CHAPTER 7: NEXT STEP

If I had known how Peeta would really turn out, I would have acted differently in the beginning. No yelling, no snide remarks. But I guess I was being given another chance because still unbelievably he liked me. I knew we would have to discuss the court case again and delve deeper into the issues at hand. But it wasn't as scary a thought as it used to be.

These thoughts are running through my brain as I stumble down the stairs the next morning. I don't even care I'm walking around the house half asleep, wearing tiny pajama shorts and a singlet with no bra and my hair still knotted. No, after a few weeks living here it was clear none of us were conservative. How many times had I walked into the bathroom or kitchen and found a sleepy and shirtless Finn or Peeta?

I literally fall over the doorframe and into the kitchen. I hear one of the boys laugh and the other one is speaking.

"Here she is." I get handed the telephone and I squint and see Finnick. "Answer it." He whispers.

I sigh and put it to my ear. I knew it was Haymitch. Why the fuck was he calling me in the morning again? I look up at the clock and find that it reads 11:30. Oh, seriously?

"Hold on." I order into the telephone. "Why aren't you two in class?" I ask Finnick and Peeta angrily.

They give each other a mock scared look which I return with a glare. "Day off today Kat."

I turn my back to their laughing. "What do you want?" I ask Haymitch.

"I asked you to call me." He reminds me sternly. I think of the sticky note attached to the letters he mailed me.

"When I was ready."

"Well, are you?" He demands.

I sigh, raking a hand through my hair. "Whatever. What's happening over there?"

I pace the kitchen and see Finn reading the newspaper and Peeta cooking breakfast as I listen to Haymitch. "Your mother is doing okay."

"Where's she living?"

"My house, Prim moved back in." Never in my life would I understand his compassion for my mother. After all she was only his sister in law. And it didn't really count when she was widowed. He could have discarded her. He should have.

"And you really think the best care for her is a drunken uncle and Primrose?" I question spitefully.

Instead of taking offence he merely laughs. "I have a caretaker here."

"Course you do." Peeta begins to dish up breakfast and I see scrambled eggs. Yum, I mumble to myself absentmindedly. He sees me staring and offers me one plate.

Thanks, I mouth.

"I'm coming back Haymitch." The minute I say it Finn stiffens and looks at me. No! He mouths making frantic gestures.

"Finn be quiet!" I whisper-yell.

"Oh is that your plan?" He asks sarcastically. "And how are you going to do your classes? Or your work at the firm?" I felt like I was five again, being lectured.

"Well-"

"I'll make you a deal." He cuts me off. "Because I know Gale has talked about this too. If in six weeks you still think the same I'll buy you a ticket in your week break. Then you can come. You can do whatever you think you are entitled to do and you can see your mother. But for now it's in everybody's best interest that you stay where you are."

I groan loudly at my barstool where I'm stuffing eggs into my mouth. Why was everyone against me? I hang up the phone without saying goodbye well aware of the immaturity of the action but also knowing Haymitch knows he got his way.

"You're so sunny in the morning Katniss." Finn tells me in a fake cheerful voice, a huge smile on his face. The comment causes Peeta to laugh and I glare at both of them before turning back to the eggs. Like usual they were incredible as was anything cooked by Peeta.

My mind wanders to District 12. Haymitch was giving everything he had for both me and Prim. Particularly Prim because he was saving my mother. Honestly I was pretty sure that mine and his opinion of my mother was parallel. But it was Prim who cared so much that influenced his decisions. Maybe all this drama took the focus of his own miserable life.

Over the years I had gradually learned the truths about my Uncle and why he always had a liquor stash and almost always slept past noon. Truths that my father and others had tried hard to hide from innocent minds. A long, long, time ago when my father was still alive Haymitch had had a wife. Her name was Maysilee. They were married for four years before she died of cancer. Apparently it was horrific, that it happened in a matter of weeks of her being diagnosed. He lost everything that day. This was why when dad would take us to see his older brother, Haymitch would always seem slightly detached, bitter, no matter how hard he tried to cover it. I found out not long ago that my father had helped him through a great deal and pushed him into counseling. He was his tether. Then of course my father died in the accident and all was lost for Haymitch. That's when the drinking became heavy and the house a broken mess. It was probably a year after that when he finally came to his senses he realized that his two nieces were fending for themselves while their catatonic mother lay in her bed. The reason why he took Prim and me in and admitted to my mother to the Institution always boggled me but I suppose it was his last link to his brother. The last of his family. While he still drank he was forced to remain mostly coherent. As the years went on he reentered the property market, something he hadn't done since Maysilee died, and began to earn his millions. Even though to this day he has always paid for Prim in her tuition and other expenses but I have always refused. I didn't want charity.

I must have been thinking for a really long time because when I look up Finn and I are alone in the kitchen and he is on the last page of the newspaper.

"You came back to the land of the living?" He asks without even looking up.

I smile but ignore him. A small grin creeps onto his face. I wished everyone knew the Finn I did. And not the one that brought home girls every weekend.

