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Chapter rated T for language and themes

Chapter 40: Present Day V

Rose

I'm lying on my bed in my red, lace, strapless bra and matching panties staring up at the ceiling. The dress I am supposed to wear tonight is hanging on the back of the door to my bedroom, staring at me, taunting me. I'm nervous to the point of sickness about tonight, and I finally decided to just lie down and take a breath when I started to get too stressed out.

Then an hour had passed and I was still laying here.

I have no idea how Scorpius is going to react. But he's a Malfoy, and Malfoys value honor above just about all things, so I know that no matter what, Scorpius will feel obligated to care for the baby. Plus he loves me, and I tell myself that he loves me enough to do this with me. He loves me more than anything. I know he does. I know he does because I love him more than anything, and I can see the signs on him.

I smile at the thought.

But I don't want him to do it because he feels obligated or even because he loves me more than anything. I want him to want this like I do. And I'll give him time to want it, because it took time for me to want it.

My first thought was terror—pure and complete terror at the thought that I was eighteen, not even a year out of Hogwarts, and pregnant with my boyfriend's child. But it didn't take long for the terror to turn into happiness. I am old enough. I have money saved up from the record and from the tour. I am well established in my career and in my apartment. My apartment is way too big for me anyway.

But it isn't just that.

It was that it's with Scorpius, and Scorpius Malfoy is the absolute love of my life. I cannot imagine my life without him, and I don't want to. Even the mere thought of being without him makes me feel so sick that I can't physically take it. He is my everything.

That's why this scares me so much. I don't want to—I can't—lose him. Even if he stays physically with me, I want him to be with me more than that. I want his heart, his soul, his love, his body, his everything. I can't risk losing any part of him, and that's why this scares me. Scorpius helped me find myself. And if I lose him, I lose myself.

The thought sends anxiety lancing through my chest, and I decide I have to take my mind off of it. So, I reach over and pick my cellular up off the end table next to my bed and I call the one person who can help ease the anxiety.

"Hey, Cheeks," he says after picking up after the first ring. His deep baritone soothes me almost immediately, and I turn and curl onto my side and smile at my phone.

"Hey." I hear something loud in the background like gunshots, and I just frown but don't say anything.

"How are you feeling? How did he take it?"

I pause.

"You didn't tell him," Albus says immediately.

"Not yet," I say. "But he's coming back tonight, and I'm definitely going to."

"Let me guess, he distracted you with sex."

I grin. "Well."

I can practically hear Albus rolling his eyes. Although I can hardly hear it above whatever ruckus is going on at his apartment.

"I swear to god, the two of you have more sex than fucking bunnies."

I smile. "Well, anyway, I'm going to tell him tonight. After dinner, I'm just going to tell him. It's time that he knows. I'm fucking two months pregnant with his child, and he—"

"OH MY GOD, FERGIE, CAN YOU TURN THAT SHIT DOWN! JESUS!"

My eyes widen and then I laugh when I hear Albus yelling at his boyfriend. They just moved in together when we got back from tour, and apparently it's still taking some adjusting.

"It's not funny, Rose," he says as I hear the volume in the background reduce significantly. "His stupid fucking video games are driving me crazy."

"Aww, you two are adorable."

"Whatever." Again, I hear the eye roll, but this time, I also hear a smile. "So you're just going to say it?"

"Yeah," I say. "If I don't just spit it out, I'll never get the nerve."

"I think that's the way you gotta do it. Just—ugh—oh, my god."

I hear muffled noises on the other end, and then I think I hear vague smacking sounds.

"Fergie—dammit," Albus says in a muffled voice. He sounds vaguely annoyed, but more than anything he sounds amused.

"Did she tell him yet?" I hear Fergie's voice.

"Hi, Fergie," I say, grinning.

"She says 'hi,'" Albus says to him. "No, she hasn't told him yet."

"Wimp," Fergie says.

"Hey!" I protest. "It's not that easy." I hear Fergie laughing his loud, booming laugh, and then I hear some muffled shuffling.

"I want to take a shower," I hear Fergie say. His voice sounds farther away.

There's a pause on the line, and then I hear Albus. His voice sounds more hoarse than it did before. "Rose, can I let you go?"

I roll my eyes. "I guess you're over the video games?"

Albus chuckles.

"I gotta go," he says, his voice sounding breathy. I roll my eyes again. "Good luck tonight. I'm a phone call away if it—you know."

"Yeah. Have fun."

"Okay, love you, bye." And the line goes dead.

I smile and shake my head. Then I sigh and roll back onto my back on my bed. It's going to be a long night.

Scorpius

I'm standing at a muggle florist, trying to decide which flowers Rose would like best.

I just left the manor, and I had a long discussion with my parents about everything that is going on. Despite what Rose and I both thought years ago, my parents adore Rose. They cared more about how she was doing than about how the trip to America had gone.

My father always gets this fond look on his face when I talk about Rose. It's that look that people get when they're reminiscing or just remembering something that had happened long ago. I think it might have something to do with her parents, but he never says either way. If I ever mention it, he just smiles and shakes his head. My father is such an old man sometimes.

I know Rose's favorite flowers are orchids, but I can't stop staring at the red roses in their case. They stand out so starkly from every other flower—a bold statement about who they are—and they remind me so much of her that even though I know she would love orchids, the roses are her. Rose. My rose.

I'm about to reach into the case to pull out the roses when I get a call on my cellular. I pull it out of my pocket and look down at it with a frown.

"Hello?"

"Hi, son."

"Dad. Hi. Did I forget something at home?"

"No. I wanted to just call and remind you about what you have to do."

"Dad…"

"We didn't get to talk about it much when you were here earlier. Son, I know this is hard." I sigh and listen to my father. "It's unfair, too. But you have to talk to her about it. Tonight."

"I know."

"You should have talked to her about it sooner."

"I know."

"Son…" My father pauses. It's like I can hear his sadness and regret on the other end. "She's stronger than you think."

I close my eyes and let my father's words wash over me. He's right. In all things, my father is always right. This is no exception.

After a long pause, I finally say, "I know, dad. You're right."

He doesn't say anything immediately and there's a long, heavy silence over the phone. I know there's a lot he wants to say, but he won't say it. Not now. Not anymore. I hear a tapping noise, and I know that he's sitting in his study, tapping on his desk with his pen the way he does when he's thinking about something.

"I'm sorry, son," my father finally said quietly. "I wish it didn't have to be this way."

I close my eyes and pinch the bridge of my nose. Why does everything have to be so fucking hard? "It's okay, dad," I hear myself say. My voice sounds so far away. "It's no one's fault."

I hear his sigh, and I know he wants to say something else about it, but he doesn't. He just says softly, "Okay, I'll talk to you soon. I love you."

"Me, too, dad."

Then his voice is a bit more stern. "Tonight."

"Yes," I say. "Tonight."

Next chapter:

"Do you understand that you are the absolute most important thing in my life and losing you would kill me? Losing this job… yeah, it would suck for a few days—a few weeks, maybe—but losing you. My god, I would die. It would kill me."