A/N: All info located in chapter "Over" posting.
Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Stephenie Meyer, the creator of Twilight.
New Bella made her way back to the table where Rose, Emmett and now Edward were sitting and talking. She plastered a fake smile onto her face and took a seat.
"Hello everyone. What did I miss?"
Edward turned to her, concerned.
"Love, are you alright? Rose here was telling me you were feeling a little sick."
Bella smiled wider. "I'm fine, sweetie. I felt a little nauseous but it passed." Oh, boy, did it pass.
He still looked a little worried so she leaned forward and put her hand on his leg. "I'm alright."
He nodded and smiled. He covered her hand with his and she could see that fire starting up in his eyes again. She looked down at their hands, lifted his and kissed it before removing hers from his grasp.
She crossed her legs and sat back in her chair, unwilling to look at her husband's disappointment. She felt a little guilty but New Bella was Jake's. And only Jake's. And after what happened upstairs, she didn't want anyone else's hands on her. They didn't belong on the skin that clearly belonged to Jake, that had been touched by him, still had his scent all over it. No, she wouldn't go there. As much as she loved Edward, she loved Jake, too.
"So Rose..."
Rose stared at her intently; her eyebrows furrowed a little, as if she was trying to figure her out.
Bella grinned, raising an eyebrow. "What'd I miss?"
Emmett laughed and kissed Rose's temple.
Rose smiled and shook her head.
"Not much. So I take it you're feeling better?"
Bella smirked wider. "Yes. I am feeling much better."
Emmett smiled and looked down, shaking his head.
Rose snorted and looked over Edward's shoulder.
Bella took a deep breath. Yes, she was indeed feeling better.
Emmett grinned at her.
"So Bella..."
She grinned right back.
"So Emmett..."
He wiggled his eyebrow at her. "I took the liberty of making a song request while you were gone."
Bella's smile dropped. "You've got to be fucking kidding me."
The others all laughed. She glared at Emmett and he smiled in response.
"You owe me, Bella. We made a deal. Aren't you going to keep your end?" He raised an eyebrow in challenge.
She laughed. "Sure, Em. It's your funeral."
He guffawed. "Aw Bella, it won't be that bad."
She gave him a mock glare. "Uh huh."
Ness' voice once again garnered their attention. "Hey guys."
They all turned to look at her and she was standing there, grinning brightly. Jake was standing next to her, his eyes trained on his wife.
Bella narrowed her eyes but kept the smile on. At least he was with his wife and not any of those nasty little sluts from before.
"How is everything?"
They all smiled and nodded.
"Good."
"Great party."
"Everything's wonderful, thank you."
Ness smiled brighter. "Great. Edward, Emmett, I was wondering if you guys could join me for a moment. Hoffman himself is here and I thought it would be great if we could go say hello."
Edward turned and gave Bella that small smile of apology again. "Sorry, love."
She grabbed his hand and squeezed it. "Edward, you don't have to be sorry every time. It's fine, sweetie." He smiled wide and kissed her hand before standing up.
Truth is, New Bella was still there but she still felt a bit guilty. Whether she was Old Bella or New Bella, that guilt would never go away. Edward was a good man and he loved her. She knew that. And as much as New Bella loved Jake, Old Bella still loved her husband.
Emmett kissed Rose on the top of her head. "I'll be right back, babe. Gotta go kiss ass."
Bella, Edward, Rose and Jake laughed. Ness rolled her eyes and smiled. "Come on, Emmett. It won't take that long. This is important."
Emmett grinned at Bella. "Don't forget, Bella. I'll be listening."
Bella rolled her eyes this time. "Jesus, Em. You really have a death wish, don't you?"
Emmett grinned wider. "I do like to live dangerously." He winked at her and she laughed, looking down.
Ness kissed Jake as the other two guys stood up behind her. "Okay, sweetie. I'll be right back. Why don't you go and mingle in the meantime?"
Bella saw Jake lower his eyes and she could see a light blush on his cheeks. She wanted nothing more than to get up, grab his hand and pull him out of there.
"Yeah sure, hon."
Ness smiled and then led Edward and Emmett away, leaving the other three to themselves.
Bella stared at Jake and he met her eyes.
Bella heard Rose clear her throat but didn't look at her. Neither did Jake.
