarding his feelings for her, and who better do that than Arata himself?
I hope you people found this chapter fun to read. It was lighter now, (or so I like to believe,) and I do hope it will be the same for the next chapters. I'm planning to post ten chapters for now, if nothing will make me extend this story. I am excited to find out what I will write next.
Well then, I'll be off writing the next one. Thanks for reading guys! And please, if it isn't too much to ask, let me know what you think! See you in the next one, my lovely readers!