Chapter 26

When Cuddy arrived at her place, House was there, waiting for her. He watched her coming to him smiling. Cuddy wasn't very surprised to find him there. In fact, she hoped he would be there.

"What do you want, House?"

"You left a message on my voicemail, you wanted to see me, so here I am."

Cuddy opened the door and House followed her inside.

"I wanted you to call me as soon as you got my message, I never asked you to come at my place." She replied and looked at him. She'd like him to take her in his arms, she needed to be in his arms but she just said: "I'm tired, House. Why are you here? What do you want?"

"My hotel room isn't really nice. I don't like the wallpaper and the food isn't good."

"Oh really? I didn't know that you pay attention to the wallpaper."

"I need to talk to you. And I feel alone in my room. Two good reasons to come to you, don't you think so?"

"Yes, I think we have lots of things to talk about." She replied and stared at him. He held her gaze. They remained so a few seconds and Cuddy asked: "Why didn't you tell me that you applied for the job? I've probably be taken for a fool by Barrow!"

"Oh you're used to it."

"House! I signed a contract in which I accepted to have no contact with you, it was the deal. Barrow will probably fire me now. But as usual you only thought about yourself!"

"Hey! It's not my fault if this job was made for me. And I have nothing more to prove. They need me. And…" House looked at Cuddy and smiled. Then he added: "And they are not the only one I guess."

"Oh and who needs you? May I know?"

"You know it. That's why you wrote this memo. To be sure that no other doctor will fit with the job except me." House said smiling.

She rolled her eyes. "Yes, the hospital is not at its best and you are more than welcome in this situation. But you should have told me!"

"Why? What would you have done?"

"I… I don't know. Maybe I would have talked with Barrow and the board management and tried to convince them that the hospital needs you and your name and"

"And they would have said no because of our… past. And they would have then had no other choice than fire you."

"House! How can you say that! I'm sure we could have found an agreement."

"Oh yes, of course. Another stupid contract which would have stipulated that we wouldn't be allowed to talk to each other neither looked at each other or anything else as stupid as having sex in the examination room!"

Cuddy looked at him with a funny face. "Is that one of your fantasy? Really?"

"It happened in every medical soaps." Cuddy rolled her eyes.

"Do you have something to eat? I'm hungry."

"The kitchen is here. Help yourself." She replied and smiled.

"Do you want something?"

"No, thank you." She sat down on the sofa.

After a few minutes, House came back, a sandwich in the hand. He sat next to Cuddy.

"By the way, don't worry for your job. Barrow won't fire you."

Cuddy looked at him upset. "House, tell me you didn't make a deal with him." House didn't answer. "Oh no, House! What did you do?"

"Hey keep calm, nothing illegal. Barrow needs me and I need you. That's it. Nothing more."

"Thank you" she whispered and rubbed her eyes.

"Long day?"

"Yes." She sighed.

"And?"

"And what?"

"Cuddy, I know when something worries you, and you're worried. Or no, you're not worried." "You feel bad." He added staring at her.

"Yes, I feel bad. Happy?"

"If you feel bad because you finally dumped your stupid surgeon, then yes, I'm happy."

"How how do you know that I dumped him tonight?"

"If not, where would have you been? You left the hospital before me." Cuddy looked at him. This man would always surprise her. House swallowed a piece of sandwich and added: "And now that I'm officially here… it would have been very difficult to keep on dating him."

"I feel bad because I broke his heart and I'm not sad, on the contrary I feel relieved." House looked at her but said nothing. "House, do you think I'm a bitch?"

House almost choked. "Seriously? You want me to answer?" he replied with a funny face.

Cuddy looked at him: "No, you're right, don't answer. Forget the question, it was stupid."

"Not sexy enough"

"What?"

"Your underwear is not sexy enough."

Cuddy looked at him amazed. "What? What are you talking about? How do you know that my underwear isn't sexy? Did you see it?"

"It's black." Cuddy stared at him, amazed. "Nice but you have sexier underwear." Cuddy still looked at him puzzled. "The lace red one… yes, I think it's my favorite. With this one you can be a bitch." House said and licked his thumb.

"House…"

"Cuddy, you would have been a bitch if you had let him believe that you loved him, if you had let him learn of me by his colleagues. You two don't work, too bad for him, he will probably find another one. There are lots of stupid women who love surgeon. Don't worry about him, he will get over you."

"Do you mean that I'm stupid?!"

"Hu, let me think… Sometimes."

Cuddy smiled. And House smiled too. It was good to banter.

"Well, I'm gonna go to my hotel. You need to sleep. Thanks for the sandwich."

