CHAPTER 3

Comments are always welcome. I aim to please!

Katherine's Diary: Entry 6

This past week has been a stressful week. I've made at least twenty chocolate runs to the store down the block, sometimes even appearing more than once a day. Anyway, I had the piano replaced on Wednesday, but didn't have the heart to touch it.

I've gotten no calls from Hayley, which is a good sign because it means that she's dead. Still, now I have no spies in that area. I'm literally blind to all the shit that happens in Mystic Falls, and a lot of important shit goes down there. But maybe I should call Hayley, just to make sure that she's dead. It's not good to leave a loose end just tied. You have to double knot that shit. Wait. I said shit like three times. Make that four. Shit.

But who gives a shit about Hayley? What about Elijah, you might ask?

Okay, so here's the deal. I've been avoiding him. I know, I know.

Ever since the kiss, it's been completely awkward between us. He's pretending like it never happened, which I'm okay with, but I'm not. I know, I'm even confusing myself! Like I don't want to talk about it with him, but at the same time, I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE DAMN KISS.

We say good morning, we have our training session we Gavin until three, and then we avoid each other until nighttime. HE HASN'T MENTIONED A SINGLE THING! It's been driving me crazy. Does he care? Does it really matter to him? I don't even know if it matters to me. God, my life is so confusing. And just when I think I have things all figured out, daydreams of Mr. Fancy Pants come back and haunt me. Seriously. Why is he so freaking hot? I can't think about it right now. I'm literally fanning myself and breaking a sweat just thinking about him without a shirt on…

I'm pretty sure that this isn't healthy. I need therapy.

But things have gotten better! Trust me, there was no sarcasm there.

"We need to talk." I immediately winced at my choice of words. But I couldn't help it! All this dancing around and beating around the bush was exhausting! I motioned him to sit beside me on the couch, and he approached cautiously. "For god sakes, Elijah, I'm not going to bite. Now sit!"

"What do you want to talk about?" he asked stubbornly. God, he was so annoying. There it was! Did you see you it? It was a freaking smile! Seriously, I admired the effort to contain it, but I just wanted to slap him in the face.

"You're not going to make this easy, are you?"

"Nope."

"You know…." I said, drawing out the words.

"The kiss," he finished for me. I nodded. "What about it?" WHAT ABOUT IT? He's lucky he's cute, or else I totally would have wiped that stupid smile off his stupid face. I crossed my legs, glaring at him.

"You know perfectly well about it!" I yelled, slapping him playfully on the arm. "You were on the other end on said kiss. And you've been avoiding talking about said kiss for days!"

"Me? I've been avoiding you?" He shook his head. "I'm sorry, my dear Katarina, but you are mistaken. I believe that you have been avoiding me."

Crap. Was it that obvious?

I fiddled around with my shoelaces before looking up. "Well…"

"Well?" He prompted.

"Would it be possible…" He raised on eyebrow at me. God. I don't think I can do it. Relax. Breathe. Just spit it out.

"Katarina," he sighed. "Honesty, remember? I think you would do well to remember-"

"Time," I blurted out. It felt so good to finally be free of that horrid word, but I immediately regretted it the minute Elijah's beautiful face turned sour.

"Time? I do not understand." I started to fidget nervously. How could I explain this? I honestly couldn't remember the last time I'd been this stressed. In fact, I couldn't remember the last time I'd been stressed period.

And he looked so sad. I don't understand. Is it possible to fear him and pity him at the same time? And how could I make him sad? It's not like he cared or anything. Wait. Shit. No, it's not possible. Nope. He's obviously playing me, trying to get me to spill. Well sorry, Mr. Fancy Pants. You ain't going to win me over that easily. But still, two can play this game, I think. Maybe? I don't know. WHY CAN'T I THINK STRAIGHT?

"I mean that I need some…space," I clarified cautiously. How was he going to react? I held my breath for what seemed like forever before he nodded. "And I have some conditions," I continued.

"Conditions?" He raised an eyebrow at me suspiciously.

