This has been on my computer a pretty long time.
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Tell me everything that happened,
Tell me everything you saw.
They had lights inside their eyes.
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"What are you doing here? Get out", he hisses.
She gasps and turns around, her eyes wide taking in his dark appearance on the doorstep. He is glaring at her, his eyes cold on her, looking at her face but not fully. He is not with her, he is not in this room. She moves to the door, to exit, passing next to him. She is so close, feeling the warmth of his body but this time, there is no gentleness, no calmness around him. He is just harsh and cold, not letting her near him. She can touch his body, but his mind is now closed to her. She has lost him. She never thought she would mourn him, never thought she wanted to know him until she couldn't anymore.
"You don't go in there, you don't walk around this house, you stay in your room until I can go out and make blood rain from the sky".
He closes the door, without even sparing a glance and storms outside the room. It breaks her heart. Well, she is going to explore her room since she can't seem to be allowed to move. She glances at the room, it is pretty, full of light, white stuff everywhere. She falls back on the bed, her hair like a halo and stares at the white ceiling. She is bored and tired and hungry. She thinks about Tyler, about Klaus, about Elena who killed Kol, about Bonnie who trapped them in Klaus' mansion. She thinks about Kol's death and she can't help but think about how wrong it thinks about everything that has happened that past two days, trapped in this house with Klaus. She doesn't even want to think about how it came to this, to think about how Klaus had griped her when Bonnie had locked him up in his mansion. It was stupid of her to think talking to him was a good idea, to come to his house after he had escaped the Gilbert home. Stupid little Caroline.
She wakes up and it is the middle of the night, she can tell by the moon shining through the window, by the stars, by the black sky, she can sense it. She is hungry and she closes her eyes, trying to hear Klaus in the house, trying to see if it's safe to go to the kitchen, trying to find out if Klaus is really going to hurt her. She hears his breathing, steady, away from her and she thinks it's safe, she thinks, yeah, I should go to the kitchen. She finds the kitchen instantly, the smell of blood so powerful in the room that it makes her fangs comes out and her veins to appear underneath her eyes. She takes a bag and wanders around the house, walking into Klaus' study. She had loved this room since the moment she laid her eyes on it. It is beautiful, all this paintings exposed, all this darkness, this beauty, this depth, it is overwhelming. She enters the room and smiles. She looks at the mess of drawings on the table, sees the bottles on the floor and lets her fingers wander through the drawings, catching one he has done recently.
She knows because she has seen the scene herself, it was two days ago, and it's Kol bursting in flames, a stake in his heart. He is looking at her, right at her soul, his eyes at screaming at her, 'why are you doing this to me? Why are you letting them hurt me? You are too late, this is wrong, I hate you'. And she knows this is what Klaus has seen. She realizes a tear has fallen from her eye on the drawing and she gasps. He'll know she was there, she's screwed but after everything that has happened she does not care, he needs to know that someone thinks it was not right. That someone thinks killing Kol was the worst idea. That he did not deserve that. That Elena is guilty, that Bonnie is guilty, that Jeremy is guilty and that the balance has to be restored and that this is going to end in blood because they took a life, they took more than one because they killed the entire vampire line Kol had sired. One life for another, this is how it works. She lets the drawing fall on the table, lets her gaze wander, trying to think about something else.
She sees bottles of liquor on top of a locker with drawers, letting the blood bag on a table which is against the wall, she takes one of the bottles – she has already entered his lair, she can push a little more. She tastes it, whiskey. She tries to open a drawer but it is locked, she huffs and takes a gulp, putting the bottle down, she breaks the locker. She smiles at her victory and looks into the drawer. It's filled with drawings, some old, yellowed, some parchment. She takes one, it is Rebekah, laughing, eyes closed, head launched back, tears at the corner of her eyes. Without leaving the drawing, she takes another one and finds Elijah, concentrated on chess, finger crossed, a ghost of smile on his lips. She finds another with Kol and Elijah, staring in the same direction, smile on their faces, Kol's is a little crooked, like he is whispering something to his brother. Another one with Rebekah, a pout on her face and pleading eyes. One more with Kol, a glass in hand, an eyebrow raised. Another of Finn and Sage dancing, their eyes connected.
Soon, she is sitting on the floor with her legs crossed, the bottle next to her knee, surrounded by drawings. And she sees his humanity here, what he has decided to keep away from her is in this piece, in this drawer, in the crook of Rebekah's smile, in Elijah's brown eyes, in Finn and Sage's linked hands, in the mischievous glint in Kol's eyes. Her friends killed Finn and Sage, her friends killed Kol, her friends are killing Klaus' humanity. Because Elena can't deal with being a vampire. All of them had to deal with it but Elena can't so she won't. It makes her sad and angry because Damon wanted to kill her just because she had been unfortunate enough to die. Like it was her fault, like she had asked to be a part of the supernatural world. She finds it unfair, she feels hopeless and she looks at the table where she knows Kol's drawing rests his eyes screaming at her, asking why? and she wants to tell him I don't know, Kol,I don't understand either.
