Sweet Bells

Me and dad talked for about an hour and a half. He asked about mam, and I told him the whole story; everything since he left. He was quiet for a minute, but then he started talking about himself. I had been looking forward to that. I wasn't sure if I wanted him to have been happier without mam. I knew that it was more my fault than his that he didn't take me, and I found that I actually cared about him, which was weird.

Apparently he had been unhappy for a long time after he left. He told me that he and Amelia moved away very soon after the divorce had been legalized. They had gone to live in Llanfair PG, and he had great fun teaching Amelia how to say the full name (I'll write it at the bottom of the page for those of you who aren't educated in Welsh geography) and I silently vowed that I'd teach Rick and Elektra how to pronounce it when I'd found out when dad had gone.

Dad then told me about Amelia, and that was when I started to realize what dad ultimately wanted. He said that she looked like me a lot, and that you could tell that we were sisters. He also said that if everything went to plan I would see a lot more of her. The conversation dried up after that. I was trying to work out what dad could want with me after all this time, and he kept shooting nervous glances at Mike, who was still in the room.

Eventually he said that he had a question for me. I knew that it would be big; because he had asked me plenty of questions before without saying that he was going to first. He had already told me that he hadn't remarried since splitting up with mam, and when he had told me he had looked slightly shifty, but now he told me that he was getting remarried.

I wasn't too surprised, but I was confused. Did he really come all the way from Llanfair to tell me that he was going to marry someone who wasn't mam? Why did I even need to know? Did he want my permission? It took about five minutes of him waffling on about his fiancée Marie before he actually asked me the question. He asked me if I would be a bridesmaid. Then I burst into tears.

I was embarrassing to say the least. I didn't usually cry, especially not because I'd been asked to be a bridesmaid. I guess that I was still confused. How could this complete stranger want me to play an important part at her wedding when mam and Rhyd who had known me my whole life didn't even want me to be present at their wedding? Also, wouldn't it introduce tension between dad and Marie; the kid of his previous wife suddenly butting in on the situation?

I didn't know what to say. I wanted to be a bridesmaid, because I'd never been to a wedding before, but I didn't want to get at all attached to another family that might ignore me and make me feel terrible.

Dad told me that I didn't have to decide right away because he and Marie weren't getting married for another month, but he told me that Marie had decided that she wanted to show him that his past didn't bother her, and she wanted to help him to embrace it and recover from the loss or something. He sounded as confused by that as I did, so I felt a bit better. He left me his number, told me to think hard about it and he left.

I was completely shaken up. I didn't know how I felt, and I didn't know if I wanted to meet Marie, or see Amelia again. What if she had the same attitude towards me as Gemma had done? Would they decided that they'd made a massive mistake and ditch me? I went to talk to Elektra. She had been a bridesmaid for her sister when she got married and I wanted to ask her what it was like.

She was surprisingly helpful. She said that it was a great experience, but she also said that she mucked it up a bit. She told me that I needed to think about it very carefully, because if I agreed, then they might try and have control of me, but she still seemed to think that it was a good idea.

I thought about that for a bit. If they wanted me to be a bridesmaid, did that mean that they wanted me to be their daughter? Would they want me to move in with them and pretend that dad had never decided to leave me behind? Would I have to leave my dream so soon after it had started? I thought about it a lot, and I decided that I needed one thing to help me decide. I needed to meet Marie.

Author's Note: Thanks for reading! If you have any ideas, they would be welcome. Sorry again for the slow updates. Please leave a review and be nice ;)

BTW: Llanfair PG's full name is Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch. Try pronouncing that my non-welsh readers!