NoName-chan: Hola, ¿Cómo están?
Allen: NOBODY READING THIS SPEAKS SPANISH!
NoName-chan: *hits Allen over the head with my shovel* BITCH ASS NIGGA, YOU DON'T KNOW THAT! Anyways, here's Episode-Chapter-Thingy 3. Sorry it took so long to get up! ^^;;;
Road: I forgive you~! ;3
NoName-chan: I'm glad~! ^^ Anyways, I don't own DGM, and I never will. So, yeah...
…
*Torturous Intro causes worldwide cringing*
Road: *grins* Welcome one and all to Episode-Chapter-Thingy 3 of DGS~! I'm Road Kamelot, and these are-
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *GROAN*
Lenalee: *stares at us oddly* What's their problem?
Road: ... I'm actually not sure...
Lenalee: Well, they look like zombies, so we should probably find out...
Road: Yeah... OI, IDIOTS! Who wants to explain what's going on with you guys?
NoName-chan: *Groans again* I'll tell you. It all started a day after Episode-Chapter-Thingy 2 aired when...
/Flashback/
NoName-chan and Pineapplebombgirl: *In our living room, doing some sort of muscle spasm dance in order to get inspiration for writing fanfictions*
*doorbell rings*
Pineapplebombgirl: *stops dancing* Who's that?
NoName-chan: *stops dancing as well and shrugs* I dunno. I didn't invite anyone over. I'll get it, you just go back to dancing.
Pineapplebombgirl: 'Kay! ^^ *starts doing the Inspiration Dance again*
NoName-chan: *answers the door*
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *standing on the porch*
Ben-kun: Hi, NoName-chan~! ^^
NoName-chan: Oh, hey, Ben-kun- *sees the other 4* WHY ARE THEY HERE.
Ben-kun: Because I invited them! ^^
NoName-chan: No shit, Sherlock! -.- I meant, WHY DID YOU INVITE THEM TO MY HOUSE?!
Allen: *taps Ben-kun on the shoulder* Hey, Ben-kun, we- *sees me* WHY IS SHE HERE?!
NoName-chan: *hits him over the head with my shovel* I LIVE HERE, DUMBASS!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: WHAT?! *turn to Ben* WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US WE WERE GOING TO HER HOUSE?!
NoName-chan: *hits Ben over the head with my shovel* YOU DIDN'T EVEN TELL THEM THEY WERE COMING HERE?!
Ben-kun: Heh... 0.0;;;;
NoName-chan, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *glare murderously at Ben*
Ben-kun: *YELP*
*We are interrupted by the loud THUMP of Piña dancing into a wall*
Pineapplebombgirl: *gets up shakily* I'M OKAY! ^^
NoName-chan: *sweat drops at Piña. Sighs and turns back to Ben, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki* Well, you guys might as well come on in since you're already here. Feel free to look around, but IF YOU BREAK MY SHIT, I WILL BREAK YOUR NECKS, GOT IT?!
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *YELP* G-GOT IT...
NoName-chan: *steps aside* Well, then get your asses inside already! You're wasting the AC!
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *walk inside*
NoName-chan: *closes the door*
Ben-kun: *looks around* Nice place you've got here! ^^
Pineapplebombgirl: *turns around to look at him* Why thank you, we- *sees Lavi* LAVI~!
Lavi: *blushes* H-hey, Piña! ^^;;;
Pineapplebombgirl: *glomps him*
Lavi: OOF-! *gets tackled to the ground*
NoName-chan: Awww how cute~! ^^
NoName-chan's thoughts: 'I hope they're not still pissed about me ruining their moment by slamming the door into Lavi's face after their date...'
Ben-kun: D'awwwww, they have such a way of greeting each other! X3 *seemingly thinks of something and grins evilly* Which reminds me... *starts tickling me* HEY, NONAME-CHAN! X3
NoName-chan: *shrieks and starts laughing hysterically* BAHAHAHA! S-STOP! BAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
Ben-kun: NO! X3
NoName-chan: *starts rolling around on the ground and kicking* BAHAHAHA! S-SERIOUSLY, BEN-KUN! S-STOP IT! BAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
Ben-kun: NOPE! ^.^
NoName-chan: BAHAHAHA- BITCH, STOP! *kicks Ben in the eye*
Ben-kun: *falls backwards onto the ground, clutching his eye* OW!
NoName-chan: *stands up and casually brushes dust off of my clothes as Ben writhes in pain* I warned you.
Ben-kun: *starts rolling around on the ground in agony*
NoName-chan: *stares down at myself in disgust* Great, now I have to go take a goddamn shower! *stomps upstairs muttering something about "Stupid Ben-kun!"*
Tyki: So... *looks over to Piña* Mind if I go get a drink?
Pineapplebombgirl: *still clinging to Lavi* Go right ahead! ^^ Kitchen's down the hall, first door to the left.
Tyki: 'Kay, thanks! ^^ *walks to the kitchen*
Allen: Why do I get the feeling something terrible yet hilarious is about to happen...?
Pineapplebombgirl: I have no clue~ ^^
*WITH TYKI*
Tyki: *walks into the kitchen with the lights off* Okay, now where's the fridge...? *stumbles blindly through the darkness, feeling around and finding just about everything except the fridge* JESUS CHRIST, WHERE THE HELL- *trips and falls, smacking face first into the side of the fridge* There it is... T.T
Allen: *runs in and turns on the lights* I HEARD A NOISE- oh, it's just you. What happened?
Tyki: *groans* Darkness... Refrigerator... SMACK! *passes out from minor head trauma*
Allen: *Sweat drops* He tripped into the fridge?... Oh, whatever *grins* Might as well get some food while I'm in here! *gets a piece of bread and walks up to the toaster*
*WITH THE OTHERS*
Ben-kun: *suddenly stops rolling around and sits up straight with a serious expression*
Pineapplebombgirl: *still hugging Lavi* Ben-kun? You okay?
Ben-kun: *shakes himself from his daze* U-um yeah, I'm fine! It's just... I have this odd feeling that something stupid is about to happen...
*WITH ALLEN*
Allen: *inspecting the toaster* How the hell do I use this thing...? *pokes it with the piece of bread and sighs* I guess I'll go ask NoName-chan... *walks upstairs to the bathroom and opens the door*
NoName-chan: *showering*
Allen: *yanks back the shower curtain* Hey, NoName-chan, how do I use-?
NoName-chan: *SCREAM. Throws a huge bottle of shampoo at Allen*
Allen: *Gets hit in the smack middle of the forehead* AH!
NoName-chan: *calms down* Oh, it's just you. What do you want?
Allen: *holds up the toaster* How do I work this thing?
NoName-chan: ... The same way you work any other toaster...
Allen: *blank stare* How do I do that?
NoName-chan: *Facepalm* Here, follow me. *wraps a towel around myself and walks downstairs to the kitchen*
Allen: *follows me*
NoName-chan: *walks into kitchen* Alright, now- *sees Tyki's unconscious body*
... *shrugs and pushes it under a rug with my foot*
Allen: ...
NoName-chan: Okay, Allen, *takes the toaster and plugs it into the wall* first, you plug in the toaster, *puts a piece of bread in the slot* then, you put the bread in, *pushes down the lever on the side* and finally, you push the thingy down. Now, just wait for the bell thingy to ring and take the toast from the toaster, 'Kay?
Allen: *beams* alright! ^^
NoName-chan: Now, back to my showe-
Kanda: *walks into the room and gapes when she sees towel-wearing me* OH GOD MY VIRGIN EYES MAKE IT STOP! *knocks himself out with a frying pan*
NoName-chan: The fuck? O.o
Toaster: *DING-A-FREAKIN-LING*
Allen: YAY, TOAST~! ^^ *grabs for the toast*
NoName-chan: WAIT, ALLEN, STOP! IT'S-
Allen: *touches the toast and screams, jumping back and clutching his burnt hand*
NoName-chan: -hot... *siiigh* Whatever, I have a shower to get to. *goes back upstairs to the bathroom, drops the towel, and pulls back the shower curtain*
Lavi: *IN THE FUCKING SHOWER FOR SOME REASON*
NoName-chan and Lavi: *see each other. SCREAM* OH GOD MY VIRGIN EYES MAKE IT STOP!
NoName-chan: *in shortage of Bathroom Shovels, knocks Lavi out with the toilet plunger* JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, ASK BEFORE USING SOMEONE ELSE'S SHOWER!
Pineapplebombgirl: *walks into the bathroom* Hey, NoName-chan, where did you put the pretze- *sees naked Lavi* JACKPOT~! *drags him away*
NoName-chan: ... Riiiight... *shrugs and finishes my shower*
/Flashback End/
Lenalee: Wait, what? I'm confused, what exactly does that have to do with your moods today?
Allen: My hand hurts! T.T *raises up burnt hand*
Ben-kun: My eye hurts! T.T *points to black eye*
Tyki: My head hurts! T.T *rubs head*
Kanda and Lavi: *curled up in the corner, shaking* Some things cannot be un-seen... O_O
NoName-chan: They were only over for five minutes and we were all already traumatized! T.T
Lenalee: Wait, NoName-chan, I understand their stories, but how were YOU traumatized?
NoName-chan: LAVI USED ALL MY SHAMPOO! T_T
Road: *sighs* Well, we've got an Episode-Chapter-Thingy to attend to! So, guys, STOP MOPING!
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *groan even louder*
Lenalee: Guysss! Come on! We've got shit to do!
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *GROAN EVEN LOUDER*
Lenalee: *hangs head in exhaustion* This is useless...
Road: Don't give up quite yet, Lena! I still have a trick or two up my sleeve!
Lenalee: Really? O.o What?
Road: *grins and whispers something into my ear*
NoName-chan: *eyes shoot wide. Jumps up from my seat furiously* THEY ATE ALL THE TACOS IN THE SNACK ROOM?! *takes out shovel*
Lenalee: O.O Oh god...
Road: *grins*
NoName-chan: DIE, MOTHERFUCKERS! *starts beating Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, and Tyki with the shovel*
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *scream in pain* OW! OW! WHAT THE HEL-?! OW!
Lenalee: *sweat drops* Don't you think that was a bit extreme?...
Road: *grins evilly* Not one bit~
Lenalee: *sighs* Well, we should probably tell NoName-chan that you were just kidding...
Road: *leans back and starts eating popcorn* Nah, let's wait a few minutes~
Lenalee: *sweat drops*
*5 minutes later*
NoName-chan: *still beating the guys with the shovel* DIE ALREADY!
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *still screaming in pain* WHAT DID WE DOOOO? T_T
Road: *sighs* Okay, this is getting boring. NoName-chan, just kidding! They didn't actually eat the tacos!
NoName-chan: *murderous expression suddenly turns into a sweet smile as I stop beating the guys* Oh, okay then! ^^ Guys, you can go sit down now.
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: o.e *sigh and go sit on their respective couches*
NoName-chan: *sits down on the red couch with a dazzling grin* Welcome back to D Gray-Show~! I'm your fabulous hostess, NoName-chan-
Kanda: *snorts* Fabulous my ass!
Allen: Coming from a guy in a skirt? -.-
Kanda: *glares at him and angrily fiddles with the pleated miniskirt he's wearing for his today's part of his Dress Up Dare*
NoName-chan: *hits them both over the heads with the shovel* SHUT UP~! Anyways, here's my Co-Host, Ben-kun~! *dramatically gestures to Ben*
Ben-kun: *smiles and waves shyly*
NoName-chan: And here are our contestants~! ^^ *gestures even more dramatically to the contestants*
Allen, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki, Road: *smile and wave*
Kanda: *glares at everything*
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* BITCH, WAVE!
Kanda: *growls and waves*
NoName-chan: Now, let's-
*An adorable pale girl a few inches shorter than me with mid-length brown hair with dyed blonde highlights and hazel eyes bursts onto the stage*
Mystery Person: *pokes my cheek repeatedly* WHAT ABOUT MEEEEEEEEEE?
NoName-chan: YOU ARE NOT A HOSTESS, NOW SHUT IT!
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: *raise an eyebrow* Who the hell is that?
NoName-chan: Yuno-chan. She's my daughter.
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: *gape* WHAT?! 0.0
Ben-kun: *bursts into tears and glomps me* NOOOOO! MY DEAR BABY SISTER HAS KIDS?! T.T *murderous expression* Who the hell is the father?!
