Chapter 11
Selfish Decisions
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It was never in her wildest imaginations that she could ever feel a kind of sensation new to her such as last night. Never did she think of spending the night's sleep so close to someone she didn't consider anymore as just a mere friend. Albeit the possibility that it's one-sided, from the emotions they shared last night, she felt hopeful. The next step is frightening, she knew, risky even. But surprisingly, she felt suicidal for the moment.
Her thoughts lingered in her like a security on patrol, but she was side-tracked as she felt a huge lump beside her. She recognized it was a human body, a man's body to be exact. Natsume to be more specific.
She angled her body towards him, and smiled as she saw another beatific façade. One arm as a pillow, the other clutching the duvet across his belly. Mouth partly opened, and lashes that fanned his eyes. His chest rising softly as he breathed.
She fought the urge to touch every detail on his face, but is pointless anyway. Her hands are just itching to initiate contact.
She carefully raised an arm while reaching out. As soon as the distance was lessened, she brushed the back of her fingers from his cheek, down his jaw. She grinned as she felt soft skin touching hers and continued on sliding her index finger down his nose, and smiled even more. She dared herself to touch more, thus she used her thumb to trace the brows above his closed eyes. She was astonished at how the deed made her feel tingly, marvelling the adequate volume of hair that formed a perfect slanting arch.
And then she went down to his lips. Hesitant at first, but she felt surrendering. She ever gently stroked, tracing it from end to end, top to bottom, and noticed a rather unusual sight.
His lips are pale.
Before she could even show concern, Natsume stirred in his slumber and Mikan instantly shifted back to her sleeping position and shut her eyes.
Natsume slowly opened his eyes, and squinted as light irritated his vision. He inhaled deep, and scanned his surroundings, attempting to stretch his numb arm, but was interrupted by the woman beside her.
He smirked as he finally got to register what was going on, or what happened. He fixed his eyes on the side of her face, marvelling and reminiscing how he captured her lips and hugged her close. He lifted his arms to pinch her cheek and smirked as he felt it was rather plump.
He was even more pleased as he noticed the restlessness of her eyes. Mikan knew how to lie, but she's not a good actress, and what Natsume does causes her heart to palpitate which in turn defies anything she commands her body, even pretending asleep.
"I can tell you're awake, polka-dotted panties girl", he croaked.
Mikan's eyes shot wide open, and quickly turned her face to glower at him.
"Did you molest me in my sleep?!"
"What? I didn't, and I won't. If I was to molest somebody, I'd always go for the hot ones", he said hoarsely.
"Hot ones, huh. That still doesn't change the fact that you peeped, you perverted deranged monkey!", she scoffed, now sitting up to give power to her rants, and felt a bit hurt not being included in the 'hot ones' Natsume wanted to molest, not that she want to be.
"I thought we're done with monkeys from last night?"
Mikan blushed, shaking off the memory on the couch. "Don't change the subject."
"Fine I won't. But let me just add one important thing: it wasn't my fault your underwear is clear underneath my polo."
Mikan flushed even more, "E-even so, you peeked!"
"I told you already. I didn't peep, you showed it to me."
Mikan opened her mouth to fire her counterattack, but later opted to stop the opportunity of embarrassing herself more. Besides, she can't formulate a powerful retort, not when she's arguing with Natsume.
"I-I'll just go toast some waffles..", and she exited from the room, heading towards the fridge.
She hurriedly poured the batter on the waffle iron, and another to the pan with butter. She fried bacons and eggs, and started the coffee maker. After half an hour ransacking his kitchen, she set the table near the glass wall facing the city clothed in early sun's light. As soon as she draped the apron back to the rack, she saw from the farthest corner of the cupboard, piles of about a box of medicine bottles.
Natsume on the other hand, finished his bath and started towards the kitchen. He eagerly grabbed a chair and sat down, utensils at the ready, and instead of having a hungry face, he plastered a sceptical look.
"Is this poisoned?"
"Of course not! ", she growled and continued her recent discovery, "What are these Natsume?", grabbing one plastic bottle above.
Natsume rose up and placed the bottle back to the cupboard, "My vitamins. Ruka sent them, we like to keep in shape."
"So, are you in shape?" Mikan challenged, though she already know the answer.
Natsume shrugged and tugged the hem of his shirt and raised it high enough to show those manly lumps on his abdomen. He was not the sporty-built type, but he has that body that is ideal to every woman's taste.
He smirked as he saw the startled look on Mikan's face. So like him, she's also controlled by the dictates of hormones. After all, she is a mass of hormones.
Mikan flushed, and nodded approvingly, "Y-yeah, you're in shape."