"I'm going to get a refill. I'll be back." Bella nodded but never once turned to the other woman.
Jake walked over to her and held out his hand.
"Can we take a walk?"
Bella nodded and took his hand, standing up. He then let her hand go and placed it at her elbow and led her away from the dance floor, towards a few doors underneath the staircase. He kept glancing around and then pulled her near a door. When satisfied that no one was really paying attention to them, he opened the door and pulled them inside. He closed the door behind them, enveloping them in darkness.
He flipped a switch and a light shone down on them. He had pulled her into a large walk-in closet of some sort. This looked like where they would keep the coats of the guests if it weren't in the middle of July.
He placed her up against the wall and wrapped his arms around her. He then buried his face into her neck, moving the hair out of the way first and placing a gentle kiss on the mark he had made earlier which was starting to bruise. He took a deep breath and exhaled warm air against her neck.
It gave her goose bumps but right now she knew he needed her and not sexually. Something was bothering him and he was looking to her for comfort.
She tightened his arms around him and threaded her fingers into his hair and massaged his scalp just the way he liked. She then whispered to him. "What's the matter, baby?"
He tightened his hold on her, burying his face into her neck even further.
"Nothing. I just hate this shit."
He sighed deeply and she used her other hand to rub his back soothingly.
"Baby, if it bothers you so much, then why do you do it?"
He chuckled. "I don't really have a choice, Bells."
She frowned and held him tighter. "Yes, you do. You can tell her no. Or better yet, just ignore her. Ignore her and stay near me." She placed a gentle kiss to his shoulder in front of her.
He took another deep breath. "I wish it were that simple."
Her frown intensified. "It is that simple."
She felt him place another kiss against her neck. "It's not, Bells."
She was pissed now. Why was he all of a sudden worrying about doing his wife's bidding? What was going on? "It is!"
He sighed again. "Baby, I don't want to fight. Please. I'll explain it all to you later but right now, can I just hold you? Please?"
She took a deep breath and placed her forehead against his shoulder. She waited a minute and when she felt a little calmer, she nodded.
He pulled her into him even tighter and she rubbed his back as she laid her head on his shoulder, looking away from them. "I'm so tired, Jake."
"You and me both, sweetheart."
She closed her eyes and listened to their mingled breathing.
She heard him chuckle lightly. "Although, I blame you for most of that."
Her eyes flipped open. "Me?"
"Uh-huh."
Bella smiled. "Last time I checked, Mr. Black, you weren't complaining."
She felt him press another soft kiss to her neck. "Never."
She smiled wider and closed her eyes. "Baby?"
"Mmm?"
"I love you. I just want you to be happy, to be okay. That's all. I'm not trying to tell you what to do or what I think you should do. I'm sorry."
She heard his breathing stop and she opened her eyes. Shit, had she said something wrong?
Silence passed for another minute and Bella began to worry maybe she had said too much. Had she really pissed him off?
"Bella."
"Yeah?"
"Don't ever be sorry for speaking your mind to me. I want to hear it and I love you even more for it. Even when we fight and you drive me absolutely up the fucking wall sometimes, I will never get tired of hearing it. So don't ever be sorry or hold back with me, okay?"
She furrowed her brows in confusion. "Okay." She wasn't really sure where that had come from.
Then he lifted his head and looked down at her. He leaned in and kissed her sweetly.
"I love you, baby."
She kissed him back and then pulled away to look up at him.
"Will you be okay?"
He smiled and kissed her nose.
And then his head turned towards the door as the music changed.
He turned to her with a huge grin on his face. "I think you owe me one more dance."
Bella glared at him. "What is this? A fucking conspiracy between you and Emmett?"
He laughed and kissed her nose again. "I don't know what Em's got planned but I want one more dance with you. Come on."
Bella rolled her eyes and sighed heavily. "Okay. Just one. And that's only 'cause I love you."
He laughed again and kissed her. "I am one lucky guy."
She smirked up at him. "You got that right."
He grinned at her and led them to the door. He flicked the switch and opened the door. When he determined that no one would notice them, he pulled them through the door and closed it behind them. He turned and smiled at her, taking her hand and leading her out to the dance floor.
