Author Note – bit of a warning for language, to run through the next few chapters - the Doctor's temporary change of personality has a very short, very bad temper - and verbally some *vague* shades of Malcolm Tucker!

Chapter 6

He was still squeezing her hand.

"Let go!" Clara said sharply, and as he released his grip she drew her hand away from him and then stepped back, rubbing at her painful fingers.

"Don't you ever hurt me again!" she said to him, her tone softening as she saw the look in his eyes, and then as the light caught on his livid scar she knew she needed no more reminder of what he had been through.

"Doctor," she said, "Try and stay calm. You've been through a lot, do you remember what happened?"

He stared at her as rapid images flashed through his damaged mind.

"Of course I do," he said and he sat up, and sitting up as quickly as he did made pain register on his face and for a moment he cautiously put his hand over the pain that throbbed at his wounded temple, and then he closed his eyes, drew in a breath, and as the pain ebbed away he let go of the scar and snapped his eyes open again, looking hard at Clara.

"Of course I remember! Security breach to the Tardis shield system... shots fired, I got hit, alien LSD and their smart technology gave me a very nasty trip while the silver bastards ran their nightmare experiment from the safety of the mother ship out in deep space! Cybermen, Clara, soulless silver Cyber bastards obsessed with upgrading the human race!"

She was staring at him.

The Doctor sounded very different to the polite, reserved man who would not have taken kindly to use of bad language by anyone...

"Calm down," she said in a hushed voice.

He stared back at her.

"No Clara, you don't get it... I was the test subject. That holo world was so real I could even use my holo sonic screw driver there! They put me through hell! And you know what? The earth is next, as soon as they get their signal back and pull in all the data from the receiving station!"

He was looking at her like he expected her to understand what he was about to say next, and she did not.

"And?" she said quietly.

Her question only served to frustrate him even more.

"And I'm hoping your talents go beyond what you can do to me with your legs wrapped around my waist, because your planet is in trouble! Go and tell the security force people about the satellite!"

Her eyes were wide as she looked at him, still in shock from all he had just said... She had never heard the Doctor speak about their sex life, crudely or otherwise...

"Go!" he said sharply.

She was still staring at him.

"Satellite?"

He gave a sigh and muttered something under his breath that she didn't catch, then he ran his hand over his hair and winced as he accidentally pulled on his healing scar.

"The Cyber ship is out in deep space, they are using a fake satellite to receive data from the transmitter, it gets sent on to the mother ship! Do you get it now? Security needs to scan the satellites, find the fake one. Just tell them to lock on to it, I don't care if they use nukes or a bundle of rockets left over from last years bonfire night, that satellite has to be destroyed!"

"I've got the transmitter stored in the Tardis," she said to him, "I saved the location settings, you'll be able to lock on to the mother ship as soon as you're well enough – what are you doing?"

The Doctor folded the covers back.

"Clothes. I want them back!" he demanded, snapping his fingers at her rudely.

She opened up a storage unit at the back of the room, grabbed his suit and shoes and quickly put them on the bed.

"You get dressed, I'll go and tell them about the satellite."

Then she turned for the door.

"Clara..."

She looked back.

He regarded her darkly.

"If you run out of here and call the staff in to sedate me, I will fly away in my blue box and leave you here to rot!"

"Ouch," she said as tension crept into her voice, "That was a bit much, Doctor! I'll go and tell them what to do about the satellite, okay?"

And then she walked away, and the Doctor made a grab for his shirt but paused, clutching at his aching head as he drew in a sharp breath and felt a swirl of anger and frustration deep inside, as he wondered why his thoughts felt something like a vast library, where books that had once been in perfect order had now been scattered about in chaos and left with pages missing...

After Clara had explained to security control and the search to pinpoint the exact location of the rogue satellite had begun, Nina hurried off with her back down the corridor, heading towards the medical centre.

"You shouldn't have let him get out of bed, he needs to rest."

"I don't think we can stop him,"Clara replied, "He's so aggressive and angry all the time!"