"You're welcome."

"Maybe we can have lunch tomorrow?"

"Yes, with pleasure."

As House stood up he noticed a picture of two children. He recognized Rachel but the little boy…

"Who is it?"

"Who?"

"Here on the picture, next to Rachel?"

"It's… it's Ethan" Cuddy mumbled verging on panic.

"And who is Ethan?" House asked intrigued by Cuddy's reaction.

"It's … it's… House, I…" She got up and wringed her hands.

"Cuddy, tell me, who is Ethan? Why are you suddenly… embarrassed?" House said and took the picture in his hand to look at it better. This little boy reminded him of someone.

"I should have told you, I wanted to tell you but…"

"Who is Ethan, Cuddy?" House repeated and came next to her. His face was a few centimeters away from Cuddy's, she could feel his breathe.

"It's our son." She whispered.

"Our son?!" House repeated flabbergasted. "Our son!"

"Yes."

"Why why don't you tell me? Why did you …? How? Why?"

"House, I… you drove in my dining-room, you "

"Why don't you tell me?" House shouted.

"Because you could have killed us! Because I didn't want to hear about you anymore! Because you were in jail! What do you think House? Do you think it was easy for me?"

"Are you sure he's mine? 'cause if I remembered you were dating another guy."

"No, House, I wasn't dating this stupid friend of Julia! Ethan is your son, no doubt about it!"

House looked at her and whispered: "I… I need to think about all this." Then he walked to the door and opened it.

"No, House, please, don't go away, I"

But House left Cuddy alone. She saw him walking away wondering where he was going, who he was going to meet, what he was going to take. She worried about him.

Ooooooooo

House couldn't believe it. He was father! He had a son. A son. And the mother of his son was Cuddy, the woman he loved since so long. Another bond between them, a bond which no one could ever break. They were the parents of a little boy. Why didn't she tell him? Because she thought he would be a bad father? Probably. She took time before she introduced Rachel to him. She said she had to protect her. After all, House was screwed up, he was a junky, cynical, pitiless with stupid people, and he could be violent. She certainly wanted to protect his son. Ethan. He liked the name. But now what? He got the job but this unexpected brought chaos to his plan. What about him and Cuddy? Could they go back together? Should they go back together? And how? Should they tell Ethan that House was his father? How would the little boy react? Would he be afraid of House? Would he like him? And what would happen if Ethan didn't like House? What would happen if House couldn't take on the fact that he had a son? Would he be able to love Ethan? A son… House had walked absent minded. He stood now in front of a bar. They were lots of people watching a baseball match. There was a lot of hustle and bustle. House found a place at the bar and ordered a whisky. He looked at all the people around him, together to watch a baseball match on TV. Would he share some passions with his son? Would his son like monster trucks? Would he accept to attend a show with his father and pretended he liked it? Like Wilson did. Wilson! Did you know for Ethan? Why didn't you tell me about him? Why didn't you tell me that I was father? Did Cuddy tell you? I should ask her. It's ironical. I never had any kind of relationship with my father and now I'm father. But what will happen if I'm a bad father? What if I did the same mistakes as my father did with me? Will Cuddy forgive me? House drank many whiskies and his head was spinning. Because of the alcohol and because of all the thoughts that crossed his mind. What should he do? Be a man and accept his responsibilities as father, accept to have a son and to love him, take on his education or walk away to protect Ethan from him, walk away to give his son the chance to live without a bad father, to be happy? Because House found it hard to be happy, it wasn't something natural to him. He always ended to ruin everything that made him happy. And what about Cuddy? What about his love for her? What about their love? Because he knew that she still loved him. Would they manage to live altogether? Would they manage to be a family? But did he want to have a family? Was he able to have a family? Too many thoughts, too many questions. House was tired. The match was over and the people in the bar were happy because their team won. The bar owner paid his round and House drank another whisky. It was time to face the reality and to go back to Cuddy. They had to talk, he needed more explanation. He asked the barman his way to Cuddy's place and staggered to the door.

"Hey, do you have a car?" the barman asked him.

House turned around: "No, just my feet."

"It's a long way for someone in your state. Wait a minute. Hey, Joe, are you going home?" A tall man with a red shirt and a baseball cap nodded. "Can you drive him? He's too drunk to walk home. He lives in your neighborhood." Joe gave a look at House and took him to his car.

"You're lucky. My team won, I'm in a good mood. Give me your address."

House restrained himself from replying something unpleasant because he needed to be driven to Cuddy. He wasn't sure to find his way in the night and with all the alcohol in his blood.