He set them up as before but this time, held her even closer. He held her right hand in his left and she gripped his right shoulder with her left hand. She kept her head looking over his right shoulder and he kept his near her right ear. He began to move them slowly.
Bella snorted. "I hope you are enjoying this because it is not happening again."
He chuckled. "You know, I seem to remember you telling me something else wasn't going to happen, either."
Bella pulled back to smirk up at him, arching her eyebrow. "And your point?"
He grinned impishly. "None whatsoever."
She nodded and leaned into his shoulder again. "Thought so."
He held her tighter and placed his mouth at her ear. "Do you know this song?"
She listened for a minute and shook her head.
"Listen to the words."
And so she did. It was a woman singing a very slow song. It sounded...jazzy...but not. Too slow to be jazz.
And then he was singing quietly in her ear.
"I've got you deep in the heart of me,"
She smiled and rested her chin on his shoulder.
"So deep in my heart that you're really a part of me,"
He was really singing to her. She never wanted to hold him to her so much as she did now.
"I've got you under my skin,"
She looked around them. She didn't see anyone watching them so she placed a swift kiss to his shoulder.
She felt his hands grip her tighter.
"I'd tried so not to give in
I said to myself, 'This affair will never go so well'
But why should I try to resist when, baby, I know so well
I've got you under my skin"
She felt tears starting to sting her eyes. The words were perfect. The song was perfect. He was perfect. She took a deep breath and leaned her head against his.
"I'd sacrifice anything come what might
For the sake of havin' you near,"
And then he began humming softly into her ear. She closed her eyes for just a second.
"Do you like it?"
She opened her eyes and nodded. "Yeah, I've never heard it before." She hadn't meant to whisper but she knew if she said it with any more energy, tears would start streaming uncontrollably down her cheeks.
He chuckled. "I didn't think so."
"It's perfect."
"I asked the deejay to play it for you. I wasn't sure if I could get you for a dance but I was hoping. Of course, I had to pay him an extra fifty bucks to push it ahead of Emmett's request. Apparently, I was a little distracted before and Emmett beat me to it."
Bella normally would have laughed but instead, she gripped him tighter and placed her lips near his ear. "You asked them to play this for me?"
"Um, yeah. I-I hope that's okay." She could hear the nervousness behind his voice and she smiled.
"It's beautiful, thank you."
"You're welcome, honey."
She felt his lips brush against her ear in a feather light kiss and she smiled wider and rested her chin back on his shoulder.
They danced quietly for a minute or two, listening to the song, when he whispered to her.
"Hey baby?"
"Yeah?"
"Have you been remembering what I told you earlier?"
She pulled back to look at him and nodded.
"Just...keep remembering it, okay? We've only got a few more hours in this place and then we'll be back at the house. And then we'll go for our little walk like I promised."
She nodded again.
He smiled.
She stared up at him and he smiled wider.
"What is it, baby?"
She shook her head and smiled. "Nothing. Just...thinking, that's all."
His eyebrows mashed together in confusion. "About what?"
"About you. About us. About this whole thing. I never expected any of this and yet, here we are and I know maybe it's wrong to say it, but...I couldn't be happier."
His eyes lit up and he gripped her tighter. "Me either, honey. Me either." He gave her the smile that she loved.
She was about to rest her head against his again when she heard a voice next to them.
"May I cut in?"
They both turned to find Edward facing them, smiling a tight smile.
Bella looked at Jake. She knew she shouldn't refuse but...this was Jake's song to her.
She opened her mouth to tell him no, not caring in the least how suspicious or angry that would make her husband when Jake squeezed her hand and spoke up first.
"Sure thing, Edward. I was just warming her up for you. She's all yours."
He let go of her hand and stepped back. Edward stepped in his place and pulled Bella into him, wrapping both arms around her waist. She wrapped both arms around his neck and pulled herself up so she could look at Jake over his shoulder.
Jake just stared at her and smiled. He mouthed the word 'Remember,' and then walked away.
She felt like crying as she watched him go. He had them play this song for her, something he wanted her to hear and they weren't even able to finish dancing to it. Yes, she definitely wanted to cry.
She was brought back to reality by Edward's voice.
"I don't like the way he's been looking at you, Bella."
She could feel herself getting angry.