NoName-chan: *facepalm* No, no, she's not my ACTUAL daughter! She's the same age as me, that's not even possible! No, what I meant is that Yuno-chan is one of my best friends. My friends and I are basically just one big family: Jen-chan's the Daddy, I'm the Mommy, and just about everyone else is either one of our many kids or is connected to us in some illegal or incestious way.
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: o.e
NoName-chan: Anyways, Yuno-chan is one of my best friends who I recently converted to DGM-
Allen: You make it sound like we're a religion...
99.9% of the DGM Fangirl Population: YOU AAARRRRREEEE
NoName-chan: -and she decided to come see the show today. HOWEVER, she is NOT a hostess, so YUNO-CHAN! GO SIT DOWN!
YunoSnuggles-Chan: NO! :P
NoName-chan: SIT DOWN RIGHT NOW OR I'M STICKING UNCLE BEN-KUN ON YOU!
Yuno-chan: *rolls eyes* Fiiiiiine! But only after I do this: *grins and glomps Allen* AAALLLEEEENNNNN~!
Allen: THE FU-?!
NoName-chan: She's a HUGE Allen Fangirl.
Allen: *sweat drops* Oh god, not another one...
Yuno-chan: :3 *nuzzles Allen's neck*
Lucy Moon-Walker: *jumps up furiously from her seat in the audience* BITCH, GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY MAN!
Yuno-chan: Your man? Bitch, HE'S MINE! *holds up an axe*
Allen: *gapes at the axe* HOLY SHIT! O_O
NoName-chan: *tick mark* YUNO-CHAN! WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT THREATENING OTHER FANGIRLS?!
Yuno-chan: *gives me a blank stare* You told me something about that?
NoName-chan: YES! THE SAME DAY I TOLD YOU WHY YOU SHOULDN'T ATTEMPT CANNIBALISM ON LIVING PEOPLE!
Lavi: What the fuck is wrong with these girls?... 0_0
NoName-chan: NOW GO SIT DOWN, YUNO-CHAN!
Yuno-chan: *stomps back towards her seat in the audience, muttering evil things under her breath before stopping and looking up at me* Erm... I can't remember where I was sitting... 0.0
Pineapplebombgirl: It's okay, Yuno-chan! You can come sit next to me! ^^ *gestures to empty seat next to her*
Yuno-chan: *beams and skips over to sit next to Piña* Thanks, Auntie Piña! ^^
Pineapplebombgirl: *freezes slightly at the name before smiling again* No problem, Yuno-chan~! ^^
NoName-chan: *rolls eyes with a smile* ANYWAYS, we have a show to run~! So, Usagi-Twins, go make the poison food!
Usagi-Twins: *grin and walk to the kitchen*
Allen, Lavi, Tyki: POISON FOOD?! 0.0
NoName-chan: *grins* You'll see. It all has to do with one of today's Dares! *grins even more* So you'll have to hope you're not the one that Dare is for.
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki, Lenalee: *YELP*
Road: *grins* Bring it on~
NoName-chan: *grins* That's the spirit~! Anyways, on that topic, let's start with the Dare Round today!
Allen: Don't we do that every day?...
NoName-chan: Let's begin! *slip of paper appears in my hand* This one's for Allen~!
Allen: *gulps*
NoName-chan: It reads:
"Beansprout,
I dare you to dump a potion on yourself.
~myangelicladyofdarkness"
Allen: *HUGE sigh of relief* Oh thank god, it isn't me! ^^
Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: Oh dear god, it isn't him! T_T
NoName-chan: ANYWAYS, *holds up a randomly appearing potion* I stol- I mean, "borrowed" this from Komui's office this morning. Have at it~!
Allen: *takes the potion from me and sighs. Dumps it on himself*
Road: *holds up Blackmail Camera and grins* This is gonna be good!
NoName-chan: *grins*
Allen: *starts leaning back and forth* I feel a bit... *is suddenly enveloped in a cloud of green smoke with a "POOF!" When the smoke disappears, we see that this has caused him to have tattoos of beansprouts all over his body*
Kanda and Lavi: *burst out laughing*
Allen: *tick mark* Okay, who the hell gave Komui the idea to make THIS?!
NoName-chan: We will never know... *cough*Kanda*cough*
Allen: *glares at Kanda* WHY, YOU SON OF A-
NoName-chan: ANYWAYS, *piece of paper appears in my hand* Our next Dare is for... Lavi~!
Lavi: *shakes in fear*
NoName-chan: It reads:
"Lavi,
I dare you to make out with Lenalee for five minutes.
~Lucy Moon-Walker"
Lavi: *Pales*
Lenalee: *blushes crimson*
Lavi: OH GOD, I'M NOT WHICH IS WORSE: THIS OR POISON!
Lenalee: HEY! *Hits Lavi over the head with her clipboard*
Lavi: OW! WHAT THE HELL?!
Lenalee: Kissing me is NOT that bad!
Lavi: Eh? *LIGHTBULB* OOOOOOHHHH. No, no, I meant-
Lenalee: *eyes narrow* Be careful how you answer this.
Lavi: -that I'm not sure what's worse: Komui's wrath or Poison.
Lenalee: *puts down chainsaw that I've only now told you she was holding* Oh, okay then. You can live ^^
Lavi: Easy for you to say….. T_T
NoName-chan: *grins* Oh, don't worry! Komui won't kill you!
Lavi: *looks up at me from his emo-ness* R-really? How do you know?
NoName-chan: *grins even more* Because I have a little Pre-Torture Round Torture of my own today! Komui, COME ON IN~!
Komui: *walks into the room and onto the stage* You asked to see me, NoName-chan?
NoName-chan: Yup! ^^ *tazes Komui*
Komui: ASDFGHJKLAUGHAUGAH! *collapses*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: WTF?! 0.0
NoName-chan: What? We can't have him interrupting the kiss~ *grins and ties Komui to a chair* Or any of today's Episode-Chapter-Thingy, for that matter! So his Torture is to watch the whole thing *ducktapes Komui's mouth shut* without saying a word~!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: 0.0
NoName-chan: Now, Lavi! Lenalee! Get to kissing! Road! Get to taping!
Road: *grins and holds up camera* I'm on it~!
Lavi and Lenalee: *blush furiously and sigh before starting to kiss gently*
Allen: *smiles slightly* Aww, they're kind of cute together! They seem so sweet, and-
NoName-chan: *slams Lavi's and Lenalee's heads closer together* BITCHES, KISS HARDER! THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE MAKING OUT, NOT PECKING YOUR GRANDMOTHER ON THE CHEEK! KISS LIKE YOU'RE KISSING YOUR SISTER!
Allen: o.e
Lavi and Lenalee: *start actually making out*
NoName-chan: *smirks* Better.
*5 minutes later*
NoName-chan: Aaaaaand... Done!
Lavi and Lenalee: *pull back, gasping for air*
NoName-chan: *looks at Road* Got all that?
Road: *smirks and holds up camera* Yup~!
NoName-chan: *grins* send me the tapes later~
Road: Sure thing~!
Lavi: Hey, mind sending me one, too?
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lenalee, Tyki: *give Lavi a "WTF?" stare*
Lavi: Whaaaat? I wanna know if I looked good!
Road: Um... Okay, yeah, sure. You can have a tape.
Lavi: YAYZ~! \(^.^)/
NoName-chan: *blink blink* Alrighty then... Anyways, moving on~! *slip of paper appears in my hand* This one's for Lenalee~! It reads:
"Lenalee,
I dare you to make out with Road for five minutes after Lavi's done with you.
~Lucy Moon-Walker"
Lenalee: *gapes*
Ben-kun: *squeals in joy and gets a nosebleed*
Komui: *snaps awake at the dare and starts thrashing around in his ropes*
Road: *grins and holds her Blackmail Camera out to me* mind taping this one for me?
NoName-chan: *grins and takes camera* No problem~
Road: *smirks and starts making out with Lenalee intensely*
Lenalee: *eyes widen a bit*
Ben-kun: *NOSEBLEED*
Lavi: *desperately resisting the urge to nosebleed*
Allen: *giving this whole situation a "WTF?" stare*
Kanda and Tyki: *shaking in fear at the possibility one of them has the Poison Food Dare*
*5 minutes later*
NoName-chan: 'Kay, time's up!
Lenalee and Road: *pull back, panting*
Road: *looks at me* Got it?
NoName-chan: *holds up camera* Yup~!
Road: Awesome! *smirks and takes camera*
Allen and Lenalee: o.e
NoName-chan: Anyways, next Dare~! *slip of paper appears in my hand* This one's for... Tyki~!
Tyki: *trembles nervously*
NoName-chan: It reads:
"Perv,
I dare you to set Yuu-chan's hair on fire.
~myangelicladyofdarkness"
Tyki: Wait, why would you assume that's for me? O.o
NoName-chan and Road: Why WOULDN'T we assume that's for you?
Tyki: *sighs* Well, at least I only have to... SET KANDA'S HAIR ON FIRE?! O.O
Allen and Lavi: *laugh asses off*
Road: *holds up Blackmail Camera and prepares to tape again*
Ben-kun: NoName-chan, are you sure this is okay? I mean, remember what happened LAST time you let someone use fire in the NoName-chan Fanficion Co. Building? O.o
NoName-chan: *shudders at the memory of Tyki crashing into a coffee table, catching on fire from the candles on the table, running around screaming for 20 minutes, and eventually setting my curtains on fire* My poor curtains... But it's okay, Ben-kun! I made sure to fireproof all the curtains just in case! ^^
Ben-kun: Is that really your only concern about setting Kanda's hair on fire? o.e
NoName-chan: Yup! Have at it, Tyki~! ^^
Tyki: *lights a match and gulps* I'm not sure about this...
Lenalee: It's okay, Tyki! Kanda's still too traumatized about the possibility of having the Poison Food Dare to comprehend anything! He won't even notice! ^^
Tyki: Oh, really? Well, if THAT'S the case... *throws the lit match onto Kanda's head*
Kanda: *still curled up in a ball, shaking*
Match: *continues to burn*
Kanda's hair: *doesn't do anything*
Ben-kun, Allen, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: Huh? O.O *give me a questioning stare*
NoName-chan: HEY, DON'T LOOK AT ME! He must have fireproofed his hair at some point, that's all!
Lavi: *snaps fingers* Oh, I know what this is! This is because of the time I accidentally put Fire Retardant Tree Spray instead of glittery gold hair dye in Yuu-chan's shampoo!
Ben-kun: ...
Allen: How did you mess that one up? O.o
NoName-chan: Eh, who cares. We've got shit to do, so someone put out that match out before Kanda accidentally sets Ben-kun on fire or something.
Road: I'm on it! *dumps a randomly appearing cup of hot coffee on Kanda's head*
Coffee: *SIZZLE*
Everyone: O.O ….
Ben-kun, Allen, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: *Look at Road* O.O HOT COFFEE?! REALLY?!
NoName-chan: *hits them each over the head with the shovel* WHO CARES?! MOVING ON! *slip of paper appears in my hand* Okay, this one's for Road~! It reads:
"Road,
We dare you to make out with Kanda for two minutes.
~Usagi-Twins"
Allen: Geez, what's with all the kissing today? O.o
Tyki: And why am I not in on it? O.o
Allen, Lavi, Lenalee: *give Tyki a "WTF?" stare*
Lavi: Also, why would someone dare Road to kiss Kanda? o.e
NoName-chan: Heh... ^^;;;
Lavi: ...Oh my god, they didn't, did they?
NoName-chan: Nope! The Twins dared ANYBODY to make out with Kanda for two minutes. I just chose Road~
Lavi: Why? O.O
NoName-chan: Because I have seen every possible pairing between you guys in a fanfiction at some point: Yullen, Laven, AlLena, AllenxRoad, Poker Pair, LaviYuu, LaviLena, LavixRoad, Lucky, KaLena, RoLena, TykiLena, TykixRoad-
Allen: What the hell have you been reading...? O.o
NoName-chan: -except one: KandaxRoad. I have NEVER seen that before. Therefore, I've decided to make it happen myself!
Allen, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: WHY?
NoName-chan: *ignores them* ANYWAYS, Road?
Road: *grins* Come here, Pretty Boy! *starts making out with still-petrified Kanda*
Kanda: *shakes out of his trance* MMPH?!
