NoName-chan: Welp, as sad as it is, I still don't own DGM. Trust me, if I did, there would be a lot more Crack, Humor, Romance, and Shovels.
Allen: Thank God you don't…
NoName-chan: *Hits Allen over the head with my shovel* OH, SHUT UP! Oh, and I also don't own any of the songs that may or may not be in this Episode-Chapter-Thingy~! ^^
…
*Horrible Game Show Intro runs its horrible course. We open up to the same stage setting as last time, with me and Ben on the red couch, the contestants on the blue couch, and a table in the middle*
NoName-chan: *grins* Welcome back for Episode-Chapter-Thingy 2 of D Gray-Show~! I'm your hostess, NoName-chan-
Kanda: They already know that, dipshit.
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* SHUT UP! Anyways, after receiving a total of two votes on the subject, I have decided to allow Ben-kun to continue hosting with me~! So, here's my Co-Host, Ben-kun~! *gestures to Ben*
Ben-kun: *smiles and waves*
NoName-chan: And here are our contestants that I'm not going to name because if you don't already know their names, you shouldn't be watch-reading this! *gestures to the people on the blue couch*
Lavi, Lenalee, Road: *smile and wave*
Kanda: *glares at everything*
Allen: *notices that Tyki's missing* Hey, where's Tyki?
NoName-chan: *finally notices that Tyki's not there* Huh... Good question...
Tyki: *rushes in panting* Sorry I'm late! I was dropping the Earl off at Soccer Practice, and- *makes eye contact with me*
NoName-chan and Tyki: *tense*
Lavi: What's wrong with them?
Road: That's... Actually a good question...
NoName-chan: We had a little... encounter last night that we'd both like to forget...
Tyki: *smirks* you looked really funny with white stuff all over your face, though.
Ben-kun, Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Lenalee, Road: *gape* WHAT?!
NoName-chan and Tyki: *stare at them curiously* What?
Allen: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, TYKI, SHE'S ONLY THIRTEEN! YOU'RE LIKE, FIFTY!
Tyki: FIFTY?!
Road: AHEM! We already discussed ages in the first Episode-Chapter-Thingy, so let's focus on the main topic here: WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?!
NoName-chan: Well, you see...
*Flashback*
Tyki: *back at the (now vacant) TV set at night because he forgot his cell phone or something, wandering through the halls in the dark*
NoName-chan: *walking down the hallway holding a few cookies and a glass of milk*
Tyki: *blindly runs into me, causing me to drop the cookies and splash the milk all over my face*
NoName-chan: *SHRIEK* MY COOKIES! *Starts swinging the shovel at Tyki* DIE, YOU BASTARD!
Tyki: *SCREAM. Runs for his life*
NoName-chan: *Chases him in fury*
*Flashback End*
Allen: Wait, so you guys DIDN'T have drunk sex?
NoName-chan and Tyki: *Stare at Allen curiously* Of course not...
Ben-kun, Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Lenalee, Road: *Sigh in relief*
NoName-chan: Um... Okay then... Anyways, the security guards eventually caught us, and that was a difficult situation to explain.
Tyki: Yeah. I mean, how do you explain a 13-year-old girl with milk all over her face and a deadly shovel in hand chasing a screaming 26-year-old man around the studio at 3 in the morning?
NoName-chan: The point is, it was really awkward and we'd rather just forget about it.
Lavi: Um... Sure. Just answer one more question: WHY THE HELL WERE YOU EATING MILK AND COOKIES ALONE IN THE STUDIO AT THREE IN THE MORNING?!
NoName-chan and Allen: Midnight snack, obviously.
Lavi: *sighs in defeat*
Kanda: Wait, why the hell did she come here for that?
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* BECAUSE I'M THE HOSTESS AND I DO WHAT I WANT, NOW SHUT THE FUCK UP.
Ben-kun: My question is what kind of cookies were they and where can I get some? :3
NoName-chan: Chocolate chip, and *HIIIISSSSSSSSSSSS* STAY AWAY FROM MY COOKIES!
Allen: D-did she just hiss?
Lavi: Yup. That's the second time since this Show-Fanfiction-Thingy first aired.
Allen: I'm scared.
Lavi: Me, too.
Ben-kun: Rawr! :3
Allen: Is that "I love you" in dinosaur?
Ben-kun: Nope... Have you not seen Jurassic Park? It means "I'M GOING TO FUCKING EAT YOU!" :3
Allen: O_O
NoName-chan: *hits Allen over the head with the shovel* Honestly, Allen! How stupid are you?
Allen: ASDFGHJKL THAT FUCKING HURT!
NoName-chan: GOOD. Anyways, Ben-kun, you aren't going to eat us.
Ben-kun: And why not?
NoName-chan: Because I have THIS! *holds up my shovel*
Ben-kun: *YELP* Point taken!
NoName-chan: *grins* Good.
Tyki: Am I the only one who's a little bit concerned about the fact that he, an 18-year-old human, just threatened to EAT US?!
Allen: Of course we're concerned. But we also know that there's nothing he can do to hurt us.
Ben-kun: Is that so? *Gives Allen a taco and grins* Hey, Allen don't throw that taco on the ground... trust me X3
Allen: *shrugs and throws it on the ground*
Taco: OUCH! NoName-chan! DX
NoName-chan: *GASP* HOW DARE YOU ABUSE A PERFECTLY GOOD TACO?! *beats the shit out of Allen with my shovel*
Allen: I WAS WRONG! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I WAS WRONG!
Ben-kun: *smirks* Damn straight~! X3
Lavi: Am I the only one concerned that the taco was talking?...
Lenalee: ...
Lavi: *Sighs* I guess so.
Taco: In your face Lavi X3
Lavi: IT TALKED AGAIN!
NoName-chan: *hits Lavi over the head with the shovel* SHUT IT!
Lavi: B-but...
NoName-chan: *death glare*
Lavi: *whimpers*
Allen: Wait, hold on a second... WHAT WAS TYKI SAYING WHEN HE FIRST WALKED IN?
Tyki: That I was sorry for being late?
Allen: No, the other thing!
Tyki: That I was taking the Earl to Soccer Practice before I came here?
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Lenalee: THE EARL PLAYS SOCCER?! O.O
Road: Um, yeah. What's the big deal?
Lenalee: Well, um, nothing really... That just seems so unlikely, with his figure and all...
*ELSEWHERE*
Earl: *sobs* I'll never be a soccer star...
*BACK WITH THE IMPORTANT PEOPLE*
NoName-chan: Anyways, let's begin today with... The Dare Round~!
Allen: So we're skipping the Question Round again?
NoName-chan: yup! ^^
Ben-kun: Why? O.o
NoName-chan: *hits Ben over the head with the shovel* BECAUSE SHUT UP! Anyways, let's get started~! ^^ *slip of paper with the dare written on it appears in my hand* Okay, this one's for Kanda! It reads:
"Kanda,
I dare you to give up Mugen and replace it with safety scissors for the remainder of the Episode-Chapter-Thingy.
~Magicsinger"
Kanda: *gapes in horror*
Lenalee: Who's Magicsinger? O.o
NoName-chan: The first viewer to send in suggestions without me begging, that's who~! ^^ Now, Kanda?
Kanda: NO WAY IN HELL!
NoName-chan: *grins* Suit yourself~ *start beating him with the shovel*
Kanda: OW! OW! OKAY, OKAY! *gives me Mugen*
NoName-chan: *grins and gives Kanda a pair of safety scissors* Perfect~ *starts laughing evilly*
Kanda: *rolls eyes* Okay, whatever, have fun with my blood.
NoName-chan: HAHAHAHA- wait, what?
Kanda: Remember Chapter 208? Mugen's made of my blood, you dumbass.
NoName-chan: ... *licks Mugen's blade*
Allen, Kanda, Lenalee, Lavi, Tyki: O.O
Ben-kun: ...Does it taste like blood?
NoName-chan: Actually, yes! ^^
Kanda: IT DOES?! O_O
Road: Wait, hold on! Let me try! *takes Mugen and licks it* Hmmmm... Yeah she's right! It does!
Ben-kun: Really? I wanna try! *takes Mugen and licks it* WOW, IT DOES!
Kanda: *tick mark* GIVE ME BACK MY SWORD, YOU DIPSHITS! *swipes Mugen from Ben's hands*
NoName-chan: NOT UNTIL THE END OF THE DARE! *takes it back*
Kanda: *gives up and starts angrily muttering to himself*
Lavi: So, are we just completely ignoring the fact that they were just licking a katana made of Kanda's blood?
Lenalee: I guess so.
NoName-chan: Anyways, let's mix it up and do Lenalee's dare next~! *piece up paper materializes in my hand* Alright, it reads:
"Lenalee,
I dare you to tell everyone about your secret life~
~Road"
Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Lenalee, Tyki: *stare at Road* ...
Road: *nonchalantly sitting*
Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Lenalee, Tyki: IT'S FROM YOU?
Road: Duh.
Allen: SINCE WHEN ARE WE ALLOWED TO SUBMIT DARES?!
NoName-chan: YOU aren't. But Road and Lenalee are.
Lavi: Are you sexist or something?
NoName-chan: A little bit~ I just tend to get along with girls better than guys.
Ben-kun: WHAT ABOUT ME?! D':
NoName-chan: *Hits Ben over the was with the shovel* YOU'RE THE EXCEPTION, NOW SHUT IT! Anyways, Lenalee?
Lenalee: *shrugs* I guess I'll have to reveal my secret sooner or later... The truth is, I have a secret life. *deep breath* I am Ronald McDonald.
Allen, Lavi, Kanda: We know -.-
Lenalee: *gasps* HOW?!
Kanda: *holds up a newspaper*
Lenalee: *reads it* um... Okay?
Lavi: *rolls eyes* Seriously? The headline is "Ronald McDonald Kicks Fat Guy Through Window With Fiery Boots." It wasn't that hard to guess.
Lenalee: Oh...
NoName-chan: Okay, now... Allen~! *slip of paper appears in my hand* It reads:
"Moyashi,
I dare you to legally change your name to Moyashi.
~Kanda"
Allen: *gapes in horror*
Lavi: Wait, I thought you said that Road and Lenalee were the only contestants allowed to submit suggestions! Why does Yuu-chan get to?!
