Hello! First of all, I would like to apologize for waiting this long to post this chapter. Like the other chapters, I reread it over and over again, changing little parts here and there. Not to mention, with life in general being very busy at the moment. With that being said, I do have the next few chapters finished and hopefully those will be up soon! :)

This chapter was one that I had drastically changed from what I originally wrote. It follows right after the episode "Allegiance" ended. Little by little their true feelings start showing themselves, but it's always something that holds them back from telling each other the truth. I hope you enjoy it! With all of the work that came with it, it was a joy to tear down and build this chapter back up (and hopefully it was for the better)!

Allegiance:

A chime sounded off in his quarters as Jean Luc was sitting at his desk reading over his reports. Too engrossed with the crew's reports on what had happened with his doppelganger, he brusquely replied with a simple, "Come," but did not look up when his guest came in.

"Interesting read?"

Tearing his eyes away from the report, Jean Luc looked up to see Beverly standing in front of his desk. Lifting an eyebrow, he threw the PADD on his desk and quipped, "You can say that."

She held up her own PADD and said, "Here are the medical scans from the imposter Picard. The aliens did a great job recreating you, right down to your finger prints and blood type, however…"

His interest piqued. "However…?"

Beverly smiled, "However, when I looked closely, your cell structure and DNA patterns were different. When I did the physical, I didn't think to examine you that closely. In fact, it's not required for a yearly physical." Crossing her arms, she looked thoughtful. "It was as if he took information from your last physical and recreated everything."

"Hmm…" Standing up, he made his way around his desk and sat on the corner facing Beverly. Shaking his head, he crossed his arms and murmured, "Apparently his attitude wasn't as precise as the way they made my body." He turned around and picked up the PADD,"I ordered the ship to a dangerous pulsar risking the lives of everyone on this ship. And for what?" He threw the PADD down again on his desk. Raising his voice, he let his anger get to him. "Just so that they could experiment on us in their foolish idea of a laboratory." Bracing himself by placing his hands on his desk, he let out a deep breath as his shoulders slumped in defeat.

After a quiet moment, Beverly placed a gentle hand on his shoulder and firmly said, "Jean Luc, we caught him just in time. We knew it wasn't you, but with the chain of command, we were bound to follow regulations. You know that just as much as everyone else – and you know that we trust you. That man was not you and in the end, their dubious behavior was discovered." Gently lifting his chin with two fingers, she kindly whispered,"You have a smart bridge crew and you should be proud of them."

While letting her words sink in, he allowed himself for a moment to get lost in the oceans of her eyes. Feeling her withdraw her hand, he straightened himself and stiffly tucked down his uniform jacket. "I appreciate your kind words, Beverly. I have complete faith in my crew - I'm just upset that it went that far." Taking a deep breath, he crossed his arms against his chest and looked back at the doctor. "Now I read in Commander Riker's report that my doppelganger had dinner with you and had acted odd, but you didn't specify with him what he did to get your suspicion roused. Can you be more specific with me, Doctor?"

Crossing her arms protectively across her chest, Beverly bit the side of her lip for a moment. "Well… to be honest Jean Luc, I didn't think it was pertinent to explain every detail to Commander Riker."

Instantly thinking the worse, he squinted his eyes and whispered, "Did he force you to do anything?"

Beverly shook her head. "No he didn't, but… it's quite embarrassing, I must say." She looked up to find Jean Luc's undivided attention. She licked her lips and quietly said, "We kissed each other."

Feeling his mouth twitch as he tried to hide his laughter, Jean Luc shook his head, "Beverly, we have kissed numerous times before. What made this different?"

She rolled her eyes. "After we kissed, he… he kicked me out of your quarters."

Jean Luc stared at her with a small smirk playing on his lips. "And…?"

Beverly looked confused, "And what?"

"And how did he kiss? Was it the same? Was it different?" Letting his hands fall to the edge of his desk, he crossed his legs. "I mean, obviously I would never force you out of my quarters if we were in a loving embrace."

Beverly took a deep breath as she tried to keep herself from blushing, "I can't believe I'm having this conversation with you on who's the better kisser, you or your doppelganger!"

He held up his finger, "Ahh, but you didn't answer my question."

She dramatically sighed, "When he kissed me, it almost felt like it was new to him." Then she leaned in and beckoned him with her finger. When they were close, she whispered, "And truth be told, it was a little sloppy." Leaning back, she felt her smile reach her eyes and quietly said, "You don't slobber and I've noticed that you don't like to stay in one area. You do, however, focus on my neck."