NoName-chan: *recording this whole thing* How beautiful~! ^^
*2 minutes later*
NoName-chan: Okay, time's up! ^^
Road: *still making out with Kanda*
NoName-chan: ...Road? Time's up! You can stop now...
Road: *pulls back for a brief second* Yeah, yeah, I'll do it in a minute! *goes back to making out with Kanda*
NoName-chan: *sweat drops*
Allen: Should we do something about this...?
NoName-chan: Probably... *rubs invisible beard methodically* Hm... *snaps fingers* I'VE GOT IT! Road, if you stop right now, I'll let you take Kanda home with you!
Road: *releases Kanda* DEAL! *skips back to her spot and sits down*
Kanda: *gasps for air*
Allen: Er…. BaKanda? You okay?
Kanda: *panting* Yeah, I'm fine….. It's just…. *looks at Road* Where did you learn to do THAT with your tongue? O_o
Ben-kun, Allen, Lavi, Lenalee: O.O
Road: *Grins* Tyki taught me~
Tyki: *tears up happily* My sweet little niece has learned so well~! :')
Lavi: *gapes at Kanda* She did THAT?! I nearly died when Tyki did that during my Rape Torture!
Ben-kun, Allen, Lenalee: O.O
Kanda: *Not really giving a shit anymore* Yeah, yeah…... *sniffs the air* Hey, why does it smell like burning Christmas Tree Fire Retardant Spray in here?
Tyki: How does he know what that smells like…? O.o
Kanda: *Ignores Tyki* Well?
NoName-chan: Long story. MOVING ON~! The last Dare, of course, is for Kanda~! And you all know what THAT means! *grins*
Kanda: *pales* Oh god... 0.0
NoName-chan: Yup! *slip of paper appears in my hand* It reads:
"Kanda,
We dare you to let us shove random food (we can cook the food if you want) down your throat (we can tie you to a chair, and if you don't want to open your mouth, we can cut you, shoot your legs, or hit you.)
~Usagi-Twins"
Kanda: *gapes*
Allen: Wait a minute... I THOUGHT THE FOOD WAS POISONOUS!
NoName-chan: When did I ever say that?
Allen: AT THE BEGINNING! You told the Twins to go make the "Poison Food!"
NoName-chan: Yeah. Poison Food. That was our Codename for "Food to Shove Down Kanda's Throat."
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: REALLY?!
NoName-chan: Yup~! *grins* You people worry too much! I mean, COME ON! I can't KILL you guys! That's bad for Ratings!
Allen: *slams his face down on the coffee table* I give up...
NoName-chan: GOOD! Anyways, *faster than the blink of an eye, ties Kanda to a chair* Twins! Is the food ready?
Usagi-Twins: *grin and walk into the room, pushing a HUGE trolley of food* Yup~!
NoName-chan: *grins and hands them each a knife, a gun, and a shovel* Then have at it~!
Usagi-Twins: *grin and start shoving food down Kanda's throat*
Kanda: AUGHAUGHGUGAHGAUHAJABDAKSJVODFJRROIGJCRT,SX?/! STOP, BITCHES!
Usagi-Twins: NEVARRR! *Attempt to shove more food down Kanda's throat*
Kanda: *Snaps his mouth shut*
Usagi-Twins: *Grin and punch Kanda* OPEN UP!
Kanda: *YELP*
Usagi-Twins: *shove more food down his throat*
*20 minutes of food-based torture and beatings later*
Usagi-Twins: *smirks and push the (now empty) trolley away*
Kanda: *gasping for air with multiple wounds in his body*
NoName-chan: *smiles and unties him* Wonderful~!
Kanda: *glares at me* YOU'RE EVIL.
NoName-chan: *grins evilly* I know~ *smiles brightly again* Anyways, we've wasted a lot of time on the Dare Round, so let's go ahead and move on to... The Question Round~!
Ben-kun and Road: *cheer*
Allen and Lavi: *groan*
Lenalee and Tyki: *pokerface*
Kanda: *still gasping for air*
NoName-chan: Alrighty then, *slip of paper appears in my hand* First one's for... Road~! It reads:
"Hey, Road,
Wanna go on a killing spree with me later? ;D
~Yuno-chan"
Road: *grins and looks at Yuno* Gladly~!
Yuno-chan: *cheers in joy*
NoName-chan: OO! OO! Can I come, too? :D
Yuno-chan: Sure, Mom! ^^
NoName-chan: AWESOME~! So, this weekend?
Yuno-chan and Road: Yup~! ^^
NoName-chan: Great! ^^ Anyways, next Question~! *slip of paper appears in my hand* This one's for... Lavi~! It reads:
"Lavi,
How does your hair do that with the headband? Our bother's hair does the same thing! His hair first goes down then goes to the side; it fucking defies gravity! It's like, the fuck?
~Usagi-Twins"
Lavi: ...
NoName-chan: ... How DOES your hair do that? I'm curious, too...
Lavi: *sighs* Well, to answer your Question, I don't know how my hair does that. It's just like a cowlick sort of thing.
NoName-chan and Usagi-Twins: BULLSHIT IT IS!
Lavi: 0.0;;;
NoName-chan: *sighs* Well, I guess we'll go ahead and move on 'cause we have a Timeslot... *slip of paper appears in my hand* This one's for... Tyki~! It reads:
"Oi, Tyki,
Are you a descendent of Pedobear?
~Lucy Moon-Walker"
Tyki: *throws hands up in annoyance* Why does everyone keep asking that?!
Allen: *Sarcastic tone* I WONDER?
Tyki: The answer to that Question is so obvious! YES, HE'S MY UNCLE!
NoName-chan, Lucy Moon-Walker, Road, myangelicladyofdarkness: I FUCKING KNEW IT!
Tyki: ...
NoName-chan: *clears throat* AHEM…. Um... Moving on... *slip of paper appears in my hand* This one's for... Kanda~! It reads:
"Kanda,
Are you gay? If so, go fuck Lavi... I need fanservice...
~Lucy Moon-Walker"
Lavi: *Throws hands up in exasperation* WHY DOES EVERYONE ALWAYS DEMAND THAT I GET FUCKED?
NoName-chan: Not everyone… only…
Pineapplebombgirl: *jumps up from her seat furiously and stomps onto the stage* LUCY! THAT IS THE SECOND TIME YOU'VE DEMANDED THAT SOMEONE HAD SEX WITH LAVI! WHAT THE HELL?!
Lucy Moon-Walker: *stomps onto the stage and growls in Piña's face* Because Yuuvi doesn't involve my Allen-
Yuno-chan: YOUR ALLEN-?!
NoName-chan and Lucy Moon-Walker: YUNO, SHUT IT!
Yuno-chan: *glares at us evilly*
Lucy Moon-Walker: *looks back to Piña* -and, quite frankly, your little Bunny-Boy is much better in any yaoi pairing than he is with you.
Pineapplebombgirl: *snarl* Coming from the girl whose love is the Uke of nearly every DGM yaoi pairing there is?!
Lucy Moon-Walker: OH, YOU WANNA GO?!
Pineapplebombgirl: BRING IT!
NoName-chan: *appears between them and sprays water with one of those spray bottles that you use to punish cats in Lucy's and Piña's faces* NO! NO! STOP IT! STOP IT RIGHT NOW! FANGIRL FIGHTS ARE BAD FOR RATINGS! GO SIT DOWN!
Lucy Moon-Walker and Pineapplebombgirl: WHAT-
NoName-chan: *sprays them again* BAD FANGIRLS! GO SIT DOWN!
Lucy Moon-Walker and Pineapplebombgirl: *walk back to their seats, grumbling*
NoName-chan: *beams* Alright, now, Kanda? Are you gay? ^^
NoName-chan's, Road's, and Lenalee's thoughts: 'PleaseBeGayPleaseBeGayPleaseBeGay...'
Kanda: Che. NO!
Road: BULLSHIT YOU AREN'T!
Kanda: BUT I'M NOT!
NoName-chan: *blink blink* Really? O.o
Kanda: *tick mark* DUH!
NoName-chan: Oh, okay. Well, go have sex with Lavi!
Kanda and Lavi: WHAT?! BUT THE QUESTION SAID-
NoName-chan: *hits them both over the head with the shovel* AND I SAID YOU TWO ARE HAVING SEX! NOW GO TO THE CONSENSUAL SEX ROOM AND BE BACK IN TEN MINUTES!
Ben-kun: Wait, you have both a Rape Room AND a Consensual Sex Room? O.o
NoName-chan: Well, I have to have SOMEWHERE for General Cross to go! Which reminds me, *hands Kanda $5 bucks* he's probably in there right now, so would you mind giving him this for me? I still owe him for that time he harvested that kidney for me, and-
Kanda: *takes money* DON'T WANNA HEAR IT! Come on, let's just go...
Kanda and Lavi: *stomp out of the room and off to the Consensual Sex Room*
NoName-chan: Alright, moving on! ^^ *slip of paper appears in my hand* This one's for... Lenalee~! It reads:
"Hey, Lenalee,
Can I have a copy of a Blackmail Tape?
~myangelicladyofdarkness"
Lenalee: *beams* Sure~! ^^ Just tell me which one you want, and I'll get it to your house within 3-4 Business Days!
myangelicladyofdarkness: Okay~! Well, Hm... What tapes do you have?
Lenalee: Currently, I have "Allen's Shower Singing" Volumes 1-4, "Lavi's Prank Failures" Volumes 3-7, "Kanda's Bathroom Dancing" Volumes 2-5, and, if you're willing to wait 5-8 Business Days, I can get you a copy of today's make out sessions~! ^^
myangelicladyofdarkness: Hm... I guess I'll take... "Kanda's Bathroom Dancing" Volume 5.
Lenalee: A fantastic choice~! ^^ *gives her the tape*
myangelicladyofdarkness: *grins* Sweet!
NoName-chan: Great~! Moving on! *slip of paper appears in my hand* This one, of course, is for Allen~! It reads:
"Allen,
WILL YOU MARRY ME? Or at least take me on a date?
~Lucy Moon-Walker"
Ben-kun, Lenalee, Tyki, Road: MARRIAGE?! O.O
Allen: UM… 0.0;;;
NoName-chan: *stands up* OKAY, hold on! I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I can't marry anyone off on this show!
Lenalee and Tyki: Wait…. You aren't going to force any marriage on this show? You mean….. *GASP* YOU HAVE MORALS?!
NoName-chan: *SNORT* PFFT, NO! I mean, I literally CAN'T marry anyone off on this show.
Ben-kun: You can't? Why? 0.0
NoName-chan: Because, when I tricke- er... I mean, "convinced" Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki, and Road to sign the legal documents that gave me full authority to beat them, force them to do horrible things, or even kill them, I didn't think to include the ability to force them to marry people. Therefore, I didn't tell the Network about the possibility of marriage before this thing first aired, and if I were to force someone to get married or even HAVE a marriage on this show, I could get in a lot of trouble! So, if anybody is getting married, you'll have to do it on your own time without any connection to the show for the reasoning.
Ben-kun, Lenalee, Tyki: 0.0
Allen: *Sweat drops* Um... Well, marriage is moving a bit fast anyways... But I guess I'll take Lucy on a date? ^^;;;
Lucy Moon-Walker: *jumps in joy* YAY~! ^^
Yuno-chan: *jumps up furiously* OH HELL NO! YOU ARE NOT GOING TO DATE MY MAN, LUCY!
Lucy Moon-Walker: *Smirks* Oh really? JUST HAPPENED, BITCH!
Yuno-chan: *gets all up in Lucy's face* DON'T MAKE ME USE SNUGGLES! *holds up her axe, "Snuggles," threateningly*
Lucy Moon-Walker: DON'T MAKE ME USE THE MONKEY STICK! *holds up Monkey Stick*
NoName-chan: *holds up Fangirl Spray Bottle threateningly* THAT IS BAD FOR RATIN-
Yuno-chan and Lucy Moon-Walker: SHUT THE HELL UP, NONAME-CHAN!
NoName-chan: *YELP. Hides behind the couch*
Yuno-chan and Lucy Moon-Walker: *Go back to arguing and threatening each other*
Ben-kun: *Yelps in fear at their fight. Looks around frantically* S-SOMEONE DO SOMETHING! O.O NoName-chan?
NoName-chan: *trembles in fear behind the couch* The two most deadly and frightening fangirls in the entire world are fighting. Fuck this shit, man, I'm out!