Kanda: DON'T CALL ME THAT! *tries to stab Lavi with safety scissors, but fails*
Lavi: *grins* YUU-CHAN CAN'T IMPALE ME~! *glomps Kanda*
Kanda: WHAT THE-?! GET OFF, YOU DAMN RABBIT!
Lavi: NEVER!
Tyki: Wait, why IS Kanda allowed to submit dares?
NoName-chan: *tick mark* HE ISN'T! *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel*
Lavi: *gets hit in the face in the process and goes flying into the wall* OW! WHY'D YOU HIT ME?!
NoName-chan: BECAUSE YOU WERE IN THE WAY, AND YOU PROBABLY DESERVED IT! Anyways, Kanda isn't allowed to submit anything! So, Allen, congrats. You're off the hook for this one.
Allen: WOO HOO~!
Kanda: *growls in frustration*
NoName-chan: Now, let's try this AGAIN, shall we? *another slip of paper appears in my hand* This one reads:
"Beansprout,
I dare you to not complain about being called a beansprout for the rest of the Episode. If you complain, you get hit with the shovel.
~myangelicladyofdarkness"
Allen: *gapes in horror again*
Kanda: ... HA!
NoName-chan: *sweat drops* Wow, apparently Allen is destined to be called Beansprout today... *shrugs* Whatever! You heard the lady, Moyashi!
Allen: *weeps*
NoName-chan: Right, next dare~! This one's for... Tyki! *slip of paper appears in my hand* It reads:
"Oi, Pervert,
I dare you to play with Road.
~myangelicladyofdarkness"
Tyki: *gapes in horror* W-WHAT?
Kanda: *pats Tyki's back sympathetically* Good luck. You'll need it.
Road: *grins* HOORAY~! Let's go, Pervy! *drags Tyki out of the room*
Tyki: *cries and screams for help*
Anybody that could possibly help Tyki: *ignores*
NoName-chan: Right... Next! Lavi~! *slip of paper appears in my hand* It reads:
"Bunny-boy,
I dare you to call Yuu-chan girly.
~myangelicladyofdarkness"
Lavi: *gapes*
Lenalee: Geez, how many suggestions did myangelicladyofdarkness submit? O.o
NoName-chan: A lot. And for that, I'm forever grateful ^^ Anyways, Lavi?
Kanda: *glares at Lavi* Don't you fucking dare.
NoName-chan: Lavi, do it or face my wrath *holds up shovel*
Lavi's thoughts: 'Hm... What's worse: facing the wrath of Yuu-chan or NoName-chan?...'
Lavi: ... Yuu-chan, you're girly~
Kanda: WHY YOU LITTLE-
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR YOU TO MAUL LAVI! MOVING ON! Next Dare's, of course, for Road~! ^^
Lenalee: But she's not here...
NoName-chan: Don't worry, she will be~! ^^
Lenalee: How do you know? O.o
NoName-chan: Because I can do this: *grins* ROAD~! PEOPLE ARE DYING~!
Road: *bursts into the room dragging a horrified Tyki, who's dressed up like a ballerina* SOMEONE'S DYING?! WHERE?!
NoName-chan: Sorry, Road! Nobody is yet! You just need to do your dare~! ^^;;;
Road: Oh, okay. Lay it on me~
Tyki: That's what she sai-
NoName-chan: *his Tyki over the head with the shovel* NO PERVINESS!
Tyki: OW!
NoName-chan: Anyways, *grins. Slip of paper appears in my hand* it reads:
"Road,
I dare you to destroy one of your Blackmail tapes.
~myangelicladyofdarkness"
Road: ... WHAT?!
NoName-chan: *crying* NO! OUR PRECIOUS BLACKMAIL!
Lenalee: It's okay, guys! I made copies of all the tapes! ^^
NoName-chan and Road: *immediately calm down* Really? Okay then!
Road: *smashes a tape labeled "Allen Shower Singing Blackmail: Volume 1"*
NoName-chan: Alright~! That concludes the Dare Round~! ^^ Now, to mix it up, let's go ahead and do the Torture Round~!
Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Tyki: *GROAN*
NoName-chan: Alright, first up for the Wheel of Torture will be... ALLEN~!
Allen: *sighs and spins the wheel*
NoName-chan: *unfolds piece of paper* Alright, Allen, your torture is...
"Be locked in a room alone with NoName-chan for 10 minutes."
Allen: *gapes* THE HORROR!
Lavi: Who wrote THAT?
NoName-chan: That's... Actually a good question. But, I DON'T WANNA HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS DIPSHIT FOR 10 MINUTES! KANDA, SAVE ME! I'M TIRED FROM A LACK OF SLEEP DUE TO HAVING TO CHASE TYKI ALL NIGHT! T_T
Kanda: Che. I don't care.
NoName-chan: And I'm sore from cheer practice! T_T
Kanda: I still don't give a shit.
NoName-chan: And I still haven't found a place to hide the body! T_T
Kanda: I don't car- Wait, WHAT?!
NoName-chan: Nothing~
Ben-kun: Aww, NoName-chan~! If you're tired, just take your energy pills~ ^^
NoName-chan: I can't! I've already taken my prescribed dose for today! T_T
Ben-kun: OH NO! THE PLAN IS RUINED! D:
NoName-chan: Not quite yet, Ben-kun! I still have my secret weapon... *holds up a Diet Coke*
Ben-kun: *eyes widen* B-but NoName-chan, that's too much power! 0.0
NoName-chan: Don't worry! I can handle it... I think! *chugs the Diet Coke*
Ben-kun: YOU THINK?! *shakes head* This might end badly...
NoName-chan: *starts shaking uncontrollably* I-I FEEL... *starts bouncing of the walls* WOO HOO~!
Ben-kun: And it begins... 0.0 CURSE YOU, DIET COKE! DX
NoName-chan: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA~! I BET I CAN EAT THIS WHOLE SANDWICH! *holds up a sandwich and throws it at Ben's face* HAHAHA SANDWICH FACE! OMG I SHOULD TOTALLY GO START A BUSINESS! A FISHING BUSINESS! I'LL GO GET THE HARPOONS~! *starts running away* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA~!
Ben-kun: *Wipes the sandwich off his face and stares at me* Really!? O.0
NoName-chan: HARPOONS~! IMPALING FISH~! *sprints toward the door*
Ben-kun: SOMEBODY STOP HER, QUICK! O.O
Kanda: Che. *grabs me by the back of the neck and throws me into a small empty room and closes the door*
Ben-kun: *sighs in relief*
Lavi: Wait... What just happened?
Ben-kun: She drank a Diet Coke.
Lavi: Well, yeah, but why did she spaz out like that?
Ben-kun: Diet Coke has caffeine in it.
Lavi: And?
Ben-kun: She has a very low tolerance for caffeine and sugar.
Jen-chan: *appears out of nowhere* Yeah, once I was at her house while she was making a cake, and she ate half a teaspoon of frosting. She was bouncing off the walls for 20 minutes. The worst part is, we were in the kitchen and she was right next to a set of steak knives...
Lavi: O_O
Kanda: Wait, wait, hold on! Who the hell are you?
Jen-chan: I'm Jen-chan. I'm another one of NoName-chan's best friends. I'm here to fill in for her as hostess while she's on her sugar high.
Ben-kun: WHAT?! I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONE WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO FILL IN FOR HER!
Jen-chan: Originally, you were. But after the first Episode-Chapter-Thingy, she gave me a call and told me that I'd be filling in instead. Something about you not understanding the difference between a dare and a question? I dunno.
Ben-kun: THAT WAS AN ACCIDENT! DX
Jen-chan: I DON'T CARE! Anyways, I don't watch-read this Show-Fanfiction-Thingy, so what are we supposed to be doing?
Ben-kun: Huh? Oh yeah! *grins* Allen has to stay in that room with NoName-chan for 10 minutes.
Allen: *gapes* YOU'RE STILL GONNA MAKE ME GO IN THERE?!
Ben-kun: Duh. :3 Now, GO! *pushes Allen into the NoName-chan Cage Room and closes the door*
Tyki: So how long do you think he's gonna last in there?
Road: He'll be lucky if he reaches 2 minutes...
*10 seconds later*
Allen: *comes running back onto the stage. There's a large bruise on his face and he looks like he's seen a ghost* GUYS, NONAME-CHAN'S GONE.
Ben-kun, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: WHAT?!
Jen-chan and Kanda: I don't care.
Road: What do you mean, she's GONE?!
Allen: I MEAN, I was pushed into the room, I looked at NoName-chan, she grinned, hit me in the face with her shovel, and JUMPED OUT THE WINDOW INTO THE STREETS!
Ben-kun, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: WHAT?!
Lenalee: Is she okay?!
Allen: I HAVE NO IDEA! All I know is that she jumped, and I ran to you guys!
Lavi: Wait, aren't we on, like, the 20th floor?! SHE'S PROBABLY DEAD!
Jen-chan: LOL.
Tyki: You know, for somebody that's supposed to be her best friend, you're incredibly mean to her.
Jen-chan: *smirks* I know. But I think she's annoying and the only reason that we're even still friends is because we both know too much. I would gladly shove her off a cliff into shark-infested waters without a second thought.
Ben-kun, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: *gape in horror*
Kanda: ... Will you marry me?
Jen-chan: And get mauled to death by thousands of fangirls? FUCK NO.
Road: GUYS. WE'RE GETTING OFF TOPIC. First things first, we need to find out if NoName-chan is even alive. So let's go out and look for her, alright?
Ben-kun, Allen, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: *nod in agreement* okay!
Jen-chan: You guys have fun with that. I'm going to stay here with Kanda and plot people's deaths.
Road: *shrugs* Suit yourself.
Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: *sprint out of the room*
Allen: *starts to head towards the door*
Ben-kun: *stops him by grabbing his shoulder* Hey, Allen?
Allen: *looks at Ben* Yeah?
Ben-kun: *holds up a butcher knife* If anything bad happens to NoName-chan, I'll hold you responsible, and I WILL kill you. Got it? Good. *Leaves room*
Allen: *gapes in horror* WHAT THE HELL?!