Jean Luc felt his ears turn red. "I didn't know you had an ongoing analysis."

"Well women usually do Jean Luc." She relaxed her hands in front of her.

Jean Luc was mesmerized for a moment, not being able to say a word. Once again, he allowed himself to get lost in her eyes. He found it to be quite soothing. Bracing himself against his desk, he looked down at the carpet. Quietly inhaling air as if it were to give him all the courage in the universe, he whispered, "If I may be frank with you Beverly, I'm sorry I wasn't here to enjoy it myself. I certainly would have never rejected you." He glanced at her, hoping to still see her smiling – but he was sadly mistaken.

Bringing her arms defensively across her chest, her shining smile slid into an impassive frown. "Well Captain, I have to go." Doing everything in her power not to run from his quarters, she turned towards the doors and started to make her way out.

Not wanting her to run away, he sidestepped in front of her and placed both his hands on her shoulders. "Please, you don't have to. But I can't deny the fact that my doppelganger was able to be this close to you yet you can't wait to run out of the door when you're with me."

Beverly's brow furrowed as she shook her head. "You know that has nothing to do-"

"It has everything to do with it," Jean Luc sternly interrupted. Taking a deep breath, he held in his abrupt anger. "Ever since coming back from Starfleet Medical, anytime that we have been alone in a room together, you are in a hurry to leave as if I had contracted a horrible, debilitating disease. However, the one night you stay and are comfortable enough to show affection, it is not with me but someone who looks and sounds like me." Mirthlessly chuckling to himself, he slid his hands down to her arms and clasps her hands tightly. Looking down at their hands, he didn't trust himself to find solace in her eyes – not when all she could see when she looked into his was heartache. "The irony of this situation is astounding. Don't you think?"

Feeling slightly ashamed, Beverly also looked down at their intertwined hands and quietly said, "I'm sorry for making you feel that way." She shook her head and looked up. Noticing that he still wasn't looking at her, she slipped her hand out of his grasp and placed it gently on his cheek. "That was never my intention, Jean Luc and I am deeply sorry."

Feeling the warmth spread within his body and temporarily hiding his heartache, Jean Luc finally looked at Beverly. Seeing her sincerity staring back at him, he quietly nodded, cleared his voice and said, "Tell me what happened that night." Letting go of her hands, he took a step back and leaned against his desk.

Staring at him for a moment, she contemplated if she should tell him everything - she didn't want to alienate him any further."He invited me to dinner after his physical. I thought that our dinner was going to be more casual but when I walked in I was caught by surprise by the ambiance he created."

Crossing his arms across his chest as to keep the jealousy within his soul, Jean Luc darkly asked, "How so?"

Nervously biting the inside of her lip, she said, "The lights were low and he had set out candles. Next to our dinner, he had a bottle of wine chilling with one glass already waiting for me."

His eyebrow perked as he tried to keep the sarcasm out of his voice. "And yet you didn't run."

Slowly shaking her head, she said, "No. I don't know what, but something was pulling me in." Sighing to herself, she crossed her arms. "I guess I knew deep down that something was not right and I wanted to figure it out. Like I had said before, your physical came out perfectly normal, but the way you were acting was different. You were more comfortable and relaxed – a side of you I haven't seen in a long time."

Jean Luc thought back to all of the private moments they had shared since returning to the Enterprise and he was surprised to find that she was right. All those moments he had wanted to tell her everything but was too scared to do so. "A side of you I also haven't seen in a while."

Again, feeling slightly ashamed, she briefly looked down at the floor. After gathering her thoughts, she looked back at him and resumed. "All throughout dinner, we were cordial – making small talk about different missions and the crew." Placing a finger over her lips, she squinted her eyes. "In fact, now that I think about it, he was only asking the questions." Now feeling deeply ashamed of herself, she closed her eyes and shook her head. "How could I have been so stupid?"

Standing up, Jean Luc reached out and touched her arm. "Beverly, you didn't-"

Opening her eyes and shaking her head firmly, she quietly said, "No, I should have known then."

Gently rubbing her arm, he gently said, "Please don't pull yourself down as to what could have or should have happened. You're only going to pull yourself down into a deep, dark hole that will seem impossible to escape from."

Feeling the warmth from his hand comfort the darkest corner of her soul, she breathed, "Is that from personal experience?"

