Dick hadn't seen Mac for quite a few days now. He was going to classes, hanging out at the fraternity house, and spending a lot of time at the Grand, doing a whole lot of nothing. On the day he had seen Mac last, they did go bed shopping, just as he suggested. Mac picked out the cheapest thing imaginable- poor girl- so he called up afterwards and had them charge him for a nice queen size bed. They would deliver that one instead, probably any day now. He's sure that Mac would be mad at him for giving her charity or something, but he didn't see it like that. All he spent his money on was booze and video games, anyways.

Dick laid on the couch in the Grand. Logan was gone somewhere, probably still trying to court Veronica once again. He looked at the ceiling. He was only 19 years old, why did he suddenly feel like he was having a mid-life crisis? Oh, right. Maybe it's because I have practically no family already.. no father, no mother, no stepmother, no girlfriend...and no little brother. And my days are spent drunk and alone.

He took a swig from his flask and pushed his hair back. It was hard being this version of Dick but acting like "fun" Dick was much worse. Nobody was ever going to love a man who couldn't ever take anything seriously.

knock knock.

Dick begrudgingly stood up and headed towards the door. Logan probably forgot his key card or something. Dick wasn't always the dumb one. In his drunken state, he just opened up the door and walked away before even looking at the visitor. He plopped face down onto the couch.

"Dick, are you alright?"

Mac? Not what I need right now. He felt Mac crouch down beside him and place her hand on his back.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

He shrugged, sat up, and Mac maneuvered herself beside him. "I don't know what to say," he said. It was the truth. He rested his head on Mac's lap and closed his eyes.

"Do you want me to tell you about him.…Cassidy?". Mac was hesitant about mentioning Cassidy, but she felt that Cassidy was the reason Dick was drunk and alone. She was supposed to be here to meet Logan and talk about their website, but clearly he wasn't here yet.

Dick said nothing.

"When I first met Cassidy...I thought he was normal. Or about as normal as me. We both had issues, you know….we felt like second class citizens...no, that's not right. I mean, we felt like we were people who were ignored or shunned for whatever reason. So when we met, and we liked each other, I was ecstatic. And I think he was too. Looking back now...I think he wanted some sense of normalcy. But he couldn't do it, you know? He wasn't normal. I didn't know why...I mean, I thought there was something wrong with me. I do, still, sometimes think that. But Cassidy..it was like he had no identity…". Mac knew her voice was shaky and she felt Dick tense up as she started talking. She absentmindedly stroked his hair as she talked. They sat like that for a few minutes more.

"I could have helped him, Mac. I didn't let him be anybody...I even took away his name. He was just Beaver for years and years.."

"Dick…," Mac was hesitant. She didn't know how to put this into words. "Cassidy was a victim...of a lot of things. But so were you. You couldn't talk to anyone and be real for some of the same reasons he couldn't. Nobody taught you how to...nobody told you that you could have real, human, emotions. Just because you're rich doesn't mean you can't have pain, grief, love...But now, you have to be what Cassidy couldn't be."

"What's that?"

"I don't know...I guess, you should take what life has given you, and learn how to confide in others..so that you don't have to be in pain constantly".

"What do you think of me, Mac? Really".

Sure, Mac had developed this crush on Dick, but this question stumped her. What do I think of Dick?

"I like you...I'm just kind of scared...or intimidated of you. I can sense that you've changed, but the old Dick...I mean, I'm just kind of waiting for you to switch off this personality right now and make fun of me for talking about him…I don't think you'll do it, but the fear's there. And what about, you know, me? You shouldn't even want to be near me...and I can't tell when you're serious or not. The old Dick would never be…"

This sobered Dick up a little. Great, the "old" Dick is coming back to haunt me once again.

"Mac...just trust me, okay? I need this. If I ever turn into old psycho jerk Dick again...Let Ronnie come after me. She's the scariest person I know, by far"

"Me too, Dick. Me too". Mac smiled at him.

"Hey, Dickster! What's happenin-?" Logan's voiced boomed throughout the apartment. He paused at the sight of Dick and Mac. They looked like friends. Is this real life? Pretend like you didn't see anything. This is good, for the both of them, Logan thought. Dick sat up and looked at Logan while Mac composed herself.

"So, Logan. How's the site doing then, officially?" Mac said.

"It's doing great, Mac. Best decision I've ever made. What can I say, I know why people really go on the internet."

"Dude, she just wants to know how much money she's got in the bank. Little Macster has been waiting here for you and this massive payday." Dick smiled at Mac.

"Alright, Alright. You ready for this, Mac?" Logan pulled out a check and handed it to her. "Merry fucking Christmas!"

Holy crap, Mac thought. She jumped up and down, squealed, and gave Logan a giant hug. "This is so amazing! Oh my gosh, Logan! I feel like my whole life has changed! Well. not my whole life. But damn, I can pay off some of my college debt with this." The check was for $20,000, more than Mac had ever expected.

Dick looked at Mac as she hugged Logan. Even though Dick had been in a bad mood before, seeing Mac this happy made him feel happy,

"Where's Veronica? We need to part-ay!" Mac said in her best rich girl impression. It reminded him of Madison a little and Dick shuddered.

Veronica arrived within 15 minutes. Logan and Dick popped open the liquor cabinet and Mac and Veronica downed their first glass quickly. Veronica stopped at two but Mac was on her fourth.

