Harro dere, I'm back! Oh, and I'm confirming Singa's sexuality! She's aromantic asexual, while her 1P (Sing)

is asexual-but-not-aromantic!

Oh, and thanks to eyesopened, invisible-2-the-stars, CheshireKitKat, Prucanisthewaytogo, Solar Kitty and Syren Novade

for reviewing!

well... ENJOY!

Narrator's POV

"HOWLER'S ORIGINATED FROM KOREA DA-ZE!" a voice screamed out from the howler, making many students clap their hands over their ears. When that statement was over, all hell broke loose. It was like being in an overcrowded restaurant where everyone's voice was magically amplified 100 times by... something.

"KOREA! DON'T HOG THE LETTER!"

"IM YONG SOO! I WANT TO SPEAK TO THEM ARU!"

"ANIKI~ YOU'RE BREASTS BELONG TO ME DA-ZE!"

"AIYA ARU!"

"VE~ IS THERE-A PASTA OVER AT-A HOGWARTS? DO YOU-A NEED ME TO-A SEND IT TO-A YOU?"

"G'T AW'Y. I W'NT T' T'LK TO M' W'FE."

At this, Tino Vainamoinen, also known as Finland, blushed heavily.

"I WANNA TALK TO MAMA AND JERK ENG-ARTHUR!"

"LET ZHE AWESOME ME TALK FIRST SINCE I AM ZE AWESOMEST!"

"I WANT TO TALK TO MI AMIGO!"

"GET AWAY FROM MY IDIOTA FRATELLO YOU POTATO BAST*RD!"

"NO! I'M FIRST! I WANNA TALK TO NORGE!"

By then, the howler had attracted the attention of every student in the hall. Everyone was staring at it. The transfers (well, Arthur and Vladimir did) looked appalled. The teachers looked bewildered. The students were laughing. Dumbledore just looked faintly amused.

"LET ALASTAIR TALK FIRST ARU!"

"Yao-san is right. He was the person who ret them use the retter," the new voice was slightly quieter than the rest.

"EH... I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY EXCEPT YOU ALL OWE ME A YEAR'S WORTH OF WHISKY. EACH. EXCEPT LITTLE *HIC* LIECHTEN AND VASH. THEY'RE FINE."

Suddenly, there was a new voice who cut in. This voice was also slightly softer than the rest. "Mr. Arthur, how are you? Mr. Alastair told them about the talking letter and-" she-the owner of the voice was female-was cut off by an angry shout, "TAKE ANOTHER STEP NEAR HER AND YOU'RE SWISS CHEESE!"

"Bruder!"

"Lilli, stay out of this!"

There was also an interesting 'conversation' going on in the background between a certain Prussian man and a very manly Hungarian woman. It was promptly ended by a loud CLANG!- the sound of a frying pan/skillet colliding into a hard skull.

"MAMA! PAPA AND I JUST WANT TO TELL YOU THAT WE MISS YOU VERY MUCH! JERK ARTHUR! I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY TO YOU! BYE!"

At this, our dear friend with a white hat and a missing dog blushed even redder.

"YOW! YOU STEPPED ON MY FOOT!"

"O-oh.. I'm sorry, Miss Belgium!"

"NO, IT'S OKAY, LIECHTENSTEIN! OH, WHAT IS IT ROMANO? DO YOU WANT A WAFFLE?"

Everyone in the hall heard something along the lines of 'F***ing tomato bast*rd'.

Suddenly, someone from the howler started wailing. "NORGE! WHY DID YOU DISAPPEAR ON ME LIKE THAT?!

"VLAD! I JUST WANT TO TELL YOU THAT I MISS YOU VERY MUCH, AND SO DOES ALEKSANDER, EVEN THOUGH HE DOESN'T WANNA ADMIT!"

"NO I DON'T!" rang throughout the hall.

"NO VAY AM I GONNA LET AN UNAWESOME LADY INSULT ZHE AWESOME M-"

There was another loud clang.

Then there was a shout of, "NO! I'M OLDER!"

"M' Older."

"NO I AM!"

