DISCLAIMER: I do not intend for this plot to be canon to the TV series.
Flashback. Ted's childhood living room, Cleveland, July 20, 1993.
Ted is sitting in front of a TV watching a rerun of "Family Ties." Several packed suitcases stand near the entrance of the house. Ted has his Jewfro and is wearing glasses, jeans, and a T-shirt.
FUTURE TED VOICEOVER: It was back in the summer of 1993 before my sophomore year of high school. I was 15 at the time and living with your Grandpa Alfred, Grandma Virginia, and Aunt Heather. I had finished my packing a watching a rerun of a popular show from my childhood called "Family Ties", which premiered when I was 4 years old and 2 years before your mom was born. Most people liked the show because of Michael J. Fox, the best Canadian-born celebrity of all time…
FUTURE ROBIN VOICE OVER: TED!
FUTURE TED VOICEOVER: Sorry, Robin. The second best Canadian-born celebrity of all time. My favorite character was the mother, since she was an architect, just like I wanted to be. Anyway Grandpa Alfred was so pissed that a Canadian Team won the World Series in 1992, and he wanted payback.
VIRGINIA: Kids, you all ready?
HEATHER: Yes, Mom.
TED: Yep.
VIRGINIA: Okay let's get going!
ALFRED: Yep let's head out! Ted, please turn off that TV…Hey! That's my favorite show! That dad is hilarious! Anyways, it's a long drive to that aspiring yuppie son's native land.
TED: [clicking off TV] I still don't understand why we're going all the way to Toronto to watch a baseball game!
ALFRED: It's the Indians versus the Blue Jays! I think we have a good chance of beating them.
FUTURE TED VOICEOVER: We didn't. Toronto would go on to win the World Series for the second time in a row that fall against the Phillies.
TED: The Indians are not doing well this year, especially after that tragic accident with those two pitchers…
FUTURE TED VOICEOVER: Earlier that year, two pitchers, Steve Olin and Tim Crews, got killed in an alcohol-related boating accident in Florida. That meant a grim future for the team that year.
ALFRED: Come on, Ted. Don't be so negative. Anything could happen. Would it be fun to see the Blue Jays humiliated in their home country? What the hell is a Canadian team doing in the Major League anyway?
TED: I guess.
ALFRED: Also, we're gonna be international travelers! We're traveling to a foreign country!
TED: That's not a real country! That's our 51st state!
ALFRED: Come on, it'll be fun! And you can explore the architecture of the CN Tower and their City Hall.
TED: Well, that's true. Anyway, I don't have much of a choice. Let's go.
[family leaves house with suitcases]
FUTURE TED VOICEOVER: And so began my first trip to your stepmom's home and native land.
End of Act 2.