Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Nakamura Shungiku (well, besides the guys from the printing department)

Author's note: Well, as you can see: Rating's gone up!

This chapter contains man-on-man action, so if you don't like it, don't read it! (although I hardly believe that people who don't like it look up the M-rated section of yaoi-manga fanfiction)

This chapter took awfully long because I had to edit it a million times - and I'm still not satisfied with it. But hey, at least it's long!

Thanks for reviews, follows and favs!

Dignity

When Yokozawa entered the unfamiliar apartment, an unbearable smell hit him the second he crossed the threshold. For a moment he entertained the idea of either turning on the heel and leaving, or pinching his nose the whole time he was forced to be here. The latter was out of question, and if he just left he would break his promise and have to explain to Hiyori why he was still carrying the bento when he came back home.

He sighed and tried to ignore the smell as best as he could, but it was hopeless. The mixture of fastfood, sweat and thick air was nauseating, and he really needed to find a window to open first of all.

"I'm sorry for disturbing!", he announced into the emptiness of the genkan and took off his shoes to line them up next to five other pairs.

The first door to his right stood ajar, and a thin ray of light showed him that somebody seemed to be in this room. As he entered it, another wave of 'Oh my god, I am passing out' hit him.

In the middle of the room there was a big table - or at least something he assumed to be a table - that was covered with all kinds of stationary, paper, tones, ink, empty paper cups and leftover food. Three people were working on their respective stacks of paper, and none of them looked up.

They just hadn't noticed him, he guessed. Their faces were pale and their cheekbones were sticking out as if they hadn't ate for weeks. A young woman with round glasses stared down at the page she was working on. While her cutter was scratching across the tone, she kept murmuring the same thing over and over, and the third time Yokozawa could understand her words.

"Just when I left Yoshikawa-sensei's apartment, they called me here. This is worse than jumping out of the frying pan into the fire. It's like jumping straight into hell..."

Yokozawa cleared his throat. "Good evening. I came to..."

He stopped as one of the assistants slipped from his chair and came crawling to him like a zombie. With a weak grip, he wrapped his arms around Yokozawa's leg and tried to pull himself up.

"Are you the new assistant?", he whispered in a hopeful yet dry voice, and looked at him with teary eyes. "Please help us...!"

In an attempt to get rid of the pale man, Yokozawa shook his leg. "Let go, will you? I came to bring you something more nutritious than burgers and gyuudon."

Again lifeless eyes were turned on him. "Ah, so you're Kirishima-san's boyfriend."

Blood rushed to his face at high speed, and he already regretted having answered to Kirishima's phone call in the first place. "What the?! Did he say that?"

"I don't mind. You could be a yakuza boss and I wouldn't mind. We won't survive tonight anyway." Suddenly the assistant broke into tears and rubbed his face against the leg of Yokozawa's pants. "We tried to call Takahashi-kun", he sobbed, "But only his landlord answered and we couldn't reach him at all! Our last chance was Takahashi-kun, and now we're doomed! I hope you brought some sushi. I'd like sushi as my last supper..."

Yokozawa took a step back and watched the man tumble over like a dead body with a frown. "Where is Kirishima?"

The female assistant looked up for the first time. "I... I think he's in front of Ijuuin-sensei's bedroom."

"I see. Here, grab a bite. I brought onigiri, salad, soup and some sweets", he said and put the bag onto the table. "Kirishima's daughter prepared it for you, so be grateful and eat properly."

As he left the room, he could hear the rustling of the three assistants jumping at the food like hungry wolves. Yes, this was definitely a zombie-movie.

When he turned around the corner, he saw Kirishima, sitting on the floor and sticking tones to the manuscript while talking to the door next to him.

"Sensei, would you please get your act together and leave your bedroom? Don't you think that you're being rude by locking yourself up while we're working on YOUR manuscript?"

"That's what I have assistants for", came a muffled voice from the other side of the wood.

Kirishima sighed. "We talked this over a hundred times now. As long as you don't finish the last two pages, there are limits to what we can do on our side. Even if we get the tones and inking done in time, we cannot hand in an unfinished manuscript."

"I don't care. This is my manga after all."

"And this is my magazine. Come on, it's only two pages!", he said in a firm voice, but didn't receive any further reply.

"Still no progress?", Yokozawa asked and looked to the door.