"Yea. You know, rules and guidelines." I paused. "Number one." Shit. I struggled to think. I really should have thought this through. How many should I make? Two? Three? Three seems fair. "No more talking about the kiss, or anything, until I say so, okay? It's too stressful, and I bite my nails. Look!" I show him my fingers. "My nails are stubs!" He looks mildly amused at this.

"I must say, Katarina, you're nails are truly hideous." I glared at him. "Number two?"

"Yea, yea. Number two." I paused to think again. "Okay. Number two. You can't avoid me anymore when you're upset." He goes to interrupt, but I stop him. "And in return, I won't avoid you. Honesty, remember? We tell each other what we think to avoid that." I motioned at the wall Elijah had punched earlier. He looked sheepishly to the ground. "And three, there's no more awkwardness. Whatever we have, whatever you want to call it, I don't want it to get between us. I want us to still be friends, no matter what happens. Got it?" He stays quiet, thinking silently.

"I agree to your terms," he says quietly, "but have a few conditions of my own." I sigh loudly, but nod. It's only fair that he set some boundaries as well. "One, you can't see anyone else. Not until we settle our differences." Hmmm. Crap. But I guess I could manage…

"I think I can live with that. And two?" I ask. He breathes in deeply before continuing.

"You can't run away." He takes my face in between his hands. "I spent 500 years chasing you, waiting for an answer. I won't spend another 500 years waiting to see if you return my affections." I stared into his eyes, trying to determine his true intentions. Was he serious? Or was this all a game? Finally, I nodded.

"Okay," I managed. He gets off the couch and turns to leave, but stops.

"And another thing, Katarina. Why?"

"Why what?" I ask hoarsely.

"This time? Why do you need it? And how long do you plan to keep me waiting? I won't wait forever." He looked down at the floor. I paused to think.

"Well," I replied slowly. "Like the kiss? What does it mean? What does any of this mean?" I motioned around wildly. "How can I rush into something like this?" I rubbed my temples. "I just need to think. I need time to think. And I don't know how much time I'll need, but I promise that I won't leave without letting you know, okay?" I looked up at him. "You have my word." He looked back at me before replying.

"And you have mine." He leaves to change but I stop him.

"Elijah?"

"What?"

"The kiss was real," I say softly. "I promise. It wasn't part of some master plot that I cooked up. It was me, but I'm not sure what it means." I look away. "I'm not sure what anything means anymore."

So there you have it. Feel better now? I know I don't. Right now, I just need to think…actually, I need chocolate.

Where is Fancy Pants and his stupid presents when you need them?

Headcount of the word "shit": 8 (including the one I just said)

Shit. I need to work on my language. ARRGGG!

New headcount: 9

Crap. (See what I did there? Ha! I got a new word besides… the four letter "S" word now)

Elijah needed to sit and think for a while. The conversation had been necessary, but had raised more questions than answers. Time? The concept was so foreign to him. Hadn't he waited long enough? Wait. What was he thinking? This was Katarina Petrova, the girl who used lies and trickery to get what she wanted. Still, he hadn't sensed any deception in her words. Katarina had been telling the truth about the kiss. But what if he wanted to believe her?

First of all, she hadn't yet revealed her true feelings for him. If the kiss was as real as she claimed, why would she need time? Katarina insisted on time, for whatever purpose. He couldn't help but wonder what she truly needed this time for. Again, she hadn't admitted that she loved him, nor had she confessed that she hated him. What was that third condition? That they remain friends? If anything, the last thing Elijah had in mind was friendship. He wanted courtship, but it troubled him to admit that he wanted to court…her.

His family was scattered. He was lonely. She was there. To be honest, Elijah couldn't really be blamed for his current circumstances. It had taken a long time to even admit to himself that maybe, just maybe, he still had feelings for her. But thinking back, all the secrecy surrounding the girl was starting to make his love for her wither. Katarina demanded time and his trust, but how can he trust her when she wouldn't even open up? Trust had to be earned, and so far, he had yet any proof of her valor. In fact, her trip to New Orleans, combined with her lies, had further convinced him that something was wrong.

