The house was finally silent. Emma drew in a deep breath and leaned against the sink, looking out to the dark night sky from the window. Rain, the soft lull of rain was the only sound, the occasional rumble of thunder came too. No more coughing or whimpering, whining, no more puke bowls or boxes of tissues. Three children now all sleeping in bed with broken fevers. Silent.
Too silent.
Normally, after their children were in bed, he would sneak down the stairs and up behind her as she always took a few moments before bed to stare out the window and over the calm waters their home overlooked to reflect on the day. He would slowly run his hand up her side and over her back, massaging the tension from the day away and would lightly kiss the back of her neck. He would whisper words of love and joy into her ear as he wrapped his now end-of-the-day hookless arm around her waist. But he, her Killian wasn't here. No fault of his own of course. If anyone would be to blame it would be her parents. It had been over a week and a half since he had been home. The good and honourable Captain Jones had been commissioned by the King and Queen to sail away on a mission. One that was only supposed to last a few nights and now the nights without him continued to pile up. The more nights he was away the more she realised she didn't want to do this without him. The more nights he was away their children began to ask more and more questions about when he was returning. Where was Papa? Emma had been hearing it several times a day now.
Each time she began to let the question sink deeper and plant the seeds of doubt. Each time she began to question even her own optimistic answer.
Thunder shook the house and jolted her from her gaze. The rain began pelting harder, white sheets waved down the window before her.
Emma ran her hand through her hair and began the slow task of closing up shop. Put away dishes and tided up, curtains closed, lights off, doors locked. Eventually, as the obnoxious grandfather clock from Gold' shop that Killian and Henry loved so much struck midnight, she made her way to the front door, the final thing to lock up before sinking into her empty, cold bed.
She locked the door, saw the bright flash of lightning coming through the windows and turned to go upstairs.
"Holy crap!"
There sitting on the stairs and staring at the front door curled up in his favorite blanket and holding his stuffed duck was Liam. The flashes of lightning lit up his watery eyes, making them glow against the dark.
"God! Liam…" Emma stepped forward towards her son.
He looked up at her and a small tear ran down his cheek. She gently reached forward and brushed away the tear and kissed his forehead.
"Let's go to bed, kiddo."
He shook his head. "No, Mama. I'm waiting."
Emma sighed and sat beside him on the stairs.
"Waiting for what, kid?"
Liam squeezed his toy and shoved his face into the yellow plush. "I'm waiting for Papa."
"Oh, Liam. He isn't coming back tonight. Remember what I said? Grandma and Grandpa said they would send a message when his ship comes in. And we didn't get a message in today."
"Maybe he wants to surprise us?" Hope and optimism seep through his words. The innocence of a six year old child shone through.
Unfortunately the wisdom and jadedness of an adult overruled.
"Your father is not coming in tonight, Liam."
A bolt of lightning and a sharp crack of thunder shook the house and Liam shuddered and whimpered.
"But he promised! And Papa never breaks his promise. He said it's not good to break promises," Liam whimpered, anger began to seep through his words. He tore his eyes from the door and looked at her. His blue eyes the same as his fathers, bright and intense. Their children, in her eyes, each had a unique blend of the two of them but Liam…Liam was his father's son and the young boy knew it. He always had a special connection with his father from day one. It was something Killian always denied. He loved all their children the same but there was always an unspoken bond between those two.
"Liam-," she started but the clap of thunder sounded again and the boy curled up on himself again.
"Papa isn't here. He's always been here when it storms and he always chases the thunder away but he isn't here and I'm scared."
Oh…Emma ran her hand through her hair and let out a long breath. Another clap and another whimper from Liam. How this slipped her mind she had no idea. Zarek, and even Liam's twin sister Mia never reacted to the storms but Liam…storms and Liam was something that Killian had always taken care of. Ever since that first storm a few years ago Liam always would run to his papa, always his papa. Whenever he slipped into their bedroom Liam always headed to her husband's side, she always in turn slipped out of the room and padded down the hall to check on the others. By the time she returned, Killian had always had the boy asleep and calmed. She never asked what he said or done but just kissed them both and went to sleep.
Now Emma wished she had asked Killian what he had happened. Now she had a crying boy waiting on the stairs for the one person to come through the door who could soothe him. Now she felt hopeless and at a loss of what to do to help. She had never been scared of storms, she had always loved the storms. They hid the sounds of banging and clanging, of yelling and crying and screaming of other children.
