I'm running through the forrest, but what I am running from I am not sure. It's sunny and warm and by all reasonable thought beautiful but I'm utterly terrified.

I break into a clearing, breathing heavily and clutching my sides. That's when I hear the mockingjays singing, the same for notes over and over.

For a second, I'm frozen in fear but then I run again. I make it only a few yards before my way is blocked.

"Hi, Prim." Rue's voice is happy and warm, but blood is gushing from the gaping wound in her stomach. I stagger back, turn to run in another direction. Again, Rue blocks my path."Don't run, Prim. There's nowhere to run anyway."

"I'm sorry,"I sob."I'm sorry you died, I'm sorry."

She steps closer towards me, cupping my face with dreadful cold hands and opens her mouth to speak. Instead of words, bloody spittle flies from her lips and she collapses, an arrow through her throat. I try to scream, but now sound will come out.

Katniss has a second arrow nocked, smiling at me."It's okay, little duck. I'm here. I volunteered to keep you safe, remember?"

Safe, she says. Then why is she aiming for me?

"Katniss, please,"is all I can force out before she lets the arrow fly. Only then do I realise she wasn't aiming for me, afterall. The arrow wisks past my head and straight into Peeta's eye. He remains standing, even smiling."She hits them right in the eye, every time."

His arms close around me, tightening until I can't breath."Together or not at all, Prim. Looks like it's not at all."

My eyes find Katniss again, hoping she'll rescue me, but she lowers her bow, frowning."That is what you said, Prim."

Rue still dead at my feet, Katniss watching calmly, Peeta cutting off my air...

I try to scream again, and this time I can.

I wake up still screaming. Effie's in my room in seconds, followed by Haymitch. Crying, I wordlessly hold my arms out to Effie and she comes over to embrace me, stroking my hair and mumbling words of comfort. Haymitch walks out and returns a bit later with a mug, moving past Cinna and Portia who hover around the door, although I have no idea when they showed up. Haymitch waves them away and, at my nod, they leave me with my mentor and escort.

"Rue?"Haymitch asks, handing me the cup of tea. Effie shoots him a disapproving look, but I don't mind him asking. He's gotten a sense of when to asks about my nightmares and when to leave it be. It's weird, because sometimes I can't even tell why I want to talk about some but not others. I take a careful sip from the hot liquid."Yeah. Peeta, too. He should be somewhere on this train and instead he's -"

I can't bring myself to finish the sentence. We sit in silence, me leaning against Efiie, sipping my tea, her arms still loosely draped around me, Haymitch scanning our faces – for what, I could not say. Once I empty the mug, he takes it from my grasp."Get some sleep."

I only nod, laying down again and looking to Effie, wordlessly asking her to stay. Luckily, she understands.

.

The first half of next day passes by me in a blur. My prep team descends on me once more, there's food and conversation everyone tries to make upbeat, but I don't really register any of it until we pull into District Eleven.

Where our fence is somewhat of a joke to the people, this district seems more like a prison. And Eleven is huge. I can't even imagine how many people must live here...

We have barely arrived when I'm already taken to the square and ushered onto stage.

As usual, a special platform has been constructed at the bottom of the stage for the families of the dead tributes. On Thresh's side, there's only an old woman with a hunched back and a tall, muscular girl I'm guessing is his sister. On Rue's ... I'm not prepared for Rue's family. Her parents, whose faces are still fresh with sorrow. Her five younger siblings, who resemble her so closely. I feel my throat closing up, half sorrow, half panic. But their faces strengthen my resolve, too. I will bring down Snow before any of them have to worry about the reaping, no matter the cost.

I start with a part of the speech Effie wrote for me before I ever even thought about stirring things up, hoping to lull the Capitol controll centre into a sense of false security. I don't want them to cut off what I have to say. I want everyone to hear.

And then it's time for the personal comments. It's expected if you were allies, but Thresh and I weren't. I start with him anyways.

"Thresh was someone it was impossible not to admire,"my voice is steady, and I am glad for that."He was strong, he was brave, he was determined, but above all, he was kind. He was his own person to his last breath. Thresh wouldn't join the Careers. He wouldn't think twice about helping me, or Rue. He wouldn't play by any rules but his own. I didn't know Thresh well, but I know I wouldn't stand here without him, and I know that I wish I'd known him better."

His grandmother smiles, tears in her eyes, and his sister looks even more like him, pride written clearly on her face.

I turn to Rue's family, no longer able to keep the tremor out of my voice."Rue was more than my ally, more than my friend even. We understood eachother and we completed eachother. She is with me every moment of every day. She's in the songs of mockingjays and the taste of berries and the flowers in the meadow. From the moment our names were called, people said we were too young to win. I say she was too young to die."

I hear a curse from a peacekeeper behind me and from somewhere in the crowd, someone whistles our four note tune.

By the end of the tune, I have found the whistler, a wizened old man in a faded red shirt and overalls. His eyes meet mine.
What happens next is not an accident. It is too well executed to be spontaneous, because it happens in complete unison. Every person in the crowd presses the three middle fingers of their left hand against their lips and extends them to me. It's our sign from District Twelve, the last good-bye I gave Rue in the arena.

"Miss Everdeen, time to go,"the mayor says, fear clear in his voice as he places his hand on my arm to guide me away. Halfway to the door, I think better of it. I should have mirrored the salute. It's not too late to do so...

I wrench away from the mayor and make my way back, reaching the stage again just in time to witness a pair of Peacekeepers dragging the old man who whistled to the top of the steps. Forcing him to his knees before the crowd. And putting a bullet through his head.

Haymitch has to drag me away, screaming at the top of my lungs.

)o(

Yeah I planned to update before today but then I had a AsoIaF related meltdown, so that didn't happen... sorry!