You can check the fanart for this chapter here, title: (Tony Stark: Anxiety attack)

nako- 13- yeh. deviantart. com

oOo

Chapter 10

The screen showed Colonel Rhodes and Tony in a public place and Tony was drawing or writing something for two little kids. Tony was focused, but he was still listening to Rhodes.

"I'm worried about you, Tony."

"Oh boy." Tony did not like this part.

Tony watched it before and he really did not want to watch it again.

It was already echoing inside his head and it was too much. Rhodey was like a brother to him, he was such a good friend and they were close. But Rhodey was from the military and Tony was just Tony. How could he compare? And now, Tony was watching the future of him and his friend of what they would most likely talk about.

"This is so not cool." Tony frowned.

"I don't think talking in a public place is a good thing." Natasha crossed her arms. "You never know if there are people wanting to listen in."

"Why did you choose this place?" Steve wondered.

"Beats me." Tony shrugged.

"Well, you guys are pretty chill about it." Clint said.

"Listen." Rhodes leaned closer. "The pentagon is scared. After New York, Aliens, come on."

Tony winced at those words, he really didn't think that those words would get to him. He was a hero right? Or was he just a tin can that everyone thinks they could step on?

Tony really did not know.

"The pentagon is scared?" Clint scoffed.

"You need to look strong." He continued. "Stopping the Mandarin is priority, but—"

Tony looked as if he was losing himself already, and the way he was writing showed that. His entire facial expression knew he was uncomfortable with the topic. It was calculating and complicated, like he was ready to snap.

Natasha and Clint continued to watch. The two assassins couldn't help but glance at Tony ever so often. Tony, who was sitting there, eying the screen intently looked like he was about to pass out.

They saw his hand, it was shaking.

"Hey Nat." Clint moved his chair a bit closer to hers. "You see what I see?"

"Noted." She whispered. "How long do you think it's been going on depending on what we saw in the trailer?"

"Could be a few days since his trip to space."

"Good, keep your eyes open." Natasha leaned back. "And keep quiet."

"I'm cool with that." Clint leaned back.

"I—it's not—" Rhodey looked around, frantically.

"It's not superhero—"

"No—frankly—"

"Business." Tony said, writing fast. "It's not."

"It's American business."

"Said it—" Snap. "God."

Tony palmed his face, and breathed out in frustration. He stopped for a moment, staring at his work, before shaking his head slightly.

"You okay?" Rhodey asked.

"Broke the crayon."

"Damn it." Tony muttered to himself. "I thought I was ready to see this again."

Tony wondered what they were all thinking because the nerve of them seeing his likely future was a bit stretched, don't you think? He was glad that Thor was away, that makes his life easier by explaining to less people. But explaining a few things to a handful or super people was not on his to do list.

Tony sighed.

He just wanted to speed up time.

"Are you okay, Mr. Stark?" The little girl asked.

"Take it easy." Rhodey said, rubbing Tony's shoulder.

The world began to crush into Tony's personal space. His eyes widened and he felt a rush of air cut away from him. The little boy leaned forward while Tony was in a little daze, troubled and calculating. The boy whispered into his ears, and Tony felt the world stop.

"How did you get out of the wormhole?" The little boy asked.

Tony jumped from his seat and walked out, or rather ran out bumping into people. He got out of the suit, muttering an apology as he held his heart, he was breathing fast as the suit welcomed him.

Tony had his eyes closed at that part.

He was recalling the memory that he wasn't aware of, had stuck in his mind. He rubbed his temples, tightening his eyes shut as the world spun. The team had glanced at him, and he wasn't aware of their worried faces. All Tony could see was the bright lights from the distance, a whole world outside of his own.

That damn wormhole.

"Ummm..." Bruce turned to look for help, noticing that Steve was also aware.

They were worried.

"Should we?" Steve whispered.

They locked eyes with the each other and the rest of the team shook their heads, telling Bruce and Steve in a silent way, not to disturb Tony.

Not yet.

Tony had his eyes and fist clenched tight by now.

That wormhole...

"Check the heart, Check the— check the— is the brain?"

"No sign of cardiac anomaly or unusual brain activity." Jarvis answered him.

"So I was poisoned?"

"My diagnosis says you've experienced a severe anxiety attack."

That snapped Tony out of his day-nightmare.

"Me?" Tony asked in disbelief.

Knock. Knock.

"Come on man, this isn't a good look. Open up."

"Sorry, I got to split." He pushed Rhodey out of the way and flew, changing into a different scene.

That was it.

"Tony?" Bruce asked worriedly. "Is there something we need to know?"

"Don't look at me like that, I'm fine." Tony said, defending himself. "Seriously I am. Nothing's wrong with me."