Ben-kun: Er... Road? o.o;;;
Road: *grins and puts a piece of popcorn in her mouth* Fuck that, this is too hilarious to interrupt!
Ben-kun: U-UM... ALLEN? TYKI? O.O;;;
Allen and Tyki: NONAME-CHAN is afraid of these people. Like hell if we're doing anything!
Ben-kun: *sweats nervously* Oh god... What am I going to do?! O.O;;;;;;
Lenalee: *tick mark* Okay, THAT'S ENOUGH! *hits Yuno and Lucy over the heads with her clipboard*
Yuno-chan and Lucy Moon-Walker: O.O
Lenalee: GO SIT DOWN RIGHT NOW, OR SO HELP ME GOD, I WILL UNLEASH HELL ON THIS PLACE! YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!
Everybody: O.O ...
Yuno-chan and Lucy Moon-Walker: Y-yes ma'am... O.O *walk back to their seats shakily*
NoName-chan: *grins and jumps back onto the red couch* Thanks, Lenalee~!
Lenalee: No problem~! ^^
NoName-chan: So it's settled: Allen and Lucy have a date tonight! Now, time to-
Kanda and Lavi: *slam the door open and walk in*
*slow motion close up of the door slamming against the wall, causing a small splinter of wood to break off*
NoName-chan: *freezes and watches the splinter of wood to fall to the ground*
Ben-kun: *Sees the look on my face* ... N-NoName-chan? 0.0;;;
NoName-chan: *a dark aura surrounds me as I continue to stare at the splinter*
Kanda: Oi, what's wrong with her?
NoName-chan: You... Assholes... Broke... My door...
Lavi: *YELP* N-Now, NoName-chan, let's just talk about this! O.O
NoName-chan: *sickly sweet smile and disturbingly calm tone* What's there to talk about, Lavi? *holds up shovel* It's time for you to die~! ^^
Kanda and Lavi: *YELP*
Lenalee: OH MY GOD, COMMERCIAL BREAK!
Random Camera Guy: I'M ON IT!
*COMMERCIAL SEQUENCE BEGIN*
"ALLEN'S SHOWER SINGING VOLUMES 1-4~!" *99.9% of the Allen fangirl population orders*
"LAVI'S PRANK FAILURES VOLUMES 3-7~!" *99.9% of the Lavi fangirl population orders*
"KANDA'S BATHROOM DANCING VOLUMES 2-5~!" *99.9% of the Kanda fangirl population orders*
"TODAY'S MAKE OUT SESSIONS TAPE~!" *99.9% of the entire DGM fangirl population orders*
"SHOVELS~!" *NoName-chan orders*
*COMMERCIAL SEQUENCE END*
*we return to our set once again. Everybody is in their respective sitting places once again with me smirking and polishing my shovel, and Kanda and Lavi bandaged head to toe*
NoName-chan: *grins* Welcome back~!
Kanda and Lavi: *Curled up in a ball, shivering* SHOVELS…. SHOVELS EVERYWHERE!
NoName-chan: *Grins* Now, without wasting any time, let's-
Random Domino's Pizza Delivery Guy: *Runs onto the stage, kicks Tyki in the face, and jumps onto the coffee table* FEAR ME, CHEESY PRETZELS!
Everybody: WHAT THE FUCK?! O.o
Tyki: *holds cheek in pain* OW!
Pizza Guy: That is all~ *bows and walks off the stage calmly*
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki, Road, Fangirls: *Look at me demandingly*
NoName-chan: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME FOR?! I'M JUST AS CONFUSED AS YOU ARE! O.O
Pizza Guy: *walks up to Piña* I did it!
Pineapplebombgirl: Thanks, Jaxon~! ^^ *gives him $5 bucks*
Jaxon: *takes the money* No problem! *leaves*
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, tyki, Road: *sweat drop* Oh, that explains it….
Pineapplebombgirl: Teehee~ ^.^
Lavi: Why did she hire a Pizza Guy to come do that? O.o
NoName-chan: Moving on~! Let's mix it up and jump straight to the Random Round~! *the box of Randomness Popsicle sticks appears on my lap*
Lavi: AAAND she ignores me….. -.-;;;
NoName-chan: First up, since he's apparently feeling sassy, let's have… Lavi~! ^^
Lavi: Sassy? O.o Since when am I-
Pineapplebombgirl and Road: SHUT UP, MR. SASS!
NoName-chan: *selects a random Popsicle stick* Lavi, your randomness is... Another Dare~! It reads:
"Lavi,
KISS BEANSPROUT! NOW!
~Usagi-Twins"
Allen: *blushes crimson* W-WHAT-?! HE ISN'T GOING TO KISS ME! LAVI'S MY FRIEND! HE WOULD NEVER-
Lavi: *kisses Allen*
99.9% of the yaoi fangirl population: *NOSEBLEED*
Lavi: *pulls back*
Allen: W-WHAT- WHY- HUH?!
NoName-chan: Moving on~! Next let's have... Allen~! *selects a Popsicle stick* Your randomness is... A Double Question~! Your first question reads:
"Allen,
Who would you rather fuck: Kanda, Lavi, or Tyki?
~Usagi-Twins"
Allen: *GAPE*
NoName-chan, Usagi-Twins, Lenalee, Road: ... Well?
Allen: *gulps* U-um... I guess... Lavi?
Lavi: *jumps up happily* YES~!
Tyki: Damn it!
Kanda: *gives them both a "WTF?" stare*
Candy: I fuckin' knew it! Choco, you owe me ten bucks!
Choco: God damn it, Allen, you should've picked Kanda! Why Lavi?!
Allen: Well, because Kanda's a total asshole, and Tyki's a pedophilic rapist, plus Lavi and I JUST kissed, so...
NoName-chan: *nods head and strokes invisible beard methodically* Ah, that makes sense. Well, Allen, Lavi, off to the Consensual Sex Room you go~!
Allen: WHAT?!
Lavi: Aw, sweet! *picks Allen up like a princess and runs out of the room*
Ben-kun: ... Doesn't Allen have another question to answer...?
NoName-chan: Just give 'em ten minutes... *watching the monitor for the hidden cameras in the Consensual Sex Room with the Usagi-Twins, Road, and Lenalee*
*ten minutes of massive nosebleeds later*
Allen and Lavi: *walk back in and sit down*
NoName-chan: Nice to see you're back~! ^^ Anyways, Allen, time for your second Question~! It reads:
"Hey, Allen,
...Can we hang out?
~Mokatty"
Allen: *smiles kindly* Sure ^^
NoName-chan: Wonderful~! Okay, Allen, *hands Allen a wad of cash* here's $50 bucks. Go take Mokatty to a club or something.
Allen: *takes the money and salutes* I'm on it! *gets an overjoyed Mokatty from the audience and leaves*
NoName-chan: Okay, while Allen does that, let's move on~! Next let's have... Lenalee~! *selects Popsicle stick* You have... Another Question~! It reads:
"Lenalee,
Where do you get your boots? They're fucking legit!
~Usagi-Twins"
Lenalee: *beams* Why thank you~! ^^ The boots I usually wear are my Innocence, but I get all my other boots from Payless Shoe Source! ^^
Ben-kun: I KNEW IT~! *makes a mental note to go to Payless later*
NoName-chan: …..Anyways, next let's have... Kanda~! *tries to select a Popsicle stick, but ends up picking up two by accident* ...
Ben-kun: Hasn't this happened before...?
NoName-chan: Yup~! *grins* looks like Kanda's doing two Randomnesses today~!
Kanda: WHAT-
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* SHUT UP~! YOU'RE DOING TWO RANDOMNESSES TODAY, AND THAT'S FINAL!
Kanda: KSJFNERJGNRIGD4O5DHKD?/!
NoName-chan: Anyways, your first Randomness is... OO! A Combo Dare~!
Kanda: *pales at the memory of singing the Onion Song with Allen*
NoName-chan: It reads:
"Kanda,
I dare you and Tyki to spar with Road~!
~MagicSinger"
Kanda and Tyki: *gape in horror*
Road: *grins and surrounds herself with pointy candles* Let's begin~!
Kanda and Tyki: *YELP*
Lenalee: HOLY SHIT, COMMERCIAL BREAK!
Random Camera Guy: 'Kay 'Kay~!
*COMMERCIAL SEQUENCE BEGIN*
"KANDA AND LAVI'S SEX TAPE~!" *99.9% of the LaviYuu fangirl population orders*
"LAVI AND ALLEN'S SEX TAPE~!" *99.9% of the Laven fangirl population orders*
"AXES AND KNIVES~!" *Yuno orders*
"MONKEY STICKS AND CURSED SWORDS~!" *Lucy orders*
"MORE SHOVELS~! *NoName-chan orders*
*COMMERCIAL SEQUENCE END*
*we return to our set where everybody but Allen is back on their respective couches. Road is grinning sadistically, and Kanda and Tyki are covered in bandages*
NoName-chan: *grins* And, we're back~!
Kanda and Tyki: *glare at me* I HATE YOU.
NoName-chan: Love ya, too~! Now, Kanda, your other Randomness is... Another Dare~! It reads:
"Kanda,
I dare you to read a Yullen and a Yuuvi fanfic.
~Lucy Moon-Walker"
Kanda: *pales* Oh god...
NoName-chan: *grins and hands Kanda randomly appearing laptop with the respective fanfictions open*
Kanda: *sighs heavily and starts reading*
NoName-chan, Lenalee, Road: *read over his shoulder and immediately get nosebleeds*
Kanda: *Starts off with a pokerface. Eyebrows rise slightly. Eyes widen. Pales. Turns a little green* OH GOD WHY WOULD I DO THAT TO ALLE- *holds a hand up to his mouth. Shakes head, traumatized. Takes the hand away. Gapes and snaps his mouth shut several times before replacing the hand. Turns even greener as his eyes widen even further* BEANSPROUT WOULDN'T- HOW IS THAT PLEASURABL- OH MY GOD! *returns to alternating between gaping and covering his mouth with his hand. Raises a finger as if to say something before bringing his hand back to his mouth again. Puffs out his cheeks in an "I'm about to throw up" way. Turns even greener as his eyes widen even MORE* OH MY FUCKING GOD, HOW IS THAT-?! THAT WOULD KILL HIM! OH MY- *Turns to the side and throws up*
NoName-chan: *Stops fangirling at Kanda's vomiting* AUAGHAGUAGAH! OH MY GOD, EW! GODDAMN IT, KANDA! WHO'S GONNA CLEAN THAT UP?!
Kanda: *reading and turning green again*
NoName-chan: *rolls eyes with a loud sigh before going back to reading again*
*10 more minutes of Kanda vomit and Fangirl nosebleeds later*
Kanda: *slams the laptop shut*
NoName-chan: I SWEAR TO GOD, IF YOU BREAK MY LAPTOP-
Kanda: OH THANK GOD, IT'S OVER…
Lenalee and Road: *SQUEAL* That was AWESOME~!
Lucy Moon-Walker: *smirks* So what'd you think, Kanda?
Kanda: *Rocking back and forth in the corner* ASSES…. ASSES EVERYWHERE….
NoName-chan: *wipes away nose blood* Okay, moving on~! Next, let's have...Tyki~! *selects Popsicle stick* Your Randomness is... Another Dare~! It reads:
"Tyki,
We dare you to let us bet you up with NoName-chan's weapon of choice, fists, kicks, hammers, guns, scythes, machetes, giant books, shovels, etc. for 5 minutes.
~Usagi-Twins"
Tyki: *gapes* W-WHAT...?
NoName-chan: *grins* You heard the ladies~! *gives the Usagi-Twins my trusty shovel* Here's my weapon of choice; just be sure to return it! Everything else you might need is already in the Tyki Torture Room. Now, have at it~!
Usagi-Twins: *grin and drag Tyki out of the room*
Tyki: *screams for help*
*door closes eerily*
Lavi: 0.0 Is he going to be oka-
NoName-chan: Moving on~ Okay, finally, let's have... Road~! *attempts to select one Popsicle stick, but ends up selecting two that are stuck together*
Ben-kun: Again with this? O.o
NoName-chan: *sweat drops* Yeah, we have a pretty shitty Popsicle stick provider... Eh, whatever. Road, your first Randomness is another Question~! It reads:
"Road,
Who do you like to torture the most?