She huffs, takes another gulp and keeps digging into Klaus' memory, his humanity. And she sees centuries of laughter, of secrets, of love, of family and she thinks she can finally grasp what the Mikaelson are, were, or whatever. She is an only child and she can't understand what it means to have a sibling but just thinking about spending centuries with Elena and Bonnie and Stefan and losing them after all this time, she can't even think about it, she can't even begin to understand how hard it must be. Tears begin to appear on her eyes, thinking about all this pain, this sorrow, this endless ache.
She sees Kol sleeping, one hand under his head, his mouth slightly open. She sees a young boy with long hair, smiling, she doesn't know who he is, he can't be one of the Originals she has met because he doesn't look like one of them. It might be the brother Elena said they had lost when they were human. She can't remember his name. She sees Rebekah jumping on a bed, her hair so long, her smile so wide, her eyes closed so tight. She sees Elijah, with long hair, on a horse. She sees Rebekah again pouting, sitting on a chair with a beautiful dress, Kol behind her making grimaces and Elijah's back. She sees a ballroom with Kol and Rebekah whirling together and Elijah's profile. They all seems to be from the time when they were vampires but there is one that she thinks is from their time as humans because the unknown boy is with them. And for once they are all together.
On the drawing, there is Esther, smiling next to a fire, standing in a long dress, her gaze is on her daughter sitting at her feet, Kol is sitting with the unknown boy whispering to each other, smiling in a corner of the room. Elijah, Finn and Mikael are talking, sitting on a table at the opposite of the two boys. Here is his family, here is his humanity. His mother is dead, his father is dead, the unknown boy is dead, Finn is dead, Kol is dead. He lost all of them, only Rebekah and Elijah remain.
"Did you imagine?" she whispers. "Would you have made them, Esther, if you had known the misery you put them in? Would you have made the same mistake all over again just for the chance of not suffering any more death? If you had seen this future, would you had still killed your own children? Tell me, would you?"
She traces the face of the woman with the tip of her fingers, the loving smile on her face. The tears start falling on her cheeks and she lets the paper fall, taking her head in her hands. She is lost in this heap of memories and she sobs thinking about her own father. If you had known Daddy, would you still have tried to kill me? Tell me, Daddy, do you still love the monster I am?
She is pressed against the wall, his hand on her throat, his eyes on hers, full of anger.
"What did you think you were doing?" he screams.
She wants to answer but she finds nothing to say.
"I am sorry, I am so sorry".
She repeats, again and again and again and he lets her fall like a broken doll on the floor, a crumbled mess. She sobs in her hands and lets her tears fall and keeps repeating that she's sorry, she didn't know, she swears she didn't know. He is on his knees, facing her.
"You are not talking about your intrusion, are you?"
"I am talking about Kol, about how wrong we were, about how guilty we all are. I am so sorry, Klaus, so sorry. I didn't know".
And she is struck that here is the answer for all the mistakes all of them have made and keep making. They didn't know. How much it hurts, how they lived, who they are, who they were. They are children who want to play with adults but their mistakes cost lives, their mistakes hurt other people and nobody is going to erase what they did, nobody is going to forgive. Because they all are children playing and nobody is mature enough to forgive. Because they never admit their mistakes, because Elena is the queen of the children of Mystic Falls and she won't give up her desires and nobody is going to stop her because they are children and children just know how to throw a tantrum when they don't have what they want.
"What didn't you know? That I still have a humanity? That I loved my brother ? I showed you kindness, I showed you mercy, I showed you who I was and you still killed my brother".
He takes a gulp from the bottle.
"I didn't even know", she cries. "It's not fair, this drawings, it makes me see him so human, so full of life and thinking he's not here anymore, I just, I can't even understand what you're going through".
He is sitting next to her on the floor now, she sees he's about to talk but then, but his phone vibrates and she sees the fear in his eyes when he looks at the ID caller.
"Elijah?" he whispers in the phone.
He must know she would hear everything but he doesn't ask her to go. Her head falls softly on the wall, eyes closed. She tries to not make a sound.
"Niklaus. You called?"
"I have bad news, Elijah, like very bad".
She hears Elijah sigh in the phone. She opens her eyes a little and sees Klaus so fearful, so painfully fearful.
"What did you do?"
She finds it sad that Elijah is already thinking that it's something his brother did, more than him suffering.
"Kol is dead".