Road: Oh yeah, that... Well, you see, even though she abuses him CONSTANTLY, Ben-kun has a bit of a sister complex over NoName-chan whenever she's hurt. He isn't a scientist like Komui, so he won't build any giant robots, but he has other ways of showing his brotherly love. Many of those ways involving some sort of knife or other sharp object.
Allen: *shivers*
Road: Anyways, let's go! *leaves room with Allen*
Jen-chan: Alright, they're gone. So who is it you need help killing?
Kanda: That stupid rabbit, Lavi. And it's not so much the killing that's the problem as it is hiding the body.
Jen-chan: Don't worry, I watch Criminal Minds. I can help. *grins*
Kanda: Good. *grins*
*OUTSIDE THE BUILDING*
Lavi: So how do we figure out where NoName-chan landed?
Allen: *points at a large crater-like indent on a nearby sidewalk* That's probably it...
Lenalee: Well, if that's where she landed, then considering the fact that there's no blood or body, I'd say that she survived.
Ben-kun, Allen, Road: *sigh in relief*
Lavi: Wait, if that's where she landed, then where is she now?
Tyki: And is she okay? I mean, did she break any bones or have to go to the ER or something?
*My loud laughter is heard echoing from a distance*
Lenalee: Um, yeah, I think she's fine. As to finding out where she is, let's all split up to look for her. Meet back up here in an hour, okay?
Ben-kun, Allen, Lavi, Road, Tyki: *nod in agreement and all take off in different directions*
*1 hour later*
Ben-kun: *bursts into the stage room carrying an unconscious me*
Jen-chan and Kanda: *quickly hide their murder plans* WE WEREN'T DOING ANYTHING.
Allen, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: *run into the room shortly after*
Jen-chan: So, how'd it go?
Road: NoName-chan somehow survived the fall without any injuries-
Jen-chan: Damn it.
Road: -She then ran around town causing a lot of caffeine-induced havoc. We all split up to find her, and eventually, Ben-kun did.
Jen-chan: Wow. *looks at Ben* How'd you do it?
Ben-kun: *smiles* As NoName-chan's big brotherly figure, I knew the one thing I could lure her in with; the one thing she couldn't resist no matter what.
Jen-chan: And what was that?
Ben-kun: *holds up a taco* A Taco.
Jen-chan: Um... Okay then... So why is she unconscious?
Ben-kun: *smiles lovingly* She got all tuckered out~ ^^
NoName-chan: *snores softly, snuggling up to Ben's chest*
Ben-kun: D'AAAAWWWWW she's the cutest little sister ever~! X3 Especially when she's sleeping. She's all calm and peaceful, and-
NoName-chan: *eyes suddenly shoot wide open* NO ONE SEES THE WIZARD! *Punches Ben in the face*
Ben-kun: *drops me* OW! DX
NoName-chan: Eh? What happened? The last thing I remember is drinking a Diet Coke, and- *sees Jen-chan* JEN-CHAN~!
Jen-chan: Oh shit...
NoName-chan: *glomps Jen-chan* OMG JEN-CHAN IT'S YOU I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN SO LONG HOW ARE YOU DOING OMGOMGOMG I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE HERE PLEASE STAY WITH ME FOREVER I LOVE YOU SO MUCH~!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: *gape in shock* WHAT THE HELL?!
Road: Calm down, this is perfectly normal. NoName-chan just tends to get a bit hyper when Jen-chan's around, so random outbursts like this are common.
Jen-chan: *pries me off of her* FOR THE LAST TIME, YOU SAW ME YESTERDAY, I'M THE SAME AS I ALWAYS AM, I'M ONLY HERE BECAUSE YOU TOLD ME TO STEP IN FOR YOU IF NECESSARY, I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR SO YOU CAN SEE ME ANY TIME YOU WANT, AND JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, I DO NOT LOVE YOU!
NoName-chan: *reglomps Jen-chan* OH, JEN-CHAN~!
Tyki: Isn't this a Show-Fanfiction-Thingy? Why are we wasting time like this?
NoName-chan: *suddenly snaps back into hostess mode* You're right! Jen-chan, get the fuck out.
Jen-chan: Gladly. *looks at Kanda one last time, silently mouthing the words "Call me and we'll continue"
Kanda: *nods his head in agreement*
Jen-chan: *leaves*
NoName-chan: Alright, so how did Allen's torture go?
Road: He was in there for about 10 seconds before he ran back out panicking because you had apparently hit him with your shovel and jumped out the window. Then we embarked on a search for you, and Ben-kun managed to lure you back with a Taco.
NoName-chan: WOW. *Grins* That was one hell of a sugar high~! XD But, in other words, Allen still hasn't completed his torture?
Road: Nope.
NoName-chan: *sadistic grin* Well, then, come along Allen~
Allen: *whimpers*
Lavi: Wait, if Ben-kun has a sister complex, doesn't that mean...?
Ben-kun: *enters Komui mode* NONAME-CHAN! DX
NoName-chan: Oh shit.
Ben-kun: *Hugs me tightly* DON'T GO WITH ALLEN! STAY HERE! DX
NoName-chan: *pries him off* No, I've got to do the torture!
Ben-kun: *Cries and hugs my leg tightly* NOOO...LET ROAD DO IT INSTEAD! DX
NoName-chan: *tries to walk, but is dragging him along* I have to go, and that's FINAL!
Ben-kun: *Drags on the floor but is still holding tight* NOOO I WON'T LET YOU!
NoName-chan: WHY NOT?!
Ben-kun: BECAUSE HE'S PROBABLY A PERVERT AND WILL TRY TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU-
Allen: EW
Lavi: Can I reiterate the point that she's THIRTEEN?!
Ben-kun: -AND YOU COULD GET HURT! DX
NoName-chan: How? Allen can't hurt me. I have a shovel.
Allen: The fact that she has that shovel is enough to make me too afraid to even TRY.
Lavi and Tyki: Same here.
Kanda: Che. I'm not afraid.
NoName-chan: Liar -.-
Kanda: I'M NOT!
NoName-chan: Oh really? *holds up shovel*
Kanda: *YELP. Hides behind Lenalee*
NoName-chan: *smirks* That's what I thought.
Ben-kun: *Lets me go and tries not to cry* O-okay... just promise me you won't get hurt, alright?
NoName-chan: Don't worry, the only one who's going to get hurt here is Allen *sadistic grin*
Road: *Smiles* She makes me so proud~! :')
Ben-kun: *tears up happily* Me, too~! :')
NoName-chan: *Drags Allen into the NoName-chan Cage Room*
Allen: *screams for help*
NoName-chan: *slowly closes the door with a Cheshire cat grin*
Lenalee: Um... COMMERCIALS!
Random Camera Guy: I'm on it!
*COMMERCIAL SEQUENCE BEGIN*
"COPIES OF THE DESTROYED BLACKMAIL TAPE~!" *Road and NoName-chan order*
"LAVI BAIT~!" *Pineapplebombgirl orders*
"FASHIONABLE SCARVES~!" *Tyki orders*
"SHOVELS~!" *NoName-chan orders*
*COMMERCIAL SEQUENCE END*
*we open back up to our wonderful set. Allen and I are back on our respective couches along with everyone else, me grinning and Allen shaking in terror*
NoName-chan: *grins* AND WE'RE BACK~! Anyways, let's continue the torture round! Next up is... Kanda~!
Kanda: Che. *spins the wheel*
NoName-chan: *unfolds the paper* Alright, your torture is:
"Be called Yuu-chan for 24 hours without complaining."
Kanda: *eyes widen*
Lenalee: Who wrote THAT? O.o
NoName-chan: myangelicladyofdarkness, of course ;D
Lavi: *grins* YAYZ~! *glomps Kanda* YUU-CHAN~!
Kanda: *pushes Lavi away* DON'T CALL ME THA-
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* NO COMPLAINING!
Kanda: ASDFGHJKLFFUU$& UAGAHAUAIGAJIAGSLD?/!
NoName-chan: Moving on~! Next will be... Tyki~!
Tyki: *smiles fabulously and spins the wheel*
NoName-chan: *unfolds paper* Alright, Tyki, your torture is:
"Be locked in a room with Jasdevi, Road, myangelicladyofdarkness, and several sharp objects for 3 hours."
Tyki: *gapes in pure horror*
Ben-kun: *raises an eyebrow* Who wrote that? O.o
NoName-chan: *grins* myangelicladyofdarkness, of course.
Tyki: *whimpers*
Random Audience Member: TYKI, STOP SHAKING LIKE A LITTLE GIRL!
NoName-chan: *grins* You're really in for it now, Tyki. But, don't worry! ^^ We'll do that dare after the Episode-Chapter-Thingy is over because we don't have 3 hours to spare! So, Tyki, your safe(ish) for now~
Tyki: *cheers in joy*
NoName-chan: *hits Tyki over the head with the shovel* ZIP IT! Anyways, moving on~! ^^ Next will be... Lavi~!
Lavi: *spins the wheel*
NoName-chan: *unfolds the paper* Alright, Lavi, yours reads:
"Bunny-boy has to go out on a date with Pineapplebombgirl (kissing included. You're welcome, Pineapple.)"
Lavi: *eyes widen in horror*
Pineapplebombgirl: *squeals in pure joy from somewhere in the audience*
Lenalee: Who wrote tha-
NoName-chan: myangelicladyofdarkness ^^
Lenalee: Right, right...
NoName-chan: Anyways, LAVI! PIÑA! YOU HAVE A DATE TONIGHT!
Pineapplebombgirl: HOORAY~! :D THANK YOU SO MUCH, MYANGELICLADYOFDARKNESS~!
Lavi: Oh no... T.T
NoName-chan: Moving on~ Next, let's have... Lenalee~!
Lenalee: *spins the wheel*
NoName-chan: *unfolds the paper*
Alright, it reads-
Usagi-Twins: WAIT! Since this is going to be ours, can we say it?
NoName-chan: Sure~! ^^
Allen: Wait, how did they know it's be theirs-
NoName-chan: *hits Allen over the head with the shovel* SHUT UP!
Usagi-Twins: *walks onto the stage* In case you guy don't already know, our names are Candy and Choco.