"And that is why I suggested you both stay here for a while. Clara, its clear to me that he's suffered a great change in his personality because of the surgery. You shouldn't cope with this alone. He could be unpredictable."

Clara stopped walking and turned sharply to Nina.

"So what exactly are you suggesting?"

Nina drew in a slow breath as she met her gaze, knowing Clara was not going to like her suggestion at all.

"Maybe you should think about having him admitted to a secure hospital where he can be properly assessed, where he can get some effective medication to dampen down his moods."

"If he gets locked up he will never get better!" she said, feeling hurt at remarks that almost felt as deep as betrayal, "You don't know him like I do, Nina! He's not dangerous -"

"He could be dangerous to himself."

Anger flickered in Clara's eyes.

"While you're taking time out to complain about his temporary...disabilities, he is busy, despite his pain and confusion, trying to do all he can to stop the Cybermen invading this planet! You should be grateful to him!"

"I am," Nina replied quietly, "But he's ill, Clara -"

"He's going to be just fine," she insisted, "I can look after him."

Clara had spoken with determination, and Nina did not need to be told this was her final word on the subject.

"Fine," she replied, "Let's go and find him and see if he is okay, shall we?"

"I know he's okay," Clara replied defensively as they began to walk up the corridor once more, "If he's not in his room, he's back at the Tardis, analysing the transmitter."

"You sound sure about that."

"I am," Clara told her, quickening her pace and walking on ahead of Nina.

As predicted, the Doctors room was empty and his clothes were gone.

Clara led the way from the medical centre, then down the corridor to the Tardis, and on walking inside, she breathed a relieved sigh to see the Doctor at the console, working on the data from the transmitter.

As she and Nina walked over to join him he looked up from the controls, and in the glow of the Tardis lighting the scar on his temple looked livid.

Clara suddenly found herself recalling the word Nina's husband had spoken, to remember what he had been through, to be kind – it made sense that she remembered to do that, because the Doctor was so argumentative and aggressive it was only too easy to forget all he had been thorough, and Clara knew she was guilty of losing her own temper far too often – she had even slapped the Doctor before now, and she didn't want to do it again, not after all he had been through, no matter how much his remarks and outbursts angered her...

"I've found a solution to your problem," he said to Nina, and then he beckoned to Clara.

"Come here."

She went over to the console to join him, and he hit a button and the viewing screen revealed a view far off out in deep space where the Cyber ship stood out stark and gleaming against blackness.

"Found it!" he said, and then he looked down at the smaller monitor as data began to scroll.

"I just let them grab the signal," he said, "and I've extracted their self destruct auto command, and I'm feeding it back into their system as a direct order."

And he watched and waited as the data continued to scroll.

"But Doctor, you said you hate killing."

"I do hate killing," he replied, "I bloody detest it, but not as much as I detest these bastards!"

The data stopped scrolling.

He looked towards the screen, eyes reflecting bitterness as his head throbbed in pain and he recalled all they had stolen from him.

"You wanted data," he murmured, "Process this!"

And he hit a button.

The ship exploded in a ball of white fire, a blinding light against the darkness of deep space.

Then as the white light cooled to yellow flame as the ship began to break up and the pieces were scattered far and wide, he turned from the screen and looked to Clara and Nina.

"Problem solved," he said, "But do make sure your people destroy that satellite, Nina. I'd hate for another fleet vessel to pick up on the remnants of the data because earth defence forces either get lazy or don't know their elbows from their arses. Make sure that satellite is blown up, okay?"

She nodded.

"I'll make sure they deal with it," she replied, "And you don't need to doubt their competence, Doctor. I have faith in my people."

"You've obviously never heard of human error," he muttered, "Something your people are rather good at!" And then he turned back to the console and continued to break down the data removed from the transmitter.

"Do you need any help -"

The Doctor snapped his fingers and the Tardis doors flew open.

"Bye."

"That's me told, then," Nina replied, and she left the Tardis quickly, and the doors closed behind her.

Now Nina was gone, Clara turned sharply to the Doctor, who was still busy working on the console.