Feeling their connection burn with electricity, he slowly nodded and murmured, "Yes."

Despite the luxury of their connection, she knew that what she said next would hurt him badly. "After dinner, he asked me why we had not moved our relationship into something more personal. I should have known then." She placed her hand over his and gently squeezed it.

A little sliver of hope passed through his eyes as he glanced up and asked, "What did you tell him?"

Giving a slight shake of her head, in one swoop she cut his hope away. "That I was comfortable with our relationship as it was and that I didn't see it growing into anything more than friendship. And then he asked me to dance."

Slipping his hand out of her grasp, he silently cursed himself for the millionth time for walking out of her door. Swallowing his hurt from her dejection, he cleared his throat and hoarsely asked, "You danced with him?"

Hearing his voice falter and seeing a wave of sorrow pass through his eyes, she wanted nothing more than to tell him the truth – that there was nothing more she wanted than to be with him and to tell him everything. But she held back. The events from that night he rejected her still ran deep. "Yes and then we kissed; and, well, you know how that went."

"Hmm…" Grasping his hands behind his back, he took a deep breath,"Did he give a reason as to why he rejected you?"

Nonchalantly, Beverly shrugged her shoulder and said, "Just that it was late and that perhaps I was correct as to keep our relationship the way it was." She tried to keep her voice light but even she knew, he would not be fooled.

Jean Luc exhaled and shook his head. "Beverly, you don't even seem convinced that we should keep our relationship just as it is now. And the fact that he was suitable with your answer is the most despicable act he has committed thus far."Quickly turning towards his desk, he clenched his fists so tight that he could feel his nails digging into his skin. "Why can't you see?" Feeling his blood boiling beneath his skin, he took a few deep breaths to calm his back around, he held out his hands and exclaimed,"I don't want our relationship to stay the way it is right now!" Closing the gap between them within a few steps, Jean Luc gently placed his hands on her cheeks."If I could do it all over again, I would have never left your quarters that night."

Feeling the oddly exhilarating yet constricting air crushing around her throat, Beverly felt her heart soar to new and exciting heights. However, her mind remembering how it felt when he dejected her gained control over her body."Jean Lu—"

Feeling his courage take over his body, he lightly touched the bottom of her lip. "I was a fool Beverly and I have been walking across the universe to show you that I am the man you want me to be. I am asking – no, pleading for you to give me one more chance." Sliding his hand around her neck, he lightly kissed her lips. "I won't fail you and I have no intention of walking away." Kissing her once more, he gave himself the courage to tell her what he has never said to any other woman. Staring deep into her sapphire eyes, he felt his body relax. "Beverly, I am deeply in lo-"

Feeling her hands act on their own accord, Beverly abruptly pushed him away. Feeling the tears sting her eyes, she shook her head as she tried to catch her breath within her throat. "I'm sorry." Turning away, she dashed out of his quarters. Thankful for the late hour, she made it to her quarters without bypassing anyone on the way.

Staring at the closed door in utter shock, Jean Luc felt his heart slide to the floor. Turning away towards his desk, he briskly walked over and sat down. Feeling his shock turn into anger, he grabbed one of the PADDs off of his desk and tried to ignore the stinging pain engulfing his heart. After reading the same sentence five times, he realized that it was the information Beverly brought to him. Just thinking of her name caused him to throw the PADD across the room breaking one of the vases on the side table. Not yet feeling his anger satisfied, he quickly stood up and in one swoop; he pushed everything off of his desk. Pounding his fist on the desk, he closed his eyes as he tried to calm himself down.

She keeps pushing and pushing...Why can't she see the love I have for her?

"Damn it!"

Taking a deep breath, he slumped back in his chair. Pinching the bridge of his nose, he closed his eyes as his anger fell away to hurt.

Maybe there is a deeper reason as to why she keeps pushing me away. Is it possible that she is in love with another man?

Jean Luc snapped his head up and replayed the conversation they had after coming back from Rutia. Rick Chechney. She never answered my question on if they had been romantically involved while she was at Starfleet Medical. Could it be that she is in love with him?

Leaning his head against his fists, he closed his eyes. Taking a few deep breaths, he built his imaginary wall around his heart to shield away his hurt and betrayal, all the while pushing his jealousy further into the darkest corners of his soul.

This was nothing new to him – this was his routine since the first day he met her, which was coincidentally the day he found out that she was to marry his best friend.

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