Choco: This Torture is from me. Lenalee, spend 24 hours locked in a soundproof room with Komui.
Lenalee: *pales* Oh no...
NoName-chan: *grins* Oh yes~! However, since this is a time-consuming torture, we'll save it 'til after the show! Thanks for helping, Candy and Choco~! ^^
Usagi-Twins: No problem~! *sit back down*
NoName-chan: Alright, finally, Road~! ^^
Road: *grins and spins the wheel*
NoName-chan: *unfolds the paper* Okay, it reads:
"LEAVE ALLEN ALONE FOR ETERNITY!"
Road: *narrows eyes* Who the hell wrote that?
NoName-chan: Lucy Moon-Walker. Don't worry, though! Eternity is a REALLY long time, and REALLY-long-term tortures like this are bad for ratings, so I'm going to change "Eternity" to a month, 'Kay? ^^
Road: WOOT~!
NoName-chan: Anyways, that concludes the Torture Round~! Ben-kun, which Round should we do next? ^^
Ben-kun: How about... The Question Round~! B|
NoName-chan: B|
NoName-chan and Ben-kun: AAAAWWWW YEAH~!
Allen: What the-?
NoName-chan: *hits Allen over the head with the shovel* SHUT IT, BEANSPROUT.
Allen: *whimpers*
NoName-chan: Anyways, let's start with... Lenalee~! ^^ *slip of paper appears in my hand* Your question reads:
"Lenalee,
What are your favorite DGM Yaoi pairings?
~myangelicladyofdarkness"
Lenalee and Road: *grin*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: OH DEAR GOD...
Tyki: ... So what are they?
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: *give Tyki a "WTF?" stare*
Lenalee: Well, I'm particularly fond of Yullen and Laven, but I also like LaviYuu a lot! ^^
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *gape in horror*
Tyki: ... OH MY GOD... THIS IS HORRIBLE!
Allen: *sighs in relief* FINALLY, Tyki's seeing reason-
Tyki: I'M NOT IN ANY OF THOSE PAIRINGS!
Allen: *sweat drops* I spoke too soon...
Lenalee: *shrugs* Whatever.
Road: I like Yullen and Laven, but LaviYuu is just horrible, Lena!
Ben-kun: *rolls eyes at Road* You're only saying that because Beansprout isn't in it.
Road: *chuckles* Guilty as charged~
NoName-chan: Well, I personally like all 3 of those pairings, but I like Laven and LaviYuu better than Yullen just because Yullen is a bit overused. Plus I can't imagine it ever truly working out for real.
Lenalee: *nods her head* True. Plus-
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: CAN WE JUST MOVE ON ALREADY?!
NoName-chan: *hits all 3 of them over the head with the shovel* NO YELLING! But, yes, we can~! ^^ *slip of paper appears in my hand* This one's for Road~! It reads:
"Road,
How do I wash blood out of fabric? I got Tyki's blood all over my clothes when I beat him half to death with that shovel during Episode-Chapter-Thingy 1.
~myangelicladyofdarkness"
Road: *grins* To answer your question, myangelicladyofdarkness, the best way to wash Tyki's blood out of clothes is with a new detergent I invented called "Tyki Blood Remover." You can order over the phone or online~!
NoName-chan: I might have to look that up, too, Road! Anyways, *slip of paper appears in my hand* This one's for Yuu-chan! It reads:
"Yuu-chan!
Would you cut your hair if you were dying and the only way to save yourself was to cut your hair?
~myangelicladyofdarkness"
Kanda: *tick mark* DON'T CALL ME BY THAT NAM-
NoName-chan: *hits him over the head with the shovel* JUST ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION!
Kanda: CHE. Yes, fine, I would cut my hair to save my life.
NoName-chan: Super! MOVING ON! *slip of paper appears in my hand* This one's for Beansprout~! It reads:
"Dear Allen,
How did you survive Cross?! He's evil! And Tyki, too!
~Lucy Moon-Walker"
Allen: Well, to answer your question, I barely survived either of those. I consider myself lucky to have made it alive this long!
NoName-chan: Heartwarming. NEXT~! *slip of paper appears in my hand* This one's for Lavi~! It reads:
"Lavi,
Why do all of your commands include "growing" or "extending"?
~Lucy Moon-Walker"
Lavi: *grins* Well, -
NoName-chan: *hits Lavi over the head with the shovel* NO PERVERTEDNESS!
Lavi: GEEZ, fine! Those are simply the commands that work with my Anti-Akuma weapon.
NoName-chan: Wonderful! *Slip of paper appears in my hand* Now, finally, this ones for Tyki~! It reads-
Usagi-Twins: *jump up from the audience again* WAIT! Can we say this one too?
NoName-chan: *shrugs* I don't see why not.
Usagi-Twins: *smile* Awesome! *walk on stage*
Candy: This question is from me. Tyki, *looks at him* Why do you always come across as a rapist, pedo, jerk, etc.?
Tyki: *shrugs* um... I dunno?
Random Audience Member: It's because he is one!
NoName-chan: *shouts back at the audience member* I agree!
Ben-kun: NONAME ELIZABETH KANDA! I TOLD YOU NOT TO TALK TO STRANGERS!
NoName-chan: *hits Ben-kun over the head with the shovel* And I said SHUT UP!
Allen: Wait... NoName Elizabeth KANDA?! Is that her full name? O.O
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Road: Duh.
Lavi: Wait... Does that mean...
Allen, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: *sudden realization. Look at my hands*
NoName-chan: *wearing a diamond ring on my left ring finger*
Allen, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: OH MY GOD!
NoName-chan: What?
Tyki: YOU'RE MARRIED?!
NoName-chan: Yup.
Lavi: *stares at Kanda* YOU PEDO!
Kanda: *stares at Lavi quizzically* What the hell are you talking about?
Lavi: YOU'RE MARRIED TO NONAME-CHAN!
Allen: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU, KANDA!
Tyki: I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL!
Lenalee: *freezes at Tyki's exclamation and gets a nosebleed*
Lavi: HOW COULD YOU MARRY A 13-YEAR-OLD?! ESPECIALLY HER!
NoName-chan and Kanda: We're not married, you dipshits.
Lavi: AND THEN- wait, what? You're not?
Kanda: *rolls eyes* Of course not! She's annoying!
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* I AM NOT! And, no. I'm not married to Kanda.
Allen: BUT... BUT... THE RING! YOUR LAST NAME! HOW ARE YOU NOT-?!
NoName-chan: Kanda's my cousin, dumbass.
Allen, Lavi, Tyki: WHAT?!
NoName-chan: *rolls eyes* Duh. Before he became a test tube baby, Kanda was originally another person. In his past life, he had a father, who had a brother, who had a daughter. And here I am.
Lavi: But, wait, if you're not married to Kanda, then who are you married to?
NoName-chan: Him~! *points to a seat in the audience*
Allen, Lavi, Tyki: *look where I'm pointing to find a taco placed on a seat*
Tyki: ...A taco? You're married to a taco?
NoName-chan: *beams* Not just any taco!
Taco: Hi, NoName-chan~! ^^
Lavi: *pales*
Allen: Wait, what?
Lavi: She's married to the talking taco from earlier...
NoName-chan: *smirks* You're damn right I am! Oh, and even though today's Question Round is over, I want to include one more Question today that isn't for any of you!
Lenalee: Really? Who's it for? O.o
NoName-chan: *grins and takes out my phone. Dials a number*
*Ringing*
"Hello?"
NoName-chan: Hey, Komui~! It's NoName-chan! I'm on DGS right now, and someone sent in a Question for you!
"Really? Okay, what is it?"
NoName-chan: *pulls out a slip of paper* It reads:
"Komui,
Can I have a Komurin...? Or if not, can I have your coffee cup...? :D
~Slaythevampire87"
"Well, sure! You can have a Komurin! Just drop by my office any time to get it! But not my coffee cup. It was given to me by my darling LENALEE~!"
NoName-chan: Wonderful! *hangs up phone* Well, you heard him, Slaythevampire87!
*MEANWHILE IN KOMUI'S OFFICE*
Komui: *staring at the recently hung of phone* Well then...
Slaythevampire87: *bursts into the room* WHERE'S MY KOMURIN?!
Komui: *SCREAM. Jumps two feet in the air in surprise*
*BACK WITH THE CAST*
NoName-chan: Alright, onto the Random Round~! *the random box full of Popsicle sticks appears on my lap* Alright, let's start with... Allen! *picks a random Popsicle stick and reads it. Grins* Looks like you got a Combo Dare!
Allen: *looks at me confusedly* What's a "Combo Dare"?
NoName-chan: It means that this is for two people rather than one!
Allen: *pales* Uh oh...
Road: *grins* So who's the other person?
NoName-chan: This dare is for both Allen and Kanda~!
Allen and Kanda: WHAT?!
NoName-chan: *ignores them* It reads:
"Allen and Kanda,
I dare you both to sing a duet, like "The Onion Song."
~Magicsinger"
Allen and Kanda: *gape in shock and horror*
NoName-chan: Well, you heard the lady! *table becomes a risen platform* NOW GET UP THERE OR FACE MY WRATH!
Allen and Kanda: *YELP. Climb onto the stage*
NoName-chan: *hands them both microphones* Here ya go~! ^^ Now, DJ, HIT IT~!
*music starts*
Allen and Kanda: *sigh and start singing* "The world is just a great big onion
Allen: And pain and fear are the spices that make you cry
Allen and Kanda: Oh, and the only way to get rid of this great big onion
Kanda: Is to plant love seeds until it dies, uh huh
Allen: Hey world! We got a great big job to do
Yeah, we need you
And everybody who loves truth
Don't you know we've got to clean up this place
and reach far and high oh yeah
Kanda: Yes we do
We gotta be headstrong about rightin' the wrong
And make a mountain of happy souls, oh
Allen: Oh
Allen and Kanda: The world is just a great big onion
Allen: And I don't care, it's the face people like to wear
Kanda: Yes it is now
Allen and Kanda: And the only way to get rid of this great big onion
Kanda: Every one single soul's got to do their share
Allen: Tell about it, baby!
