Sorry for the late update. School, college entrance exams, a secret project, writer's block, and more have kept me from bringing this to you on time. I apologize for the delay.

Onto the reviews. Most have been the usual "Side comment + 'Please update!'" deal (which I appreciate), so I won't have to go into detail on those aside from the usual thank you. Now, one reviewer said that Elsie should have a crush on one of the BtT dudes. To be honest, I don't think that will work out so well. Nice idea, but I think Elsie's hero worship of Keima would get in the way of any possible romance between her and a BtB character. It would make a good omake, though.

Disclaimer still in effect

Enjoy!

Chapter Thirty-Seven: Me, Shouko, and Door Slamming

Keima was running out of breath, out of time, and out of luck. Tendrils of deadly lightning were being shot at the boy, each spiral of death cutting him off from escaping. The boy jumped, ducked, and slid under the lethal shots, as he ran away from the source: Shouko Kirishima. "Resistance is futile, Akihisa Yoshii."

"How is she shooting laser beams out of a stun gun!?" cried Keima, ducking another blast. Just as it sailed over his head and hit the wall in front of him, Keima put his foot out, pressed hard on the wall, and kicked off, using the wall as a springboard to change direction at a fast pace. He shot at Shouko, who flinched out of surprise. Ducking a stab meant to shock his belly button to death, Keima pressed past the girl... only to trip over a rock, skidding across the stone path. "Damn... felled by a pebble."

Keima looked up, the sight of death - Shouko Kirishima - hovering above him. Arms crossed, stun guns set to "kill", Shouko looked like one of those girls you'd see in horror movies like the Ring: deathly terrifying.

"Sayonara, Yoshii."

Keima fell into darkness's warm embrace.

Keima was in a dark room with no idea on where he actually was. Luckily, unlike the Ares incident, he wasn't pinned down by anything, so he was free to get off of the bed and flick on the light switch... and sigh. All around the room were risque shots of Shouko that could've fit in perfectly in a men's magazine. Surprisingly, the poses, angles, and settings were familiar to the gamer. "Oh... this kitchen scene between Aozaki and Kagurazaka is from Flannad... and this one's from Sea! The accuracy of these photos to the source material is amazing!"

"I'm glad you appreciate it." Keima looked around the room to find the source of the noise. Tucked in the corner of the big bedroom was a speaker. "Take a good look at your surroundings."

Keima did exactly that. Ignoring the Shouko posters, the room looked just like your average hotel suite, only souped up with a bunch of kinky things. Whips hung on the walls, the heart-shaped bed looked as soft as a cloud and as smooth as silk, and a big mirror was placed facing the bed so that it was easy to see any... "nightly" activities: all traits of a love hotel. "You shall remain here for seven days, with only me as company. I hope you enjoy your stay, Akihisa."

As the sound of the mic shutting off hit his ears, Keima tisked. "Great. Just when I need to mobilize does a Heroine lock me up. Real... I loathe you." Sighing, Keima decided to plan an escape. First things first: check the door. Keima went over too the door, grasped the doorknob, and twisted. He was met with no resistance, so it wasn't locked! Smirking at Shouko's ignorance in keeping a hostage... well... hostage, Keima opened the door... and was tackled down. Shouko, clad in a racy halter bra and white panties, pinned down Keima's weak frame.

"You like, Akihisa?" said Shouko, pressing her soft and lithe body up against Keima's.

"I'd like it better if I could talk to Diana first," replied Keima. Shouko's response was to curl back, bringing Keima with her, and kick up against Keima's abdomen, sending him crashing into the bed. Before he could regain his breath, the Host was upon him again, this time with her back to him. She arched her back, making sure that her curves and the milky skin of her back were in full view. "I *cough* take that as a 'no'."

"You aren't very cooperative," said Shouko, who turned around to face her man. Leaning down onto his body, she put her face into the crook of his neck, her breath tickling him. "Oh well, we do have about ten thousand seventy-five minutes left, so I guess we could take it... slow, if you want."

"Shouko... please... for me?"

"...Sorry, Akihisa. I'm afraid I can't do that."

"Er... good evening, Miharu!" said Elsie, opening the door for the lesbian. She walked in, her appearance changing with each step. Orange hair and golden eyes faded to black, bringing a more formal air to the girl. With the addition of a sizable bust and a secretary-like pair of glasses, she looked like a different person altogether. "Eh! H-Hello, Mercury!"

"I don't have time for banter," said Mercury, untying the ribbons in her hair and letting it all flow down. Wrapping it up again pony-tail style, Mercury continued to walk till she made it to the sofa, plopping herself down with discipline and care in mind. "I need to talk to Keima now."

"Kami Nii-sama hasn't returned yet," said Elsie, sighing. She clutched her broom in an attempt to stifle her anxiety. "We're all worried. Haqua's sharpening her blade, Shiori's drowning herself into her novel, and Kanon's meals have spontaneously combusted three times already. We're breaking down."

"Well that's too bad," said the Goddess with little sympathy, getting up. She hastily went for the door, surprising the li'l devil. "I have to go. May you have a good evening."

"Eh!? Where are you going, Mercury?" asked Elsie. "You still haven't eaten dinner!" Mercury turned around, a cold mask ever-present on her face. It chilled Elsie to the bone. Mercury was Miharu's exact opposite. One was passionate; one was cold. One operated on emotion; one worked on logic. Two different beings sharing the same body should be a disaster, yet they seem perfectly fine. How?

"I have to find Keima now, Elsie. If we want to fell the Fallen Goddesses, we need to coöperate and strike very soon," said Mercury. walking out the door and slamming it closed with a harsh "Bang!".

"~Auah! If only Kami Nii-sama was here, then he could try to explain... her to me. Oh, where are you, Kami-sama?"

Footnotes:

"...Aozaki (Okazaki) and Kagurazaka (Sakagami) from Flannad...": Parody of Clannad using names from Mahou Tsukai no Yoru and Mahou Sensei Negima

"...this one's from Sea!": Parody of Air.