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Chapter 3

He pulled the arrow back a little bit more, concentrating on the target. The feathers brushed against his cheek and he inhaled deeply, holding his breath and letting go of the arrow.

Bull's eye.

But he didn't even wait a second, reaching for another arrow in his quiver and shooting all of them on the same target. But it still wasn't enough. The anxiety was still sizzling through his veins and he contemplated if he should go on the training round he had built for himself and his men.

Maybe the exhaustion would help him relax because his mind was driving him nuts. He could see her everywhere, her voice whispering his name in his ear and when he closed his eyes he could always feel her. Her fingers trailing along his neck, down his stomach, wrapping firmly around him, her lips caressing his ear as she breathed 'Take me'.

"Bloody hell." He cursed loudly, reaching down and adjusting his pants, alone the thought of her making him half hard.

He stomped towards the target and yanked the arrows out, shoving them back into his queue, his jaw muscle jumping as he gritted his teeth.

He couldn't even go to her in battle. When they had fought the giant snow man, when they had gone after Elsa. He could only protect her, couldn't hold her afterwards, couldn't make sure she was okay. He had called out her name once, in warning. But something in his voice must have betrayed him because Marian had been looking at him strangely, her brows furrowing before the battle around them had claimed her attention again.

He was losing it. Marian suspected something. He knew she did. He defended Regina every time she brought her up. He just couldn't help it. They had had more than one fight about it. Fights that ended in them yelling at each other and slamming doors. Fights that ended in him wanting desperately to go to her, to lose himself in her, to find solace in her arms.

She was his soul mate. And every minute he spent without her by his side something inside of him died and he wondered how long it would take until he was only a hollow shell, until he had lost all ability to truly feel because he couldn't live without her but he couldn't live with her either and it was killing him inside.

-/-

She always fled into the forest when it just got too much. The wind rustling through the trees, soothing her mind even though the smell reminded her of him. Probably one of the reasons she sought solace there.

Just sitting on a fallen tree and closing her eyes, brought him nearer and she almost expected to see him sitting beside her when she opened her eyes, with this small smirk on his face and the adoration and love shining out of his eyes.

But of course he didn't. He was never sitting beside her because he wasn't supposed to be sitting beside her. He wasn't allowed to spend time with her. She couldn't allow it.

The stolen glances were bad enough. She couldn't talk to him. It would just break her, and she wouldn't let that happen. As long as she could keep her distance the pain was bearable, always there, simmering inside of her, but manageable.

Standing up, she walked slowly through the forest, letting her fingers trail over the leaves, inhaling the scent of the moist vegetation around her, forgetting for just a few seconds her sorrows.

She heard a warning shout and turned around just in time to catch the arrow in midair, her heart slamming against her rib cage as she recognized it immediately. It was one of his arrows.

She wasn't surprised. Not really. A part of her had always hoped she would stumble over him like it had happened so often in the past.

Turning around slowly, she met his eyes, a sharp pain stabbing her right in the chest and she couldn't keep herself from walking over to him as if he was drawing her towards him with magic.

"Regina, I ..." His soft voice shot shivers down her spine, made her heart crack and she lifted her hand, putting her fingers against his lips.

"Don't say anything."

She stepped closer, wrapped her arms around him and leaned into him. He hesitated only a second before his arms came around her, his head dropping on hers and she just breathed him in.

For just a few moments she wouldn't fight the urge to be near him. For just a few seconds she would relish being in his arms again. Something her body and soul had ached for since the moment Marian reappeared in his life.

He smelled like forest. Like he had always smelled and a lonely tear slipped out of under her eyelashes as she tilted her head just a fraction so that her lips skimmed over his skin, the contact making the longing in her body intensify and she wanted to stay like this forever.

"I miss you." She whispered, pushing out of his embrace before she would do something really stupid. She turned around and walked away, stopping at the edge of the clearing, not looking at him as she spoke over her shoulder, seeing only a glimpse of him out of the corner of her eye. "I miss you so much, Robin."

He couldn't breathe. His skin was tingling were her lips had brushed against him, his chest was aching with longing and he stepped forward, wanted to go after her, wanted to haul her into his arms and never let her go again. But he couldn't.

This wasn't working. It was not working. They were hurting.

He stumbled to a fallen log and slumped down on it, burying his head in his hands, a sob ripping through his throat as he clenched his fingers into his hair.

It had been three months and he had tried so hard to forget her. To live his life as if he had never met her. But she was part of him and he couldn't get her out of his head.

His body was shaking with sobs and for a second he wished Regina could just rip his heart out and make him hurt less. He didn't know what to do. It wasn't working. He was hurting Marian. He was hurting Regina. He was hurting himself. It had to stop. He needed to find a way to make it stop.