Besides, Katarina had been the source of conflict between him and his brother Klaus. She had left Elijah and hadn't looked back, forcing him to face the wrath of Klaus alone. It was a pattern, really. She runs away at the first sign of trouble. Stefan and Damon had been abandoned, and so had he. The current situation begged the question, "Why hadn't she disappeared yet?" The only answer was that she still needed something from him. Elijah was determined not to give her anything, no matter what his feelings might tell him.

"Love is a vampire's greatest weakness," Klaus had once told him. For many centuries, Elijah had thought the same way. Until the day he met Katarina.

"If you do not believe in love, why would you want to live?" Katarina's words had haunted him for days. But when she left, his brother's words echoed in his mind instead. Elijah had loved her, and it had been his greatest weakness. If he hadn't been so blind, Klaus would have been rid of the curse that had plagued him for centuries. And perhaps, the Original family could have remained intact.

Still, there was still hope. Something had changed in her. Elijah could tell. He could sometimes glimpse a bit of the old Katarina, for instance when she went through the tunnel, and when she stuffed her bodyweight's worth of chocolate into her mouth. Yes, she had made mistakes. But the past was the past, and Elijah was willing to overlook it if she would show some improvement.

It was ten in the morning on a Saturday, and it was clear that no one wanted to be in the slums of Chicago. Gavin yawned loudly, and Katherine rolled her eyes.

"Wake up," she demanded. "If you're not focused, you're going to get hurt, and then your going to cry." She pushed a bundle of stakes into Gavin's arms. "Now put on your big boy underwear, or do I have to buy a bunch of diapers?"

"I don't understand," Gavin complained. "Can't you just bring a bunch of vampires to me and let me stake them?"

"No," Elijah retorted. "The tattoos won't develop that way. It knows when you're cheating."

"So how about if you just turn a bunch of humans and let me stake them?" Katherine glared at him.

"I'm not going to kill a bunch of innocent people just so that they could die."

"We could always visit the Chicago police station," Gavin suggested. "I'm sure that they keep a lot of murderous and ugly prisoners. They're not innocent, right?" Katherine shoved another stack of stakes into his arms.

"Nope. We do it my way." She pointed to an abandoned building. "You see that building over there?" Gavin nodded. "A vampire named Caleb lives there. He's a real nasty guy, and has been trying to get a daylight ring from the witches of Chicago for years. How about you give those witches a break?"

"Stay next to the windows," Elijah advised. "And try to vervain gas every floor, so you could weaken him. If he coughs, it'll be easier to track him." Gavin soaked in the advice, and then ran off towards the building. "I'm not sure that's he's ready," he told Katherine. "And doesn't he need to kill at least twenty five more vampires?"

"Well, we could let him stab you twenty five times and see if the map develops any faster," Katherine suggested jokingly. "But otherwise, we have no other choice. He's going to have to kill twenty five more vampires without dying." She looked up at him. "I think he could do it."

"Or we can let him stab me a couple of times." Katherine laughed but Elijah shushed her. He pointed to his ear. Listen. Katherine nodded and expanded her hearing. Ten feet. Twenty feet. Thirty feet. Fifty feet. Eighty feet.

Gavin stepped quietly through the front door, keeping it wide open. Sunlight poured into the room. Nothing. But that didn't mean that Caleb wasn't on the first floor. Uncapping a vervain gas container, Gavin rolled it along the dark hallway. The gas hissed and made its way to all the rooms on the first floor. He heard the scurrying of mice, a slight creaking of the wood floors, and a quiet screech. Footsteps thundered up the stairs to the second floor. Gavin sighed loudly. The first floor was clear. Keeping his eyes on the staircase, he quickly removed all the cardboard glued on top of the windows, and sunlight flooded the area. There. That was one less floor he had to worry about.

Gavin cautiously climbed on the stairs and entered the second floor. He repeated the same thing that he did before, rolling vervain gas containers around the rooms. This time, there was no screeching. There were only four floors in the building, so the vampire had to be either in the third or fourth floor. Quickly stripping the coverings over the windows, he took inventory. Eight stakes were already locked and loaded in a contraption hidden up his sleeve. Another eight were lined neatly inside his coat pocket, along with four vervain syringes and two more cans of vervain gas. Lastly, in his backpack, he had two vervain grenades, a box of vervain wipes, and perfume soaked in vervain. To be honest, the perfume was really vervain water in an aerosol can. He quickly wiped down each and every doorknob on the second floor with the vervain wipes, and sprayed himself with the vervain perfume. Hopefully, it would do wonders for Caleb's nose.