Kirishima wiped both hands across his face and stood up. He gave his legs a thorough patting, since they had been about to go numb. "It's hopeless. This time getting through to him seems to be impossible. I've been talking to Ijuuin-sensei for hours now, and all I got was a tirade of swear words."

For a moment Yokozawa stared at his face intensely, then he lifted his hand and peeled a piece of tone off his lover's cheek. "When's the deadline?"

"In six hours. If he started drawing now, we might be able to make it in time, but I think I'm at my wit's end."

"You're kidding me?", Yokozawa snorted. "Kirishima Zen accepts defeat? All the time you act high and mighty, and then some whiny mangaka turns up and you throw in the towel?"

But his partner only shrugged and looked at him with tired eyes. "I've been talking to him for almost nine hours now and our conversation keeps repeating itself. I'm already asking too much of the assistants as it is, so they might as well go home and get some rest."

"You need some rest as well. You smell like a trashcan."

"Always nice to hear comforting words from my sweetheart."

Yokozawa heaved a sigh as he made up his mind, as to how to handle the situation. What was intented to be a knock on the bedroom door came out as a fist hitting the door full-force several times. "Oi, did you hear what your editor said? He's not going to push you any more this time."

"That's fine then!", came the childish response.

"Anyway, the magazine doesn't belong to only him", he continued and raised his voice. "My name is Yokozawa and I'm in charge of selling your shitty cooking-manga. If you adhere to such antics, the only reason for a bookstore to order more of the next tankobon will be to fill the shelves, because "Za Kan Vol.12" will only be half of the usual volume! So get your lazy ass out of there and draw the fucking last two pages!"

"I don't mind!"

Kirishima rubbed his shoulder, attempting to calm him down. "It's okay, Yokozawa. It's just a waste of time, no matter how long you try."

Suddenly Yokozawa remembered a name he had heard before, and decided to ask about it. "Who's Takahashi-kun, by the way?"

"Takahashi-kun, ne", he repeated and combed his fingers through his locks. "He's a part-timer at our section."

"Was he expected to be here today?"

"Well, that's a long story..."

"If you start your answer like this, then I am sure I can put it to use now." Following his own announcement, he turned his head towards the door again. "Honestly, I'm not surprised that Takahashi-kun didn't want to come. Who wants to work with a mangaka who's using his assistants in such a shameful way? 'What a poor way to show your loyalty to the ones who are giving their best to make your work successful', he's probably thinking."

He was almost hit by the door when it was flung open, but managed to dodge it the last possible moment. Standing in front of him was...

Well, what exactly?

Yokozawa knew that this must be Ijuuin Kyou, but he looked like the male version of one of those girl ghosts from Japanese horror movies. His black hair covered almost all of his face, his skin was paperwhite, the clothes dirty with food and ink. And he smelt like rotten eggs. Without a word, the mangaka passed them by and vanished into the room, where Yokozawa had left the assistants with the food he had brought.

Kirishima followed him with his eyes, his jaw sinking lower with every second. "Oh my god, Yokozawa. You're a genius!"

"Frankly speaking, I have no idea what I actually did."

"Believe me, you're great", he replied and leaned forward to give him a peck on the cheek.

Yokozawa waited for him to pull back, but it didn't happen. The lips were still resting on his skin motionlessly. "...Kirishima-san?"

"You smell so good. Like a rose on a dumping ground."

He snorted. "What luck that you aren't working for the 'Emerald'."

A long sigh escaped his mouth before he finally straightened his back. "Now that sensei has left his cave, I should get back to work before he changes his mind. Thank you."

"Right, let's get back to the others", he said and made his way to the study, closely followed by a confused editor.

"Are you saying that you're planning to stay?"

"Of course. I figured that you'd be happy about every helping hand, so I asked your mother to have a look at Hiyo-chan. She was already asleep when I left anyway, so there shouldn't be a problem."

Kirishima caught his waist with both hands from behind and forced him to stop. "Are you doing this for me or for Sales?"

"What a stupid question is that?", he hissed and pried himself free, so he could go into the room where the others were waiting for their editor to return. "I do it for the readers, of course."

Smiling, Kirishima pulled up a chair, looked into the tired faces of the others and seemed to burst with enthusiasm. "Well then, Amano-kun, would you give Yokozawa a cutting knife? Then let's get started!"

It was past four in the morning when Yokozawa and Kirishima arrived at Marukawa. The halls were completely empty and only a few lights were turned on.

"This is creepy", the older man mumbled as they rode the elevator to the floor where the printing department was located. "I see Marukawa in the early morning about 6 times a year..."