"What? Edward, what are you talking about? He's been nothing but gracious and kind to both of us. Just as Ness has."
He snorted and pulled back to look at her. "'Gracious and kind', huh? I think he's been around you a little too much lately."
She frowned. "What does that mean? Edward, I haven't seen him since our dinner almost two weeks ago. First time I saw him was yesterday at their house. What exactly are you trying to say?"
Edward sighed. "It's not you, love. I'm not doubting you. It's him I don't trust. I don't want him anywhere near you."
Her frown intensified. She felt somewhat bad because if only Edward knew what had been going on the past six weeks, he would realize the truth and conviction of his words that now weighed heavily upon her conscience.
"Is this about last night? Is that why you dislike him so much? Edward, I told you, we just talked. Nothing happened."
She wished she would just drop the subject. Each lie coming out of her mouth was burning like poison and the sting only got worse as she lied more and more. But for some reason, she felt like she needed to defend him.
Edward frowned back at her. "It has nothing to do with that. Well, no, that's not true. It does have something to do with that. Bella, he's got you in his sights and I don't want you around him. Period."
She narrowed her eyes at him. "Period? Oh buddy, you better give me something better than that. You will not tell me who I can and cannot talk to unless you give me one hell of a good reason."
She could feel her face flushing with anger. She understood his concerns and some of them were completely justified, but who the hell did he think he was ordering her like that?
He took a deep breath. "Bella, trust me when I say I have very good reason to be suspicious of his motives. I know his pattern and he's planning on making a move on you this time."
Bella did a double take. "What do you mean, 'this time'?"
Edward sighed again. "Bella, love, I never told you before because Ness is a very private person and doesn't like her dirty laundry, so to speak, to be aired out. You must never mention it. It would devastate her. Even though she already knows, having more people know would only hurt her further."
Bella felt her heart start to race. That dread was there again, grinning the Cheshire Cat's grin at her. "Of course, Edward. You can tell me. You know that."
He took a deep breath. "Jacob's had affairs before. He cheats on her left and right. Ever since they've been married. The whole company knows. His lack of sensitivity to his wife allowed her to find out that he's slept with almost every woman working there. And these events? He leaves her side just so he can go dally with the women that are all over him at these things. He'll take them in some dark hallway or closet or empty room. It's disgusting."
She couldn't breathe. No. No, that wasn't true. No. Jake would never lie to her. He'd told her about the flirting. He'd told her that she was the only affair he'd ever had in his short marriage to his wife. No, Edward had it wrong. He was just spouting the toxic product of company gossip. That's all.
She plastered a fake smile on her face. Where she found the strength to she didn't know.
"Edward, I'm sure that's all just speculation. Jacob doesn't seem like the type of guy that would do something like that. He loves Ness. You should've seen how upset and broken up he was last night when he told me they were having problems. He was practically in tears."
Edward gave her a crooked smile. "See? I knew he was trying to work you." The smile wiped off his face and he sighed. "I should have seen it coming. I'm so sorry, Bella. I've just been so preoccupied with work but now that I know what he's planning, I'm going to take extra measures to make sure he doesn't get what he wants."
Bella stared at him. "Edward, you don't need to take 'extra measures'. I'm telling you, this is insane. Nothing more than office gossip, that's all." She laughed weakly, just praying he wouldn't hear the nervousness behind it.
He sighed once more. "Bella, it's not gossip. Ness has told me herself."
Bella's eyes widened. "What do you mean?"
He looked at her sadly. "Bella, I told you. The whole company knows. We've all seen him with the women. Ness was so embarrassed and hurt when she caught him with Tanya-"
Bella gaped at him. "He slept with Tanya?"
"Yes. She caught them in a stock room at the office."
"No. You would have fired her. I mean-"
"I can't, love. She does her job. And I wasn't the one to catch her. If she's fired for merely sleeping with her employer's husband, she could turn around and sue. It's too risky. Trust me, Ness doesn't like it any more than the rest of us, but her father's company is her top priority. She won't tarnish its image or put it in jeopardy because her husband can't restrain himself."
Bella felt all the air leave her. No, no, no. No. No, this wasn't possible. No, this wasn't true. Edward was lying to her. Why would he lie to her about this? Why? "Then why doesn't she just divorce him?"
