Castiel finished his work shortly. When Dean returned, he had managed not to distract him more than twice more before the essay was stapled and slid away. Dean was sprawled out on his bed, bored, his button down unbuttoned, before the last lessons were finished. When Cas finally closed his textbook, Dean looked up from his car magazine curiously to see him getting up out of his chair. No questions could escape his lips before Cas had crossed the room in two strides to Dean's bed, the magazine fluttering to the floor.

Dean sat back, his heart leaping, as Cas straddled his lap. The incredible fervor in the dark haired boy's burning eyes and parted lips curled out of his breath and against Dean's cheeks. Losing himself in the steely, pre-dawn blue of his eyes, Dean felt his heat meld with his own, and swallowed in anticipation. He had his hands against Dean's chest. Their eyes locked and swam. A burst of sexual tension snapped when Dean's hands grabbed the offered thighs on either side of his own eagerly and Cas grabbed his shirt front, pulling him in for a rough kiss.

The weight of Cas on his thighs stirred the nearly dampened ardor, rekindling it in a heady rush. Dean would give him that much – Cas knew what he was doing. He pressed his body to Dean's and sank into his mouth and sparked his embers into flame. Dean pushed his hands all over Cas's thighs and up his shirt to his back – he pulled and rubbed the velvet skin, memorizing his bumps and ridges like mapping out a country. Cas pushed aside his open shirt and shoved it away, arms and hands sinking all over him. He grabbed Dean's mouth with ferocity as he moved, and Dean moaned into Cas's mouth in return, only making him rougher. Castiel pushed Dean back against the wall and put his hands up on the cold painted-over bricks, using the leverage to shift and move his hips.

Dean bucked against him hungrily in return. All at once, in a dizzying roil in his gut, he wanted things he didn't even know how to ask for; things he wasn't even sure how to name and the intensity of the sheer need immobilized him. His lack of motion alerted Cas to a change in his need and the boy paused in his madly sexual grinding. The strength of the bulge in Dean's jeans was self-explanatory. Dean let his hands rest at the soft waist of his roommate as he drew breath in heavy pants. Cas, on the other hand, was hardly breathing hard. When Dean looked up, expecting to see the same fever, he saw instead fear.

"Cas?" He blurted, gripping his waist more tightly in worry, his tone mirroring his grip. "Hey, what's wrong?"

The blue eyes shut and Cas took a deep breath, drawing his arms down from the wall and into their laps. He sat back and let his head bow. He worked his jaw. "I'm sorry," he cleared his throat. "It's been a while."

Dean still felt something dark in his undertone. "Well this is a total first for me, so I get you there. But what's with the scared look, Cas?" He pressed. "You're white as a sheet. Did I-?"

"No, it wasn't you," Cas said quickly. "I just… I told you about… high school, right?"

"You said your last two years sucked majorly," Dean replied. "Not why." He helped Cas climb off his lap and sink onto the bed beside him, putting his arm around his shoulders. Cas leaned into his touch but didn't look at him.

"It was because of a guy." Cas said quietly, staring down at his hands.

A dark fury crept into Dean's chest, replacing the horny quickly. "What happened?" He managed. "It's all right, I'm here for you." He leaned over and pressed his lips against Cas's temple. It seemed to break Cas of his stiffness. He melted against Dean's shoulder, sliding an arm around his waist and touching his forehead to Dean's.

"He was the one who made me… come out of the closet," Cas explained quietly. "I was infatuated with him for years. He was my neighbor. We grew up in the same place, so our parents were always together, and so we would spend entire summers together." He rubbed his face with his free hand. "Well, we went to the same schools, too. He was always the 'it' guy, you know? The ladies man. For all the time I knew him, I never really had any relationships. A few flings, but they were pathetic. No girl was my type.

"But I never really liked any other guys like I liked Martius. He was an icon of social popularity and looks." He paused here to flash Dean a smile. "You're more handsome than he was." They shared grins and Cas shook his head. "But he figured out I had a crush on him when we were juniors. I thought he'd be furious, but instead he took it as a compliment. We began to hang out more often – even though he was with the 'in' crowd, we were still close – until one time he planned a camping trip, on the beach, with some friends. Everyone else cancelled at the last minute except us, so we went anyway.

"We drove four hours and spent all day exhausting ourselves at ice cream shops and skate parks. It was heaven on earth, being able to be this open with him. We talked about everything. But at the end of the day, I figured he'd bring two tents, since it was clear I liked him, but when we pitched it on the dunes it was clear there wasn't two. We built a fire and all night before we went to bed I was a mess about it. I really didn't want to make a move on him and have him push me away. He was my best friend. But he didn't even seem fazed. That was the night I lost my virginity."