"... everytime Ijuuin-sensei has to hand in a new chapter, I guess..."

"... and it's always scary as hell. Maybe, because after two days of being awake your mind starts playing weird tricks on you."

The elevator doors opened and both made a startled jump backwards when they saw a gloomy man standing in front of them. Obviously not only the assistants had been suffering from Ijuuin's delay.

"Hey, you freaked me out just now!", Kirishima gasped and theatrically clasped his chest. "Don't do this to an old man like me."

This was answered with a tired face and a twitch of the corner of the man's mouth, probably an attempted smile. He failed at it. "Kirishima-san, we tried to call you several times. The printing representative in charge wants to have a word with you."

"That smells like a shitload of trouble", the editor grumbled as they followed the man inside the department and to one of the desks in the middle of the room, where an angry-looking man was waiting for them. Both of them knew him. Yonehara from Printing was famous, for the same reasons Yokozawa from Sales was famous: He was skilled, and he flew off the handle quite often.

Yokozawa looked at Yonehara, sitting at his desk and eyeing the two of them with a serious glare, and he felt like a child about to being scolded. This was humiliating.

"Here's the manuscript", Kirishima announced, as he put down the portfolio onto the table. "Thank you for your cooperation."

"It's not going into this month's printing."

For a moment, silence filled the room, until the editor managed a tired chuckle. "Come on, Yonehara. Don't pull such lame jokes on me."

To emphasize his words, the printing representative picked up the manuscript and offered it to him. "Come back with this next month. We're about to start printing, and any changes are not negotiable."

Suddenly Kirishima's friendly mask dropped. His partner had expected him to look pissed, but all he could see in his face was defeat, and clearly their opponent noticed it too.

"But you could change it... if you wanted", Kirishima started a final attempt.

"Sure we could, but it's not our obligation to put up with your author's whims, and he has to learn, as much as you have to learn, that we from Printing are not your servants."

Yes, this obviously was a scolding, used to demonstrate who had the upper hand here.

Again the salesman looked to the man standing next to him, the very moment he raised a hand and covered his face with a deep groan. In any other situation, maybe at another daytime and with less sleep deprivation, things might have taken a different turn. But now he looked so defeated and mortified, that Yokozawa was struck by a strange mix of pity and anger. After all, this wasn't how his lover was supposed to look. This wasn't what he or any of the assistants deserved.

Finally he made a step forward, shoving Kirishima aside. "May I remind you that decisions of that kind have to be made together with Sales?"

Yonehara looked up at him and let out a small yawn. "We already chose a substitute comic chapter of the same length, so the amount of paper and ink used will be the same. But if you insist, here you go: Dear Yokozawa-san from Sales, due to the time pressure and preparation procedures, we want to use another manga instead of "Za Kan", which we plan to postpone for 'Japun's' next month's edition. Do we get your Okay?"

"You won't."

He felt a tug on his right sleeve, followed by a whispered "It's enough, Yokozawa. This time I'll retreat and let them have their way. Maybe they're right after all..."

Quickly he pulled back his arm. "I don't remember having asked for your opinion, Kirishima-san."

"But he's right", Yonehara said with a cocky smile and leaned back into his chair. "It would be too much a hassle to change the prepared data now, and we might even lose money by doing so."

That was the point when Yokozawa lost it. He slammed both hands onto the top of the table and leaned forward, until their eyes were almost at the same height. "What a nice reminder! I remember sitting in the print-run decision meeting, which you did not attend, of course! Otherwise you would know that 'Japun' gets a higher print-run when a new chapter of 'Za Kan' is included. We're making our decisions based on these things, while all that you see is paper and ink. If you really think that you can do as you please this time, then go ahead! Now that I officially told you that Sales won't support your proposal, we're not going to take any responsibility." He retrieved the portfolio from Kirishima's hands and put it on the table once again. "But if 100,000 copies or more will be left over, I'll be glad to chop off your head and present it to Finance. That is assuming, that they don't rip you a new one before I get my hands on you. It's up to you."

He turned on the heel and started walking to the exit. Even as he heard fast steps approach, he didn't bother to look back.

"Yokozawa, you didn't have to..."

"Don't get this wrong", he interrupted him quickly. "It's my responsibility to decline such stupid requests. If they want to give you a wipe that badly, they should better not involve Sales in this."