God!
"Le-let's just eat", she continued, stealing glances on his stomach.
As soon as they finished their breakfast, they hurriedly prepared to leave. Tomorrow's the launch and Mikan's got a big day ahead of her. So to save time, she decided to take a bath and use her clothes from last night, and just grab new clothes when they're back at her place. She was in a hurry, but she still managed to allot time to marvel at his shower gels and aftershaves. The fact that they'll have the same scent didn't bother her that much. In fact, she liked it; her and Natsume sharing almost all utilities. There's something domestically romantic about it that she's certain Natsume also noticed.
Natsume pulled up in front of her apartment, just for her to change clothes. After a short while she came back wearing a breezy outfit: a blouse tucked behind a floral skater skirt, both made of thin fabric.
Natsume eyed her from head to toe as she settled on her seat and grinned, "You really like it when I see your undies huh?"
A vein popped in Mikan's head and she answered, "I'm not showing my underwear to you! Also, these may be thin, but I made sure it's free from perverted eyes like yours."
"Alright, alright, I won't fry your head. And yes, they're not revealing…", he assured her and continued by murmuring "But I can still visualize."
"What?"
"Nothing, I just commented on the sidewalk's new paint" he answered lazily.
Mikan cocked her head side by side, "Where?"
Seeing her innocent look, Natsume grinned and rolled his eyes as he muttered under his breath, "Stupid."
As expected, Yukihira Co's manpower all concentrated on the event tomorrow, though not as occupied as the Creatives and designers. Mikan, as the head, carries a checklist of the things needed. She double-checked the stage, the programme, guest lists, dresses, press, etc. She had no break time, or any free time to even go to the comfort room and re-touch, or entertain casual conversations. She didn't even have time to drink the latte Natsume gave her.
Natsume thought she might be exhausted and could use some refreshment, thus he bought two lattes from the nearest café. He was asked to help in the preparations since he's Kazumi's partner, and a shareholder of the company. He carried two cups and went straight towards Mikan who's now rushing in every direction to attend to almost every concern from different departments.
"Mikan. Here", he said as he approached her.
"Thank you very much Natsume, but I really have no time to drink that, or if I could somehow manage to snatch a minute, that'll be cold by then", she apologetically said and continued, "But thanks anyway," and kissed him on the cheek before running towards the stage directors.
Natsume smirked at the gesture, and walked back to his temporary office still carrying the cups in his hands. Coincidentally, Narumi was headed the same way and the two met halfway. Narumi noticed the untouched latte in Natsume's hand and suggested on having it instead.
"Nice timing Natsume-kun, I'm very thirsty", he said attempting to grab the cup, but Natsume jerked his hand away right before Narumi could even touch it.
"Oh? That belongs to no one right?" Narumi asked, disappointed.
"Um, I'm sorry but… I own 'em. I drink two cups ", he countered. He doesn't want anybody touching stuffs that he bought exclusively for Mikan, not even her uncle, hence he had no choice but drink the two lattes. He brushed past him as he alternately sipped the cups and leaving the downed Narumi behind.
The day passed by without them noticing, and the sky was gradually covered with dark blue clouds. This signals their work is done, and so the employees concluded their operations and went straight back home. Mikan stretched both her arms and yawned as she made a quick recap in her checklist. Seeing all the boxes checked she hurriedly went downstairs.
Natsume dropped her at the usual spot, and drove back home. They needed their strengths for tomorrow's event thus they no longer made room for arguments, head-frying conversations and the like, and just concentrated on the launch. Tomorrow was Mikan's crowning moment, and Natsume's introduction to the press, and so they both made sure they'll be at their best.
Sunday morning, Mikan agreed on changing at Hotaru's place. Sumire, Hotaru, Anna and Nonoko were invited, and the girls were busy doing their mani's and pedi's and other girly stuffs. The four had white night gowns as the theme required, and were curling their hairs. Hotaru opted on wearing a daring attire; a v-neck plunging neckline A-line satin dress, with sequins showered monochromatically below the hemline. Mikan approved her look, with a little 'naughty' edge to it; unusual for Hotaru's attitude.
Nonoko and Anna both wore a dip hem cocktail; only the designs and neckline were different. Sumire wore a backless halter mermaid dress with a shawl covering her bare back. As a fashion designer, Mikan added jewelleries and other nicks to give more powerful impact on their dresses.
At around 5 pm, the limousine was now ready to fetch them. On cue, the girls descended down the staircase as if they're princesses and gracefully scooted inside the limo.
Natsume and Ruka didn't take long in grooming themselves. Both had white tuxedos and shoes, and feeling contented by their looks, drove towards Yukihira Co.