"Papa," Liam whispered and snuggled his toy closer.
Slowly, carefully she wrapped her arm around her son and pulled him tight to her side. He was rigid at first, fists clenched around his blanket and duck and tightened with every clap of thunder but after a few moments Emma felt tension slowly seep from Liam. This was what she could offer. Killian would have used his silvered tongue to calm Liam down. He spun tales to make them laugh away their fears and always spoke his heart felt words of love and concern. Words never came easily to her as they did with Killian and that fact hadn't changed with her children. They knew that she expressed her concern and her love for them through her hugs and small smiles and it comforted her to know that her children seemed to understand this unspoken connection she had. In moments like this it seemed it was all she had but it seemed to always be enough.
"He'll come home right? I miss him."
Emma placed a kiss on his soft dark hair and rested her head against his head. A hand soothingly rubbed at his back. "Your father has gone to the ends of the earth for our family and nothing will stop him from coming home. We just have to wait a bit longer." She paused and gently shifted him into her lap and picked up him. They climbed the stairs and made their way to his bed. Liam made no sound as Emma placed him in bed, not a peep as she tucked him in and placed his duck next to him again. Zarek snuffled in his sleep across the room but otherwise remained still, unaffected by the storm and still drained from the flu.
"I miss him, Mama." Tears formed once again in the corners of his eyes.
"I miss him too, kid. And he misses us too." She wiped at the tears. "Now no more of these or you might just make the water level rise and keep Papa away longer."
Liam squinted his eyes, wiped them away and tried for a weak smile.
"Thanks Mama. I love you."
Her heart pulled at those words. Never. She would never get used to hearing those words.
"Love you too Liam. And your Papa loves you too. You and Zarek and Mia and Henry. We love you all so much."
This seemed to placate the child and he slowly closed his eyes and snuggled his duck closer. The rain slowed and the thunder stopped as Liam fell back into the land of dreams. Emma ran her hand lightly down his face and brushed away the final tear from his soft face, through his dark brown hair which was just as ruffled and uncontrollable as usual and down to rub at his shoulders again, fixing his blankets and then crept backwards from the boy's room. As quietly as she could Emma closed the door then rested her head against the cool white door.
"I've gone not only to the ends of the worlds love, but time too. Why must I keep reminding you of this fact?"
Emma didn't jump this time. She clutched the handle of the door and then curled her hand up against the wood, refusing to turn around. Her chest tightened and the tears she had stopped from her son threatened to pour out from her.
"Emma, love."
She shook her head as the sound of his voice came in a whisper again. He wasn't real, he couldn't be but she could not deny the truth when a warm solid arm wrapped around her waist. His forehead rested against her shoulder and she could feel the gentle kiss he laid on her and the smell of salt water that always followed him seep into her.
"I love you, Swan."
Emma tore from his grasp and turned around. He was there in the hallway. Standing right before her. He was alive. Clothing was a bit dirty and askew, his hair was wild and a bit wet from the rain and sea but his eyes were as blue and shining as ever. He smiled and wiggled his brows in attempt to break her stupor.
She punched his shoulder.
"Don't you ever do that again to me, mister," she hissed and pointed at him.
He rubbed at his shoulder but smiled wider. "Never. I couldn't bear it." Killian stepped closer and pulled her in tight. Emma's arms found their way past his leather jacket and to his solid back, running her hands over him as comfort for him and reassurance for her that her pirate came back to her safe and unscathed.
"Gods above I miss you so much, Emma. Every night I didn't know what to do with myself. I couldn't be without you"
"Oh I don't know about that, you seem pretty ship shape to me, Captain."
He groaned and pushed his lips against hers. Every moment apart and the longing they created he put into the kiss. She met him with her own. Equal as always.
She pulled away first but quickly rested her head against his chest. The strong heart beat that relaxed her every night just there beneath her ear.
"I love you, Killian."
"I love you, Emma."
Hello! Sorry for the long break but I've fallen into a phase of How to Train Your Dragon with the release of the movie (LOVE LOVE LOVE) and rewatched FMA Brotherhood so have been lacking inspiration for Once but I'm hauling myself back onto this horse and working on this and Welcome. Again, thanks to everyone who has reviewed and read this and any of my other OUAT shots. So please feel free to review and give me a bit more of a kick in the butt and thanks again for reading.