Frozen Together Chapter 6

The next day, when Anna knocked, Elsa didn't answer. The following day, her only response was, "Please stay away!" It wasn't until two days later that Elsa was finally willing to "build a snowman" again.

They sat in their chairs and stared at each other. Elsa was wearing her gloves again, which Anna took as a bad sign. There was moisture on the wall, which probably meant that part of the wall had been covered in ice a few minutes ago. Anna had just about reached her breaking point, not just with curiosity, but with frustration that her relationship with her sister was going nowhere. Maybe it was time to venture out onto the ice and see if it was strong enough to support her.

"Are we just going to sit here?" Elsa finally asked. "You could do that anywhere."

"I'd rather do it here," Anna said quietly, and that was the truth.

"Just staring at each other isn't the best way I can think of to spend a morning," Elsa replied.

"The only one who can change that is you," Anna said, trying not to sound like she was looking for a confrontation.

"And what am I supposed to do?" Elsa exclaimed, throwing her gloved hands into the air. A light snow began to fall.

"What are you supposed to do?" Anna burst out. "You could talk to me! Talk to me about this!" She waved her hand at the snow, which began falling thicker. "Talk to me about the snowman you made by waving your fingers at it!" She leaned toward Elsa. "Talk to me about what frightens you so much! Please, I'm begging you, just talk to me!"

Elsa retreated toward the corner. The wind was rising; the room suddenly felt ten degrees colder. "No!" she screamed desperately. "I can't! Please get out while you can!"

"I'm not leaving this time!" Anna shouted back, rising from her chair. "You've got to tell me what this is all about!"

Elsa began to cry. "I can't! I can't face that memory again!" She knelt and cowered in the corner.

Anna knelt down about five feet away. "Elsa, I think you face that memory, whatever it is, every day! Hiding from it isn't working!" She got no response. "Elsa, I love you! I want to help!"

"You can't help!" her sister sobbed. "No one can help! Just leave me alone! I don't want to hurt you!"

"I know that! So don't hurt me!" Anna exclaimed. "If you tell me the truth, what's the worst thing that could happen?"

Elsa didn't answer. She was wide-eyed and almost out of control. Ice was creeping around the walls from where she was leaning against them. The room had grown so cold, Anna was starting to shiver. Snow was coming down so heavily that she couldn't see the windows. If she tried to smooth things over, the storm would cease, but the real problem would remain unknown and unsolved.

"Elsa, if you can't tell me, then can you show me somehow?"

They were both shaking – Anna from the cold, Elsa from fear. The older girl took off a glove with some difficulty, and with a trembling hand, she pointed into the middle of the room. The snow whirled and flew together there, forming a large lump that quickly reshaped itself into a likeness of... something. Anna stared at the lump as it became a sculpture of some kind. It grew more detailed with each passing second, as clusters of snowflakes attached themselves to it or flew away from it. As Elsa focused on it, the wind died and the room temperature rose slightly, but the snow was still cascading down all around them.

It seemed to be a life-sized snow statue of two young children together. Anna stared at it. As the last few details emerged, she spun to stare at Elsa.

"That's us! That's us when we were little!" she burst out. "I'm sleeping, and you're cradling my head... what does this mean?"

Elsa shook her head. "No," she moaned. "That was the day I almost killed you!" She fell face-down on the snowy carpet, crying uncontrollably. The wind began blowing again.

Anna clamped down on the urge to ask fifty thousand questions. Her sister was almost out of control. Putting more pressure on her couldn't accomplish anything, and Elsa was too far gone to think about flowers. Anna's next urge was to give her sister a hug and tell her it was okay, but getting too close when she was like this always made things much worse. This was a storm she would probably have to ride out. But she still had one option left that might do some good.

"Do you want to build a snowman? I think that's all that we can do.
"In all those years when we were on our own, I felt so all alone! I only wanted you!
"And now we're getting closer, and yet we're not. You won't treat me like we're kin.
"Do you want to build a snowman? Let me help you build a snowman.
"Let me in."

The wind slowly died. It was still cold in the room, and the snow was coming down as thick as Anna had ever seen it outdoors. Elsa slowly rose and walked hesitantly over to stand next to the statue, then sat down heavily next to it. A tear rolled down her cheek. It froze before it hit the floor.

"I was never supposed to talk about this," she said slowly, tightly. "But Father and Mother are gone, and you already know some of the truth. There's no reason to hold it back from you anymore.

"I was born with power over snow and ice," she began. "No one knew how or why. I think Mother and Father found out about it when I froze the bottle they were trying to feed me. When I was old enough to understand, they told me to never do anything with my ability outside the palace grounds. But we could have all kinds of fun with it together on the inside. You loved it when I used my powers for you!

