Frozen Together Chapter 5
Knock, knock, na-knock knock. "Do you want to build a snowman?" That had become their special code phrase.
After a few seconds, Elsa answered, "All right." The lock clicked and the door swung halfway open. Anna stepped inside eagerly.
They'd been meeting in her room, off and on, for more than a week now. There were some days when Anna knocked, and Elsa would answer, "Not today. Please." One morning, she didn't even answer at all. When Anna would ask why later, she always got the same answer – "I was scared."
Anna didn't push the issue. Maybe she'd never be the Queen of Arendelle, but she was already the Queen of Determination, and she knew she'd get her answers eventually. For now, it was enough just to spend time with her sister, and get to know her all over again.
They would sit in those absurd high-backed chairs, about six feet away from each other (that was Elsa's comfort zone), and talk about whatever came to their minds. Elsa had almost forgotten the girlish art of chatting about nothing for hours on end, so Anna had to do most of the talking. That was no hardship for Anna, who had had no one to talk to for years, and had resorted to talking to the pictures on the walls. She talked about her own childhood, the many strange and wonderful people who had visited the palace over the years (including a nice-looking young prince whom their parents had considered as a possible husband for Anna, until they learned he was just a penniless pretender whose hobby was impersonating royalty), and the state of the kingdom that Elsa would eventually become the queen of. Her older sister would sit listening to it all, nodding here and there, almost smiling at the amusing parts, but never completely relaxed.
At some point during each visit, the snow would start falling. Anna quickly learned that the weather indoors would take a turn for the worse whenever Elsa felt stressed or fearful. She learned what kinds of things not to say, especially any mention of Elsa's ability. She also learned that she could make things better just by distracting her sister and getting her to think pleasant thoughts. Once, all she had to do was cross her eyes and stick out her tongue; on other days, it was more difficult. She'd given up on thinking of a royal protocol for this kind of thing; she just improvised.
As soon as her sister's stress had faded and the weather in her room had returned to normal, Elsa's reaction was predictable. She would be badly shaken by the experience, she would be slightly embarrassed, and she would quietly say, "Thank you, Anna."
Anna was dying to know more about the connection between her sister and frozen water, but she'd learned that this was a forbidden subject. As she stepped into Elsa's room today, she resolved to hold her curiosity in check for a little while longer. Stressing out her sister wasn't fun. She took her seat and waited for Elsa to say something.
"So... what are we going to do today?" Elsa finally asked.
"Do?" Anna wasn't ready for that question. So far, all they'd done was talk. "Uhh... could we play a game?" she blurted out.
"I don't know many games," Elsa said, a bit sadly. Anna was even sadder – Elsa used to be great at making up games for the two of them to play. She tried to think of a game that two young ladies with pretensions to adulthood might play together.
"Chess?" she asked hesitantly.
"I'm not very good," Elsa said.
"Me neither," Anna nodded. Elsa got out of her chair and sat down on the floor. Anna did likewise, being careful not to get too close. Her sister gestured with outspread fingers, and an eight-by-eight grid of squares drew itself in shiny ice crystals on the rug. She wiggled her fingers, and thirty-two beautiful little chess pieces rose out of the carpet, sixteen in pure white ice, sixteen in blue ice. Anna tried not to gasp in delight. Elsa got upset if her sister paid too much attention to her special talent.
It was no exaggeration that neither girl was very good at the game. In fact, both of them had forgotten most of the rules, so they made them up as they went along. Those rules quickly crossed the line into the absurd, and went downhill from there, until both girls collapsed into a giggling fit and forgot about the game. The chess pieces vanished in little puffs of ice crystals that sparkled as they floated to the floor.
"I'm glad you came today, Anna," Elsa finally said.
"So am I," Anna replied. "You don't know how many times I knocked on your door, and wished with all my heart that you'd let me in, or at least talk to me."
"You don't know how many times I wanted to let you in," Elsa said quietly.
Anna thought she might scream if she didn't ask, "Then why didn't you?" But she bit her tongue, literally. It hurt enough to keep her from asking the question. She knew it would only make things worse. Brute-force stubbornness wouldn't help her solve this mystery. She'd change the subject instead.
"Did you ever want to get a makeover?"
"A what?" Elsa looked perplexed.
"A makeover! You know – new hairstyle, new makeup, new clothes, new shoes... lots of new shoes!" She tried to hold back a giggle, and failed.
Elsa shook her head sadly. "I can't. Queens can't do that kind of thing. People like their royalty to be unchanging and predictable." She folded her hands, the way their father used to do when he shifted into teaching mode, and dropped her voice as low as it would go. "Stability is the thing, Elsa. Always remember that." Then she resumed her normal voice. "I'll admit, the 'new shoes' part sounds fun, even though I don't need shoes very much."
"But why not?" Anna burst out. "I mean, you could just walk up and down the hall with me a couple of times, or visit some of the other rooms in the palace... maybe even take a quick walk outside – wouldn't that be..."
Snow began falling. Oh, no, not again, Anna thought. The wind picked up quickly this time; Elsa was already close to complete and utter panic.
"Elsa!" she shouted. "Think about... think about flowers!"
"Flowers?"