It was time to approach the third floor. The first room was covered with old furniture and magazines. Quickly letting sunlight into the room, he vervain wiped the railings of the staircase and the doorknobs of the rooms he could see. Shaking a vervain gas container lightly, he released the mist into the air, and watched it slowly envelop the area. Footsteps thundered around, trying to outrun the deadly cloud. Finally, shrieking could be heard as Caleb touched some of the door handles, and Gavin laughed. The vampire stumbled into the room, and collapsed into the mist pooling below. Honestly, it was all too easy for Gavin to pull out a wooden stake, and thrust it into the vampire's heart. Beneath his shirt, his tattoos snaked around his arm. As Caleb drew his last breath, the branches of Gavin's tattoos had grown.

"You're back," Elijah remarked, smirking. "It took look enough." He glanced at his watch. "Almost an hour."

"Well you can't be too careful," Gavin retorted. "It's better to be safe than sorry." Katherine lightly smacked Elijah on the arm.

"Don't be mean. At least he has both arms and legs." She turned to the hunter. "You okay? Anything broken?"

"Nope. I'm fine." Elijah snorted loudly.

"I thought I heard you stumble down the stairs." Katherine rolled her eyes. Would they ever stop fighting?

"I guess you might need those diapers after all," she teased lightly. "Someone hasn't grown into their big boy pants yet." Elijah chuckled softly, and Gavin just glared at the pair of them.

"Shut it, or I'll stake you guys myself," he murmured, embarrassed. "Now I have to go home and shower."

"You stink, and you look homeless," Katherine said, barely able to control her giggling. Even Elijah, with all his demure, was barely containing a smile. At least they were getting along, Gavin reasoned. He straightened his backpack, leaving the two vampires to continue making fun of him.

Katherine's Diary: Entry 7

Gavin has killed seven vampires so far. It's not much, but it's a start. And lately, Elijah's been getting on my nerves. I've even considered letting Gavin poke a few holes in Mr. Fancy Pants to get things moving.

"Morning," I said, my eyes glued to the newspaper. "I think it's going to be in the 90s today, so don't wear any of your fancy suits." Elijah walked pass me and poured a glass of coffee. He said nothing. "Hey!" I sighed, waving my hands in front of his face. "Did you hear me?" Elijah struggled to keep his calm demure, but he was failing miserably. "Stop ignoring me," I complained loudly. "Remember? Condition number three?"

"Friends can ignore each other," Elijah retorted playfully. He took a sip of his coffee. "And its going to be 97 degrees today. Yes, I am still wearing my usual attire." I rolled my eyes.

"Suit yourself. It's going to be boiling, and you are going to cry." Elijah scoffed.

"I don't believe so, Katarina. I never cry." I smiled. Wait. WHY AM I SMILING? This is the man who single handedly ruined my life! Time for a change of topic…

"Well, I woke up early to do the laundry," I said, folding up the newspaper and placing it on the table. I motioned my head to a pile of neatly folded clothes. Elijah narrowed his eyes.

"Is-Is that my…underwear, Katarina?" I bit my lip to stop myself from laughing.

"Yup. I believe so."

"Has it been altered in any way?" He walked over and unfolded a pair.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I replied, giggling uncontrollably. Elijah sighed loudly.

"Katarina, I can assure you that my junk is not that small." He tossed the underwear at my face. "Never mind the fact that its pink!" He picked up the folded pile of underwear and browsed through it. Yep. Every single one of them was dyed bright pink. I was laughing so hard, I was crying.

"I accidentally mixed your clothes with mine," I managed between fits of uncontrollable giggles. "I have this pink bra…" I banged my head on the table, laughing. Elijah patiently waited for me to regain control. To be honest, he waited awhile.

"Are the rest of my clothes in such terrible position?" He flipped through the clean laundry pile, shaking his head. "Of course they are."