So come on, let's knock on every door
Tell them love is the answer
Whether they're rich or poor, oh yeah
For we don't care what you do
How you look, or your status claim, baby
Kanda: No no, because brothers and sisters
From now on, is gonna be everyone's name, oh oh
Allen and Kanda: The world is just a great big onion
Allen: And pain and fear are the spices that make you cry
Kanda: Yes it is
Allen and Kanda: And the only way to get rid of this great big onion
Kanda: Is to plant love seeds
Allen: Now everybody, got to plant love seeds
Kanda: Come on and plant love seeds
Allen: Until it dies
Allen and Kanda: The world is just a great big onion"
*song ends*
NoName-chan: *wipes away tears and claps* So beautiful~!
Allen and Kanda: *glare at me*
NoName-chan: *suddenly stops crying* Anyways, we've gotta move on, so BITCHES, GET OFF DA STAGE!
Allen and Kanda: *hop down*
*stage goes back to being a table*
NoName-chan: Now, let's move on: Yuu-chan~!
Kanda: *gapes* WHAT?! I JUST DID-
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* AND THAT WAS ALLEN'S RANDOMNESS, AND THIS IS YOURS, NOW SHUT UP! Anyways, *picks out a Popsicle stick* Your randomness is... Another Dare~! It reads:
"Kanda,
I dare you to dress up as your true gender- a girl- for a year.
~Lucy Moon-Walker"
Kanda: WHAT THE FU-?!
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* NO COMPLAINING! Now, sorry 'bout 'cha, but you're going to be dressed as a girl for the next year or until somebody cancels it out-
Road: *whispering* NOBODY CANCEL IT OUT! NOBODY CANCEL IT OUT!
NoName-chan: -so, Lucy Moon-Walker, mind coming up here and showing us what you want him to wear today? :D
Lucy Moon-Walker: *grins and walks onto the stage* Why, of course! *holds up a randomly appearing sundress* How about this?
NoName-chan: BEAUTIFUL~! Well, Yuu-chan?
Kanda: *snatches the dress from her and stomps off, muttering under his breath*
NoName-chan: Okay~! ^^ Who should go next~?
Ben-kun: How about our sweet Lena-lady? :3
NoName-chan: Sure~! ^^ Lenalee, *picks out a Popsicle stick* your randomness is... Another Dare~! It reads:
"Lenalee,
I dare you to dye your hair pink and dress as a hooker for a month. Komui can't say anything.
~Lucy Moon-Walker."
Lenalee: *eyes widen at Lucy*
Ben-kun and Tyki: ... YES!
NoName-chan: *hits them both over the head with the shovel* NO PERVERTEDNESS! Anyways, GEEZ PEOPLE! What is it with you and the super long dead lines? XD
Lucy Moon-Walker: It makes things interesting! XD
NoName-chan: Oh, that makes sense! Alright, well, you heard the woman, Lenalee! You've got a dare to do!
Lenalee: *sighs and leaves the room*
NoName-chan: Okay, moving on~! Let's do... Lavi~! *picks up a Popsicle stick* Alright, Lavi, your Randomness is... *eyes widen considerably*
Lavi: *gulps* W-what?
NoName-chan:
"Lavi,
Let Tyki rape you.
~Lucy Moon-Walker."
Lavi: *GAPE*
NoName-chan: Wow... O.O *grins at Lucy* I didn't know you wanted Fanservice so badly!
Lucy Moon-Walker: *tick mark* I DON'T! HE JUST DESERVES IT!
NoName-chan: *squeaks in fear* Y-yes, ma'am! 0.0;;; *grins* Well, Lavi, Tyki, off to the Rape Room you go~!
Tyki: *grins* AWESOME~! *drags Lavi out of the room*
Lavi: *thrashes and screams for help*
Ben-kun: *looks at me* Rape Room? You have one of those? O.O
NoName-chan: You'd be surprised how handy it can be... Anyways, while Tyki gives it to Lavi, next Randomness~! Road, since you and Tyki are the only ones left to do this and Tyki's a bit preoccupied, let's go to you~! *picks a Popsicle stick* Your Randomness is... A Double Question~!
Road: A Double Question? What's that?
NoName-chan: Oh, all that means is that you have two questions to answer instead of one! ^^ Here's your first question:
"Road,
WHY ARE YOU SO EVIL?! You say you love Allen, but why I'd you poke his eye out with one of your pointy candles?!
~Lucy Moon-Walker"
Allen: 0.0 ...Does Lucy hate Road or something?...
NoName-chan: Kind of, but she mostly just loves you~! ^^
Allen: *smiles at Lucy* Why thank you~~~
Lucy Moon-Walker: *smiles and hugs Allen* Anything for you, cutey~!
NoName-chan: Yeah, yeah, 'Kay, Road?
Road: *grins* Well to answer your Questions, Lucy, I'm not evil. I'm sadistic. There's a difference~ And I stabbed Allen's eye out before I loved him~
Allen: *shudders at the memory*
Random Audience Member: *cough*Ormaybeshe'sjustbipolar*cough*
Lucy Moon-Walker: *tick mark. Glares at Road* I WOULDN'T BUY THAT IN A MILLION YEARS! YA WANNA GO, YOU BITCH?!
Road: BRING IT-
NoName-chan: We're on a time limit right now, so save it for later, Ladies~! Now, for Road's other question~! It reads:
"Dear Road,
Where do you get your clothes? I absolutely love them! :D
~Slaythevampire87"
Road: *grins* Why thank you~! The Earl made them for me, but I'm sure he'd make you some, too, if you ask.
*MEANWHILE AT THE BLACK ARK*
Millennium Earl: *calmly sitting with Lulubell on his lap in cat form*
*Doorbell rings*
Earl: Hm? Who's that?
Lulubell: *changes into human form and walks towards the door* I got it. *opens door* Hello, how can I help yo-
Slaythevampire87: *pushes Lulubell out of the way* MOVE! *launches herself at the Earl* MAKE ME SOME CLOTHES!
Earl: 0.0 ... *shrugs* Sure.
Slaythevampire87: *leaps in joy*
*BACK AT THE SHOW*
NoName-chan: Okay, next, let's-
Kanda: *slams the door open and storms in, dressed in a yellow sundress with cherry blossoms on it and white ballet flats*
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Allen, Road: *gape*
NoName-chan: Jesus Christ, Yuu-chan, easy on the door...
Road: *squeals* HE'S SO PRETTY~!
Ben-kun: *gaping at Kanda* Wow... 0.0
Allen: *starts snickering*
Kanda: *gives Allen a death glare*
Allen: *shuts up*
Lucy Moon-Walker: *gives Kanda a death glare* DON'T GLARE AT ALLEN.
Kanda: *pales and stops glaring*
NoName-chan: Okay, okay, now sit down, Yuu-chan, so I can tell you what you missed.
Kanda: Che. *sits down in his rightful place on the blue couch*
NoName-chan: Okay, so here's what you missed in a nutshell: Road answered hate mail, Tyki's raping Lavi-
Kanda: *eyes widen* WHAT?!
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* SHUT UP, I WASN'T FINISHED! Anyways, and Lenalee was dared to-
Lenalee: *slams door open and walks in with Hooker clothes and pink hair*
Allen and Kanda: *gape*
NoName-chan: OH MY FUCKING GOD, AGAIN WITH THE DOOR!
Ben-kun: *nosebleed*
Road: ... *laughs*
Lucy Moon-Walker: *nods approvingly*
Lenalee: *sighs and sits down on the blue couch* So what'd I miss?
NoName-chan: *EXASPERATED SIGH* Road answered hate mail, Kanda got back with his dress, and Tyki's-
Tyki: *slams door open with a crying Lavi slung over his shoulder*
NoName-chan: IF YOU ASSHOLES BREAK MY GODDAMN DOOR, I'M GONNA BE PISSED!
Tyki: THE DEED IS DONE~! *grins*
Lavi: *sobs*
Lenalee: *raises an eyebrow* What deed?
Lucy Moon-Walker: *grins*
NoName-chan: Tyki raped Lavi.
Lenalee: *eyes widen. NOSEBLEED*
NoName-chan: Alrighty then. Tyki, just put Lavi anywhere.
Tyki: 'Kay. *props Lavi up against the table and sits down*
NoName-chan: Okay, now it's time for out final Randomness of the day: Tyki~! *picks out a Popsicle stick* Alright, you've got... *laughs* OH, THIS IS AWESOME! XD
Allen: What is it?
NoName-chan:
"Tyki,
Host one of your fashion shows ;D
~Pineapplebombgirl"
Tyki: *squeals in joy* OMGOMGOMGOMG~!
Pineapplebombgirl: *walks onto the stage, smiling and holding a bunch of clothes* I even designed a collection for you, Tyki! ^^
Tyki: *squeals again and glomps Pineapplebombgirl* THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU~! *takes the clothes and sprints out of the room*
Allen, Kanda, Lenalee: ...
Ben-kun: ... *starts laughing with me*
Road: *grins and takes out her Blackmail Camera*
Lavi: *still too traumatized to say anything*
NoName-chan: *grins and snaps fingers*
Stage: *suddenly transforms into a fashion show setup with Ben, our contestants, Lucy, and Pineapplebombgirl sitting in front of the risen runway and the audience sitting in their seats behind them.*
*music starts playing*
NoName-chan: *sitting in the announcers spot with a microphone. Grins* Welcome one and all to today's Fashion Show~! Today, we will be presenting you with a brand new style designed by Pineapplebombgirl and worn by our top model, Tyki Mikk~!
*Applause*
NoName-chan: Now, without further ado, I present you with our new collection, "The Fabulous Kitty Boy"~! First up, we have... The Summer Style~!
Tyki: *sashays onto the stage wearing a fashionable pair of jean booty shorts, a white tank top with Hello Kitty on it, hot pink stiletto heels, a bandana that wraps up his hair, and a pair old lady sunglasses with a huge smile. Strikes a couple poses at the front of the stage before doing a fashionista twirl and walking back and off the runway backstage*
Ben-kun, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee: *gape*
Road: *laughing ass off*
Allen: OH GOD MY VIRGIN EYES!
Lucy Moon-Walker: It's okay, Allen! I'll protect you! *glomps him*
Pineapplebombgirl: So photogenic~!