Edward frowned. "Because she still loves him, Bella. She still has it in her head that they can work it out. That's why she was so upset this morning when I told her about last night. I hope you'll forgive me for that, but after watching him operate for so long, I couldn't keep quiet any longer. And for him to think he can make a move on my wife..." He looked angry but he glanced down between them. "He's not to be trusted."
Bella couldn't think, couldn't see, couldn't hear really. All she heard was Edward's voice and she clung to it like a life raft. "Oh."
They had stopped dancing some time ago. Bella couldn't even be sure what music was playing right now.
She stared up at him. "So if you think that he's...trying to come on to me, then why didn't you...tell me earlier?"
Edward again looked sadly at her. He began to stroke her cheek.
"I'm sorry, Bella. I should have. I just didn't realize...I mean, like you said, you haven't seen him since that dinner and well...Ness told me something and I thought he was otherwise engaged."
Bella's brows were mashed together so tightly they almost hurt. "Otherwise engaged?"
Edward put his hand on her arm and led her off the dance floor to the table they had been sitting at which was now empty. Once they sat down, Edward took her hand in his and kissed it.
"Ness suspected he was having yet another affair. She came to me and Emmett last week and told us she had found a number in his phone. One of his old flings. She was very upset and she wasn't sure what to do. Eventually, we calmed her down and again pleaded her to divorce the disgusting dog. And again, she claimed she would beg him to work it out yet again, that they could make this work, that they loved each other."
Bella took another breath. "What was the name?"
She knew it was a suspicious question but right now she couldn't be bothered to care. Right now, she was going insane and only Edward could put her out of her misery.
"Bella?"
She cleared her throat, realizing the question had come out quite garbled the first time. "What was the name she found? Who was the 'old fling'?"
Edward shook his head, clearly disgusted. "Some girl from his past. Leanne-Lela-Layla or something."
No. No. No, please. "Leah?"
Edward snapped up to look at her. "Leah! That's it! How did you know that?"
Her head hurt and she was quite dizzy. She felt like she was going to throw up. But she managed to answer him. "He mentioned the name last night but very incoherently. I just figured it was the alcohol talking, you know?"
Edward seemed to accept the quickly offered up lie. "Huh. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe he's not trying to come on to you. Why else would he mention one of his past flings to you? The one he's currently having? It doesn't make any sense really. This is gonna break poor Ness' heart. Again."
She didn't care about Ness. She couldn't. Right now, the world was spinning. She had seen him throw her card away. She had seen it. But then again, he had stared at an awful long time. And he had typed something into his phone on their way to the park. She just figured it was a text message or something. Oh god, the park.
She felt really sick to her stomach. But if she ran to the bathroom now, Edward would be suspicious.
Her brain took over for her yet again. She laughed. "That's what I've been trying to tell you, Edward. You worry too much." She leaned forward and kissed him chastely. She didn't feel it. She couldn't feel anything right now.
He gave her a warm smile. "Sorry, love. I didn't mean to think the worst. I just panicked. Can you forgive me?"
She smiled back at him. "Of course, you're forgiven. And now that you told me, I might just have to back myself into a corner every time I see him."
Edward laughed and kissed her forehead. "Might not be a bad idea."
She laughed with him. It was amazing that her brain was making her do these things when all she wanted to do was scream and curl up into a ball.
She couldn't take it anymore. She had to get out of there.
She kissed his cheek and then pulled away. "Honey, I'm gonna run to the bathroom quick. Rose gave me some make-up just in case I need to touch up and I was given stern instructions to check every half hour. And it's been almost thirty minutes since the last time I was ordered into the bathroom, so do you mind if I go check it quick so I don't get yelled at?"
Edward chuckled. "Of course not, love. I'm gonna go find Em. He didn't look too happy when I left him standing there to talk to Hoffman alone. I think I'll go save him." He gave her another kiss and a wink and headed off in the opposite direction.
Bella felt like she couldn't breathe. She needed some air.
She made her way over to the large terrace doors and stepped out on the patio. She didn't look at anyone; she just walked past the pool and towards the pool shed standing at the end of the property. She needed to just get away from everyone and everything. No more music, no more talking, nothing. She stepped around the side of the shed and braced her back against the wall and leaned her head back, closing her eyes.