The floor creaks and Johanna enters chatting on her mobile to who I can tell is Thresh. Johanna never used a term of endearment that wasn't insulting unless speaking to him.

"…she cute?" I roll my eyes with Finnick at Johanna's antics within other people's relationships. "Yeah…uh huh….no everything's fine. Thresh there's no problem she's just being Katniss."

I sit up a little straighter. Was this about the mail again? Finnick glances carefully at me.

"Okay…okay, bye honey." Johanna sets down the phone and helps herself to breakfast left by Peeta. I watch her knowing I was about to receive an attack. I nearly laugh when she turns around to prove I am right.

"What is wrong with you Katniss? Are you completely socially inept?"

"What?" I ask confused. "Is this about the mail?"

"No it's not about the mail although that is a very good point! Thresh is completely suspicious. What do you think you are doing with Gale?"

I squint at her. "The usual?" I cringe slightly at my choice of words. Jesus, this was fucked up.

"Katniss you have to stop this. You have a guy completely crazy for you and you go and start it again with Gale. It was fine for a while but-"

"Wait, what? What did you say?"

"Are you seriously that daft?" I can see Finnick cover his face as he laughs. I slap him. "Can you not see that Peeta is into you?"

I stare at her shocked. "I…"

"What are you doing with Gale? You're not prepared to date him. Give him up."

"Jo I can't do that." I say.

"Why?"

"He's my best friend. And he loves me."

"But you don't love him. Not that way." When I still looked unconvinced she rants again. "You are capable of having guy friends who you don't sleep with! Look at Finn! He's a freaking god and you live with him but have you ever done anything?"

"Well maybe once…" Finn mutters grinning. Johanna hits him and he protests at being the female's punching bag. But he's still grinning and I know he's thinking back to the first year we met. He had in fact tried to put his moves on me. I had very adeptly punched him in the face.

"My point is, don't scare off someone by using Gale."

"I'm not doing that-" I argue.

"You like him. Peeta. I can tell. It's in your weird Katniss sort of way but you do."

I grit my teeth. "I don't." I say vehemently.

She sighs, thinking she's won. "You keep telling yourself that."

I storm out shortly after she wanders out, leaving a laughing Finn alone in the kitchen.

000

As much as I try I cannot get Johanna's words out of my head all day. Not when I'm sitting with Cato in a class, or I'm texting Prim in my bedroom or even when I jog along the beach with Finn. I'm mad at her now. She was the reason my mind was in turmoil.

So it didn't help when Gale came to pick me up for our last night together and I still hadn't resolved my thoughts. He takes me to part of the Strip where one of the island bars sit. I guess we're drinking tonight.

"What's on your mind Catnip?"

"Nothing." I mutter forcing a smile. I sip the drink Gale ordered me. "So you're going back home tomorrow, huh?"

"I'm gonna miss you."

"I'll be there in a few weeks." I brush it off, becoming uncomfortable with his sentiments.

"Still." He grabs my hand and I know what he is expecting.

I sigh as Johanna's voice replays in my head. I wasn't sure whether she was right and this thing I had with Gale was ruining my social life or whether I'd be lost and lonely without it.

"Something's bothering you." He states, his eyes penetrating mine.

"Really Gale, I'm fine." I say, squeezing his hand. I down the rest of my drink and Gale holds up two fingers, signaling to the bartender for more.

We chat simply for a while as the alcohol slowly infiltrates my veins. On my seventh drink I don't protest when Gale pulls me to dance. We join the others moving to the music in the sand.

His hands grab my hips and my arms snake his neck. It takes a few minutes in my drunken state to realize I probably shouldn't be doing this. But soon the music invades my mind wiping out all ideas and I lean closer as we continue to dance. When his hands start moving downwards I stop.

He raises an eyebrow. "More drinks." I attempt to cover my abruptness.

I stumble my way over to the bar with Gale keeping a firm grip on my waist. He was not nearly as drunk as me. This time I order.

"Two tequila shots!" I announce happily, feeling like I need something with a little more punch. Gale appraises me for a moment before nodding at the bartender.

I down the liquid, appreciating the heat that flows through my chest. I smile up at Gale and lean against him, unbalanced.

"I think you're done Catnip." He smirks.

"Me? No way!" I slur.

"Let's sit down for a while." I can tell by the glaze in his eyes that while he's not as far gone as me, he's still quite drunk.

We stumble closer to the shore and sit down in the sand. Gale's arm wraps around my shoulders. For a few peaceful moments we watch the waves roll in, black against the night sky. The moon illuminates the water casting shadows across the ocean.

"Katniss…"

I turn my head and his lips find mine. With Johanna's concern pushed far back in my mind my mouth moves with his. I press harder as his hands wrap in my hair, pulling me to him. Heat surges through my veins and I deepen the kiss, becoming entwined in his body.

He pulls away from my lips, kissing down my neck and I breathe out a sigh of pleasure. "I love you Kat." He whispers into my skin.

The words trigger something. I come to my senses as best I can in the haze.

"Gale…"I mutter, pulling away.

His arms tighten stopping me. "Come on Katniss-"

And then I say it. "We shouldn't do this anymore." If I had been a little more coherent I might have broken it to him easier.