NoName-chan: *grins* Next, we have... The Winter Style~!
Tyki: *repeats the modeling process wearing a Banana Republic teal pea coat with a black scarf, white faded jeans, a pair of fabulous rainbow polka dot rain boots, and a black beanie hat with Hello Kitty print*
Ben-kun, Kanda, Lavi: *still gaping*
Lenalee: Wow, I positively LOVE those boots~!
Pineapplebombgirl: *smiles* Why, thank you~!
Road: *ROFLing*
Allen: *sobbing into Lucy's shoulder*
Lucy Moon-Walker: *holding him protectively*
NoName-chan: Up next, we have... The Prom Style~!
Tyki: *repeats the process again wearing a VERY frilly and sparkly hot pink dress that is accented with a purple sash, goes down to his feet, and has a sweetheart neckline, black high heels, a crystal tiara, a pearl necklace and earrings, and a purple "Prom Queen" award sash while carrying a beautiful bouquet of red roses*
NoName-chan: *wipes tears* So beautiful~!
Pineapplebombgirl: *wipes tears as well* He's such a beautiful princess!
Ben-kun, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee: *giving us a "WTF?" stare*
Road: *still ROFLing*
Allen: *has finally stopped crying* Um... Lucy, you can let go now...
Lucy Moon-Walker: *still clinging to Allen* NEVER!
NoName-chan: Next, we have... The Schoolgirl Style~!
Tyki: *once again repeats the process wearing a black mini skirt with a tucked in white shirt, a teal bowtie, a black suit jacket to go over, knee-high socks, and hot pink ballet flats with Hello Kitty on them*
Ben-kun and Kanda: *STILL gaping*
Lavi: I'm starting to think that Hello Kitty is a major theme here...
Pineapplebombgirl: It is ^^
Lenalee: I like his skirt~! ^^
Road: *You can probably already guess what she's doing*
Allen: *has given up trying to persuade Lucy to let go and is hugging her back*
Lucy Moon-Walker: *in her happy place*
NoName-chan: Next up, we have... The Bikini Style~!
Tyki: *repeats the process wearing a teal colored bikini with white vertical stripes, a string-bikini top with a ruffled front, and booty shorts-styled bottoms, all made by Abercrombie, and flip flops with the same design and creator*
Allen: *starts crying into Lucy's shoulder again*
Lucy Moon-Walker: *continues holding him*
Lavi: Hey, there wasn't any Hello Kitty in this one!
Pineapplebombgirl: There wasn't any in The Prom Style either ^^;;;
Ben-kun and Kanda: *GapeGapeGapeGapeGapeGapeGape*
Road: *Lololololololol*
NoName-chan: Next in our collection, we have... The Pajama Style~! :D
Tyki: *repeats the modeling process again wearing teal Footsie pajamas with hello kitty all over them and padding on the bottom of the feet. Carrying a stuffed animal of Hello Kitty eating a pretzel*
Ben-kun and Kanda: *still have not moved*
Lavi: ...Why was Hello Kitty eating a pretzel? O.o
Pineapplebombgirl: Because PRETZELS~! :D
Lenalee: D'aaawwwww so cute~! ^^
Road: *Take a wild guess what's going on with her -.-*
Allen and Lucy Moon-Walker: *still hugging*
NoName-chan: And, now, for our Finale~! For the final piece of The Fabulous Kitty Boy Collection, we have... THE UNDERWEAR STYLE~!
Tyki: *repeats the modeling process one last time wearing a lacy hot pink bra with small black bows, lacy black panties with hello kitty and gold fringe on them, and gold stilettos*
Ben-kun, Lavi, Kanda: *eyes are so wide, people are surprised they haven't popped yet*
Lenalee: *NOSEBLEED*
Road: ... *snorts and bursts out in laughter even more intense than the previous outbursts*
Lucy Moon-Walker: 0_0 *holds Allen even more protectively than before*
Allen: *staring blankly off into space* No words can truly explain the horrors I just witnessed...
Pineapplebombgirl: Tee hee! XD
NoName-chan: And that concludes our Fashion Show, everybody~! *snaps fingers*
Stage: *returns to its normal setup*
Tyki: *suddenly back in his suit on his respective couch*
Pineapplebombgirl: XD THAT WAS AWESOME!
NoName-chan and Road: WE KNOW! XD
Tyki: Hey, Piña, can I keep the outfits...? :D
Pineapplebombgirl: Of course! ^^
Tyki: YAYZ~!
NoName-chan: Okay, now that that's over, let's get to Yuu-chan's other dare~! ^^
Kanda: WHAT?!
NoName-chan: Oh, I didn't tell you? Your randomness included two dares!
Kanda: OH HELL NO! *attempts to impale me with the safety scissors and fails* ...SHIT.
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* BITCH, SIT DOWN!
Kanda: ASDFGHJKL?/!#% *sits down*
NoName-chan: Anyways, Yuu-chan, your dare reads:
"Kanda,
I dare you to skip around Allen while throwing flower petals and singing the My Little Pony theme song.
~Slaythevampire87"
Kanda: *gapes*
Road: *laughs ass off*
NoName-chan: *grins* Well, Yuu-chan, you heard the woman! *hands Kanda a basket of flower petals* Now, GO~!
Kanda: *tick mark* CHE. *starts skipping around Allen and throwing handfuls of flower petals*
"My Little Pony, My Little Pony
Aaaaaaaaaaaah
My Little Pony
I used to wonder what friendship could be
Until you all shared its magic with me!
Big adventure!
Tons of fun!
A beautiful heart
Faithful and strong
Sharing kindness
It's an easy feat
And magic makes it all complete!
My Little Pony
Did you know, you are my very best friends!"
Allen and Lavi: ... *laugh asses off*
Kanda: *glares at them and sits down*
NoName-chan: *trying to hide my chuckles and failing* Well, that concludes the Random Round~! Next, it's time for... Authoress's Choice~! *grins*
Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Tyki, Lenalee: *pale* OH GOD...
Road: *grins* BRING IT!
NoName-chan: *grins* Oh, I intend to~!
Ben-kun: *eyes widen at my expression* Oh god... I know THAT look... 0.0
Allen: *trembles* W-what look...?
Ben-kun: The look that tells us she has something big already planned for everyone.
NoName-chan: *grins* And indeed I do~! But, first, *looks at Lucy* I'm gonna have to tie you up. *tackles Lucy and ties her up*
Lucy Moon-Walker: *screams furiously* WHAT THE HELL?!
NoName-chan: Sorry, Lucy, but you're probably going to kill me and Piña for this, and that's bad for ratings. Anyways, today's Authoress's Choice is for all of or contestants~! Our lovely Pineapplebombgirl actually came up with this!
Pineapplebombgirl: *grins* Wait, you mean it's...?
NoName-chan: *grins* Yup~! Today, my choice is... AN EATING CONTEST~!
Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: *stare at me questioningly*
Allen: ... YES~!
NoName-chan: Oh, don't get your hopes up just yet. *grins* The way this is going to work is that everybody is going to be blindfolded. Each round, a different dish of my choice will be set in front of you. You guys will have to eat all of whatever it is AND keep it down. After that, you'll have to guess what it was! If anybody fails to eat the whole dish, throws up, or can't guess what it is, they're out and get hit with the shovel! Last person still in wins!
Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: *gape*
Allen and Road: *grin* Bring it~!
NoName-chan: *grins* Gladly~ Ben-kun, Piña, mind getting the stuff ready?
Ben-kun and Pineapplebombgirl: *salute* WE'RE ON IT!
*5 minutes later*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: *sitting in chairs at a long Pie-Eating-Contest-style white table, each blindfolded with a fork in front of them*
Ben-kun and Pineapplebombgirl: *set covered plates in front of each of them*
NoName-chan: *grins* Round 1! Begin in 3... 2... 1! GO!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: *manage to pull the covering off their food and start eating*
NoName-chan: *grins and gestures to a large projector that's projecting the words "ROUND 1: Raw Horseradish" on the wall behind the contestants*
Allen: *eats the whole dish in record time with little to no reaction*
Kanda: *eats the whole dish slowly, making a disgusted face the whole time*
Lenalee: *eats the whole dish shakily, gagging a few times, but not throwing up*
Road: *eats the dish relatively quickly with a slightly grossed out face*
Tyki: *barely manages to choke the dish down, coughing harshly several times*
Lavi: *about to eat the dish, but seemingly remembers something and throws up before even touching it for He-Was-Raped-By-Tyki-Twenty-Minutes-Ago -related reasons*
NoName-chan: LAVI'S OUT! *Hits Lavi over the head with the shovel*
Lavi: *GROAN*
NoName-chan: Okay, guys, Ben-kun's going to walk around to each of you, and when he does, quietly tell him what you think the dish was so people around you don't steal your answer! ^^
Ben-kun: *walks to Allen*
Allen: *easily replies* Horseradish.
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^ *walks to Kanda*
Kanda: *still making a face* Horseradish.
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^ *walks to Lenalee*
Lenalee: *looking a bit green* H-Horseradish, I think...
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^ *walks to Road*
Road: *nonchalant* Horseradish.
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^ *walks to Tyki*
Tyki: *still coughing madly* H-Horseradish...
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^
NoName-chan: And the answer was... Horseradish! Now, onto Round 2!
Ben-kun and Pineapplebombgirl: *set new dishes in front of the contestants*
NoName-chan: 3... 2... 1! BEGIN!
Allen, Kanda, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: *start eating*
NoName-chan: *gestures to the projection again, this time it reading "ROUND 2: Black Licorice"*
Allen and Road: *finish quickly with no reaction*
Kanda: *finishes the same way he did the Horseradish*
Tyki: *turns a bit green, but manages to finish*
Lenalee: *slowly eats the dish, gagging several times, but puts it down halfway through* I-I can't do it...
NoName-chan: LENALEE'S OUT! Sorry 'bout this, Lena! *hits her over the head with the shovel* Now, guys, same thing as last time! Ben-kun?
Ben-kun: Of course! ^^ *walks to Allen*
Allen: *another easy reply* Black Licorice.
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^ *walks to Kanda*
Kanda: *still making that face* Black Licorice...
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^ *walks to Road*
Road: Black Licorice *makes a face* Bleh! What a terrible candy!