~Usagi-Twins"
Road: *grins* That's easy! Ben-kun, obviously~!
Ben-kun: Haha yeah her favorite torture victim is- WAIT WHAT?!
NoName-chan: *ignore Ben and grins* Of course. And your other Randomness is another Dare~! It reads:
"Road!
I dare you to pretend to be a Vampire! Bite people's necks and drink their blood for the rest of the Episode-Chapter-Thingy!
~MagicSinger"
Ben-kun, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee: *GAPE*
Road: *grins* I'm on it~! *bites Ben's neck and starts drinking his blood*
Ben-kun: ASDFGHJKLAAUAGHAGUAH!
NoName-chan: And that concludes the Random Round~! ^^ Now, for the-
Usagi-Twins: *drag Tyki back in, grinning*
Tyki: *covered in wounds and shaking in horror*
NoName-chan: *grins* glad to see you're back~!
Usagi-Twins: *grin* Glad to be back~! Where should we put the Perv?
NoName-chan: Eh, just put him anywhere.
Usagi-Twins: 'Kay~! *prop Tyki up against a wall, return my shovel, and go sit down*
NoName-chan: Alright, as I was saying, onto the Torture Round~! First to spin the wheel will be... Allen~!
*crickets*
Ben-kun: Uh, NoName-chan? He isn't here...
NoName-chan: *hits Ben over the head with the shovel* No shit, Sherlock! -.- We'll just have to go get him!
Lavi: Or we could move onto someone else until he gets ba-
NoName-chan: Come on! *runs out of the room*
Road: Wait up~! *runs after me*
Ben-kun, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: *sigh and follow us at a normal pace*
*10 minutes later*
NoName-chan: *Stops abruptly* Okay, we're here!
Ben-kun: *stops, panting* Wait, where ARE we?
NoName-chan: The Club. Now, someone go in and get Allen!
Ben-kun: I'm on it~! *runs to the door*
Security Guard: What do you want?
Ben-kun: I need to go inside, and- *looks at the man* General Sokalo? O.o
Security Guard, now identified as Sokalo: Yeah?
Ben-kun: Since when are you a Security Guard? 0.0
Sokalo: Since now.
Ben-kun: Erm... Okay! ^^ Well, I need I get in!
Sokalo: Okay. Let me see your ID.
Ben-kun: I... D?... 0.0;;;
Sokalo: The Bartenders here are too stupid to check who they're giving alcohol too, so we just check the IDs of people before they go in to make sure they're at least 21. Where's your ID?
Ben-kun: Erm... I'm 18... 0.0;;;;
Sokalo: Oh? Then, GET LOST! *literally drop kicks Ben-kun away*
Ben-kun: AAAAAAAHHHHHH! *lands in front of me*
NoName-chan: Well?
Ben-kun: *shaking in horror* SOKALO... ID... DROP KICK...
NoName-chan: Oh, so Sokolo's the Security Guard, and you need your ID to get in, so he drop kicked you for only being 18? Drat, I forgot that Allen probably has a fake ID from his years with Cross...
Ben-kun: *nods head*
Kanda: *stares at me* How the hell did you get that?...
NoName-chan: Doesn't matter. What DOES matter is that we need someone with over the age of 21 to go get Allen. *looks at Tyki* Tyki? You're 50-ish right?
Tyki: I'M 26-
NoName-chan: Doesn't matter. Just go.
Tyki: Um... I can't...
NoName-chan: What? Why not?
Tyki: Because I got my ID taken away by social services that one time I tried to rape that one kid that looked like Lavi at the petting zoo...
Kanda and Lavi: WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?... O.o
NoName-chan: *sighs* Tyki, just try anyway.
Tyki: If you say so... *walks up to Sokalo*
Sokalo: What?
Tyki: I need to get in, please~
Sokalo: Can I see your ID?
Tyki: Err...
Sokalo: *drop kicks Tyki*
Tyki: AAAAAAAHHHHHH! *lands in front of me*
NoName-chan: Well?
Tyki: No luck... T.T
NoName-chan: Hm... ROAD! You're, like, 30, right? Do you have an ID?
Road: *holds up ID* Yup~! *walks up to Sokalo* Oi, I need to get in, and-
Sokalo: There's no way you're 21. *drop kicks Road*
Road: AAAAAAAHHHHHH! *lands in front of me*
NoName-chan: Well?
Road: He didn't even let me try...
NoName-chan: Hm... Kanda! Can you try threatening Sokalo into letting you in?
Kanda: *smirks* I'm on it. *walks up to Sokalo and holds up Mugen* OI, LET ME-
Sokalo: *activates his huge blade Innocence*
Kanda: O.O *gulps*
Sokalo: *drop kicks Kanda*
Kanda: AAAAAAAHHHHHH! *lands in front of me*
NoName-chan: Do I even need to ask how that went...? -.-;;;;
Kanda: Probably not...
NoName-chan: *sighs* Lenalee? Do you think you can get us in with the sex appeal of your feminine charm?
Lenalee: Only if you never say that to me again... *sashays up to Sokalo. Seductive tone* Hey, Big Boy-
Sokalo: *drop kicks Lenalee*
Lenalee: AAAAAAAHHHHHH! *lands in front of me* Nope...T.T
NoName-chan: *sighs irritably and looks at Lavi. Puts a hand on his shoulder and stares intensely into his eyes- er, "eye"* Okay, Lavi, it's up to you this time. The rest have failed, so I'm counting on you. Do whatever you can to get in.
Lavi: *salutes* I'm on it! *walks up to Sokalo* Hey, Sokalo-
Sokalo: *glares at Lavi and growls*
Lavi: *YELP* NEVERMIND! *runs back to me*
NoName-chan: Well?
Lavi: *shakes his head* No luck. He's too scary! T.T
Ben-kun: *sighs* So what can we do now?
Tyki: Hm... Well maybe we can pay someone else to get Allen, or maybe we can-
NoName-chan: *tick mark* Okay, that's it! Since none of you can seem to do ANYTHING to get past Sokalo, I guess I'll have to do this myself! *takes off jacket and hands it to Ben* Now, step aside! I'll show you how it's done! *walks up to Sokalo*
Sokalo: *GROOOWWWLL-*
NoName-chan: *slams Sokalo into a wall* LISTEN! I'M GONNA TELL YOU EXACTLY WHAT'S ABOUT TO GO DOWN: YOU'RE GOING TO LET ME INTO THIS FINE ESTABLISHMENT. YOU ARE GOING TO LET ME FIND ALLEN, AND YOU ARE GOING TO LET US LEAVE PEACEFULLY. YOU ARE NOT GOING TO COMPLAIN BECAUSE IF YOU DO, I HAVE A FINE COLLECTION OF SHOVELS WITH YOUR NAME ON THEM THAT I'D BE MORE THAN HAPPY TO PUT TO USE! SO IS THERE GOING TO BE A PROBLEM HERE, CUPCAKE?!
Sokalo: *pales and shakes his head quickly*
NoName-chan: *releases him* Good. *walks inside*
Allen and Mokatty: *dancing together and having fun*
NoName-chan: *walks up to Allen and taps his shoulder* Oi, Allen, I just threatened General Sokalo's life, so we probably have about 1 minute to get out of here. We need to go.
Allen: 'Kay! *looks at Mokatty* This was fun! We should hang out again sometime! ^^
Mokatty: Totally! ^^ Bye~!
Allen: Bye~! ^^
NoName-chan and Allen: *exit the building and walk up to the others*
NoName-chan: 'Kay, let's go! *starts walking back to the NoName-chan Fanfiction Co. Building*
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki, Road: *follow*
*10 minutes later*
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki, Road: *walk back onto the stage and sit on our respective couches*
NoName-chan: Alright, let's just pick up where we left off~! Allen, spin the Wheel of Torture~!
Allen: *sighs and spins the wheel*
NoName-chan: *unfolds the paper* Alright, Allen! Your torture reads:
"Let NoName-chan ride you like a horse. If you're a good boy, she can feed you pretzels."
Allen: *gapes*
Lavi: ...Piña wrote that, didn't she?...
Pineapplebombgirl: Yup~! ^^
NoName-chan: *grins* Well, Allen?
Allen: *sighs and gets on his hands and knees*
NoName-chan: *sits on his back side saddle-style* YAH! YAH! GIDDYUP! BITCH, JUST GO!
Allen: *starts crawling around*
Kanda and Lavi: *snorting with laughter*
Road: *recording all of this*
Allen: *struggling* WHY... ARE YOU... SO HEAVY?!
NoName-chan: BITCH, YOU'RE TEN POUNDS HEAVIER THAN ME! SUCK IT UP!
Allen: *groans and collapses*
NoName-chan: *gets off of him* That was lame! NO PRETZELS FOR YOU! *sits back down* Okay, next to spin the wheel... Lenalee~!
Lenalee: *smiles and spins the wheel*
NoName-chan: *unfolds paper* Alright, Lena, your Torture reads:
"Convince Komui that you were raped and sit with him all night for his recuperation"
Lenalee: *gapes*
Lavi: Who wrote THAT? O.o
Yuno-chan: Yo~
NoName-chan: Well, Lenalee, Komui's already tied up, so have at it!
Lenalee: *sighs and walks up to Komui* Nii-san, I was raped.
Komui: *Shrieks from behind the duck tape and starts thrashing around *
NoName-chan: Well, Lenalee, prepare to release the beast after the show...
Lenalee: *gulps*
NoName-chan: Anyways, next let's have... Kanda~!
Kanda: *sighs and spins the wheel*
NoName-chan: *unfolds the paper* Okay, it reads:
"Spend 10 minutes alone with Bunny-Boy."
Kanda: WHAT?! NO WAY IN HEL-
NoName-chan: Off you go~! *quickly takes Mugen and locks Kanda and Lavi in the nearest closet*
Allen, Lenalee, Tyki: O.O;;;
Ben-kun: Who wrote that, anyways? 0.0;;;
NoName-chan: myangelicladyofdarkness. Anyways, while Kanda and Lavi do whatever they do, let's have... Road spin the wheel~!
Road: *grins and spins the wheel*
NoName-chan: *Unfolds the paper* Okay, Road! Your Torture reads:
"Restrain from glomping Allen for 10 minutes while he's shirtless and looking all sexy~ XD"
Road: *gapes* THE HORROR!
Ben-kun: Who wrote THIS one?0.0
Yuno-chan: Over here again~
NoName-chan: *grins* Sorry 'bout this! *rips off Allen's shirt and puts him in the perfect lighting*
Allen: *Looks like a sexy angel despite the Beansprout tattoos al l over his body*
99.9% of the Allen fangirl population: *DROOL*
Road: *twitching uncontrollably in her seat*
NoName-chan: *grins and starts taking photos of Allen*
*10 minutes later*
NoName-chan: Aaaaand... Time's up!
Road: *squeals and flying glomps Allen*
Allen: OOF! *gets tackled to the floor*
Ben-kun: Wait... If Road's Torture just ended, doesn't that mean that it's been over 10 minutes since you locked Kanda and Lavi in the closet?... O.o
NoName-chan: *pales* Oh shit... *runs to the closet and unlocks it*
Lavi: *bolts out and hides behind Lenalee* HELP! HE'S TRYING TO KILL ME!
Kanda: *runs out* BAKA USA-
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* BITCH, NO MURDERING LAVI! HE STILL HAS TO DO HIS TORTURE!
Allen: Is that really your only concern here?... e.e
NoName-chan: SO GO SIT DOWN!
Kanda: *mutters under his breath and sits down in his spot*
NoName-chan: Alright~! Now, let's have... Lavi~!
Lavi: *spins the wheel*
NoName-chan: *unfolds the paper* Okay, it reads:
"Wear a pink bunny suit and let me hug you~! ^.^ "
Lavi: *looks at Piña*
Pineapplebombgirl: You know me so well~! ^^ *walks onto the stage* Here! *hands Lavi a pink bunny suit*
Lavi: *sighs and puts it on over his clothes*
Pineapplebombgirl: *squeals and glomps Lavi*
NoName-chan: *snaps a picture* How cute~! ^^ Anyways, NEXT~! Tyki, you're last!
Tyki: *spins the wheel*
NoName-chan: *unfolds the paper* 'Kay, it reads:
"Deal with hyper NoName-chan."
Tyki: *pales* oh god...