"Something tells me, you're not." Fury said. "That video proves it. And that trailer."

"Hey!" Tony defended. "It's the future I can choose to happen. It might not happen at all."

"Wormhole, Stark." Natasha repeated, watching Tony cringe.

"Come on, Romanov."

"It had something to do with New York."

"Look, I don't even want to argue with you guys." Tony slumped into his chair. "I know my own body and brain more than any of you. That's not going to happen to me."

Everyone else looked at each other and knew they had to do something later on, and now was not the time to do that. Fury gestured to an Agent to play the next scene.

Tony was just grateful the attention left him.

Oh wait.

It was his movie.

The movie continued to Happy and Tony talking.

"Is this forehead of security?"

"Like I said, you're such a dick." Clint chuckled. "Forehead of security?"

"Must have bumped him up." Tony shrugged. "He was just my driver before, now he's this dude protecting Pepper."

"What are you waiting for? Flip the screen so we can get this started."

"I'm not a tech genius like you." Happy answered.

Later switching to Pepper and Aldrich Killian talking about business. Killian was being too clingy to Pepper and trying to goad her into the project, which Pepper kindly declined. Happy took a picture of the car, suspiciously driving away.

It ended when Pepper had to leave and show up in Malibu to find a huge bunny looking bear, which was huge and was in front of the house.

Nobody commented on that.

Pepper was fooled by Tony, when he was "supposedly" in the suit. He gave her a massage and asked her about her day. They talked about the custom rabbit if Pepper liked it and she started babbling.

"How are you going to fit that into the house?"

They started flirting with each other and it was getting difficult to keep Tony's facade on.

"Can you just.." He tapped the face plate. "Kiss it on the, face slit?"

"It's like watching two teenagers." Clint pretended to gag.

"Don't watch then bird-brain." Tony scoffed.

"No way."

Pepper went downstairs to get the crowbar, only to see the real Tony doing lift ups, and turned to her. Tony wearing a grey and black training outfit the same as before in the trailer. He had a contraption on his forehead, and a single lens on the left side. He stopped doing whatever he was doing and stared at her.

"Did you have to trick her?" Steve said, concerned.

Tony didn't answer.

Should he?

Because he sure as hell won't.

"Busted."

"This is a new level of lame." She scowled, gesturing to the place. "You ate with out me? Already? On date night!?"

"He was just..."

Tony pointed at his creation, who was looking so real and innocent.

"You mean you."

"Well yeah, I just mean we were just..." He sighed, feeling defeated. "Just hosting you while I finished up a little work. And yes, I had a quick bite. I didn't know if you were coming home... Or you were having drinks with Aldrich Killian."

"What?"

Pepper turned to the suit next to her, who turned facing her. "What?!" She turned back to Tony with rage bubbling inside of her.

"Aldrich Killian?" She huffed. "What are you checking up on me?"

"Happy was concerned."

"No, you're spying on me." Pepper rolled her eyes.

Everyone was cautious at the sudden lower of temperature, or what seemed like a lowering of temperature. Because they could have sworn that the atmosphere just got a little darker and heavier. Tony was slumping on his seat, trying to drown away everything and every memory while everyone else was listening intently to their lovers quarrel.

Please end! was Tony's mantra.

It was already late in the afternoon, and he just wanted to get to bed.

And totally 'not' sleep.

"I'm going to bed."

Great.

Just peachy.

"Hold on." Tony called. "Come on. Pep-Hey, I admit it!"

She stopped.

"My fault. Sorry. I'm a piping hot mess." He admitted. "It's been going on for a while... I haven't said anything."

He stood there with his arms crossed.

"Nothing's been the same since New York." Tony admitted to Pepper.

"Great." Tony rolled his eyes. "Way to prove me wrong."

"We were right." Bruce thought. "Tony isn't fine. He's not."

"He should just tell us." Steve sighed.

"It's true." Both Clint and Natasha thought.

"Well I'll be damned." Fury glared.

"Oh really?" She didn't look convinced. "Oh, I— I didn't notice that. At all."

"You experience things, and then they're over and you can't explain them?" Tony scowled. "Gods, aliens, other dimensions? I'm— I'm just a man in a can."

Steve felt guilty that his words had stuck to Tony, and he wanted to apologize to him. But looking at Tony, he wasn't shaping out very well. Steve wondered if he saw his own movie, will he act the same way Tony was acting right now.

Tony was in denial.

He did not want to believe this.

"The only reason I haven't cracked up, is probably because you moved in." He exhaled. "Which is great, I love you, I'm lucky."

"Pep." Tony mumbled, trying to focus.

"He isn't this open." Natasha rethought her experiences with Tony. "Not even to Pepper."

"But honey, I can't sleep."