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^ *walks to Tyki*
Tyki: *beginning to turn green again* B-Black Licorice...
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^
NoName-chan: And the answer was... Black Licorice~! Now, Round 3~! ^^
Ben-kun and Pineapplebombgirl: *set new dishes in front of the contestants*
NoName-chan: 3... 2... 1! GO, MOTHERFUCKERS, GO!
Allen, Kanda, Road, Tyki: *start eating*
NoName-chan: *gestures to the wall again, the projection now saying "ROUND 3: Beansprouts!"
Allen: *eats quickly, looking incredibly pissed off*
Kanda: *eats at a normal pace, chuckling to himself the whole time*
Road: *Eats quickly with a slight grin*
Tyki: *eats with a confused look on his face*
NoName-chan: Alright, guys, same as before! Ben-kun?
Ben-kun: I'm on it! ^^ *walks to Allen*
Allen: *tick mark* Beansprouts. You guys are assholes.
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^ *walks to Kanda*
Kanda: *smirks* Moyashis.
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^ *walks to Road*
Road: *laughs* Beansprouts!
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^ *walks to Tyki*
Tyki: *looks uneasy* U-um... Shredded Lettuce maybe?
Ben-kun: INCORRECT!
NoName-chan: TYKI'S OUT! *hits Tyki over the head with the shovel*
Tyki: OW!
NoName-chan: The correct answer was Beansprouts! Onto Round 4!
Ben-kun and Pineapplebombgirl: *set new dishes in front of the contestants*
NoName-chan: 3... 2- Oh, fuck this shit, just GO!
Allen, Kanda, Road: *start eating*
NoName-chan: *points at wall, which now says "ROUND 4: Fresh Goose Liver"
Allen: *quickly eats with only a slight face*
Road: *quickly eats in a similar manner to Allen*
Kanda: *takes one bite and immediately spits it out* OKAY, NO! I'M NOT EATING THIS!
NoName-chan: YUU-CHAN'S OUT! *his Kanda over the head with the shovel*
Kanda: ASDFGHJKL/?!$#%
NoName-chan: Well, you guys know what to do! Ben-kun?
Ben-kun: On it! ^^ *walks to Allen*
Allen: Fresh Goose Liver... *makes a disgusted face*
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^ *walks to Road*
Road: Definitely Fresh Goose Liver...
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^
NoName-chan: The correct answer was... Fresh Goose Liver~! Alright, guys, FINAL ROUND~!
Ben-kun and Pineapplebombgirl: *set dishes in front of the final 2*
NoName-chan: No countdown! BEGIN!
Allen and Road: *start eating*
NoName-chan: *points at the projection, which says "FINAL ROUND: Year-old-pepperoni and moldy goat cheese pizza with dry cat food sprinkles"
Allen and Road: *both finish quickly with grossed out expressions*
NoName-chan: Alrighty~! Ben-kun?
Ben-kun: Yup! ^^ *walks to Allen*
Allen: Year-old-pepperoni and moldy goat cheese pizza with dry cat food sprinkles...
Ben-kun: Correct! ^^ *walks to Road*
Road: Year-old-pepperoni and moldy cow cheese pizza with dry cat food sprinkles...
Ben-kun: Sorry, Road! Wrong type of cheese! INCORRECT!
NoName-chan: ROAD'S OUT! The correct answer was: Year-old-pepperoni and moldy goat cheese pizza with dry cat food sprinkles!
Road: *throws hands up in anger* AW, I KNEW IT WAS GOAT CHEESE!
NoName-chan: Either way, Allen wins! ^^
Allen: Um, great but... Aren't you going to hit Road with the shovel?
NoName-chan: ... Nah.
Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Tyki: WHAT?! BUT YOU HIT US! WHY NOT ROAD OR LENALEE?!
NoName-chan: HEY, I DID HIT LENALEE!
Kanda: BARELY! SHE DIDN'T EVEN FLINCH! MEANWHILE, WE ALL HAVE BRUISES AND PROBABLY CRACKED SKULLS!
NoName-chan: OH, SHUT UP! I DO WHAT I WANT!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *steaming with rage at me*
NoName-chan and Road: *laugh in their faces*
Lavi: *LIGHTBULB. Grins and uses my moment of uncontrollable laughter to steal my shovel*
NoName-chan: *stops laughing and eyes shoot wide* M-MY SHOVEL!
Lavi: *grins triumphantly* What are you gonna do now that you can't beat us to death?
NoName-chan: *pales*
Allen: DESTROY IT!
Kanda: KILL HER!
Tyki: BEAT HER WITH HER OWN SHOVEL!
Lavi: Hm... All good suggestions...
NoName-chan: *whimpers* G-GIVE IT BACK!
Lavi: Or what?
NoName-chan: *deep breath* I didn't want it to come to this, but I guess I have no choice... *puts on a flawless façade of innocence along with a kicked puppy look and some tears*
Lavi: ...What is she doing?
Ben-kun: *pales* OH, YOU'RE IN FOR IT NOW.
Lavi: Still, what is she doing?
Ben-kun: Even though NoName-chan is cruel, sadistic, torturous, and beyond abusive, she has a secret weapon... She has the ability to make her evil aura disappear and replace it with one of pure innocence.
Lavi: ...And?
Ben-kun: LOOK AT HER! SHE LOOKS LIKE A FRIGHTENED 4-YEAR-OLD!
Lavi: *looks at me*
NoName-chan: *looking innocent, hurt, betrayed, and overall...*
Lavi: AAAAWWWW! SHE'S TOO ADORABLE, I CAN'T STAY MAD AT HER! I'M SO SORRY, NONAME-CHAN! I WON'T DO ANYTHING MEAN TO YOU EVER AGAIN! I PROMISE!
NoName-chan: *suddenly back to normal. Smirks* That's what I thought. NOW GIVE ME BACK MY SHOVEL!
Allen, Kanda, Tyki: GODDAMN IT, LAVI!
Lavi: *shakes out of his trance* SHIT! Can you at least do SOMETHING to earn it back?
NoName-chan: *considers this and grins* Sure. As a treat for both you guys and the fabulous viewers~ Ben-kun, I'm gonna need your help.
Ben-kun: ...What do I have to do?
NoName-chan: *grins* Oh, you'll figure it out quickly. Now, *gestures to the table, with is now a risen platform* Let's go~ *drags Ben up onto the platform with me*
Kanda: I have a bad feeling about this...
Road and Lenalee: *grin and hold up video cameras* This is gonna be awesome...
NoName-chan: *hands Ben a magically-appearing microphone and holds up one of my own* Alright, TURN ON THE MUSIC!
Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Tyki: *pale when they realize what song is playing*
Road and Lenalee: *start laughing*
Ben-kun: *smiles*
NoName-chan: *grins and starts singing* "We wonder, are you ready to join us now?
Hands in the air, we will show you how
Come and try, Caramell will be your guide~
Ben-kun: *grins as well and starts singing* So come on move your hips
Singing woa-oa-oa!
Look at youtube clips do it oh-la-la!
You and me, can sing this melody!
NoName-chan and Ben-kun: Owa-o-wa-wao!
*start doing the CaramellDansen*
Dance to the beat, wave your hands together
Come feel the heat, forever and forever
Listen and learn, it is time for prancing
Now we are here, with Caramell Dancing~!
NoName-chan: Oo-oo-owa-owa!
Oo-oo-owa-owa-a-a!
Ben-kun: Oo-oo-owa-owa!
Oo-oo-owa-owa-a-a!
NoName-chan: From Sweden to UK, we will bring our song
Australia, USA, and people at Hong Kong
They have heard, this means all around the world~
NoName-chan and Ben-kun: Owa-owa-ao!
Ben-kun: So come on move your hips,
Singing Woa-oa-oa!
Look at youtube clips
Do it la-la-la!
You and me, can sing this melody!
NoName-chan and Ben-kun: So come and dance to the beat, wave your hands together
Come feel the heat, forever and forever
Listen and learn, it is time for prancing,
Now we are here, with Caramell Dancing~!
Dance to the beat, wave your hands together
Come feel the heat, forever and forever
Listen and learn, it is time for prancing
Now we are here, with Caramell Dancing~!
NoName-chan: Oo-oo-owa-owa!
Oo-oo-owa-owa-a-a!
Ben-kun: Oo-oo-owa-owa!
Oo-oo-owa-owa-a-a!
NoName-chan and Ben-kun: So come and dance to the beat, wave your hands together
Come feel the heat, forever and forever
Listen and learn, it is time for prancing
Now we are here, with Caramell Dancing~!
Dance to the beat, wave your hands together
Come feel the heat, forever and forever
Listen and learn, it is time for prancing
Now we are here, with Caramell Dancing~!"
*song ends*
Road and Lenalee: *roll on the floor laughing*
Allen, Kanda, Tyki: *gape*
Lavi: *facepalms*
NoName-chan and Ben-kun: *grin and take a bow*
NoName-chan: *magically appears next to Lavi* NOW GIVE ME BACK MY SHOVEL! *kicks him in the face and snatches my shovel*
Lavi: OOOOWWWW! *holds his face in pain*
NoName-chan: *smirks like a badass* NOBODY messes with NoName-chan~
Kanda: HOLD ON, if you could just do that, then why didn't you do it before rather than go through all this trouble?
NoName-chan: ...
Allen: *sudden realization* OH MY GOD...
Tyki: What?
Allen: SHE PLANNED THIS WHOLE THING!
Lavi, Kanda, Tyki: *gape* WHAT?!
Allen: SHE KNEW FROM THE START THAT LAVI WOULD GIVE IN TO HER INNOCENT FAÇADE AND LET HER SING CARAMELLDANSEN WITH BEN-KUN!
NoName-chan: *smirks* Oh please, it goes WAY further than that! I've been planning all of this since the beginning of the Episode-Chapter-Thingy.
Lavi: HOW?! O.o
NoName-chan: Lavi, do you honestly think that I'd be dumb enough to have my guard down so much that you could just take my shovel? HELL NO. I let you take it! I was also able to predict all of your actions from there beforehand, so all I had to do was act~
Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Tyki: *gape*
Ben-kun: *laughs* Wow! XD
Road and Lenalee: *STILL laughing*
Lavi: AND THEM, THEY'VE BEEN LAUGHING THIS WHOLE TIME! W-WERE THEY IN ON THIS?