She tried to suck in gulps of air.
He wouldn't have done this to her. No, he told her he loved her. Edward had it wrong and so did Ness. Bella had seen him throw Leah's number away. Maybe it wasn't the same Leah. They had acted like they didn't know each other. No. This wasn't possible. And Tanya? Yes, he did seem very friendly to her on the phone that day but she had just chalked it up to him trying to get on her nerves as well as him being flirtatious. He had made it clear that he wasn't crazy about her advances. So what was all this stuff about Ness finding them in a stock room? What? Nothing made sense. No, they had to be wrong. Yes, they were wrong.
She remembered his words to her earlier that night. He had told her to trust him. To know that he loved her and only her. He had told her to make sure to remember it. That that was all that mattered. So that's what she would do, she would remember.
And just like magic, she heard his voice.
"Victoria, I told you. No more."
Her eyes flipped open and she turned her head towards the sound. He was around the corner from her. Something told her not to. Something told her to run as fast and as far as she could and never look back. But of course, she didn't listen. Maybe if she'd known, she would have.
She peeked around the corner and saw him a little ways away standing there. A gorgeous redhead was rubbing up against him like a cat in heat. Jake was trying to move away but wasn't putting any real effort into it. Bella felt even more nauseous at the sight.
"Come on, Jake. You know you want it, baby."
Bella wanted to gag. Had she really just called him that?
He tried to push her away gently again.
"Stop. We agreed. I'm not like that anymore."
"Are you sure?"
He stepped away from her.
"Yes! I'm married. I love my wife."
Victoria laughed a disgusting cackle.
"That's funny. That never stopped you before."
Bella felt the air whoosh out of her lungs. So it was true.
Jake pushed Victoria away again. "Things are different now. I don't want this anymore."
Victoria's hand snaked down. "Really? Because it feels like you want it."
Bella held her hand to her mouth to keep the vomit from rushing up and escaping like it wanted to.
Jake grabbed the girl's wrists and pushed her backward with a little more force this time. "Well, I don't. So hands off. I'm not gonna tell you again."
Victoria laughed once more. Bella wanted to claw at her eardrums when she heard the sickening sound.
"Come on, Jakey. I haven't been able to scream for you in so looongg..."
"Victoria, enough. I'm serious. We're done. I told you that."
Bella could feel her knees wobbling. She was gonna collapse and soon.
Victoria smirked at him. "What, the old 'It's not over until I say it's over' routine again? Baby, we both know you don't really mean it. And that's why you keep coming back for more." Victoria leaned forward and kissed him.
Bella started to shake. Where was New Bella right now when she needed her most?
Jake backed away and pushed her off him.
"Enough!"
Victoria threw her head back and laughed. "Oh please. Save the faithful husband act for someone who actually gives a shit. Now, come here."
She grabbed his face and pulled him down to her, kissing him again. But this time, he didn't push her away.
Bella felt her heart lurch into her stomach. She felt the pain rear its ugly head inside her chest and it only got worse the longer he didn't pull away from the woman in front of him.
Bella gasped from the force of it, not meaning to make the loud sound she did. The two people heard it and turned their heads in her direction. Somehow she managed to duck back behind the wall in time and she quickly made her way to the front of the shed, not caring in the slightest that her heels clicked against the pavement. She slowed down, breathing harshly. She walked to the other side of the shed and squatted down. She removed her shoes as fast as she could and sat there, waiting.
Then she heard his voice again. "I mean it this time, Victoria. No more. I love my wife. So stop calling me, stop trying to see me, stop grabbing me, don't even fucking come near me. You understand me?"
She heard Victoria laugh again but then she heard Jake's voice get further away. "I mean it!"
She chanced a quick glance around the corner, looking towards the party. Jake was practically jogging back inside.
She heard Victoria chuckle again as she began to follow him at a much slower pace. "We'll see, baby. We'll see how long you can resist me. We'll see. Didn't take too long last time and it won't be too long this time. We'll see." She then lit up a cigarette and made her way to the bar near the pool.
Only then did Bella allow herself to get up, her shoes in her hand. She stared up at the party. She couldn't go back in. She couldn't fake it. She couldn't. If she saw him, she would lose it for sure. And then Edward would know. And she couldn't have him know. Ever.