"You didn't have to be so rude to her!"

"I don't see why not. Her and her staff couldn't even figure out how to permanently stop the signal without my help."

And he looked up from the controls, and pain registered on his face as he briefly placed his fingertips over his healing scar as pain throbbed.

"And you should stop criticising me, Clara. Try saying thank you once in a while, I saved your little planet yet again – and this time I didn't even leave the decision making to you or others – if I had, you'd still be bitching over what to do, like the moon all over again."

Anger flashed in her eyes.

"You had to bring that up!"

"I don't see why not, you want everything your way and when you get it you complain about it. Humans...so bloody hard to please, I don't know why I bother!"

"And I don't know why I bother with you sometimes!"

She walked away from the console, and he followed her.

As she turned from the wall she saw he was right in front of her, glaring at her angrily.

"You don't know why you bother with me? Well maybe I should take you home so you can go and find your PE teacher and sit on his lap or whatever else of his you'd like to sit on!"

Her eyes widened.

"I can't believe you're talking to me like this!"

"Well I am right," he snapped, "You still want him – probably more than ever now your old Timelord boyfriend's got damaged... go back to Mr Pink and his youthful healthy body and sound mind, go and keep him warm at night, you know you don't want to be with me!"

"Yes I do want to be with you!" she exclaimed as hurt registered in her eyes, "Doctor, you're not well, you're not thinking straight. You ought to know how much I love you!"

He was still glaring at her as he leaned in closer, his face a fraction from hers, and suddenly as her back hit the wall, Clara felt cornered.

"You don't want to be with me, Clara. You don't even know me any more!"

"Don't do that!" she said, "Don't you ever lean in close to my face like that again – it's threatening, get back!"

Anger still blazed in his eyes.

"Who said you could be the boss? Not me! If you don't like it, I'll take you back to your own time and you can fuck off and be someone else's control freak!"

Clara lashed out, slapping his face hard and sending him staggering backwards.

She gave a gasp, realising too late that he was still weak, still recovering – but as he fell against the console he put out his hand, catching the edge of it just in time.

He pulled himself upright and drew in a sharp breath as he looked at Clara, his cheek was red from the stinging blow and as she saw hurt and confusion in his eyes, she recalled this had not been the first time she had ever struck him – and this time she regretted it more than ever – the Doctor was ill, he had no understanding of the impact of his own behaviour...

"Sorry!" she said in a hushed voice as the Doctor stood there looking dazed.

"That was a bit too hard..." he said, and he leaned against the console as he brought the back of his hand up to his nose, then as he took it away again there was a bright crimson stain and Clara stepped forward, her eyes wide with shock as she realised she had drawn blood.

"Doctor, I'm so sorry!"

He recalled a threat she had once made and looked at her accusingly.

"Nice try, Clara. Do it a bit harder next time and you never know, I might just manage to regenerate!"

Then he coughed and leaned against the console harder as the blood flow increased, running down his face and dripping on to his shirt.

She saw a flash of panic in his eyes.

"Oh that's just great!" he complained, "Now I'm bleeding to sodding death, what have you done to me?"

Then he briefly closed his eyes as a wave of dizziness swept over him.

"Do something!" he said, and now he sounded shaken up.

Clara put her arm around him and led him towards the Tardis door as the nosebleed refused to stop and left a trail of blood dripping as they went back into the corridor.

"I need to get you to the medical centre," she said, "We need to stop that bleeding."

And the Doctor shot her a frosty look but said no more as he kept his hand over his nose, trying in vain to stem the flow of blood.

Clara led him up the corridor, all the while she was shaking as she wondered how she could have allowed herself to become so angry and forget how fragile he really was at this time...

As the Doctor was taken into the treatment room, he glanced back at Clara and she saw coldness in his eyes that only made her guilt weigh heavier. Then as Nina crossed a corridor and saw her sitting outside the emergency room, she hurried over to her and took a seat beside her.

"What's happened?"

