We arrive in the Capitol much too soon and I have a hard time letting Katniss go, even if it's only to go get ready for the tribute parade."Remember, just let them do their thing, okay? They only mean well, I swear."
Cinna has it all worked out down to the last minute so Katniss and I can share my old prep team. It's not how things are usually done, but I don't want Katniss with strangers nor give up my team. Octavia, Venia and Flavius are excited, but have their somber moments, assuring me Katniss will be just fine, then getting excited about another pair of siblings winnig in succesive years a la Cashmere and Gloss.
"And a Quell winner, too,"Octavia gushes,"Victor of the third Quarter Quell and her sister, the youngest victor we ever had. Can't you just picture it?"
Mean as it might be, I'm very relieved when they declare me as ready and leave me alone.
Once, they're gone, Effie enters the room, carrying my outfit in a bag."Cinna's still with Katniss,"she says apologetically,"but we'll do just fine, won't we?"
I agree, and we sit down for a quick lunch before we get started.
"You'll have a quick interview first,"Effie tells me. I know this already, she's told me, but I let her go through the schedule again anyways. It calms us both, somehow."And then we're off to the gathering place. As you can imagine, it will be a bit different than last year."
Yes, there's never been this many victors as personally invested in the Games as this year...
It's not long before Effie decides I should put my dress on. Once she pulls it from the bag, I can't help but gasp. Cinna has once again outdone himself, but this time, he might have stepped too far. My hands trembling, I slip the dress over my head and step infront of the mirror. My first thought wasn't wrong. The dress is wonderful and yet dangerous for two reasons: The gossamer gown, with wings and all, is an obvious nod to Rue. But my dress is, for the most, darker, the material resembling feathers. I lift my arms and the wings move as if they were a part of me rather than the gown.
Tears pool in my eyes as I stare at my reflection. Cinna has turned my into a mockingjay. For Rue. For all children. For the rebels who must still fight and die and burn Snow's world to the ground.
Effie's next to me by the time the first sob wrenches itself from my protesting throat, her arms around me, rocking my as if I were a small child. I cry uncontrollably for as long as I dare, then pull away from Effie, wiping at my eyes furiously.
"Oh, I ruined my face,"I say, just for the sake of saying something. But I do look a mess. I'm supposed to be strong for my sister, I'm a symbol of rebellion. If I can't even hold it together over a dress, how do I expect to help bring down Snow? I'm still just a stupid little girl with no idea what she's actually doing. I want to cry some more, hide away and pretend none of this is real, but I can't. Instead, I force myself to breath calmly.
"No matter,"Effie says gently,"We'll have a cup of tea and then there's still plenty of time to get you ready."
Only once I'm somewhat calmed down, holding a steaming mug close to my chest, do I realise something."Effie? Did you plan in time for that?"
She gives me a slightly sheepish grin."Well, dear, taking care of my victors is what I do. You get a feeling for when someone's almost at their breaking point. No point to let that mess up our schedule."
I laugh and move to sit closer to her. Because I know what she's really saying. I love you. I'm here for you.
I don't have to do this all alone.
My interview is tedious and I'm nervous the whole time, but Effie and Cinna assure me I did fine.
"Katniss has a lot in store for you,"I tell the cameras, but really, I'm talking to the sponsors,"And we'll definitely see an interesting alliance, but I won't say more. I really shan't spoil all the fun!"
They laugh at that and I know I have them intrigued. Whatever Haymitch is planning, I still have to have my backup. And that means sponsors. So I smile.
Then it's time to go to the bottom level of the remake Centre, where the tributes are prepared for the chariot ride.
Effie, Cinna and Portia are gone to check on Madge and Katniss and bring them down, but I go ahead already. The place is crawling with victors, some even introducing their tributes to those of other districts. Alliances are already forming.
Marina from Four is talking to Jonsa, who looks both horrified and pleased at being thought out by the Career. Maybe she'll get an offer to join their pack if her score is good enough. She's tall and muscular enough, and interesting in terms of sponsorship...
Olive catches my eye from where she's standing with her aunt and gives me a curt nod. I return it but before I can decided whether or not to got talk to them, I'm grabbed by the arm. I turn around to find Curie staring at me intently. She doesn't introduce herself or utter any greeting at all, her eyes on mine, then flicking to my dress and my pin.
And suddenly she's talking, her voice soft but clear."With rue my heart is laden for golden friends I had, for many a rose-lipt maiden and many a lightfoot lad. By brooks too broad for leaping the lightfoot boys are laid; the rose-lipt girls are sleeping in fields where roses fade."
I blink back tears, the meaning of her words clear, even if I'm not sure why she speaks the way she does. Maybe it has something to do with the trauma she suffered years ago. They did say she was different.
I take her hand and squeez it gently."Thank you, Curie."
She squeezes my hand in return and runs of, leaving me to myself again.
)o(
sorry for the nonexistent update last week, but 1) internet sucked and 2) I was sick (yes still in boarding school how lame)
but I managed this week yay