Instead of riding the elevator, he opened the door leading to the staircase and went ahead. For some reason that he didn't know himself, he couldn't look at Kirishima's face now. He could still feel an undefinable anger deep down in his stomach, eating away at him ceaselessly.

"Wait for a tired man!", Kirishima behind him requested and stumbled down the stairs as well. He managed to catch up with his lover when they reached ground level. "Let's go home together and get some sleep."

"I'll go back to my own place. Go home, take the day off and try to save yourself as much dignity as you still have left at this point."

The sound of steps behind him came to a sudden halt, and the very same moment he could feel something heavy pressing from the inside of his chest. For once, Yokozawa was shocked by his own words, but he felt unable to take them back or add something to make them less... hurtful.

"You go back by taxi, I'm fine with the train", he murmured and left the building, the heaviness inside him growing even worse when behind him all he could hear was silence.

After having slept for about three hours, Yokozawa had gotten up to take a shower and go to work.

He was still feeling tired and exhausted, although he knew for a fact that this was not only due to the all-nighter they had pulled at Ijuuin's place. The words he had said to Kirishima were still stuck in his mind and felt worse with every passing minute.

Needless to say, his mood was not a very good one, and it took his co-workers and subordinates less than five minutes to pick up on that. Always when the other members of his department felt that it might be a bad day to come close to him, they would send Henmi to him, because he was the only one who never seemed to mind it much. Sometimes Yokozawa wondered if Henmi had a terrible bitch-girlfriend waiting at home, so that every other opponent was no challenge to him anymore.

Today was one of those days when Henmi would approach his desk quite a few times, always with different documents and questions. After the sixth or seventh time Yokozawa looked at his subordinate with a serious face and told him to let the others know that, if there was something they wanted, they had to come to him directly. If they didn't want to, then they should come at him again the following day.

He waited for another hour - nobody approached him then - before he took his coat and bag and decided to make a stop at some bookstores before going...

Well, where did he intend to go? As much as he wanted to go and check up on Hiyori and Kirishima, he couldn't help but to think that he was in no position to visit them lightly. First, he had to think of a proper apology.

When he left the last store on his route, he mused whether to eat out or buy something at the convenience store and have it at home. Not that he was very hungry.

He finally made up his mind to go to a cheap place and have a bowl of gyuudon, when his mobile vibrated in his pocket. He pulled it out and read the email, not very surprised to see that it was from Kirishima.

Come to our place today. Hiyo-chan wants to make tempura-udon, so we certainly will need your help.

That was his message. No greeting, no teasing, no 'I love you' to embarrass him. Just a plain invitation for dinner. So he was still angry - seemingly angry enough to consider discussing it with him. This was not going to be a pleasent evening.

Yokozawa sighed, slipped the mobile back into his pocket and went to the closest station. Whether he liked it or not, it was better to face his demons quickly before the whole thing got even worse.

It took several knocks to the familiar door of the Kirishimas and many seconds of anxiety before someone opened. Actually, Yokozawa had been prepared to meet Hiyori at the door, since she was the one greeting him cheerfully most of the times while her father stood in the background and watched them with a smile.

This time was different, and he was greeted with a small nod from his partner, who looked a hundred times better and more relaxed than some hours ago. Though, he didn't smile.

Yokozawa looked around but couldn't find any signs of the little girl. "Hiyo-chan isn't at home?"

"Don't worry, I didn't lie to you."

Yokozawa cringed a little at the accusation, for he felt caught thinking such things.

"She just went out with my mother to buy a new set of clothes for the cold season and ingredients for dinner. I think they'll be back in about two hours or so."

"I see..."

Kirishima snatched the bag from his hand and went inside. "Are you planning to stand there until she arrives? Come in and sit down. I'll fetch you a beer."

There was no reason to decline the offer, so he slipped out of his shoes and went to the living area, where he dropped off his coat and suit jacket and made his way to the sofa. The new edition of 'Japun' on the table caught his eye and he stopped mid-motion. The whole day he had been so caught up in his thoughts about what he had said that morning that he had completely forgotten about the issue at hand. Reluctantly, he reached for the magazine and flipped through it.

"One of my subordinates sent it to my via courier", Kirishima explained and set the beer can onto the coffee table. "They really have me by the balls this time. Never underestimate the wrath of Printing, huh."

Slowly, Yokozawa lowered his head and put back the magazine. "I'm sorry."