She turned and made her way down the stairs to the beach. Once her toes hit the sand, she allowed herself a quick breath.
From then on, everything was a blur. She didn't remember doing anything, almost like she had been sleepwalking or possessed even. No. She was numb.
Somehow she walked the distance back to the house without tripping once.
Somehow she trudged up the deck steps and had the presence of mind to remember where Ness had told them there was a spare key in case of emergencies. She retrieved it and opened the screen door. She closed the door behind her and locked it.
Somehow she made her way through the kitchen, into the living room and up the stairs. Once she reached the top, she opened Rose and Emmett's door and stepped into the room. She untied the neck tie and unzipped the dress in the back. She took it off her and placed the dress neatly spread out on the bed. She placed the shoes on the floor next to it. She then stepped out of the room and closed the door.
Somehow she walked to hers and Edward's room, opened the door, walked through it and closed the door behind her, locking it. She pulled down her underwear and let it pool to her feet. She stepped out of it and threw it in the trash can near the dresser. She even had the presence of mind to hide the offending fabric underneath some plastic bags already in there. She then walked to the dresser and opened a drawer. She pulled out a fresh pair of black underwear and a black slip of a nightgown. Not something she had planned on wearing but she already felt like she couldn't breathe enough without extra clothing hindering her skin.
She slowly put them on and then walked to the bathroom. She turned the light on, the only light in the dark house, and closed the door behind her, locking it as well. She moved to the shower and turned it on as hot as it would get.
Once it did, she stepped in, not caring that it was burning her skin and that her clothing was getting completely drenched. She moved to the middle of the jet of water and sat down, facing away from the shower head. She brought her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. She buried her head in her arms.
There was no point in washing, in scrubbing. Nothing would ever clean away what she had done. Even the scalding temperature of the water cascading down around her wouldn't be enough.
She didn't move from that position. She didn't move when the water turned cold. She didn't move when she started to shake uncontrollably. She didn't move when her body felt as if it turned to ice, her teeth chattering. She didn't move when she heard her name screamed throughout the house. She knew it was a male voice but she didn't know who it was. And she didn't care.
She didn't move when she heard bangs on the bedroom door outside. She didn't move when she heard one final loud bang and then silence. She didn't move when she heard the knob of the bathroom being tried. She didn't move when she heard the knocking followed by her name. Again a male voice and still she didn't know who it was. And still she didn't care.
She didn't move when she heard the loud bangs of whomever it was throwing their weight against it. She didn't move when she heard the door break open or the horrified yell of her name. She didn't move when she heard the footsteps of several people enter the room. She didn't move when she heard her name called.
The only time she moved is when she felt hands try to pull her from her current position followed by a "Bella, love, you're freezing! Are you trying to get hypothermia? Oh my God!"
She jerked from his touch without lifting her head out of her arms and hissed at him. "D-D-D-Do not-t-t-t t-t-t-ouch-h-h m-m-m-m-me!"
She couldn't let him touch her. She was unclean, dirty, spoiled, rotten, damaged, no good. She had done such shameful, hurtful, dirty things. He could never touch her again. She wasn't good enough for his touch.
Even though he granted her request, she still heard his voice, though. "Bella, love, what's wrong? What happened? Talk to me." She heard the tears evident at the end of his plea but she couldn't feel anything, couldn't move, couldn't look at him. She was no good for him anymore. She had betrayed him and the vows she made to him and she could never undo it. Nothing would ever take this away. Nothing.
Then she heard another pair of footsteps running into the room.
And then she heard his voice.
"Is she alright? What the fuck are you all just standing there for? Get her out of there!"
If she could, she wanted to laugh at the concern he faked in his voice so well. But she couldn't. She couldn't feel a thing.
He was quite the actor, she'd give him that. She'd fell for it hook, line and sinker.
She then felt arms wrap around her again and this time she lost it. She began to thrash wildly, never once removing her head from her arms. "I-I-I-I s-s-said-d d-d-don't-t t-t-touch m-m-m-me!"
The arms held her firmer and she fought even more. "Shh. Shh. Bella, it's Emmett."
She went slack in his arms. "E-E-Emm-m-m-et-t-t-t?"