They hear nothing, not a sound, not his breathing, not hers, not a beating heart, nothing on the phone. There's silence everywhere, silence which should be cut by Kol, but Kol is dead and silence is everywhere.
"How?" Elijah breaths.
And she sees Klaus closing his eyes.
"He wanted to cut off the hunter's arm so nobody would find the cure, said it was dangerous, that we should fear Silas. But the doppelganger stole the white oak stake and killed him. I was at the door, Elijah, I saw everything and I couldn't do anything… I just-"
"Where are you?"
The question is urgent and Caroline wonders if Elijah is now worried for Klaus or for Mystic Fall's inhabitants.
"At the mansion, the bloody witch locked me in. She wants to kill me or desiccate me because she knows I'll hunt them down".
"Where is Rebekah?"
"Running after the bloody cure, I didn't talk to her. She won't talk to me anyways".
Klaus looks like a child now, talking that way about his sister.
"You call her, I'll in town tomorrow".
"Why don't you come now?"
"I have things to do, Niklaus, don't be a petulant child", his brother sighs.
She wants to laugh at Klaus' expression, he really looks like a child who has been scolded right now.
"Who are you with?"
Her eyes open wide, she was sure she hadn't made a sound, not even to breathe. How does he know? Klaus doesn't seem surprised by the question however.
"Caroline".
"Why is she still alive?"
Their eyes meet and she sees the same question in his eyes.
"She has nothing to do with this", he finally answers.
"And why is she staying with you?"
"She's trapped here too, Elijah. When are you going to arrive?"
"I'll text you, don't murder anybody before I come home. And talk to Rebekah".
Elijah hangs up and she notices that Klaus' eyes are still focused in hers. She sees how sad he looks but how the promise of his big brother's presence has made him less fearful, more confident.
"You don't have to stay here, I'll tidy up".
"Call your sister, I'll do it".
He looks at her with so many emotions she has to lower her gaze. Damn, she's falling.
"What do you want, traitor?"
Klaus rolls his eyes and she sees he has some difficulties to restrain himself. His eyes find hers and she manages to weakly smile.
"Can you sit somewhere?"
"No. What do you want?"
"Bekah, something happened to Kol".
There's a pause, a small silence and then they hear Rebekah take a deep breath.
"You're lying".
Her voice is small, hurt, childish. And Caroline thinks about the girl she saw on the drawings, the girl who had her head against her mother's knee, the girl who just lost her third brother.
"I'm so sorry, Bekah, I wish I was lying, I called Elijah, he's coming tomorrow".
They hear her sniff and Klaus' face is contorted in pain. It's his family, it's his own heart which is breaking along his sister's.
"Don't cry, Bekah, please. You need to be strong, we'll be together".
It breaks her heart, seeing him begging like that, seeing the powerful Niklaus Mikaelson begging his sister to stop crying like he would beg for his life.
"Where are you, Nik?"
"I'm locked up by the witch in the mansion, if you come, you'll be trapped too".
"I'll come, I won't enter the house but I just need to be there".
She breaths, then there's a silence and she hangs up and Klaus has already left the room. Caroline is alone with the drawings, putting them carefully in the drawer. Kol is dead, their family is broken and like magnet, they attract each other, the three remaining siblings of the Original Family. If her friends thought they would win by getting one of them killed, they were wrong, they just made them forgive each other. She hears a knock, and the sound of the front door opening. She sits back on the floor, the drawing of their human time in her hands. She lets her head fall back on the wall again and closes her eyes, listening.
"Nik".
It's more a sigh of relief than a real greeting.
"Bekah".
"What happened?"
"The Gilberts. I swear Bekah, I'll kill them both. And that witch too. I saw everything, where were you?"
"I was with Stefan, he wanted the dagger to use it on Kol and I gave it to him, I thought, maybe he wouldn't die if he was daggered so I gave him. I was too late, dancing with Stefan, laughing as my brother was killed".
Rebekah sniffs and Caroline realizes she's crying, She can hear it in the way she breathes, in the way it alters her voice.
"You didn't know, little sister".
It's silent now. Just the silence.
"Where is his body?"
"The Gilberts' house".
"I'll bury him".
"We'll do it together, us three. One of my useless hybrids will put it to safety. I wish I hadn't have come in this town for these stupid hybrids".
"It doesn't matter. Always and forever, Nik".
There is silence once again, then the sound of the wind and a door closing and then the silence swallows everything once again. Tomorrow though is another day.
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They were kids that I once knew
Now they're all dead hearts to you
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Stars, Dead Hearts
Yeah, is there someone out there x) ?
I want to thank Mickey for letting a reviews and my Beta to love is to be destroyed who works really fast and who is really awesome. Anyway, I'm waiting for your reaction ! Reviews, please ? :)