Bruce eyed Tony, noticing the bags under his eyes. He really didn't look like he was sleeping, more like he was pretending to sleep. And that 72 hours comment made it worse for Bruce because he really was worried about Tony.

"You go to bed; I come down here to do what I know. I tinker." He said as he sat on one of the tables. "Threat is imminent, and I have to protect the one thing I can't live without."

He pointed at Pepper.

"That's you."

Tony closed his eyes, wishing this was over soon. He hated prying eyes, he hated how his privacy was being touched, he hated the future and how predictable it seemed to him.

He loved fame, don't get him wrong, but he hated Shield at the moment.

And Steve.

"And my suits, they're a—"

"Machines."

"They're a part of me." He immediately said.

"A distraction."

Tony took a while before he agreed. "Maybe." So Pepper strode forward and locked eyes with Tony, before she embraced him and cuddled him tightly. Tony looked up, looking like he lost the battle and just settled to being held there. "I'm gonna take a shower." She said.

"Okay." Tony replied disappointingly.

"And you're going to join me."

"Better." Tony nodded, following.

"Pep." Tony bit his lips. "You love me right? I have to know when we get back to Earth. I need to know. I really do. This is the future. Right? Prove me right."

"Tony? Tony… Tony wake up."

He was remembering the portal, the Chitauri. The giant wormhole in the sky as the darkness surrounded him.

There he was… falling.

"Oh god. Not again." Tony palmed his face, recalling the same thing.

"Tony?" Bruce called, a little concerned.

Tony slumped forward in his seat, unmoving, just sitting there looking like he had been kicked in the stomach. He tried to catch his breath, unable to stop himself from going into that position. Every person in the room took a glance before the scene jolted them back to the screen.

Pepper screamed as the Iron Man suit held onto her, Tony woke up and acted swiftly.

"Power down!" He commanded.

With one flick of his hands, he disabled the suit.

He dropped to the bed, panting.

"I must have called it in my sleep... that's not supposed to happen. I'll recalibrate the sensors. Just let me catch my breath, okay? Don't go, alright? Pepper?"

"I'm going to sleep downstairs." She glared. "Tinker with that."

Pepper was angry while Tony was muttering about fixing it. She left him alone on the bed, while he had a lot to think about.

"Tony?" Bruce stood up, walking in front of the unmoving mechanic.

"How is he?" Steve asked, concerned for him.

"I'm not sure." Bruce mumbled. "Tony, are you okay?"

"He doesn't look like he's responding." Natasha tilted her head. "He's unstable, just like Loki."

"How long do you think this has been going on?" Steve wondered.

"Afghanistan is my guess." Fury eyed Tony, who twitched at the words.

If Tony was okay, he'll yell I can hear you. I'm right inside the room with you guys. But no, he was still hunched on his seat, clutching the arc reactor, trying to protect it. Man, he never knew he could feel like this again and he hated it. Right now, the whole world was against him and it was arguably the most aggravating thing to him at the moment.

Bruce was already up.

"I don't think that's a good idea." Clint called.

When Bruce reached to touch Tony, he jolted upwards like he was in shock and composed himself.

"Bruce. It's you."

"What was that, Tony?"

"Sorry that was nothing. Sorry." He mumbled and chuckled nervously.

"You shouldn't apologize."

"Yeah." Tony panted. "Sorry. Worried you there for a second. I'm fine."

"Cut with the crap, Stark." Clint eyed him.

"I'm okay."

"You have an issue."

"And you don't?" Tony turned back to Clint sharply. "That could be anything. I'm okay, fooled you for a sec."

"That wasn't a joke." Natasha narrowed her eyes.

"Oh you would know. You're an expert."

"You haven't been sleeping well, have you?" Fury asked.

"Have you?" He bit back, feeling so snappy today. "We're all just tired, give it time."

"I'm sure that if you give yours time, it will be worse." Bruce said, now that he's on doctor mode. "You should see a therapist."

"I don't need a therapist." Tony defended. "I don't have an anxiety issue."

"Then have yourself tested out." Natasha answered.

"No."

"You have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder." Hill intervened.

"There's no proof."

"It was all over the news." Fury stated. "That reporter..."

"Is a piece of shit." Tony rolled his eyes. "They have all sorts of things on me that are bad publicity."

"Shouldn't you be in medication?" Hill questioned.

"Oh god, what are you people, my nanny?" Tony stood up. "I'm going back to my room, don't bother calling me."

He walked out and they wanted to follow.

"Leave him." Fury said. "I'll have someone check up on him from the camera later on when we're done."

"Are you sure that's wise?" Bruce mumbled. "Knowing Tony—"

"I doubt he would do anything at the moment."