The place was packed with guests, press and fashion critiques, prancing their white dresses around. The candle-lit tables with white mantle, and the crystal chandelier that rose few feet above them, gave the place an elegant edge. In front of them was a huge runway for the models to strut, lined with lights and decorations, as well as the camera-men.
Not long after all the guests arrived, the event was opened by Hiashi and the entrance of the models. The theme for this line is Autumn; colourful dresses with autumn shades.
The first few models displayed a sequin and beaded dress that has been worked in a diagonal chequer-board pattern of multi colours, folkloric and boho prints, as well as painterly effects. Everywhere the models went, the camera follows, noting every detail of the dress. The second batch wore a loosely knitted dress with fur trimmed hems that almost looked like cashmere in winter. This served as an introduction for the winter's next fashion trend. More models displayed the company's designer clothes until the last batch presented a line that reflects autumn: bright colors of tomato red to iris purple shades.
As the models walked across the runway, flickers of cameras blinded their visions, and the loud applause of the audience plugged their ears. When the various batches already had their chance of being displayed, the host beamed from his microphone the names of the designers, as well as the head designer, Mikan. The artists in white made their way towards the center stage and the clappings increased. Mikan had a different entrance; the backdrop parted slowly, and out Mikan went.
From afar, Natsume's lips parted and astonishment crowded his eyes. Ruka noticed his being immobile, and smiled as he saw his best friend was swept off his feet.
She wore a one-strapped A-line chiffon dress, with a long slit on the left side. Black embroidery topped with Swarovski crystals hugged half her curves from the strap down to where the slit starts. The flowy floor-length dress complemented her smoky eyes and French braid updo, and the crystal jewelry finished her outfit.
After Mikan's message and Natsume's introduction to the mass, the next segment of the program took place: dancing. And so the crowd searched for their partners, and are eager to waltz across the marble floor, and to be serenaded with a romantic symphony from the band.
Amidst the white throng scattered randomly, Ruka shoved his way towards a statuesque lady sipping a punch, in hopes of getting a partner. It was Hotaru. Surprised, Ruka sheepishly smiled, and felt a bit disappointed that it was her, but somehow he was stunned by her innate beauty. Boldly he offered his hand to Hotaru who eyed it sceptically, but later took it and let herself be pulled towards the center.
Few steps away from the center, Natsume was impishly smirking as he saw Mikan gaining distance towards him. Every move and step Mikan makes, the dress gracefully follows, as well as Natsume's breath hitching. He looked down and saw a familiar view; the slit opened the dress to show one toned leg of Mikan and Natsume's becoming edgier every time she steps.
"You look very stunning", he stated all the while eyeing her from head to toe.
"So are you."
Mikan approved how he maneuvered his outfit. He wore a knitted black turtle neck top covered with a gray vest and a tuxedo. He brushed his hair upward, but still leaving the natural ruggedness that greatly added to his masculinity. His stud was now visible, and surprisingly it complements his attitude. Instead of tucking a black napkin inside his pocket square, he placed the handkerchief Mikan gave (or he stole) inside.
Mikan chuckled as she saw the floral designs on her hanky and assured him that he hadn't disobeyed any fashion norm by his act. In fact, she liked it how he seemed to look a lot different, not to mention hotter, than anybody else in the place.
Natsume snaked his arm around Mikan's waist and pulled her close as he said, "May I have this dance?"
The sudden act made Mikan mount both her hands on Natsume's shoulder and chuckled as she replied, "Don't make me fall pervert."
"Don't worry, I won't let you fall anywhere or to anyone. Only to me", he whispered on Mikan's ears only and the two waltzed around, following a rhythm they instinctively know.
Mikan was smiling irrationally as she leaned closer on Natsume's chest, feeling contented and just happy. The way his arms locked around her made her feel secure and cared; the kind of feeling that should be given by her father, the kind of feeling she hadn't felt before. She noticed some girls are giving Natsume a flirty gesture, and she immediately hugged him tighter, giving them a 'he's mine' look. She closed her eyes as she savoured the moment, not wanting it to end. She smiled for the second time as she pondered why she was given something as wonderful as this, as wonderful as him. But she immediately opened her eyes as she remembered this did not come free.
She made a bargain.
Natsume held her as if it's his first time. As usual, her curves taunt him, inviting him to never take his hands off them. He took the upper hand in directing wherever they go, and he felt utterly contented knowing Mikan placed her trust in him. Her lithe body looked so fragile in his hold that he felt almost over-protective, not wanting others to touch, look, or hurt her without his consent. The way he held her made it clear to people especially to those who had interest on Mikan, that he doesn't share, and that this person belonged to him entirely. In fact, he glared to every male that attempts to exchange partners with him. He grinned as he thought that this was his first time, and he's unworthy of feeling something as wonderful as this, of having something as wonderful as her. A thought then halted his smile: he made a bargain.