"Don't mind it. Tomorrow I'm going to roast Ijuuin-sensei and make him draw a color-double-page and a side chapter that will be added next month."

A hand was placed onto his shoulder from behind, but he still couldn't turn around. Given the case that Kirishima's face was as soft as his voice, he didn't deserve to look at him.

"That too, but... I mean the things that I said to you."

"Ah, about me having no dignity?"

He stiffened at those words. "I don't really know why I said such horrible things to you."

Fingers were squeezing his shoulder reassuringly. "I know why, Yokozawa." Those fingers trailed down his back and stopped on his left side, while another hand rested on its counterpart.

When Kirishima spoke the next time, Yokozawa was surprised by the sudden proximity of his voice. "You were irritated that a blockhead like me would give up or let himself be scolded. You were being protective, that's all. I have no reason to be angry with you."

He bit his lower lip. Although Kirishima said that it was okay, being forgiven and forgiving himself were two different pairs of shoes. "But..."

"Anyway, what I was thinking about all day was how you reprimanded Ijuuin-sensei and Yonehara. So forceful, so energetic..."

Now he was embracing him from behind, his breath tickling the back of Yokozawa's neck. But there was something else that caught the younger man's full attention.

"Could it be that... Are you hard?!"

"If you can't tell, why don't you have a look at it?"

Goosebumps started to show on his arms, but he still didn't dare to move. "Weren't you completely done in this morning?"

"True", he whispered in his ear. "But I had a shower, plenty of sleep and much time to think of you. If you feel so bad about what you said to me, why don't you make up for it?"

"Why do I suspect that you're not thinking about a treat for lunch, when you say that?"

Kirishima chuckled lightly and started to loosen his lover's tie and to pull his white shirt out of his pants. "Let me suck you off."

By taking a sudden step forward, Yokozawa was able to pry himself free. From the heat on his cheeks and ears he knew that he was blushing. Kirishima almost had him. Almost.

"I'm exhausted."

"Then what's the problem? You don't have to do much when you're being sucked off, right? Trust me, I'm experienced."

"With doing... favors?"

"No, with being sucked off."

"Okay, I'll come back in two hours", he said and tried to reach for his coat, when he was grabbed once again from behind and pulled back into his lover's arms.

"Don't be silly. You won't go anywere with that hard-on. They might call the police, and I just cannot share you with a guy in uniform."

"I... I don't have..."

"Liar", he said teasingly and reached between his legs in a quick move. "I don't need to see it to know when you're hard. Say..." Again he leaned forward, until his lips almost touched Yokozawa's ear. "You got aroused by the idea of me giving you a blowjob, didn't you?"

"It's because you're feeling me up, idiot", he grumbled, but already knew that - considering his flushed cheeks and the now very clearly visible goose bumps - he was losing this battle. Clumsily, he tried to push Kirishima's hand away. "Stop doing these things in the living room! This is family space!"

"Fine."

Without further warning, he was wrapped in Kirishima's arms and pushed to the bedroom like a victim. "Then I assume in another room it will be fine."

At least he wasn't touching his most delicate parts anymore, so Yokozawa decided to comply instead of taking the risk of being teased any further. It was always like this. His lover found a crack somewhere in his armor, and the moment Yokozawa's face turned red, it encouraged Kirishima to tease him even more. It was like an endless spiral downwards, until the younger man finally gave up. It was not that he didn't like the same things that his partner liked - it was just not like him to be that open without the slightest feeling of shame. In addition, he knew that, if he started to give his okay to such things from the start, there was no telling what ideas would pop up in the editor's mind in the future. Too dangerous.

As they reached the bed, Kirishima was quick to give him a push, so he landed on the mattress. The sudden encounter of the furniture and his body pressed the air out of his lungs, and for a moment he was so distracted by finding his breath again, that he was too slow to notice what was happening below his waistline.

A rustle made him pay attention again, and he craned his neck, just in time to see Kirishima throw aside his suit pants. For a second he entertained the thought of complaining about wrinkles in his suit, but all rationality was lost when he felt hands stroke his bare ass. When had he lost his underwear?

"Now, that's a nice ass", Kirishima commented and gave him a light spank.

"What are you doing?!" Yokozawa struggled to get up, but was held down by the same hands that had caressed him a minute ago.

"I'm enjoying the view, and then I'm going to have sex with you."

He knew that his face was turning red - again - and feeling something wet and warm moving on his butt cheeks did not make it any better. "Don't...", he begged and hated his own voice for sounding so ragged already.