"Damn Mack, slow it down a bit." Dick said

'Dick, you're telling a girl not to drink? Who are you?" said Veronica

"I've changed Ronnie. When I finally get Mac, trust me, it will be her crawling to me, and she will be sober."

"Ha! In your dreams, Dick," retorted Veronica. "Mac would never, Would you Mac?'

'I don't know Veronica. This Dick fellow has been growing on me lately," an already drunken Mac replied. She sauntered over to Dick, who was sitting on a bar stool, and placed herself on his lap and flung her arms around his neck.

"He's kind of cute, isn't he?'

Dick grinned at Mac. He could get used to this.

"Oh, no'' said Logan. "I never thought Mac would be the loose one in this group"

"Hey!" said Mac. "It's not being loose when you're attracted to the person," she stumbled over her words, "but you can't admit it when you're sober, for fear of rejection." Mac giggled and slid her hand through Dick's hair.

Damn, she must be really drunk, thought Dick.

'"And that's all folks!" said Veronica. She pulled Mac off Dick and led her to the couch.

"Dick, can I talk to you for a second?" said Veronica.

"No, don't take him away, Ronnie! Don't punish him for my feelings!" they heard Mac yell as they headed into Dick's room.

"Dick," said Veronica

"Ronnie."

"Logan told me how he saw you and Mac when he came home."

"It was nothing. We were just talking"

"What would you two possibly have to talk about?" said Veronica suddenly.

Dick shot her a look.

"Oh," said Veronica with a less angry tone. "Sorry. I just didn't think you two would-"

"We just talked about Cassidy a little...you know "healing" and all that crap. Don't worry about her. I wouldn't hurt her."

"I want to believe you-"

"I know, the "old" Dick," he used air quotes for emphasis. "Well, between you and me. I hate the "old" Dick. And the "new" Dick could never hurt someone like Mac and live with himself afterwards. And I don't know why we're even talking about this...we're just friends. It's just the liquor talking, for her."

"Okay, Dick. I believe you. Just remember, I've got Mr. Sparky on my side" warned Veronica.

They walked back out in the living room. Logan was having a very heated argument with Mac about not drinking any more. When he saw Dick and Veronica come back he said, "This little sneak went over there and drank another whole glass while I l was looking the other way! Veronica, you should have told me that Mac couldn't hold her liquor before we went popping open everything in here." Logan was very flustered and even Dick thought it was a little bit cute.

"She'll be fine. Relax." Dick went over to Mac and dragged her away from their stash.

"Dick, take me to your bedroom." Mac slurred.

"No!" yelled Logan and Veronica.

"Let's watch a movie, " suggested Dick simply, ignoring Mac's liquor induced slutiness, "and then hopefully Mac will sleep this off"

Logan picked out an action movie, one of Veronica's favorites, to watch. Dick didn't care. He was more focused on the drunk girl next to him. She was cute, like this, but he wished that she hadn't gotten drunk. It was hard for him to figure out his feelings about her when he couldn't trust a single thing that she said.

Logan and Veronica settled on the chair, once again, leaving the couch to Dick and Mac. Dick caught Veronica glaring at him, but he could tell that Veronica wasn't as afraid for Mac as she would have been if they didn't have that conversation a few minutes ago. Dick pulled the sleepy Mac over to him and wrapped his arms around her and let her head rest on his chest. Logan and Veronica probably thought he was out of his mind, but so be it.

"Do you see those two?" Veronica whispered to Logan. "I'm supposed to know everything-", she paused when Logan laughed, "but I would have never predicted this one."

"I did." said a proud Logan.

"What?"

"I did. I swear to God. Dick needs somebody like her. Do we make any sense on paper, Veronica? No." Logan smirked.

"Is there a "we" again?". Veronica looked up at Logan.

"Of course, babe. I'll always want you. I was just waiting for you know...like a cosmic signal or something. Or for you to say something first." He laughed. Veronica kissed him.

"Get a room!" shouted Dick.

"Oh, we will." muttered Logan as he took Veronica off to his bedroom.

Ah, young love, thought Dick. He stroked Mac's hair. She looked like she was sleeping already.

"Dickkkkk," Mac groaned "put me to bed." She gave him puppy dog eyes and Dick couldn't resist.

"You want me to take you home?"

"No. I won't be able to make it." Mac's eyes darted to Dick's bedroom.

Fuck it, Dick thought. He swooped Mac up once again, kicked open his door, and placed her on his bed. He pulled the blankets up over her.

"It smells just like you," Mac said as she brought the covers up to her face. "like sand, and beer, and cologne."

Dick grinned.

"Lay down with me, Dick. Please."

"I shouldn't-"

"I'm not hardly even that drunk anymore. Just lay here beside me. I'll try my best not to grope you during the night."

"You don't have to try that hard, Mac." Dick chucked as he somewhat awkwardly climbed into bed with Mac. He wasn't used to this. Being in bed with a girl he actually liked was new and frightening territory. This would have made Beaver nervous, he thought with a sick feeling in his stomach. He did his best to brush it off. He pulled off his shirt and brought the covers over. He turned over to look at Mac, but she was already staring at him.

"What?" Dick asked

"Nothing. You're just kind of beautiful, you know, for a boy." Mac said quietly.

"I've got nothing on you, babe." Dick smiled. This girl is going to be the death of me, he thought.