"Flowers! I know you've seen them out your window all these years – the reinroses, the vivendels, the bergfrues, even the bakkekløvers! Think how beautiful they are! Think of the colors!" The snowfall was beginning to slacken.
"Think about the way the vivendels smell, Elsa! I know you can open your windows in the summer – you must have smelled them growing in the palace gardens! Their fragrance takes over everything." Elsa was beginning to relax again. Anna took a hesitant step toward her.
"Think how pretty you'd look with a kusymre in your hair," she said softly. "I can't wear kusymres; they don't look good on me." She rested a hand on Elsa's shoulder. "I could pick you a kusymre if you wanted me to."
Elsa didn't answer; she just flung her arms around her sister and clung to her, shaking. Anna returned her embrace, and slowly rocked her back and forth until the shaking stopped, and the snowfall along with it.
"Thank you, Anna," Elsa whispered.
"That's what sisters do for each other," she whispered back.
Elsa slid away to arm's length, but held onto her sister's hands. "Mother and Father never did learn how to help me control it," she said, very quietly. "You just seem to know how to settle me down."
"I also seem to know how to set you off," Anna replied ruefully.
"That doesn't take much," Elsa said sadly. "Oh, Anna... I've been stuck in this room so long, I don't know if I could ever come out again!"
"You've never been out of here since...?"
"Only to take my bath in the powder room, after everyone else has gone to bed," Elsa said with some embarrassment. "And sometimes Father and Mother would meet me in their room, or in the back stairway if they were going away..." She broke off; that brief meeting in the back stairway was her last memory of her parents. "But just walking around in daylight? I haven't done that since... I don't know when."
"Elsa, you know you're going to have to come out some day. Your coronation is only a few years away!" She felt Elsa tighten up, but went on. "Are you going to wave some kind of magic staff, and suddenly you'll walk out that door, and everything will be different, and nothing will go wrong? You need to work up to it!" When Elsa didn't respond, she added, "I'll go with you."
"Go with me?" Elsa didn't seem to believe it. "Anna, why are you so endlessly patient and nice to me?"
"Because I'm your sister." To Anna, that said it all, but she sensed that Elsa needed to hear more. "I love you, and I want you to be happy. I know you're not happy, stuck inside this room. So if there's anything I can do to help you get out of here, I'll gladly do it."
"But... what if someone sees..."
Understanding dawned. "You stay in your room because you're afraid someone will see the snow?"
"Oh, Anna, it's more than that! Much more! Don't ask me to explain it!" She was folding her arms and lowering her head, a sure sign that she was fighting whatever-it-was inside her, and the snow was about to start falling again. Anna quickly reached for Elsa's shoulder and gave it a firm squeeze.
"I won't ask!" she exclaimed. Elsa slowly took a breath and relaxed. Anna let out the breath she'd been holding. She'd nipped that one in the bud.
"But, Elsa, can't we just go for a quick walk up and down the hall, just once? Gerda's out shopping, and Kai has the day off, so no one will see you."
"Is it that important to you?" Elsa wondered.
"You need to start somewhere," Anna replied. "It's time."
" 'Cause for the first time in forever, no more hiding – you can stand!
"We can tame your power together, if you let me hold your hand.
"You can be the queen we've dreamed of! Live in hope and not in fear,
"Because from now until forever, I will stay right here."
Elsa shook her head. "Anna, you don't know what you're saying! You can't stay beside me your whole life! What do you think is going to happen when you meet a nice prince and get married? You'll have to leave Arendelle and live in his kingdom with him!"
"Nope," Anna replied cheerfully, with a snap of her fingers. "He'll have to come and live here, because here is where I'm staying. Right beside you."
Elsa smiled, just a little. "I thought I was supposed to be the big sister!"
"You'll get your chance, I'm sure," Anna replied lightly. "Now, Your Highness, what would you say to a quick morning constitutional?"
Elsa reached for the door handle, then pulled her hand away. "I can't do it."
"That's okay. I can." Anna eased the door open, stuck her head out, and looked both ways. "The coast is clear. No one is in sight, and I don't hear anyone downstairs." When Elsa hesitated, Anna took her hand. Their fingers intertwined. "Just one step at a time, Elsa."
They stepped out into the hall. Elsa was almost rigid. Anna couldn't tell if she was practicing walking like a queen, or if she was just scared. They walked hand-in-hand to the end of the hall and turned back. That was when Elsa saw that she'd left white frosted footprints in the rug. She gasped.
Anna gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. "Don't worry about that! The carpet can take it. We used to run up and down this hall in wet, snowy boots all the time when we were little. Remember?"
"But... I hate to make a mess for Kai to clean up!" Elsa protested. "It's not fair to him."
"I don't think he'll complain about a little mess like this, not after some of the big messes we made him clean up!" She had to smile at the memories. "I can remember one time when we were playing with snow, down in the ballroom, and –"
Evidently, that was the wrong thing to say.
Elsa went pale; her eyes went wide. She let go of Anna's hand and dashed back to her room. She left a spray of snowflakes behind her, and more icy footprints in the rug that spread until each print was three feet across. The door slammed, and the lock clicked. Anna knew it would be no use trying to talk to her sister through the door now.
She just stood alone at the end of the hall, one tear rolling down her cheek. "What happened to you, Elsa? What are you so afraid of?"