"Then turn around and let me blow you. How can you lie on your belly in this condition anyway?"

Before he could even move to turn around by himself, those two hands, still holding him, started to twist his hip. The rest of his body followed almost naturally.

When Yokozawa looked up, he saw his lover sitting next to him on the bed, still completely dressed and staring down at his exposed lower half. With everything still covered except for his crotch, he felt like an exhibition piece. Daylight was shining through the windows and he had the urge to close the curtains, so the room would be darker.

"Stop staring, you pervert..."

"Right, I forgot the matter at hand. Literally."

His fingers wrapped around Yokozawa's cock and he gave him some lazy strokes, still watching his partner's body intensely. Although his touches felt good, admittedly, they seemed somewhat soft in comparison to the usual treatment. It looked like he was pondering on something.

"Kirishima-san...?"

Finally he looked up, his lips forming into an apologetic smile. "Sorry, today's really bad. Let's postpone the blowjob for now and..." He opened his own pants and took them off, to throw them into the same corner where Yokozawa's suit pants were already lying.

The very next moment Yokozawa felt his legs being parted. "He... hey! I cannot..."

"I know, Takafumi."

These soft words sent a shudder through his body, and he was at a loss at what he was supposed to do. Because he had no idea what was going on in his lover's mind. It confused him as much as it made him curious.

Kirishima was now between his legs, but his hips were positioned too high to suggest any intention of entering him already. Slowly he lowered his body and pressed his crotch against Yokozawa's, who gasped as their cocks made contact. Then Kirishima started moving against him, his expression a mixture of lust and... insecurity.

Truth be told, the dark-haired man really wanted this to continue. Of course, he'd rather bite his tongue off than saying so, but feeling the heat of the other body so intensely made him almost lose his mind. Still, something was strange today and he knew that he would regret it if he didn't ask. "What's wrong?"

Kirishima stopped, still breathing heavily, and looked down at him with glazed eyes. "I've been thinking about you the whole day..."

"You already said that."

Instead of answering him immediately, he leaned down and captured Yokozawa's lips in a kiss. It started as a rather chaste kiss, but only took seconds to become more passionate and forceful. Again he moved against him, this time in a much slower pace, as if he wanted to taste every inch of the bare skin with his own. When he finally let go of his lips again, he lowered his head a little more and started drawing a fine line with the tip of his tongue on Yokozawa's neck.

Yokozawa groaned as Kirishima's mouth made contact. He just couldn't help it. No matter how much he was able to restrain his voice to not let the neighbours hear him, when Kirishima was attacking his neck, he lost his senses. "...A-ahh..."

"I know." Again Kirishima lifted his head to look at him. "I really wanted to have sex with you."

"That's nothing new", he responded between heavy breaths, although he could not deny the warm feeling in his lower abdomen at the statement. Why was he so weak when it came to these kinds of situations? At this point he was already more than prepared to let him have him.

"It's such a turn-on when you're shouting at others in order to protect me." Kirishima gave him another, very soft, kiss. "Hold me."

Yokozawa felt his fingers go cold as he looked up into his face to search for anything. Some hint that this had been a joke, because obviously his partner would never say something like that in all honesty. But all he found were serious almond-colored eyes. "Why...?"

Long fingers combed through his hair, as he watched Kirishima rest his forehead against his own and close his eyes. "Because I want to feel you so fucking badly that I can't hold back anymore. Just do me."

For a long moment he hesitated, pondering, until he finally took hold of Kirishima's shoulders and pushed him off of him, quickly following by lifting his own body. "Undress", he demanded.

Surprised by the action as well as by his words, his partner looked up at him. "Okay...?"

"Don't be such an idiot", he grumbled and started unbuttoning his own shirt. "If we're going to do it, then I want to do it properly."

"So this is the special virgin-treatment?"

Yokozawa snorted and took over the task of undressing Kirishima completely, as the other man didn't move. "Don't act all innocent and sweet. Today is payday, so I'm going to watch you as much as I like."

Kirishima peeled his white shirt off his shoulders and wrapped his legs around his waist, obviously losing the last remains of patience. "God, you are so sexy just now."

If there were two things in this world which never had any connection in his opinion, then they were himself and sexiness. Yokozawa never considered himself to be especially handsome. His hands and face were always tanned because of his job that included walking outside a lot, and he was still too skinny, although the good dinner he had with the Kirishimas almost every day had helped him to gain a little weight recently. So right now he had no idea why his lover was giving him such a hungry look and pulling him closer with his legs, begging him silently to continue.