"I'd do little tricks for you with ice crystals." She opened her clenched fist, and a two-inch snowflake appeared in her palm. Anna couldn't help smiling in delight. The big flake spun for a few seconds like a ballerina, then fractured into six smaller flakes that also spun and danced in her hand before they broke into thirty-six even smaller ones. Those flakes, which were still much bigger than any normal snowflake, twirled in complex patterns, then burst into tiny ice crystals that were quickly lost in the falling snow.

"I'd make Olaf, and we'd make him talk. We'd skate all over the floor. We'd play all kinds of games! One that you really liked was 'tickle bumps.' You'd jump, and I'd make a snow pile appear so you wouldn't hit the floor. You'd bounce from pile to pile... you had so much fun... I did, too..." She broke off. Anna waited.

Elsa stared at the floor. "One morning, when I was seven and you were four, we were playing in the ballroom... you started jumping from the snow piles, and... you were going so fast, I couldn't keep up with you... I slipped on the ice... you jumped again... I knew it was going to be bad..."

"You let me fall?" Anna asked quietly.

"I SHOT YOU IN THE HEAD!" Elsa screamed. Her sister started back from the sheer intensity of her outburst. Elsa hid her face in her hands and rocked from side to side, sobbing hysterically. "Oh, Anna! Oh, Anna! What I wouldn't give to take back that moment! What I wouldn't give to be able to think about you, and not see THIS!" She waved her hand at the snow statue without looking; it vanished in a thick puff of snowflakes.

"I don't remember any of this," Anna said hesitantly.

"You were unconscious," Elsa finally managed to say. "You were so cold! You got that white streak in your hair – that's where that came from. I couldn't wake you up. I'd never been so scared in my life! Father and Mother took us to the trolls, and they –"

"Trolls?!" Anna couldn't help exclaiming.

"They healed you, and they took all the memories of my ability out of your mind. They said it was for the best. They said I had to learn to control my power... but I never did. It just got stronger." She closed her eyes and shook her head miserably. "I still can't control it." Her eyelashes glistened with tears.

Anna scooted a foot closer to her. "And you spent all those years isolated, because you felt guilty?"

"I didn't want to let it happen again!" Elsa burst out. "Don't you understand, Anna? I did it for you! I did it to protect you! I did it to keep you safe... from me!"

"But... it was an accident!" Anna stammered. "I know you didn't mean it. I forgive you!"

Elsa stared at her. The snowfall slackened somewhat. "Anna... that helps. Thank you. But... I still can't control the cold that comes out of me. It would take just one unguarded moment... Father knew where to find the trolls, but I don't. If I hurt you again, no one could help you."

"But... you don't want to hurt me!" Anna questioned her. "Right?"

"Anna, you still don't understand!" Rows of icicles were rising out of the carpet, forming a pointy wall a foot high, surrounding her as she sat on the floor. "It has nothing to do with what I want. I really can't control it! I could hurt you... I could kill you... without even meaning to!"

"And that's what you're so afraid of," Anna whispered. Elsa nodded slowly, then hugged her knees and sobbed hopelessly.

Anna tried to figure this out. She truly had no memory of what Elsa was talking about, but it was obviously very real to her. She let her right-hand braid trail through her hand, and gazed at the white streak that had been there for as long as she could remember.

"Elsa," she said softly, "nothing you've ever done, and nothing you ever could do, is going to change the fact that you're my sister, or the fact that I love you. That moment in the past must have been awful, but it's in the past now. This is today. There aren't any tickle bumps here, and there aren't any trolls. It's just you and me.

"Today, you don't have to catch me when I'm falling. You don't have to do anything with your ability at all. All I want us to do is walk up and down the halls a few times. You don't have to do anything dramatic or powerful; just put one foot in front of the other." She stood and gently added, "Now step over those icicles, and come take my hand. Please."

Elsa wiped her tears with her gloved hand and shook her head. "Anna, you're too trusting! You need to be afraid of me! It's for your own good!"

"No, I won't be afraid of you!" Anna replied, firmly but as gently as she could. "It's for your own good! You're my sister, not a monster! I won't run from you!"

Elsa stared at her. How could Anna have so little common sense, not to know danger when she was staring right at it? Her sister had dressed warmly, like she usually did for these visits. The snow was piling up on her shoulders and her bonnet, but she didn't seem to notice it, or think it strange that she was becoming snow-covered indoors. How could she make Anna see reason?

Anna stared back. There wasn't a trace of menace or threat about her sister, or even in the snow that was building up around them. This story she told... it sounded unbelievable. But Elsa's power was real, and her fear was real. She brushed the snow off her shoulders and her head – there was a lot of it, she realized – and beckoned with her hand.

"Come on, Elsa. It's just a short walk."

Elsa looked into Anna's eyes. So trusting... so naïve...

...so loving...

She rose, stepped over the icicle wall, and took her sister's hand.

As they stepped though the open door, Elsa gestured behind her back. The icicles shrank into the floor and disappeared.