"What?"

I suck in a breath trying to rid my arousal and the need to pull his face back to mine. "We're not together. We never were. This is wrong."

He looks confused. "We can be together Katniss. You just have to say yes." He stares at me with sad eyes that tear at my heart.

"I'm sorry Gale. No. You're my best friend."

His eyes blaze. "Me being your best friend didn't seem to matter last summer or the one before that!"

As his anger rises mine follows. "Tell me Gale, how many other women have you slept with in the past year?" He pulls a shocked face. He didn't know that I knew he'd had a few girls. I don't blame him. We were never a couple and I was in State 4 most of the year.

"All I want is you." He whispers, tugging at my arm.

"You can't have me." I say almost inaudibly.

"Then what the fuck are we doing Katniss? What has this been? Some fucked up game to you? Two years. Two fucking years we've been at this!" He yells.

We shouldn't have been drinking, not if I was going to break this to him. His anger is only heightened now.

"I don't know what I was doing Gale! I know I fucked up, okay?"

"What do you want from me?"

"I just want my best friend!" I cry.

"Why now? After everything."

I stare at him through my tears. "Because I want something more. I want something meaningful. Not this when we barely see each other and end up in other people's beds."

"This can be something more." He urges me, hands clasping my shoulders.

I shake my head sadly. "No it can't."

I see the fight leave his eyes because he knows I mean it. He knows this has gone on for far too long with no evidence of any commitment. I can see the hurt replace the anger. "Fuck you Katniss." He stands and storms off, leaving me alone in the darkness.

I don't have the energy or the willpower to chase him down. I choose to sit there pathetically, sobbing, as the ocean laps my feet. I'd just lost my best friend.

"Katniss?" The voice comes from behind me and is gentle and soft. I turn and find Thresh approaching me. He sits in the sand next to me, wrapping his arms around his knees.

"Are you okay? What happened?" He asks tenderly.

I glance at him and burst into tears all over again. He hugs me to him, whispering nice things in my ear.

"What happened, honey?"

"Stupid thing with Gale." I mutter bitterly.

"I saw you walk over with him." He states. I knew no one, not even Thresh, was happy with my relationship with Gale. Johanna had only gone along with it so long because she saw a spark of life within me when I was with him. And with Jo being Jo she also liked the break the rules.

"Come on. Let's go back in. You don't want to be out here by yourself."

I try to get up but end up stumbling and nearly falling flat on my face if it wasn't for Thresh. "How much have you had to drink?" He asks seriously.

"A bit."

He sighs. "Okay, I'll walk you home."

"No Thresh-"

"Shut up Katniss." He says affectionately. "You can't make it back by yourself and Gale's gone."

Without waiting for me to answer he walks me up the Strip and back onto the path. He keeps an arm around my waist as we walk back. My head is spinning and I'm trying not to cry again. Damn alcohol. It wreaked havoc with your emotions.

"If I knew Gale at all I'd be beating him up for leaving you back there." Thresh tells me. A smile creeps onto my face.

"Thanks Thresh."

"Anything for you Kat."

It takes longer than usual to get home but Thresh doesn't complain. He seems focused on me as I sullenly stumble my way along with him. When we reach the house I see the front porch light is on. Peeta is sitting in a rocker speaking on his cell phone.

"Thresh, what time is it?"

"12:30. Peet's up late."

Peeta's head rises as we approach. He frowns and snaps his cell shut, walking down the stairs.

"Where's Gale?" He asks.

Thresh sighs. "They fought and he left."

"What?" Peeta demands. I wasn't sure if I was imagining it, but he seemed genuinely angry. "Are you okay?" He asks me.

"I'm fine." I mutter, angry with myself. I pull out of Thresh's grasp and walk towards the stairs trying my hardest not to trip. After saying something to Thresh, Peeta catches up to me. I walk into the house and flop onto the couch unsteadily.

Peeta looks at me for a moment then walks into the kitchen and in a few minutes comes back with two mugs of tea and a blanket. He sits next to me and I fold the blanket over the two of us. I was slowly sobering up.

The house is silent as we sit on the couch together. "Where are Jo and Finn?" I ask quietly trying to stop the spinning in my head.

"Sleeping."

"Why are you awake?"

"I was speaking to my father."

I realize something new must have happened with the case but right now I don't care to know and Peeta doesn't offer to say. Exhausted and still drunk, I rest my head on his shoulder and give him some more blanket.

"What happened tonight?" His eyes pulled down with concern.

I sigh, my eyes drooping. "Can I tell you tomorrow?"

I feel his head nod and an arm gently snakes around my shoulders. "I'm sorry your last night was ruined."

My lips turn up slightly. "Thanks for being so nice to me Peeta." I hear him chuckle and say something but I'm already drifting off to sleep.

A/N: Thanks for reading! Over 100 followers, you guys are really great! I'm so glad people are liking it. Thanks to all the reviewers it's been helpful to see what you think about each chapter :)

So do you like the direction this is heading? What about the fight with Gale?

Thanks again,

-Elli