"Wouldn't he be a liability if this keeps going?" Steve asked. "I've seen men end up this way and tried coming back to battle. They either get themselves killed or their comrades."

"We deal with him later."

oOo

Tony did not like meeting expectations.

Instead of going to his room, Tony decided to head towards the other direction. Meaning, instead of going to his room like a good boy, he just had to be a rebel and go to the infirmary where Thor had headed earlier on. He asked Jarvis to find an undetectable way into fooling the camera in the infirmary, so the Agents who were monitoring Thor and Loki, won't find him there.

With his ingeniousness, he hacked the system.

Now, no one will suspect him going to the infirmary.

There weren't any patrols there and Tony was relieved. Thor had probably frightened them off and the Agents didn't want to piss of the god of thunder. Wow, they really were cowards hiding behind their names.

And what about the rest of the team?

BAH! Forget them.

He needed to get out of there anyways.

Falling.

Falling. Death. Yinsen. Death. Falling.

How did you get out of the wormhole?

Falling.

Darkness.

Breathe, Mr. Stark! Breathe!

Make us a missile.

Ten Rings.

Tony stopped walking, took a deep breath and relaxed himself by the wall, trying to keep his balance.

"Calm down." He told himself. "You're okay, you're fine."

Flashes of memory wiped his entire view of the hallway headed to the infirmary

He blacked out for a moment.

"Don't waste your life." Yinsen's voice echoed in his head.

"I'm not." He answered.

"Did you miss your boss?" He heard himself say to Pepper.

"You can't go solo, Tony." Rhodey yelled.

"I'll be using this." Then there was Obadiah. Smirking right at his face. "Thank you Tony, for this creation."

His vision returned and he found himself balancing on his legs, using the wall as leverage. He was sweating and he knew his eyes were probably blown wide, but he forced himself to keep walking. He had to move, because if he didn't, he would just stop.

"Keep going." He told himself. "You are not having an attack. That's for wimps."

"Sir, you just did." Jarvis said.

"That could be anything."

"That was an anxiety attack, Sir."

"It's mild." Tony stated.

"Forgive me for my correction, Sir, but that was not mild."

"That's normal." Tony breathed as he kept walking to where the infirmary was.

Tony could see it vividly thanks to the video they showed earlier. He hated himself for being such a pushover, even to himself. He thought he was fine by re-watching it again, but apparently, he was wrong.

"You just had to be the hero." Tony told himself. "Jarvis, where to now?"

"Take a left and another right, Sir. But I would be quick about it."

"Yeah whatever." Tony followed. "Thanks."

"Take the left of the intersection, Sir."

Tony wondered if he was going mad like Loki was, or if he'd break down like Loki did. As if, right? He wondered if Loki had slept better than him, but he immediately doubted that. Tony had kept himself awake most of the time, tinkering with his phone, or just messing with personnel in Shield.

If he reaches a corner, he would tell Pepper.

Falling.

"Yeah, I'll tell Pepper." Tony told himself.

"Sir, may I ask if you are alright?" Jarvis questioned. "Should I alert someone?"

"NO." He gritted his teeth. "Don't be like them Jarvis."

So much Falling and there was no escaping it. Darkness. It was everywhere, in every corner, in every opposite of a light. Water. The whole world was surrounded with water.

"It's in my program to monitor you Sir, and your heartbeat is off the charts and rising." Jarvis said. "Might I advise you to calm down?"

Blood and screaming. His own blood on his hands and then another, possibly Pepper, or Rhodey? He couldn't think straight, it was too overwhelming and the safety was no where. He couldn't reach a happy thought.

There was just drowning.

Portal.

Aliens.

Kidnapping.

"I'm calm, Jarvis." Tony swallowed. "I'm calm."

No he wasn't.

Tony couldn't get the thoughts out of his head and he just wished for a distraction. Well, that was his plan from the start. He reached the infirmary, and his eyes watered and his body was shaking slightly.

"Get out."

"Move."

"Don't waste your life, Tony Stark."

"Now the true history of Stark name will be written."

"You have no idea what you are dealing with!"

"OH GOD. Shut up." Tony hissed under his breath, as he began to run towards the door to the infirmary room. It was locked and he just felt himself stop, waiting for the flood of memories to go away. The voices were echoing around him, and he was confused as to why that was happening. Maybe he really was mental, and he just couldn't accept it.

He froze.

"Big man in a suit of armor, take that away and what are you?"

"Shield monitors potential threats!"

"Stark we got a missile headed—"

"Jarvis, open door." Tony muttered, lost in thought.

Not again.

"A moment, Sir."

Tony felt the world go slower. So he ordered Jarvis again.

"Now." He screamed. "NOW! Open the door."

oOo

TBC

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