"I tried to iron them," I confessed. "It didn't really work out."

"I can see," He replied, holding up a pair of burnt tuxedo pants. He put them down, smiling. "You, Katarina, are the most incompetent woman in the world. I have never met someone who couldn't even do laundry."

"Or iron," I added.

"Or iron," He repeated. "Just do me a favor, okay? Don't do my laundry." He sighed, and shook his head. "The only clothes I have left are the ones I'm wearing."

"You should be thanking me," I reasoned. "Now, you might be practical and wear something more weather appropriate." I raised my head. "Be grateful!" Elijah continued to mourn the loss of his precious suits. I swear I could hear him sniffle and whimper. I rolled my eyes. "Grow up, Elijah. There just clothes." He stared at me in astonishment.

"These. Were. Five. Hundred. Dollar. Underwear."

"Seriously? Who needs five hundred dollar underwear?"

"I do," he retorted, looking offended. "And if its just clothes, I'm sure you wouldn't mind me ripping your clothes." He turned around and headed towards the bedroom.

"No. You wouldn't. Elijah!" I got up and stood in front of the doorway. Wait. Was he…laughing? He was laughing. "God!" I shoved him lightly. "You're so annoying! Ugh. Why do you always get on my nerves?" And then…I kissed him. AGAIN! I know, I know. I made the exact same mistake that I did last time. I pulled away, gasping and covering my mouth. "I'm so sorry-" He pulled me in and gave me another kiss.

"I believe that you find me so annoying because you're in love with me," he whispered softly. Crap. He knew. And now, there was absolutely no way I could talk myself out of this.

"Condition number one," I squeaked. He shook his head.

"That was a different kiss. And I believe we agreed not to talk about it, or our relationship." He paused. "I have to admit, I don't plan to do much talking." Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! And you know what I said next?

"Uh…what?" He sighed loudly. God I'm stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Then he kissed me again. Conditions one, two, and three? Pfft. What conditions? Seriously, who have I been fooling? I wanted it just as much as he did. But then, I did something even stupider.

I ripped off his shirt.

I don't know. I guess it was habit for me to just want to rip off a guy's clothes. I mean, lets be honest. Elijah is pretty darn sexy. It was bound to happen eventually.

"You greedy woman," he murmured into my ear. "I liked that shirt, and it was the only shirt I had left!"

"Hmmm. I guess that's too bad," I murmured back. Our bodies were dangerously close, and I ran my hands up and down his chest. God, his abs. He had and eight pack. I bit my lip in excitement. Elijah raised my head with his hands, staring deeply into my eyes.

"This. Is. What. You. Mean. When. You. Say. That. You. Need. Time?" He gave me a quick kiss between each word. Honestly, I was in pure sexual agony. I mean, his abs! Seriously! I took off my shirt and realized that he was staring at my chest. I looked down, and blushed. "The pink bra, I take it?"

"Mm hm." He scoffed but I silenced him with another kiss. "No talking, remember?"

Okay. So in case you don't know, vampire sex is pretty much the best thing that anyone can ever experience. Ever. You never have to worry about getting pregnant, or STDs, or anything. It's every teenager's dream - sex without the consequences. And if the vampire was Elijah, how many of you would say no?

Soon, he had no pants on, and I was in my lingerie. We were dangerously close. Like REALLY close. But did I really want to go through with this? I mean this was the man that ruined my life. However, one look at his face made me think otherwise.

So I ripped of his 500 dollar underwear and he unbuckled my stupid pink bra. We went slowly, taking our time between kisses to really comprehend what we were about to do. All of a sudden, I was naked on the bed, running my eyes down every inch of his body. I wanted him. I wanted him so freaking bad.

"Katarina-" I silenced him with a nod. Yes, its okay. He raised an eyebrow, but I pushed away his doubts with another kiss. I was ready.

Now I'd never given much thought to sex with any of my other lovers. Slow or fast? Top or bottom? Usually, I was the one who decided. But this time, Elijah took charge. I would be on the bottom, and I was surprisingly okay with that. He gently spread open my legs, and caressed my hips. I grabbed the bedspread as he pressed his length against my private center. How the hell was he so experienced? I admit, I was a little jealous. We hadn't even started yet, and I was literally dying in sexual agony.

