Chapter 29
The noise in the hall had wakened Fiona. She quickly checked on Ezra but the child was still blissfully asleep. She pulled on her robe and stepped out into the hall. A lamp was kept on the narrow hall table all night and by its glow, she quietly walked and saw Hoss' bedroom door was wide-open. Fiona hesitated but peeked in and saw the Missus lying in Hoss Carwtright's huge bed; it almost swallowed her. Had Fiona not grown to know Mr. Hoss so well over the past few months, she might have been scandalized at finding his brother's wife asleep in his room, warmly tucked in but Fiona knew better. Something was wrong, terribly wrong. She walked further and to the open door of the Mister's bedroom and peeked in; it was empty and still dark, the hall light allowing her to see through the shadows that the bed was unmade, the covers tossed aside.
"They've gone after Darby," Fiona whispered to the emptiness of the room. If anything happened to her brother—well, Fiona couldn't bear the thought. Despite his flaws, he was her brother and had always seen to her well-being. And yet, he would have to answer for his crime—the laws of the country demanded that and up until now, Fiona had always felt self-righteous about it. There had always been a definite right or wrong in her mind but there had always been mitigating circumstances—at least that's what Darby had explained to her the first time they stole a shank of mutton from a butcher.
"Now you tell me, sister-child, you saw all the slabs of meat he has in the shop, didn't you, girl?" Fiona had nodded. "And you and me, little Ralph and Turley and Bridey, we're all hungry, right?" Fiona nodded again. "It's not right we should be starvin' while he sells his wares to the rich and has a heavy thumb at that! He's a thief—wanting more than what he should receive-but we're just tryin' to live; we're not thieves. And if it weren't for them cursed British lords and ladies what think they own even the ground on which we stand, we'd have gold coins in our pockets enough and buy all the mutton and pork and apples we could eat." Fiona wasn't quite sure about the logic of Darby's argument but as a six year old girl, she didn't argue. Instead, she did what Darby asked her to do next, to pocket as many apples as she could when he "accidentally" fell against the apple stand and knocked it over. So while the shopkeeper yelled at Darby and swung the business end of a broom at him, Fiona and all the other street children hustled and pocketed and grabbed as many apples as they could, one child even shoving one between his teeth and holding it like a roasted pig.
Fiona pondered what to do about her brother and the Cartwrights. Was she a man, she would ride out and warn her brother—he was her blood and she did love him. She knew that any of the Cartwrights would help each other out in any situation but she wasn't a Cartwright, just a girl who could barely stay on the back of one of those behemoths, so much as try to find her way about in the trees and stretches of pastureland. She knew she had to be gone that day; the Mister had made that all too clear. Mr. Ben Cartwright had already paid her—more pay than she deserved. She had demurred but he insisted she take it.
"But after what I've done, sir..." Fiona looked at the money in her hands. "It's not right I take it."
Ben had tipped up Fiona's chin. Tears glistened in her eyes. "It's difficult for me to see things how a girl your age would, Fiona, but I understand that you're young and when a person's young, well, it's difficult to make the right decision about many things. Actually, it's never easy, no matter how old we are, to know what the right thing to do is. You've taken care of Ezra well and I know you love him and he loves you. Were it up to me I might even allow you to stay on because children need those who love them around them—and there can never be too many. But Adam, well, that's another thing entirely. The way he feels about those he loves, Adam would never be able to see you and think of anything other than Sylvia and her condition when he found her and of the loss they both suffered." Ben sighed. He and Hop Sing would do their best to take care of Ezra until Sylvia was well and could do so. But could she do so? Ben hoped she could. But nothing altered the fact that he would be running after his grandson and helping bathe him and putting him down for his naps and feeding hm. "It takes a young person to raise a baby," Ben had told Hop Sing about Fiona's dismissal and how he would need Hop Sing's help.
Despite Ben's expectations, Hop Sing did not crow over Fiona's dismissal. They had actually come to an accord, especially when Hop Sing realized that he wasn't able to move as quickly anymore, not with the tenderness and swellings in his knees. His ginger teas and poultices were only a minimal help for the painful stiffness and once when he tried to chase after Ezra in the back yard to keep the boy away from the sty, his knees screamed every time he hit the ground in stride. But he had caught the child and tucked him under his arms to carry him back to safety. And Ezra had shouted his frustration at being snatched away just as he was about to explore another part of his empire.
Fiona went back to the nursery and pulled out her valise. She had more clothes now than when she had arrived so she pulled out a travel dress she hadn't yet worn it and as she looked at it, she remembered the day she bought it. The Mister had taken her to town and when she was through with her shopping, he had treated her at Mrs. McCrory's tea house, The Cozy. Fiona had giggled to watch the Mister holding the delicate bone china cup decorated with painted flowers and eating a tea sandwich in one bite. He was the only man in the room with its floral curtains and lacy table covers and he added a disturbing masculine element to the surroundings
Fiona lay the dress on the bed; it was pretty and the most expensive dress she had. Then she went to the dresser and picked up the business envelope lying on top. Mr. Ben was sending her to Sacramento with a letter of recommendation; his hope was that perhaps she could secure a job as ether a nanny or a companion to an elderly woman. Those positions were distinctly mentioned in the letter. Fiona put it flat in the bottom of the valise and began to take her clothes from drawers and the closet to pack and soon the sun was up and Ezra began to waken.
"Good mornin', you handsome boy." Fiona stood by the side of the crib and smiled at the child who rolled on his back and grinned up at her. Then he pulled himself up to a standing position and began to babble at her, rising on his toes. "So, you want out, do you? And I'm sure you need a change too." Fiona lifted him up and placed him on the bed, taking his lovey along. He tried to turn over so he could crawl down but Fiona, taking the lovey, made growling noises while she touched his nose with it. Ezra laughed and reached for the toy and Fiona gave it to him and then proceeded to change his diaper. When she finished, she picked him up and kissed his cheek.
"I don't know if your grampa is awake yet, so I'll feed you your breakfast." Her voice broke when it really hit her that this would be her last morning on the Ponderosa and she had no one to blame but herself. Fiona sat Ezra on her hip and carried him downstairs and into the kitchen.
Hop Sing was busying himself with breakfast. He glanced at the kitchen entrance when he heard a noise and when Ezra saw the cook, he crowed with delight.
"Good morning, little Cartwright," Hop Sing said. "I have hot cereal just for you." He put out his arms and Fiona handed Ezra to him. She watched while Hop Sing sat Ezra in his chair and then placed a bowl of farina cooked with milk in front of him. "Now, Hop Sing feed you and you eat all of it and grow as big as Uncle Hoss."
The bacon was popping in the fry pan and Fiona went to turn the thick slices. Hop Sing was in a quandary. Ben had told him that Fiona was leaving and that both he and Hop Sing would be tending to Ezra until Sylvia was better—and probably even then. It's wasn't that Ben thought that Sylvia was inept, he explained to Hop Sing, but she has never taken care of Ezra before by herself; she may need them. But he was the cook and needed to take care of the food as well.
"I cook breakfast," Hop Sing said standing, "you feed Ezra. Okay?"
"That would be fine," Fiona said and then sat down in Hop Sing's vacant chair and continued to feed Ezra who often tried to wrest the spoon away from her once his initial hunger was sated. And he also insisted on holding the cup of milk as he drank, voicing his displeasure when she tried to hold it instead. So when Ben Cartwright came down to breakfast, he saw a sight he never thought he would; Hop Sing and Fiona were chatting as if they had always been boon companions, the odors of brewed coffee, bacon and biscuits filled the air along with Ezra's chortles of happiness.