Ben-kun: *grins and gives me a Diet Coke*
NoName-chan: *grins and chugs it. Goes all psycho*
Ben-kun: *throws me into the NoName-chan Cage Room and looks at Tyki* Ready?
Tyki: *siiigh* I suppose... *walks into the NoName-chan Cage Room and closes the door behind him*
NoName-chan: *bouncing off the walls* OH LORD AND HEAVEN AND THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER OF EQUESTRIA, I FOUND A PENNY AND SHOVEL! MUAHAHAHAHAHA~!
Tyki: Wha? 0.0
NoName-chan: *grabs Tyki by the shoulder and starts shaking him* MY WIFE LEFT ME, MAN! SHE LEFT ME FOR ANOTHER CAPTAIN CRUNCH BOX!
Tyki: I-I don't understand... 0.0
NoName-chan: SHE WAS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL OF THE TACOS, WITH LONG SILKY LETTUCE AND BEAUTIFUL RED TOMATOES...
Tyki: Huh? 0.0
NoName-chan: I MISS HER, MAN!
Tyki: *siiiiigh*
NoName-chan: CURSE TO UNICORNS, AND MAY BEN-KUN MARRY A CLIPBOARD!
*5 minutes of this later*
Tyki: *slams his head repeatedly on the wall* How much longer can this last?... T.T
NoName-chan: *dancing around in a hula skirt. Singing*
"SHALALALALALALALA MY OH MY
LOOK LIKE THE BOY TOO SHY
AIN'T GONNA
KISS THE SQUIRREL!"
*Holds a live squirrel in Tyki's face*
Squirrel: *spazzes out and scratches Tyki's eye*
Tyki: *clutches his eye in agony* OW!
NoName-chan: "SHALALALALALALALA AIN'T THAT SAD
AIN'T IT A SHAME? TOO BAD
HE GONNA
MISS THE SQUIRREL..."
*lets go of the squirrel, allowing it to run off*
Tyki: ARGH! I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE! GET OVER HERE, YOU PSYCHO BITCH! *lunges at me*
NoName-chan: *SHRIEK* STRANGER DANGER! *throws a bag of Doritos at Tyki's face and runs*
Tyki: *Pulls the bag off his face and continues chasing me*
*2 minutes of chasing later*
Tyki: AHA! GOT YA! *tackles me*
NoName-chan: *SHRIEK. Attempts to get away, but can't*
Tyki: *wipes sweat from his forehead in relief and continues pinning me to the floor* Well, at least now she can't hurt me or anything-
NoName-chan: *Comes out of Sugar High. Blink blink. Sees Tyki's position on top of me. SHRIEK* RAPE!
Ben-kun: *bursts into the room* I HEARD A NOISE! *sees Tyki pinning screaming me down* ... *hauntingly calm tone* Tyki... Mikk...
Tyki: *YELP* B-BEN-KUN….. THIS ISN'T WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE, I SWEAR!
Ben-kun:*starts beating Tyki with my shovel* DIE, YOU PERVERTED BASTARD!
Tyki: *SCREAM. Gets off of me and runs for his life*
NoName-chan: *sits up and rubs head* What happened...?
Ben-kun: *Continues swinging at Tyki* DIIIIEEEEEE!
Tyki: *Cries for help and keeps running*
NoName-chan: *Taps chin with finger thoughtfully* Hm…
Ben-kun: AHA! *Tackles Tyki and pins him. Raises the shovel in preparation for a fatal blow with a psychopathic grin*
Tyki: *SHRIEK*
NoName-chan: *memory clicks* OH YEAH~! I remember now! Ben-kun, it's okay! He wasn't trying to rape me!
Ben-kun: *immediately calms down* Oh, okay! ^^ *gets off Tyki and gives me back my shovel*
Tyki: *Loud sigh of relief*
NoName-chan: Now, c'mon! We've got a show to run!
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Tyki: *walk back to the stage and sit down on our respective couches*
Allen: *Looks at Tyki's terrified state* So I take it things went well?
NoName-chan: *grins* You bet your ass they did~!
Tyki: *Rocking back and forth in the corner* SQUIRRELS…. SQUIRRELS EVERYWHERE….
Allen: …..
NoName-chan: Alright, time for... AUTHORESS CHOICE~!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: *pale* Oh god...
Ben-kun and Road: *grins* Watcha got?
NoName-chan: *grins* Today, I have a three part thing for all of you~! Today's Authoress Choice was thought up by the Usagi-Twins, and it goes like this:
Today, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, and Tyki will have to dress up in maid dresses designed by the Usagi-Twins. After that, all 6 of our contestants will have to participate in a Food Fight with Cheesecake also made by the Twins. And, finally, the Twins, me, Ben-kun, and our contestants are going to do the "Jingle Bell Rock" performance from Mean Girls! ^^
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: *gape in horror*
Ben-kun, Lenalee, Road: *grin*
Tyki: *jumps in joy* I GET A NEW DRESS?! :'D
NoName-chan: Yup~! ^^ Speaking of which, Usagi-Twins, are the dresses and Cheesecake ready?
Usagi-Twins: *grin* Yup~! *Walk onto the stage pushing several large trolleys full of cheesecake*
Allen: *Mouth waters at the sight*
NoName-chan: *sees that look in Allen's eye* BITCH, NO! *hits him over the head with the shovel*
Allen: OWCHIE! T_T
NoName-chan: *grins at the Twins* So, where are the dresses?
Usagi-TwinsL *grin* Right here~! *hold up 4 maid dresses*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: *pale at the sight of them*
Tyki: *squeals happily*
Lenalee and Road: *Start laughing*
NoName-chan: Alright, guys, go change! *Shoves Allen, Kanda, Lavi, and Tyki into a random closet*
Usagi-Twins: *throw the dresses in after them and slams the door shut*
NoName-chan: *yelling through the door* You guys have 45 seconds to get dressed or I'm coming in there and dressing you myself!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: *YELP*
Tyki: Why is that a big deal? I'm already dressed~
Ben-kun: Why does that not surprise me?
NoName-chan: 30 SECONDS!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: *yelp again*
*30 seconds later*
NoName-chan: *Slams closet door open* YA DONE YET?!
Allen: Sadly….. T_T
NoName-chan: *looks at the 4 idiots and snorts with laughter* Okay, get out here right now!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *Walk back onto the stage wearing maid dresses of different colors- Allen baby blue, Lavi pink, Kanda midnight blue, and Tyki dark purple-, the skirts barely covering their junk, a ribbon around the waist tied in a big bow in the back, the string of the bow reaching the back of their knees, a white apron, striped stockings alternating the color of the dresses and white, and Mary Janes the color of the dresses*
99.9% of the Fangirl population: *NOSEBLEED*
Kanda: *desperately trying to pull the skirt of his dress down* Why the hell are these dresses so damn short?!
Usagi-Twins: BECAUSE WE DO WHAT WE WANT, MOTHERFUCKER!
Allen: *blushes* This is…
Lavi: *walking around in circles, trying to see how his ass looks in the dress* …..Interesting…
Tyki: Bitches, what're you talking about? *jumps in joy, flashing several people* THIS IS AWESOME~!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: *got flashed* OH GOD MY VIRGIN EYES MAKE IT STOP!
NoName-chan: *hits Allen, Kanda, Lavi, and Tyki over the heads with my shovel* STFU~! Now, *sits back down next to Ben on the red couch* First things first, it's time for the Cheesecake fight~! Here are the rules: You guys basically are trying to take each other out by throwing Cheesecake! If someone gets knocked unconscious, they're out~! The fight will either end when only one person is left conscious, in which they're the winner, or when you run out of Cheesecake, in which the person with the least amount of Cheesecake on their face wins~! Now, get in position~!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: *Walk to different places amongst the stage*
NoName-chan: Alright, guys~! Usagi-Twins, care to do the countdown?
Usagi-Twins: *grin* Sure~! 5…. 4…. 3…. 2…. 1! GO!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: *grab for cheesecake*
Kanda: *Stops moving to pull his skirt down again* GODDAMN THESE SHORT SKIR- *gets hit in the face with Cheesecake by Allen, the force of the impact throwing him to the ground*
Kanda Fangirls: *squeal and nosebleed upon getting flashed when Kanda falls*
Allen: *laughing evilly at the sight of Kanda getting knocked to the ground by his throw* MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA- *Gets hit in the face and knocked to the ground with Cheesecake by Lavi*
Allen Fangirls: *squeal and nosebleed upon this flashing*
Lavi: *laughing at Allen and Kanda* HAHAHAHAHA- *feels hot breath on his ear*
Tyki: *Whispering in Lavi's ear* Hey, Bunny-boy~! You look sexy in that dress…. What do say we go back to the closet and-
Lavi: *SHRIEK* PEDOPHILE! *runs for his virginit- oh wait, he isn't a virgin….. Wait, hasn't Tyki raped him before? And weren't they a temporary couple during Episode-Chapter-Thingy 1.5? Okay, I'm starting to have a hard time following Lavi's logic here….. Whatever! Point is, he's running from Tyki*
Tyki: *Chases after Lavi* NOOOOO! COME BACK, BUNNY-BOY!
Lavi: NEVAAAARRRRR! *keeps running*
Tyki: *Keeps chasing*
*2 minutes of running in circles later*
Lavi: *sobs* LEAVE ME ALONE, PEDO!
Tyki: NO! YOU'RE MINE, BUNNY-BOY-*accidentally steps on Kanda's face, slipping on the slightly melty cheesecake there, and falls on his ass* AH!
Fangirls: *Scream in horror upon this flashing*
Lavi: *laughs victoriously* HAHAHAHA- *trips over Allen*
Lavi Fangirls: *squeal and nosebleed upon this flashing*
Lenalee: *laughs at Tyki and Lavi*
Road: *throws Cheesecake at Lenalee*
Lenalee: *dodges like a pro, then slips in squished Cheesecake and falls on her face*
Tyki: *pulls himself to his feet. Sees that it's down to him and Road*
Road and Tyki: *Eyes narrow. Grab Cheesecake*
*Slow motion close up of Road and Tyki throwing the Cheesecake in their hands, the Cheescake flying through the air, and only Road getting hit*
Tyki: *laughs victoriously* HAHAHAHAHAHAHA~! I DID IT! I BEAT ROAD! NOTHING CAN STOP ME NOW! NOTHI-
Road: *flying kicks Tyki in the stomach* AKAKAKAKOW MUTHAFUCKAH~!
Tyki: OW! *doubles over in pain and collapses*
Road: *grins* NEVER doubt my ability to withstand a slice of Cheesecake to the face!
NoName-chan: *claps and grins* BRAVO~! BRAVO~! Ladies and Gentlemen, the winner of today's Cheesecake fight is- *Gets hit in the face with 4 slices of Cheesecake*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *tick marks* WHY DON'T YOU SHUT UP AND MAKE SURE WE'RE ACTUALLY UNCONSCIOUS BEFORE ANNOUNCING THE WINNER?!
NoName-chan: *silence*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *become uneasy* N-NoName-chan…..?
NoName-chan: *dark aura*
Ben-kun: *sees that look in my eye and gulps* Uh oh….. 0.0
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *look at Ben in panic* WHAT DO YOU MEAN "UH OH"?! O.O
NoName-chan: *sickly sweet smile*Oh HEEEELLLLLL no! You did NOT just throw Cheesecake at me! *holds up shovel*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *SQUEAK*
NoName-chan: DIE, MOTHERFUCKERS! *Starts beating Allen, Kanda, Lavi, and Tyki with my shovel*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *SCREAM*
Usagi-Twins, Ben-kun, Lenalee, Road: *watching the beating while eating the remaining Cheesecake*
Lenalee: So…. Are they going to be okay?
Road: *shrugs* Eh, I'm sure they'll be fine…
*5 minutes of beating and Cheesecake eating (Hey, I made a rhyme! :D) later*
NoName-chan: *stops beating the guys and smirks* I think you've learned your lesson.
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *moan in pain and shakily pull themselves to their feet*
Tyki: *looks down and gasps at the sight of his Cheesecake-covered maid dress* MY DRESSSSS! T_T
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: WHY IS THIS AN ISSUE?! o.e
Tyki: BECAUSE IT'S MY DRESS, YOU INCONSIDERATE ASSHOLES! T_T
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: *Siiiiiigh* -.-;;;
Tyki: *sobs some more*
NoName-chan: *ignores him and looks around* Wow, this place is mess….. SOMEONE CALL THE JANITORRRRR!
