helo today instead of chapter 6 i am here to GIFT you a christmas special ho ho ho

PL0X ENJOY! AND HAVE A MERY CHRISMAS! I HOEP SANTA-SAN GIVES U LOTS OF NAKED ANIME DAKIMURAS!

it is december 24th and it is christmas eve. everyone is preparing for holidays and dreading to watch ungrateful shits open their gifts and yell that their nash grier sweatshirt is in the WRONG COLOR

2day there are few ppl last minute christmas shopping and thOSE people ARE...

"do u wanna build a snowmeme!"

"shut the fuck up yato that's NOT how the song goes." sasuke hisses. i, sasuke uchiha, have watched frozen 20 times. i am currently wearing my olaf tank top and listening to the frozen soundtrack on my phone. take THAT, you so called 10 year old frozen fans.

'i really really want to take a photo with santa-chan! :3c" yato whined

"oh my kamisama, you are 5050439049 years old. U ARE TOO OLD FOR DAMN SANTA-SAN PHOTOS!" sasuke turns his volume higher. reindeers are better than ppl... and gods..

"you can't call me too old for this shit whiLE YOU LISTEN TO THE GOD DAMN FROZEN SOUNDTRACK FOR THE TRILLIONTH TIME!" yato pouts. sasuke hates it when yato pouts cuz he can NEVER say no it is SO weird. "pl0x sasuke."

'we are HERE to buy kinky gifts for shrek-sama, not take santa photos, geez." sasuke says.

"i was gonna buy you the olaf plush..."

sasuke gasps. "u..u are joking.."

"i was gonna get you the one that SPEAKS."

SASUKE IS GASPING LOUDER "t-THE ONE WITH THE HAT?!"

"Yeah, but not anymore." yato rolls his eyes. LOL HE IS PWNING THIS ARGUEMENT.

sasuke caves in. "FINE! FINE! WE'LL TAKE SANTA PHOTOS RIGHT NOW!"

they w alk to santa photos and booty their way to the front of the line. the kids move to the side the moment they see sasuke's olaf shirt. sasuke grins in approval.

"i told u this shirt would come in handy. who's olaFFING now." sasuke says

they walk up to santa and yato climbs on his leg and onto his lap. sasuke rolls his eyes and walks off to the side. santa STARES at sasuke. "ho ho ho SON, sit on down there is plenty room on my thunder thighs."

sasuke hesitantly sits down on santa's other leg. santa smells... familiar.

sasuke turns to look at yato, and yato has a funny face too. this smell... santa-san.. he smells like...

"hello, sasuke-kun, welcome to my swamp."

"S..SHREK SAMA!?" SASUKE AND YATO SCREAM AT THE SAME TIME! THE KIDS ARE SHOCKED AND SANTA-SAMA IS BLUSHU BLUSHU.

"shhHHHHhhh!" shrek hushes "ur going to ruin the kids dreams. for now, plZ call me santa."

"i-i-i-i-,,, uhhuHUHuh..o-okay...sh-I MEAN- santa-sama..." yato stutters oh how i wish i wasnt a god so i could PRAY TO MYSELF TO SAVE ME!

even sasuke is blushu blushu. he looks so hot in that beard.. beard papa's..beard daddy...

"So, uh, are you kiddos gonna tell me what you want for christmas or do you just want to skip to the picture?" shrek asks in a LOW, santa-san-like voice.

"I-II-I-I-I I WANT YOU-" yato starts. SASUKE SLAPS HIS HAND OVER YATO'S MOUTH. we must keep this rated G! FOR THE CHILDREN!" sasuke whispers in yatos ear.

"okay, so santa-sama," Sasuke starts. "I want an olaf sweater, a frozen snapback, an olaf plushie; THE REGULAR AND THE ONE THAT SINGS, i want ALL the frozen dolls, ESPECIALLY HANS. i dont care what anyone says, his sideburns turn me on, and i also want-"

"i thought we were keeping this G RATED." yato glares.

"YOU'RE keeping this g rated, however, I GET TO HAVE SOME FUN." sasuke snaps. "i also want an elsa mug and I want a matching anna mug so a special someone to match with me. wink, wink."

"awww sasuke!" yato squeals.

"NOT YOU DAMN IT." sasuke yells. stupid ass yato ruining my FLIRTING MOMENT WITH SHREK-SAMA!

"continuing from where i left off-"

"i'm sorry sir, but we have a long line up and we need you to leave." the security guard interrupts and points to the 3943038493 kids in line.

"BUT I DIDN'T FINISH!" SASUKE COMPLAINS.

"AND I DIDN'T EVEN GET TO TELL SANTA-SAMA WHAT I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS." YATO JOINS IN.

"As I recall from the thirty fricken minutes you've been here," he looks at yato. "you want santa, which is kind of dirty and kinky, excuse me while i puke." he turns to sasuke. "and you want a shit ton of frozen merch. First of all you need to CHILL, no pun intended, and step aside and leave the frozen to the god damn kids. I DO NOT WANT TO BUILD A SNOWMAN WITH YOU."

So sasuke and yato are kicked out and ten minutes later, they are sitting outside an icecream shop, eating mint ice cream and feeling emo.

"you wanna go buy some emo eyeliner?" sasukemo asks.

"i'm too emo to go buy emo eyeliner..." yato sighs.

sasuke SLAM his hands on teh table. "wTF ARE WE DOING BRO! its christmas eve! we should be ho ho ho-ing not oh..oh..oh-ING!"

"what do u suggest we do then?"

it is 11 pm and shrek is going home. he is late to his christmas party and he still has to change before leaving the house. he drives home and a loud GASP escapes his ogre lips.

all over his house are photos of boku no pico and hatsune miku memes. his house is RUINED! he runs around checking to see if there is a part left spotless. INSTEAD He finds a card under his welcome mat.

Dear "Shrek-sama",

A couple of my dear friends, who I will name Emo and Kamisama, called me through my public call number and told me that YOU are impersonating me and being a piece of shit.

As Santa Claus, you are SUPPOSED to give the children what they want. I'm sure that KAMISAMA asked santa for YOU, more specifically you're ogre dick, if you're too stupid to realize their kinky hints.

You're an embarrassment to Santa Claus' everywhere, and hopefully THIS teaches you a lesson.

I was more than HAPPY to give Emo all the Frozen merchandise he wanted. As for KAMISAMA, if you want to redeem yourself and be a GOOD, KINKY, SANTA LIKE HOW YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE, then I better see you pull your kinky shit together and run to Yato's house right now.

Sincerely, Santa Claus-dono.

P.S Reindeers are better than ogres.

thx guys for reading i hope u have a HOH HOB HOHOHO HO merry christmas. stay kinky 3