Road and Lenalee: Duh.
Ben-kun: Wait, why wasn't I in on it? O.o
NoName-chan: BECAUSE YOU WOULD'VE EITHER FUCKED UP YOUR LINES OR MADE IT TOO OBVIOUS. It was easier to just leave you ignorant~
Ben-kun: O.O
Allen: Okay, hold on, I have one more question: WHY DID YOU EVEN DO THIS?!
NoName-chan: Because I felt like dancing, and when I feel like dancing, Ben-kun feels like dancing, so together, we both felt like dancing~
Ben-kun: *grins* True~ X3
NoName-chan: Now, time for me to do what I've been wanting to do for the past 10 minutes~ *grins*
Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Tyki: *pale*
NoName-chan: *starts beating the shit out of them with my shovel* Never. EVER. Defy. Me. GOT IT?!
Allen, Lavi, Kanda, Tyki: *cry out in pain* YES, MA'AM!
NoName-chan: Oh, there was another reason for this, too. *looks at the audience* I wanted to let you guys all know that from now on, you guys have the option to send Questions, Dares, Tortures, and other suggestions to me and Ben-kun, too! Yup, fire away! However, since we're hosting this thing, we'll have the option to deny your suggestions towards us. Basically, all that means is that we will NOT answer to something like "DIE, BEN-KUN, DIE!", 'Kay? ;D
Allen: Um... That's nice, but don't we have a viewer to untie?
NoName-chan: *pales* Oh shit... *walks over to one VERY pissed Lucy and gulps* Well, guys. It was nice knowing you... *unties Lucy*
Lucy Moon-Walker: *grins evilly and takes out her Monkey Stick and cursed sword*
NoName-chan: *YELP*
Lenalee: HOLY SHIT, COMMERCIAL BREAK!
Random Camera Guy: I'M ON IT!
*COMMERCIAL SEQUENCE BEGIN*
"ROAD'S TYKI BLOOD REMOVER~!" *myangelicladyofdarkness and NoName-chan order*
"MONKEY STICKS~!" *Lucy orders*
"MONKEY STICK WOUND HEALER~!" *NoName-chan orders*
"SHOVELS~!" *NoName-chan orders*
*COMMERCIAL SEQUENCE END*
*We return to our set once again. I am laying on the ground, broken and bloody, Ben-kun is freaking the fuck out over me, Lucy is smirking and polishing her Cursed Sword, Road is shrieking at her, and Allen, Kanda, Lavi, and Tyki are gaping over the entire situation*
Ben-kun: *WAILS* WAAAAAHHHH! MY POOR BABY SISTER! WHY?! T.T
NoName-chan: *sits up slowly* Nah, it's okay, Ben-kun... I knew I had that one coming...
Lucy Moon-Walker: *smirks* Damn straight.
Road: THE HELL?!
Lucy Moon-Walker: *glares at Road* Oh, calm down, she knew what to expect for harming Allen and tying me up!
NoName-chan: Yup... ^^;;;; Anyways, I think I'm about to die of blood loss, so can we go back to commercial break?
Camera Guy: Yup!
*COMMERCIAL SEQUENCE BEGIN*
"YUU-CHAN TRANQUILIZER~!" *Allen orders*
"KOMURIN~!" *Slaythevampire87 orders*
"MONKEY STICKS TO BEAT NONAME-CHAN WITH~!" *Allen, Kanda, Lavi, and Tyki order* *OUT OF STOCK*
"EVEN MORE SHOVELS~!" *NoName-chan orders*
*COMMERCIAL SEQUENCE END*
*we return to the set, where Lucy has apparently decided to go back to her seat in the audience, and the cast is sitting on their respective couches, staring at me as I laugh my ass off and look at my phone with several casts and bandages on my body*
NoName-chan: *wheezing from laughter*
Allen: Jesus fucking Christ, what's wrong with you? O.O
NoName-chan: THIS... *wheeze* FANFICTION... *wheeze* I'M... *wheeze* READING! *wheeze mixed with laughter* SO... *wheeze* DAMN... *wheeze* FUNNY!
Kanda: Wait... Fanfiction? OH SHIT...
Lavi: What's it abo- MMPH?!
Kanda: *slapped a hand over his mouth*
NoName-chan: What was he asking?
Kanda: NOTHING! NOTHING AT ALL!
Tyki: I think he was about to ask "what's it about?", actually.
Kanda: *glares murderously at Tyki*
NoName-chan: OOOOH~! Well, it's this one smut fic about a threesome between Allen, Lavi, and Kanda, and-
Allen: OH GOD MY VIRGIN EARS! MAKE IT STOP!
Lenalee: *already has a nosebleed* No, no, keep going!
Kanda: DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE! *pulls out the safety scissors*
Lavi: *finally free of Kanda's silencing* I was in it? HOT!
Allen and Kanda: *glare at Lavi*
NoName-chan: -it was really funny because Allen and Kanda were exchanging their usual smartass remarks the whole time, and-
Allen: *covers ears* LA LA LA! I CAN'T HEAR YOU!
NoName-chan: *hits Allen over the head with the shovel* -it turned out that the entire Order could hear it all the whole time, and Lenalee went all fangirl, and Bak broke out in hives, and Komui cried for Lenalee, and Fou laughed her ass off, and-
Lavi: WHERE WAS I IN ALL OF THIS?! T_T
Kanda: WHY IS THAT YOUR MAIN CONCERN HERE?!
NoName-chan: -and Lavi was just being his normal idiotic self!
*ELSEWHERE*
Everybody in the Order who's watch-reading except Fou: *gape in shock and horror*
Fou: *laughing her ass off*
*BACK WITH THE MAIN FOCUS*
Lavi: ...Was I at least hot?
NoName-chan: *Rape Face (also known as Tyki Grin)* Very.
Lavi: SWEET!
Allen: So... Wait... Kanda and I were arguing while we...?
NoName-chan: Yup! And it was a threesome so Lavi was in on it with you guys!
Allen: I... *runs to nearest trash can and throws up*
Kanda: *exasperated sigh* and THIS is why I tried to avoid this topic.
Road and Ben-kun: *laughing their asses off*
Lenalee: *(where else?) unconscious from nosebleed*
Road: What was it called? XD
NoName-chan: "Challenged Pleasure" by Angel Fantasy (seriously, go read it. It's hilarious! XD But don't if graphic smut bothers you)
Allen: *sighs* Can we wrap this up already?
NoName-chan: Yeah, sure! ^^ Anyways, thank you all for all of your fabulous support and suggestions for today's Episode-Chapter-Thingy~! After Episode-Chapter-Thingy 1.5, the suggestions started coming in so quickly that I couldn't even use all of them! But I tried to use at least a few from each person! ^^ I'm glad you guys like this show-fanfiction-thingy, and I hope you'll continue watch-reading it! :D Please continue sending in your suggestions for us so I can write Episode-Chapter-Thingy 3 soon! ^^ Oh, and one more thing: BEN-KUN FINALLY MADE A ACCOUNT~!
Ben-kun: Yup~! ^^
NoName-chan: He has yet to write any stories, and he doesn't even have a bio, but he still has PMing and stuff, so yeah! Mind telling them your Account Name, Ben-kun~? ^^
Ben-kun: *smiles* Not at all~! ^^ It's " .1257"
*silence*
NoName-chan: *hits Ben over the head with the shovel*
Ben-kun: OW! DX What was that for?! T.T
NoName-chan: YOU PUT YOUR FULL NAME AS YOUR ACCOUNT NAME?!
Ben-kun: I'M SORRY! DX
NoName-chan: *facepalm* And with that, I conclude today's Episode-Chapter-Thingy. So, Tyki, it's time to go complete your Toture!
myangelicladyofdarkness, Road, and Jasdevi: *grin and drag Tyki away to the Tyki Torture Room*
Tyki: *screams for help*
NoName-chan: See ya later, Tyki~! Now, Lenalee, time to complete your torture~!
Komui: LENALEE~! *glomps Lenalee and drags her away to a soundproof chamber*
Lenalee: *screams for help*
NoName-chan: Perfect~! *looks at Lavi* And YOU have a date to tonight~! You better go get ready!
Lavi: *sighs and leaves*
NoName-chan: Well, that's all! Ciao~! ^^
…
EXTRA: "Lavi and Pineapplebombgirl's Date"
Lavi: *Sighs and knocks on Pineapplebombgirl's door*
Pineapplebombgirl: *answers, looking beautiful* Oh, hey~! ^^
Lavi: *Gaping at her appearance* H-hey! Um….. Ready to go?
Pineapplebombgirl: Yup~! ^^ Let's go!
*3 hours of dinner, movies, and genuinely happy conversations later*
Pineapplebombgirl and Lavi: *Walk up to Pineapplebombgirl's front door*
Pineapplebombgirl: *Whispering* We need to be quiet! I'm sharing a house with NoName-chan at the moment, and she's probably sleeping!
Lavi: *Whispering* Okay! Well, um…. *blushes* I had a really great time tonight. I'm glad that my "Torture" was to take you out.
Pineapplebombgirl: *Smiles and blushes* I'm glad, too ^^ This was a lot of fun!
Lavi: *Stands there for a moment before slowly leaning in towards Pineapplebombgirl and closing his eye*
Pineapplebombgirl: *closes her eyes and tilts her head up slightly*
Pineapplebombgirl and Lavi: *Get closer and closer until, finally, they-*
NoName-chan: *Slams the door open into Lavi's face* PIÑA! WHERE DID YOU PUT THE PRETZELS?!
Pineapplebombgirl: *Pushes me back inside the house and slams the door on my fingers. Turns to Lavi* Where were we? ^^
Lavi: 0.0 R-right….. um…. *gives Pineapplebombgirl a quick kiss before running off*
Pineapplebombgirl: *Sighs dreamily before walking inside the house. Expression suddenly turns dark* NONAME-CHAN!
NoName-chan: *Casually sitting on the couch, sipping a Dr. Pepper* In my defense, you still haven't told me where you put the pretzels.