I started to trace patterns on his stomach while he drank in my body. Finally, the time came. I closed my eyes and felt him enter me. It was nice, not too rough. Slowly and softly, I felt his length inch within me. I arched my back, to push him in further. When I opened my eyes, I found him staring right back at me. Wait. Was this…love? No. It couldn't be.

We started at slow, but I didn't mind. He kissed almost every inch of skin above my shoulders, and I ran my hands up and down his body in soft, caressing motions. And then, the climax. I don't know who started it, but we went from slow to fast in a matter of seconds. We crashed into each others arms, gasping and sweating. And then, it was over.

We stayed silent as we put on our clothes, and Elijah managed to find an old t-shirt and shorts to wear. I chuckled when I saw him emerge. "You look…normal. No suit." I joked. Elijah smiled and tried to kiss me. No. I bit my lip and pushed his face away gently. His eyebrows furrowed together.

"Katarina, do not pull this stunt on me. We made love. And people make love when they are in love, do you understand?" I refused to meet his gaze.

"That's so old fashioned, Elijah." I reached down and put on my slippers. "Sex is sex."

"So this is how it's going to be then?" He asked angrily. "Sexual encounters to serve your lustful temptations?" Elijah shook his head. "Your indifference is astounding. How many have you fooled? How many have mistaken your lust for love? Ten? Twenty?" He strode out the door, not bothering to look back.

So was I wrong? I did what I've always done; used sex in order to survive. I would never be able to strike a deal without Elijah, but I just hated how intimate this scheme required to me. Intimate actions result in love. And I think that maybe, just maybe, I might be in love with Elijah. But when he left the hotel room, I not only lost my chance for the deal, a lost my chance at…love?

Now, the room is a mess. Clothes have been tossed, sofas have been flipped, but the piano remains. I bring a hand to my face, and see that it's wet. Shit. I'm fucking crying.

Once Elijah left, he stayed in the hotel lobby. Once again, he had fallen under Katarina's spell, and once again, his emotions had let him down. He was so convinced that she had changed, that she was his Katarina again. How could he be so stupid? History had repeated itself time and time again. Stefan and Damon had once mistaken her lust for love. But she hadn't loved them, had she? He didn't know, and he didn't care.

Elijah had never felt so connected to anyone except when he was with Katarina. And when he was inside her, he felt that this, whatever they had, could last forever. Instead, it barely lasted five minutes. Immediately, they had begun to fight. Sex was sex? Since when? Elijah had never heard of such a thing. He had grown and lived a life of honor, and he had never heard something as despicable as those words. Again, making love is between two people who are in love, isn't it? He couldn't understand how something so sacred could be so defiled. It hurt Elijah to believe that Katherine had been defiled as well.

Elijah extended his hearing. Thirty feet. Forty feet. Fifty feet. He surpassed floor after floor and focused on Katarina. All he could hear was the crashing and breaking of furniture. And wait. What was that? Was she…crying? No, she was sobbing. Katarina, the 500 year old vampire, was keening like a child. Elijah patiently waited for her to settle down and fall asleep. Did she feel guilty? Perhaps it meant that there was something there. He had seen it in her eyes when they had made love. Maybe, just maybe, she might actually be in love with him.

Once he heard gentle snoring, Elijah took the elevator back up to the hotel room. The bedroom door was closed, but all the furniture had been tossed. The sofa had been flipped and stuffing was oozing out. However, the piano remained untouched. Elijah was secretly relieved within, remembering Katarina's pathetic attempts to play the instrument. Quietly, he began to clean the living room. And as he picked up some clothes and tried to put them back into Katarina's suitcase, something caught his eye. Something shiny. Elijah dropped the clothes and picked the strange item up. Was it…an engagement ring? How had it ended up here? Elijah turned the ring with his fingers, an inscription catching his eye.

To the woman I love, I pledge my life to her. –Kathy and Will

Author's Note: Comments? Suggestions? Hmm…to those who predicted that Will had a major role in this, you were right! Katherine's mistake literally bit her in the ass….