He cradled her tighter into him. "That's right, sweetheart. Your Emmett. Let's get you out of this thing. Come on."
She didn't fight him, didn't turn herself into him, just sat there, in that same position, never looking up, never moving her head or her arms, shaking badly. She felt him slide his one arm underneath her legs and the other around her body and lift. She knew he had her once she didn't feel the water on her skin anymore.
She heard his voice vibrate throughout his chest. "Rose! Get some towels and blankets and make it quick! She's ice cold and she's shaking pretty bad!"
And then she heard him speak to her softly as he walked with her. "It's okay, Bella. It's okay. I'm here. It's okay, sweetie. Everything's gonna be okay."
She then felt him stop. "All of you stay the fuck away from her, you hear me? If you know what's good for you, you'll stay the fuck away! I'm not fucking around!" And then she heard a door slam shut near her.
A minute later she felt something underneath her. Emmett was putting her down somewhere. She wouldn't look, she couldn't. What if she saw their faces? Wasn't it bad enough she already would for the rest of her life, in her head, under the big stamp of 'Regret'?
"Rose, we've gotta get her undressed and wrapped in some warm dry clothes and blankets. She's shivering pretty badly. Give me her clothes and I'll go downstairs and throw them in the dryer quick and grab her some hot tea or something. If any of those fuckers try to come in here while I'm gone, you yell for me. I'm not putting up with this fucking horseshit any longer. You got me?"
Rose must've agreed because she heard Emmett's loud footsteps walk away, a door open and then slam shut.
Then she felt someone sit on the bed next to her.
"Bella. It's me, Rose. Can I help you get changed, sweetie?"
Bella finally lifted her head and looked up at the blonde woman next to her.
"Y-Y-You kn-n-new, d-d-didn't-t y-y-you?"
Regardless of Bella's stuttering and vague question, Rose knew what she meant. Rose knew what she was asking.
She frowned and looked down, not meeting Bella's eyes. It was the first time Bella had ever seen Rose do that. Ever. In all the time she'd known her. Rose was the most confident, unshakeable, tough woman she knew. It took a lot to intimidate her and no one had been able to yet. But now, right now, when Bella's world was crashing down around her, Rose wasn't able to look her in the eyes.
Rose took a deep breath and closed her eyes. "Yes, Bella. I knew."
Bella's mouth dropped open completely. "A-A-And-d E-Em-m-m-m?"
Rose opened her eyes and nodded once. "That's why he was on his case. That's why he insisted that he tell you himself before tonight."
Rose looked up at her, a sad expression on her face, pity in her beautiful grey eyes. "I'm sorry, Bella."
And then Bella broke.
She didn't even know the mournful wail was coming from her until she saw Rose rush toward her and throw her arms around her. She was sobbing, wheezing for breath, shaking, shivering and crying all at once.
Suddenly, Emmett burst through the door. "Rose, what the fuck happened?"
Rose kissed Bella's wet head and looked up at Emmett.
"She knows."
So many emotions crossed Emmett's face at once that Bella couldn't keep up with them if she wanted to. The one she saw that lasted long enough that she could recognize it was anger.
"How did you find out, Bella?"
She began to cry harder and Rose rocked her back and forth, trying to soothe her. They had all known and they hadn't thought to warn her about any of it. Instead, they gave him more access to her, to hurt her, to turn her into a big pile of shitty nothing.
Emmett approached the bed and kneeled down in front of them. This time he spoke softer.
"Bella. I need to know. Who told you?"
Bella sniffled and sobbed out an answer the best she could. "E-E-Edward-d. Vi-Vi-Vic-toria." The name made her feel sick to her stomach again. She didn't even realize that she had jumped off the bed, ignoring the stabbing pain in her body and ran into their bathroom, throwing herself to her knees in front of the toilet, heaving everything she had in her system from that day.
Rose was right above her, holding her hair back with one hand, rubbing her back with the other. Bella kept her head down, facing the bowl in case anything else decided to make a reappearance. She heard Emmett's voice. It was full of deadly menace.
"Victoria, huh?"
Bella heaved again at just the sound of the name.
Then she heard Emmett's yell get farther away. "I'm gonna fucking kill that piece of shit!"
Then she heard the door slam shut once more and everything went black.