Ben-kun: I'm on it! *Starts yelling* JANITOOOORR-
NoName-chan: *hits Ben over the head with the shovel* BITCH, I MEANT HIT THE JANITOR SUMMONING BUTTON!
Ben-kun: Oh ^^ *walks towards the Janitor Summoning Button*
Allen: *shivers slightly* Janitor Summoning Button? That makes it sound as if we're summoning a demon to do our bidding…..
NoName-chan: That's because we are.
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: Wait, WHAT?!
NoName-chan: We're summoning a demon. Well, kind of. We're just summoning our Janitor, who happens to be one of the evilest people in the entire world. I mean, look how Ben-kun has to summon her
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *look over at Ben*
Ben-kun: *lights some skull shaped candles, carves a pentacle in the palm of his hand with a rusty dagger, and pushes the button with his blood-covered palm*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: o.e WTF?!
NoName-chan: I told you our janitor was evil. I mean, she requires a blood sacrifice in order to clean up Cheesecake. Anyways, she'll be here any second, so be sure to bow or she might eat your soul.
*lights flicker off and the door opens creakily. Everybody turns to look at the door, seeing the dark silhouette of a demon.*
Demon: *Deep raspy voice* You summoned me?
NoName-chan: Yeah, these assholes made a mess. Clean it up!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *Shaking in fear* Does she have to? 0.0
Demon: *booming footsteps as she walks in*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *SCREAM* WE'RE GONNA DIE!
Demon: I- *COUGHCOUGHCOUGH. Normal voice* Damn sinus infection! *Steps into the light*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: …Jen-chan?
Jen-chan: Yeah?
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *look at me* SHE'S THE EVIL JANITOR?
NoName-chan: Duh. She's the evilest person I know. Anyways, Jen-chan! Clean up the Cheesecake!
Jen-chan: Might as well…. *Snaps fingers*
*Dark shadowy thing appears and sucks up all the Cheesecake remains before disappearing*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: 0.0
Jen-chan: Bye *Leaves*
NoName-chan: Okay, moving on~! ^^ Now, *Grins* let's dance~
Kanda: *takes out Mugen* BRING IT ON-
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* BITCH, PUT THAT OVERSIZED TOOTHPICK AWAY! I literally meant DANCE. Ya know? It's time for us to do the Jingle Bell Rock Dance from Mean Girls!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: *pale* Oh god…..
Tyki: YAYZ~! I love that movie! ^^
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: *stare at Tyki* How are you a male…..?
NoName-chan: *Hits Allen, Kanda, and Lavi over the heads with the shovel* Doesn't matter~ TIME TO DANCE! *snaps fingers*
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Usagi-Twins, Lenalee, Road: *Suddenly wearing the slutty Santa Claus dresses from Mean Girls*
Ben-kun: *looks down. SHRIEK*
NoName-chan: C'mon, let's dance!
Kanda: Che. No way in hell.
NoName-chan: *hits Kanda over the head with the shovel* BITCH, DANCE!
Kanda: ASDFGHJKLWEIFJNEWFACIJSCIRJSEH?/!
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Usagi-Twins, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki : *Get in a line and hit sexy poses, me being the sexiest of all because I'm just fabulous like that~ XD*
*Music Plays*
NoName-chan, Ben-kun, Usagi-Twins, Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: *Start doing the dance and singing*
"Jingle-bell, jingle-bell, jingle-bell rock,
Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring.
Snowin' an blowin' up bushels of fun,
Now the jingle hop has begun.
Jingle-bell, jingle-bell, jingle-bell rock,
Jingle bells chime in jingle-bell time.
Dancin' and prancin' in Jingle Bell Square
In the frosty air"
Allen: *runs into Kanda, sending them both falling*
Kanda: *hits the Boom Box that we weren't even using but is there anyways, sending it flying*
Boom Box: *flies 15ft in the air before falling back down more harshly than Lenalee would in her Dark Boots*
Ben-kun: *gets hit in the head with the falling Boom Box and crumples to the ground, unconscious*
Allen: *gapes in horror at Ben before glaring at Kanda* GODDAMN IT, BAKANDA! LOOK WHAT YOU DID!
Kanda: WHAT I DID?! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO CRASHED INTO ME LIKE THE UNGRACEFUL SWINE YOU ARE!
NoName-chan: *knocks them both out with the shovel* BITCH, WE AIN'T DONE! Alright, play the music~! ^^
*Music resumes*
NoName-chan, Usagi-Twins, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: *resume dancing and singing*
"What a bright time, it's the right time
To rock the night away.
Jingle-bell time is a swell time
To go glidin' in a one-horse sleigh.
Giddy-yap jingle horse; pick up your feet;
Jingle around the clock.
Mix and mingle in a jinglin' beat;
That's the jingle-bell rock~!"
*Music Stops*
NoName-chan, Usagi-Twins, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: *smiles and bow*
Audience: *Applaud*
Usagi-Twins: Well, that was fun! Bye! *go back to their seats in the Audience*
NoName-chan, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: *Return to our respective couches*
Lavi: *looks at unconscious Ben, Allen, and Kanda* So…. What do we do about them?
NoName-chan: Oh, that's easy! ^^ *Grins and blasts and airhorn in Ben, Allen, and Kanda's ears*
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda: *Snap awake and jump 5ft in the air* AH!
NoName-chan: Nice of you all to join us~! ^^ NOW, GO SIT DOWN BEFORE I KNOCK YOU OUT AGAIN!
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda: *YELP. Scramble to their respective couches*
NoName-chan: Wonderful~! ^^
Lavi: So…. Now that the Authoress' Choice Round is over, is this the end of today's Episode-Chapter-Thingy?
NoName-chan: *Grins* Nope~! ^^
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *pale* WHAT?!
NoName-chan: Remember what I said after Ben-kun and I did the CaramellDansen during Episode-Chapter-Thingy? From now on, people can send suggestions relating to us, too! So, as of today, I present to you….. THE FANMAIL ROUND~!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Tyki: *sigh in relief* Oh thank god, it doesn't relate to us…..
NoName-chan: Don't be so sure about that~! Now *Jar filled with slips of paper appears in my hands* Let's begin~! ^^ Okay, because I'm fabulous and sexy and Ben-kun is a guy in a dress, we'll start with me~! *Pulls a slip of paper form the jar* Today's first Fanmail reads:
"NoName-chan,
Yay! You, Road, Lenalee, and I agree on pairings!
~myangelicladyofdarkness"
Lavi: Whaaa? O.o
NoName-chan: She's referring to the pairings we discussed during Episode-Chapter-Thingy 2. If you don't remember what they are, go watch-read it again~ MOVING ON~! *pulls another slip out of the jar* This one reads:
"NoName-chan,
Can you ask Allen if I can have the shirt she was wearing during Chapter 3 of "Carnival"?
~myangelicladyofdarkness"
Kanda: *SNORT* DID SHE JUST CALL ALLEN A "SHE"? BAHAHAHAHA-
NoName-chan: Allen's a girl.
Ben-kun, Allen, Kanda, Lenalee, Tyki: *Freeze* …W-WHAT?!
Kanda: *Looks at Allen* HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL US THIS?!
Allen: *facepalm* Kanda, you've fucked me multiple times on this show. You KNOW I'm a guy! What you SHOULD be asking is what the hell NoName-chan is talking about!
NoName-chan: Oh, that's easy. Allen's a girl in my other fanfiction, "Carnival."
Allen: O.O WHY WAS I NOT AWARE OF THIS?!
NoName-chan: Because SHUT UP~! Anyways, the shirt myangelicladyofdarkness is talking about was worn by Fem!Allen during Chapter 3 of Carnival. Which, of course, mean that we're gonna need to ask her. FEM!ALLEN!
Fem!Allen: *walks in* What the hell do you want?
Allen: OHHOLYSHITWHATTHEFUCKERMEHGERDHOWISTHATEVENPOSSIBL EOHMYGOD
Fem!Allen: *Glares at Allen* Shut up, Male Me. Anyways, what do you want, NoName-chan?
NoName-chan: myangelicladyofdarkness wants to know if she can have the T-Shirt you were wearing for Chapter 3 of Carnival.
Fem!Allen: What? This one? *holds up a large black T-shirt with a creepy picture of Alice from Alice in Wonderland grinning with a knife in her hand surrounded by white roses with splotches of red dripping from them with the words "Let's paint the roses red with blood" in red under it*
NoName-chan: Yeah, that one. Can she have it?
Fem!Allen: Yeah, sure. Here ya go! *throws the shirt to myangelicladyofdarkness*
Myangelicladyofdarkness: *Catches it and grins* Sweet!
Fem!Allen: Now, if that's all, I'm leaving. Bye, fuckers! *Walks out like a badass*
Lavi: *Shivers* Why am in love with her in Carnival…..?
Road: BECAUSE SHE'S AWESOME!
Allen: *still trying to figure out how this is possible*
NoName-chan: Moving on~! *pulls another slip of paper from the jar* This one reads:
"NONAME-CHAN!
HOW THE HELL COULD YOU SING PONPONPON WITHOUT ME?! THAT'S IT! WE'RE SINGING IT AGAIN!
~Yuno-chan"
Kanda: Wha-
NoName-chan: When you guys had amnesia and we went to Applebee's during Episode-Chapter-Thingy 1.5, Ben-kun and I sang karaoke to the song "PONPONPON." Well, you see, Yuno-chan is the one who introduced me to that song. Her and I always sing it together in Geometry class at school. So she's pissed that I sang it without her. In other words, this means that if I don't sing it with her now, she's going to break into my house through my window tonight and murder me in the slowest, most painful way she can think of.
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: O_O
NoName-chan: *siiigh* Yuno-chan, get up here! Let's just get this over with!
Yuno-chan: *Skips onto the stage with a huge grin and glomps me* Aishiteru Haha!
NoName-chan: *rolls eyes* Whatever *snaps fingers*
NoName-chan and Yuno-chan: *suddenly dressed like Kyary Pamyu Pamyu in the PONPONPON music video*
Ben-kun: *suddenly dressed like the dancing fat lady in the background* 0.0 AGAIN?!
NoName-chan: YES! Now, HIT THE MUSIC~!
*Music Begins*
Ben-kun: *Starts doing his fat lady dancing*
NoName-chan, Yuno-chan: *Start singing*
"Ano kousaten de minna ga moshi SUKIPPU wo shite
moshi ano machi no mannaka de te wo tsunaide
sora wo miagetara moshi mo ano
machi no dokoka de CHANSU ga tsuka mitai no nara
mada naku no niwa hayai yo ne tada mae ni
susumu shikanai wa iya iya"
*start doing the dance*
"PON PON dashite shimaeba ii no
zenzen shinai no tsumaranai desho
HEADPHONE kakete RIZUMU ni nosete
WEI WEI akete atashi no michi wo
PON PON susumu iroiro na koto
dondon kiiteru anata no kimochi
poipoi suteru warui ko wa dare
sou sou ii ko ARE YOU MAKE ME HAPPY
EVERY DAY PON
EVERY TIME IS PON
MERRY-GO-ROUND noritai no
EVERY DAY PON
EVERY TIME IS PON
tabun sonna ja dame desho
PON PON dashite shimaeba ii no
zenzen shinai no tsumaranai desho
HEADPHONE kakete RIZUMU ni nosete
WEI WEI akete atashi no michi wo
PON PON WEI WEI WEI
PON PON WEI PON WEI PON PON
WEI WEI PON PON PON
WEI WEI PON WEI PON WEI WEI
PON PON WEI WEI WEI
PON PON WEI PON WEI PON PON
WEI WEI PON PON PON
WEI WEI PON WEI PON WEI WEI
ano kousaten de minna ga moshi SUKIPPU wo shite
moshi ano machi no mannaka de te wo tsunaide
sora wo miagetara moshi mo ano
machi no dokoka de CHANSU ga tsuka mitai no nara
mada naku no niwa hayai yo ne tada mae ni
susumu shikanai wa iya iya
PON PON susumu iroiro na koto
dondon kiiteru anata no kimochi
poipoi suteru warui ko wa dare
sou sou ii ko ARE YOU MAKE ME HAPPY
EVERY DAY PON
EVERY TIME IS PON
MERRY-GO-ROUND noritai no
EVERY DAY PON
EVERY TIME IS PON
tabun sonna ja dame desho
PON PON WEI WEI WEI
PON PON WEI PON WEI PON PON
WEI WEI PON PON PON
WEI WEI PON WEI PON WEI WEI
PON PON WEI WEI WEI
PON PON WEI PON WEI PON PON
WEI WEI PON PON PON
WEI WEI PON WEI PON WEI WEI
PON PON WEI WEI WEI
PON PON WEI PON WEI PON PON
WEI WEI PON PON PON
WEI WEI PON WEI PON WEI WEI
PON PON WEI WEI WEI
PON PON WEI PON WEI PON PON
WEI WEI PON PON PON
WEI WEI PON WEI PON WEI WEI"
*music ends*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki, Audience: *smile and applaud*
NoName-chan, Yuno-chan, Ben-kun: *grin and bow*
NoName-chan: Alright *snaps fingers*
NoName-chan, Yuno-chan, Ben-kun: *dressed normally again*
NoName-chan: Moving on~! YUNO! GO SIT DOWN!