.
"I asked her on a date", Natsume said as he and Ruka took their tuxedos.
"That's good. What'd she say?"
"Nothing", Natsume shrugged.
"Just give her some time… I told you so,"
"Told me what?"
"That you're serious in her."
Natsume scoffed, "I-uh-well… Never mind, I'll just cancel it."
"Don't. I know you want to."
"Ruka I can't."
For a moment they were silenced, and then Ruka asked "Do you like her?"
Natsume pressed his lips together and sighed, "Yes. I mean she's clumsy, fragile, stupid, innocent, and…"
"Then be with her."
"You know I can't."
Ruka no longer pushed Natsume into admitting something he already know, and know he isn't capable of. But he's also certain that Natsume's state of mind is somewhat changed and that he could do things he hasn't done before, especially if it's for Mikan. He might not know what's in Mikan that made Natsume become a risk-taker, but it can be said in this aspect, that he saw it coming first.
Meanwhile, Hotaru and Mikan were having a serious conversation while the others were busy painting their nails.
"How's our plan?" Hotaru asked.
"Hotaru… I don't think I can…"
"What?! Don't tell me you've fallen for him?"
"He's not what you think. He's different."
"I've heard that one before… Look Mikan, I'm just concerned of you. Have you forgotten how unstable your heart is in matters like this?"
"I-I-I know, but I really like him Hotaru. "
"You liked those guys you left too! You told me they're different, and then the next thing I know your feelings for them are gone, and you feel sorry for yourself for being like that."
Hotaru paused for a while before continuing, "Look, I'm your best friend, I don't want you to feel that again. But if you really want to be with him then I'm not stopping you. Just don't forget your capabilities."
Both were silent, not wanting to increase the pressure.
"I don't want to hurt him", Mikan said.
"I don't want to hurt her", Natsume finally said.
"But," Natsume continued.
"I want him. Can't I at least want him?" Mikan thoughtfully asked.
"Yes you can, and that would be very stupid", Hotaru said.
"Then I'll just be stupid."
"You said that would be foolish Natsume."
"Then I'll just be a fool."
"For once… I'll just be selfish." Natsume and Mikan concluded.
They both knew they're about to enter a dangerous territory, but somehow deep inside them, they saw a tiny hint of hope that this might turn out well. Although both are just concerned for the other, they bargained it for their happiness. It was selfish yes, but it's only their way of keeping their sanity intact. A famous person once said that happiness and sanity is an impossible combination, but surprisingly it worked for them. After all, they're just mere humans, capable of hurting and be hurt, love and be loved. They can only hope that they'll not regret anything they've decided that moment.
Natsume pulled her tighter, and Mikan hugged him more. Through that gesture they hoped to show their apology, even just slightly. Unknown to the two, they both decided on the same thing.
"I'll go on a date with you."
"What?"
Mikan chuckled, "I said, I'll go on a date with you."
"Oh…" Natsume grinned, "I though that's what you said".
"I don't want it to be an ordinary date okay?" Mikan reminded him, though it's just her teasing him.
"Is that a challenge?"
"Do your worst, lover boy", she winked.
Natsume didn't respond, instead he rested his chin on her forehead, but was surprised as a flicker disturbed his eyes. He immediately loosened his grip on Mikan and distanced himself in a casual way. One of the presses just stole a photo of them with bodies so close.
Mikan noticed his sudden uneasiness, and assured him, "Don't worry, we have Hotaru to clear any images on the net."
Having said that, Natsume resumed his recent position and continued not minding the camera near them. They continued waltzing across the floor, not giving a care for other people dancing, or the irritating press, or the sudden stopping of the music.
End of chapter 11
AN:
This one is shorter than I expected.. TT But I updated didn't I? :D
Anyway, how can I say 'thank you' to all those who reviewed, favorite-ed and alerted this story? I just.. I.. well.. Thank you, very much!
Also, I can't reach out to these guys, so I'll just send my msg for them thru here..
nix: You!... just don't know when to stop making my day wonderful do you? :D Thank you!
aira: Thank you so much, and yes I won't stop until this is over.. ;)
yeyey: I hope i can update faster too.. :'( school stuffs are hard nowadays. But I'll make sure I'll update every month. Thanks anyway!
aim: haha, I never planned to make this mysterious, but well, thank you for noticing that.
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