Clara froze for a moment as she remembered how Nina had suggested having the Doctor locked away...

"I'm not sure," she replied, "He was working on the console and he suddenly got this nosebleed that wouldn't stop. It was a bit scary...so much blood."

"You're shaking," Nina replied.

"It scared me," Clara said, and then she looked at her and Nina saw fear reflecting in her eyes.

"Could this be serious? I mean he's never had this problem before."

"I don't know," Nina replied, "I hope it's nothing, but bleeding after the kind of surgery he's been through could mean anything – he might have an internal bleed - that could mean more surgery to fix the problem."

In her mind the moment replayed as she lashed out hitting him hard, and Clara drew in a sharp breath as she fought to hold back her tears.

"He has to be okay, I just want him to walk out of there and be okay!"

Nina looked at her thoughtfully.

"Clara, is there anything you're not telling me?"

As she looked at Nina, just for a second, guilt flashed in her eyes.

"No" she said, "Why would you say that?"

"I was just thinking how difficult he is to handle – are you sure you don't need any help? Why don't I call the psychiatric facility and -"

"What, for me?" she said, and blinked away tears as she laughed nervously, "Seriously, Nina – leave it alone. I can look after him."

And then as she saw a look of sadness in Clara's eyes, Nina's suspicions grew.

"He is volatile, bad tempered, verbally abusive, very hyped up – I wouldn't blame you if you'd tried to restrain him or -"

"I didn't!" Clara caught her breath, realising she had been a little too emphatic about that point.

"I didn't," she said again, now sounding much calmer, "He just started bleeding. I didn't even see how it happened."

And her gaze switched to the door of the treatment room as she silently prayed for good news.

After a short wait, the door opened and Clara rose from her seat.

The Doctor left the room and crossed the corridor, and as she looked into his eyes she wanted to cry, because his expression was impossible to read and she saw no hint of either anger or forgiveness in his blue eyes.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"As okay as I can be after my nose pissing blood all over a clean shirt!" he snapped, indicating to the crimson stain that covered the front of his white shirt, "The doctor said it was caused by the combination of meds I was on after the surgery – they gave me an injection to stop the bleeding."

And then he began to walk away, back down the corridor that would eventually lead to the Tardis, and as Clara hurried to catch up with him Nina did too.

"How did it happen?" Nina asked, and the Doctor stopped walking and turned back to her, and Clara caught her breath.

"I was hit in the face," he said, and he glanced to Clara, saw the look of shock in her eyes and then continued explaining to Nina:

"It was my fault, I should be resting but I had your planet to save yet again, so after all that effort I was worn out. I walked into the Tardis door."

And Clara could not look at him as she turned away as tears filled her eyes, and then she carried on walking towards the Tardis.

By the time Clara got there, the Doctor had caught up with her and Nina was no where to be seen.

"You lied for me."

He opened the door.

"Shut up and get in the Tardis!"

She obeyed, hurrying inside and he followed and then closed the door firmly.

Clara turned back to him as she tried not to cry as she looked at him and wondered why he had hidden the truth.

"Why did you lie?"

"Because it's 2060 and any form of domestic violence is punishable by fifteen years in prison, that's why! Now shut up and stop asking stupid questions."

He walked over to the console and began to tinker with the controls.

"Nina wants to have you put in a secure hospital," she said quietly, "She mentioned it to me just now."

"She mentioned it to me too," he replied, "I told her to stick her caring attitude up her backside. You don't need to tell me staying around is a bad idea – that's why we're not."

And he threw a lever and with a wheeze and a whoosh the Tardis faded in and out of sight and vanished, setting off on a journey through dark, peaceful space.

"Where are we going?" Clara said quietly.

The Doctor looked up from the console, and as the lights glowed the scar on his temple still looked painfully fresh.

"I don't know," he replied, "I just know we had to get away."

And then he fell silent and continued to check the controls as Clara stood there watching but saying nothing as that feeling came over her again, as if she ought to be mourning for the man he used to be, because it seemed that man she used to know was gone forever - and she was afraid he would never return...