Yuno-chan: NO! :P
NoName-chan: Suit yourself~ *pushes Yuno off the stage*
Yuno-chan: ASDFGHJKLASKFNAVEITVNCODDDXLYFM4?/! BITCH DIE!
NoName-chan: MOVING ON~! *pulls another slip from the jar* This is the last one for me today! It reads:
"Hey, NoName-chan!
So during the Tyki fashion show of Episode-Chapter-Thingy 2, I found out that Lenalee liked the rain boots and miniskirt I designed. So, I figured I'd give her them! ^^
~Pineapplebombgirl"
Lenalee: *SQUEAL*
Pineapplebombgirl: *Walks onto the stage and gives Lenalee the miniskirt and pair of rainboots* Here you go~! ^^
Lenalee: *glomps Piña* THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU~!
Pineapplebombgirl: Heehee no problem~! ^^ *Goes back to her seat in the audience*
Lenalee: *sits back down on the blue couch, hugging her newly owned boots and skirt*
NoName-chan: *smiles* Nothing makes me happier than to see fangirls getting along with contestants and each other~! Anyways, time for Ben-kun's Fanmail~! *Pulls slip out of the jar*This one reads:
"DIE, BEN-KUN, DIE!
Tee hee, just kidding! It's just that NoName-chan said not to say that, so I couldn't help myself! ^^
~Pineapplebombgirl"
Ben-kun: Tee hee, it's okay, Piña! NoName-chan tells me not to be a dumbass all the time, but that doesn't stop me! ^^
NoName-chan: No shit, really? -.- Anyways, that concludes today's Fanmail Round~! ^^
Ben-kun: Wait, what? But I only had one Fanmail… o.o
NoName-chan: And?
Ben-kun: You had four... O.o
NoName-chan: Do you actually have a point here, or can I just tune you out?
Ben-kun: How come you have so much more Fanmail than me? O.O
NoName-chan: Because I'm fucking awesome, that's why!
Ben-kun: *tick mark* But that's not fair! I'm just as cool as you!
NoName-chan: *eyes narrow* Bitch ass nigga, you challenging me?
Ben-kun: *triumphant smirk* YEAH! I AM!
NoName-chan: *grins* Alright. Just know that you brought this on yourself.
Allen: Wait, what's happening here? O.O
Road: *grins and starts eating popcorn* I think our Hosts are about to fight~
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: WHAT?! O.O
NoName-chan: Alright, Ben-kun. What's your choice of weapon?
Ben-kun: *grins. Suddenly dressed like Sebastion from Kuroshitsuji* My powers as a demon butler.
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: *Heads snap towards Road* SINCE WHEN IS HE A DEMON BUTLER?! O.O
Road: Since always. *pops another piece of popcorn in her mouth*
Ben-kun: *smirks* And you?
NoName-chan: *Grins. Suddenly dressed like Road. Skin turns gray. Eyes turn golden. The row of cross-shaped scars appears on my forehead. Floating pointy candles surround me.* My powers as the Noah of Sadism.
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Tyki: SINCE WHEN IS SHE A NOAH?! O.O
Road: JUST WATCH THE GODDAMN FIGHT!
Ben-kun: *smirks awesomely* BRING IT ON.
NoName-chan: *psycho grin. Pointed ends of the candles snap towards Ben*
Lenalee: OH MY FUCKING GOD COMMERCIAL BREAK! O.O
Random Camera Guy: I'm on it, pretty lady~!
*COMMERCIAL SEQUENCE BEGIN*
"NEW MAID DRESSES~!" *Tyki orders*
"POINTY CANDLES~!" *NoName-chan and Road order*
"POINTY CANDLE WOUND HEALER~!" *Ben-kun orders*
"EVEN MORE SHOVELS~!" *NoName-chan orders*
*COMMERCIAL SEQUENCE END*
*We return to our set once again. Ben is curled up on the red couch, shaking in trauma and covered in bandages, the outcome of the fight obvious. All of our contestants are sitting on the blue couch, Road finishing her popcorn, and the rest staring wide eyed at Ben and me. I'm sitting nonchalantly next to Ben, staring at my phone with a perplexed expression on my face.*
Road: *Finally finishes her popcorn and throws the empty popcorn bag behind her, somehow managing to hit Tyki in the face with it even though he's sitting next to her. Grins* Welcome back~! While we were on Commercial Break, NoName-chan and Ben-kun fought it out for 30 seconds before Ben-kun gave up and begged for mercy. In compensation for his actions against her, Ben-kun has agreed to be NoName-chan's loyal servant for the rest of his life.
Allen: Isn't he pretty much her servant, anyway?...
Road: ANYWAYS, now, I turn you over to NoName-chan~! *dramatically gestures to me*
NoName-chan: *continues staring perplexedly at my phone in silence*
Road: ….NoName-chan?
NoName-chan: *murmurs softly* I just don't get it…
Kanda: *Realizes that I'm reading a Fanfiction* OH GOD…
Allen: What don't you get, NoName-chan- OW!
Kanda: *just bitch slapped Allen* BAKA MOYASHI! SHE'S READING FANFICTION!
Allen, Lavi, Tyki: *Pale* Oh god….. 0.0
Lenalee and Road: *Grin* What don't you get, NoName-chan?
NoName-chan: I don't get how people read Lucky Smut so easily! I mean-
Allen and Kanda: OH GOD MY VIRGIN EARS MAKE IT STOP!
Lavi and Tyki: … Continue.
Allen and Kanda: *give Lavi and Tyki a "WTF?!" stare*
NoName-chan: Like, I'm always expecting something horrible to happen! Like,
"Tyki stared down at Lavi. The golden eyed man couldn't help but smirk at how adorable his little bunny looked blushing like that. It was pure beauty.
"You like me now, Bunny-Boy?" he purred in Lavi's ear, though the answer to his question was obvious.
"O-Oh, Tyki," the redhead panted, "that was amazing!" The blush on Lavi's face darkened to a new hue as he gulped and stuttered, "T-Tyki, I l-love yo-"
Tyki then sunk his teeth into Lavi's neck, ripping out his throat and ending the redhead's life. Spitting out the blood soaked flesh, Tyki smirked once more.
"Love you, too, Bunny-Boy," was all he said before proceeding to devour Lavi's corpse."
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee, Road, Tyki: *moment of silence*
Road: *Snorts with laughter*
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee: WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM?! O.O
NoName-chan: Lots of things.
Tyki: My question is why the hell she thinks I'd kill Lavi and eat his corpse after our first time! I mean, seriously! At least save that for the fourth time!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi, Lenalee: O.O
Lavi: *faceplants on the coffee table* It's official: I'm never dating Tyki.
Allen and Kanda: You weren't going to do that anyway….. o.O
NoName-chan: Lavi, you worry too much! I wouldn't let Tyki ACTUALLY get cannibalistic!
Lavi: *looks up at me hopefully* R-really? T-thank yo-
NoName-chan: Cannibalism is bad for ratings!
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: *sigh* Of course…..
NoName-chan: Plus, Piña would be devastated! And there's nothing I hate more than to see my lovely fangirls unhappy!
Yuno-chan: YOU SHOVED ME OFF THE STA-
NoName-chan: NOTHING! Anyways, *grins at the audience* with that point made, this concludes Episode-Chapter-Thingy 3 of DGS~! Thank you all for your wonderful support! Please continue to send in Suggestions, 'cause it really helps! Also, I'm going to be running a poll (possibly two) on my profile relating to the next Episode-Chapter-Thingy! PLEEEEAAASSSSEEEEE vote! I'll probably not be running it for very long, because I want to have the next Episode-Chapter-Thingy up ASAP! Anyways, with that, we're done~! SEE YA NEXT TIME~!
Director: AAAAANNNNDDDDD… Cut!
Camera Guys #s 2-12: *turn off their cameras*
Camera Guy #1: *too busy eating a doughnut and forgets to turn off his camera*
Audience: *leaves*
NoName-chan: *not aware that the show is still rolling* Well, guys! Time to go~! BEN-KUN! STOP MOPING! I DIDN'T STAB YOU THAT BADLY! WE GOTTA GO! Piña, come help me get him home!
Pineapplebombgirl: Sure thing!
NoName-chan, Pineapplebombgirl: *drag Ben out of the DGS Stage Room*
Road: *Looks at Yuno and grins* Wanna play Real Life Happy Wheels with me?
Yuno-chan: *grins* Sure~!
Yuno-chan, Road: *link arms and skip out of the stage room*
Allen: *Looks at Lucy* Well, we have a date to attend to!
Lucy Moon-Walker: *squeals in joy*
Lucy Moon-Walker and Allen: *walk out of the stage room together*
Tyki: *looks at Lavi and grins* Hey, Bunny-Boy, -
Lavi: NOPE! *sprints out of the stage room*
Tyki: HEY, WAIT FOR MEEEEEEE! *chases after Lavi*
Kanda: *looks at Lenalee* ...Wanna hang out?
Lenalee: *shrugs* Might as well.
Kanda and Lenalee: *walk out of the stage room, turning off the lights on the way out*
Kanda: …..Hey, aren't we forgetting something?
Lenalee: NOPE.
Komui: *still tied to the chair on the stage, screaming from behind his gag*
…
EXTRA: "Allen and Lucy's Date"
Allen: *smoothes down his hair* Hey, Lucy, ready to go?
Lucy: *Walks out, looking all beautiful* Yup~! ^^
*One joyous date later*
Lucy and Allen: *walking on the sidewalk, laughing about something. Reach Lucy's front door*
Allen: *blushes* This was fun! We should definitely do it again sometime! ^^
Lucy: *smiles and blushes* Definitely! ^^
Allen and Lucy: *lean in for a kiss*
Yuno-chan: *Pops out of fucking nowhere between them* I THINK NOT!
Allen: OHJESUSCHRISTWHATTHEFUCKHOWDIDYOUGETTHEREERMEHGERD
Lucy: *tick mark* BACK OFF, BITCH, HE'S MINE!
Yuno-chan: LIKE HELL HE IS! *takes out axe*
Lucy: *takes out monkey stick*
NoName-chan: *jumps down from fucking nowhere and lands between them*
Allen: WHERE THE HELL DO YOU PEOPLE KEEP COMING FROM?! O.O
NoName-chan: *sprays Lucy and Yuno in the faces with my Fangirl Spray Bottle* NO! NO! STOP IT! FANGIRL FIGHTS ARE BAD FOR RATINGS!
Lucy and Yuno-chan: YOU LITTLE- *lunge at me*
NoName-chan: Bye~ ^^ *disappears in a puff of smoke*
Lucy and Yuno-chan: *smack into each other* OOF-!
Yuno-chan: *tick mark* Look, I don't like you, and you don't like me, but….
Lucy: *tick mark* ….I think we can put our differences aside for a common goal: KILIING NONAME-CHAN!
Lucy and Yuno-chan: Agreed. *Shake hands*
Yuno-chan: Plus, there's two of us and seven days a week. There's plenty of Allen to go around~ ;3
Lucy: *grins* Indeed. Shall we?
Yuno-chan: *grins* Yes.
Lucy and Yuno-chan: *hold up their weapons of choice* LET'S GO FIND NONAME-CHAN! *start to walk away before stopping and turning around one last time* BYE, ALLEN-KUN~! *each kiss one of Allen's cheeks before running away again*
Allen: o.e