Needless to say, our friend with the spiky hair was very glad that Norway wasn't there to strangle him.

But instead, he got the frying pan treatment.

"YOU CAN THANK ME LATER, LUKAS," a female voice said. This was, of course, everyone's favourite yaoi-fan.

"GET AWAY FROM MY FRATELLO POTATO BAST*RD!"

"MAMA, LADONIA SAYS HI!"

"Peter-kun, Marcello-san asks whether you have seen where Paulette-kun went."

"OH, I DUNNO WHERE SHE WENT."

They were interrupted by a huge, amplified yawn. Coming from the world's sleepiest nation.

"ANYYYYYYWAYS, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US WHERE YOU WERE GOING!?"

"BECOME ONE WITH MOTHER RUSSIA, DA?"

There was a slight pause as someone said something.

"KOLKOLKOLKOL..."

A dark, purple aura was emitted from the howler and everyone in the hall shuddered, wondering if the temperature had dropped, and why so suddenly. The howler burst into flames and was reduced to nothing but ashes, but before it self-destructed, everyone heard the chanting stop and a new chant beginning...

"MARRYMEMARRYMEMARRYMEMARRYMEMARRYME..."

Marcello= Seborga

Paulette= Wy

Aleksander= Bulgaria

The person who mentioned Bulgaria's name was Moldova

Harry's POV

Harry stared, wide eyes, as the howler burst into flames. What just happened? He was about to ask Alfred what had just happened when a loud, urgent voice screamed, "OLIVER! OUT!" and the pretty Asian, Jia Feng, pushed Oliver Kirkland out of the hall, her speed almost inhumane. "GOGOGOGOGO!" she yelled at him. Then she turned to the students in the hall just as the second letter started smoking.

"IF YOU WANT TO REMAIN INNOCENT COVER YOUR EARS!" she hollered, her voice audible in the silent hall. "OR YOU'LL HEAR HORRIBLE CURSING!"

Harry saw that everyone in the hall looked confused, even the new transfers. But the Asian girl looked so serious and appalled that Harry immediately stuffed his fingers in his ears, but he knew that it wouldn't be enough to block out the Howler's sound.

Still, he tried.

The Howler lasted two full minutes, with one lengthy paragraph made of one particular, sweet, lady-like, refined four-letter word. Harry heard murderous screaming from outside the hall (Oliver) and he winced.

When the Howler was over, all was silent.

Oliver's POV (Beware of Insanity!)

Oliver heard the cursing, even from outside. His brow furrowed as he heard the first swear word hit his ears. It was Allen's voice. And the swear words just kept flowing out from Allen's dirty little mouth. Why couldn't Allen be sweet and polite like dear little Singa? He had to teach little Allie a lesson... Allen never seemed to learn... The swear jar wasn't a good enough punishment... He needed to make Allie wash his mouth clean!

"Oh, Allie," Oliver giggled, pink rings forming in his bright blue eyes. "You didn't really think you could get away from me, did you? You thought you could make your mouth all muddy again without me noticing~ As your foster father and your brother and your cupcake maker, it's my job to wash you clean again! Allie, darling, I'll wash you 'till your squeaky clean~"

He giggled insanely and skipped over to one of the mirrors in the great hall and placed his hands on it and concentrated, giggling slightly as his pale, freckled hands melted through the cold surface of the mirror.

"Allen~ Daddy's coming to help you clean~" he sang, pushing his way through the mirror to the world he had come from. You'll be so clean you won't be able to speak again for months! Or breathe, for that matter~

Of course, we'll have to leave you in the sun for you to dry! Hehehe~

I'm not awesome enough to own Disclaimer. How could I be awesome enough to own HP and Hetalia?

Oops! I think that's... At least I hit 1,000 words! Ufufufu~ ^J^

Sorry for the short chapter... I was stuck on the 2P!Howler for a long time... Then I got rid of it and

took advantage of Allen's potty mouth. Hehehe~

Oh, and who like Insane!Oliver? Everyone, that's for sure! Well, everyone except the Hetalia Nations...

Question: Do you like my OC Singa so far?

Review please!