"Vic, are you alright?" Conrad said, knocking on the bathroom door.
She was frozen in place, sitting on the vanity with her body bent so her head was resting on her knees. She didn't know what to do. She couldn't face Conrad. She couldn't ignore him, either. She craved the way he touched her, strong and gentle in a way that she didn't completely understand. His touch was like their relationship and at the moment, both were making her dizzy.
"I'm fine." She said quietly, forcing herself to remain monotone. She didn't want to give him any hint of emotion, good or bad. When he didn't relent, she hopped down, opening the door and walking past him.
"I told you, I'm fine." She snapped as she moved to the bed, pulling the covers up as she curled in.
"What's wrong? What happened?"
"Nothing."
"Talk to me!" He said, growing impatient. He was worried that he had done something wrong but all he had done was take care of her. What was so wrong with that?
"I said I am fine. I just want to rest. Would you please leave me alone?" She said through gripped teeth. He was suddenly aware that he hadn't done anything wrong. Quite the opposite, actually. She wasn't angry with him but she was trying everything in her power to become angry with him. Their contact had the same effect on her as it did on him. She wasn't fighting him, she was fighting herself.
"You're right. I could use a nap myself." He said, heading towards the other side of the bed.
"What in the hell are you doing?"
"You might need something. I'd better stay close." He said, climbing into bed.
"You most certainly-" she started, but his lips pressed against hers, shutting her up. The kiss was incredible but Conrad was more grateful for the few moments of silence.
"You can't do that!" She gasped when he stopped to catch his breath.
"Of course I can. That's why I married you." He knew he wouldn't be able to lighten her mood, but he sure wanted to try.
"No, you can't. Just stop-"
"Stop what?"
"Everything! We've done this same dance before, Conrad and my feet are tired. I don't want to do this again."
"What in God's name are you talking about?"
"This. Us. We fall apart and then you decide I need protecting and you swoop in and try to sweep me off my feet. I'll admit it, you're good. You usually do. And then the crisis gets resolved and you lose interest. And then we fall apart until the next crisis..."
She wasn't being mean, but her words hurt. She was right, after he felt she was no longer in danger he grew impatient with her constant wave of insults and self preservation. And all it really did was prove that he hadn't truly loved her. At least that's how she saw it. How had he been so stupid all this time? No wonder she constantly tested him, she was setting him up for a test she knew he'd fail. And he did.
"Victoria, you're right. I am so sorry. I've done nothing but let you down. I want to change that."
"Prove it."
"Anything." He said, desperate to win her over.
"Leave me alone." He knew she was testing him. If he chose to be resilient she'd say he didn't listen. If he left she'd claim he was running away. He wanted to scoop her up and hold her until she was too exhausted to deny her feelings, but he knew it was useless.
"You know where I'll be." He said, kissing her forehead. She hadn't expected him to listen to her. She wasn't even sure she wanted him to.
"Victoria," he added at the door. "This isn't me giving up on you. Not by a long shot. This is me respecting your wishes."
And with that he was gone.