He moaned as their erect cocks came into contact once more. "What... are you doing?"

Kirishima wrapped his arms around his back, pulling him down. His voice was sounding even more dry and broken now. "When are you going to fuck me? Do you need a step-by-step tutorial?"

The salesman frowned at this ridiculous comment and pressed his hips down a little more to make those pale legs part wider. Maybe it was due to his desk job, but Kirishima's body was rather stiff.

"As if I'd enter you without any preparation! It'll be unpleasent enough as it is, and getting blood out of white sheets is a pain."

"Blood?!"

Yokozawa had to smirk a little at the reaction. At least now the other man would stop telling him to hurry up, so he would be able to genuinely enjoy this situation and to brace himself for the things that were yet to come. He reached out to the nightstand next to the right bedside, and retrieved lube and some condoms. Actually, he didn't like having those utensils in such an obvious location, but on the other hand, in times like this he couldn't imagine any better place. As he lifted the small bottle and covered the fingers of his right hand with the transparent liquid, he greatly enjoyed Kirishima's expression. Anticipating, yet cautious. And, maybe that was already the best moment of the day, he was blushing.

Although he was tempted to make a comment about it - just to have a small revenge -, he swallowed it down, because he understood that keeping up a certain tension was crucial to make this work and to make Kirishima feel good. In the end this was not only about having some kind of compensation for all the times their roles had been reversed, but it was also about them crossing yet another line of intimacy. He just couldn't afford to mess this up.

"Your hand is trembling, Takafumi."

"I had too much coffee today. And stop calling me that!", he said quickly to brush it off and cover his own insecurity. In truth, he was not that experienced in taking the lead, but there was no way he would ever tell him that.

He reached down between Kirishima's legs, where he softly pressed against his entrance until he managed to slip his middle finger inside. Immediately the muscles around it tensed up, which was an understandable reaction by someone who was about to be the bottom for the first time.

"Relax a bit", he whispered and gave him a comforting kiss. He already started to feel bad for his clumsy approach but now there was no return, and all he could do was to act confident, even if he didn't feel like it at all. "Don't be so nervous, I have no intention to hurt you."

"I'm not nervous."

He had to smile and kissed him again, this time a little longer and deeper. "You denying it is quite adorable."

"Must be like looking into a mirror."

Instead of giving him a reply, he pushed his finger in deeper, which was answered with a low moan.

"How's this?"

"Better...", the editor mumbled and instinctly moved against his hand in search for more contact.

"Better than what?"

"Better than doing it by myself."

'I should've known that he'd say something like that', Yokozawa thought with a frown and decided for less talking.

When he pulled out to add another finger, Kirishima below him was not only getting visibly relaxed, but he also started shivering with excitement. Brown strands of hair were covering parts of his face, already sticky with sweat, and his cheeks were graced by a thin layer of crimson.

The black-haired man found it gradually becoming harder to keep his composure and not to make a bold move and just have him right now. Usually he wasn't the proactive type, but this new experience had caught him off-guard and now he found himself thinking about things that almost made him feel ashamed of himself.

This was torture, for both of them. Despite having done nothing more than kissing and rubbing against each other, he saw a drop of his own precum land on his partner's upper leg, and the situation on the receiving end didn't seem to be any better.

This time quite impatiently, he prepared him with two fingers now, stretching and stroking his inside until he found that he couldn't bear the passionate sounds of Kirishima any longer.

"I'm going in now", Yokozawa announced and reached out for the condoms, but his arm was stopped by long fingers holding his wrist.

"It's fine..."

"Like hell it is!", he hissed in embarrassment. "You really have no idea what you're saying."

The answer was a slightly sour face. "Yokozawa, I'm about to be fucked by you, so I might as well enjoy the premium package. Just do it, because I might cum any moment."

In absolutely no mood to start bickering now, he complied with the request, not without grumbling a little. As usual, there was no use in arguing with the other man about things that he was determined to do. Maybe in the end, the one in control was Kirishima - as always.

Yokozawa covered his cock with more lube for good measure, positioned himself and shoved one hand under Kirishima's back to support him, while he used the other to direct himself to the entrance, slowly pushing in. When the tip was in, he paused a moment to give his partner time to adjust to the new feeling. Undoubtedly, this was very different from one or two fingers. The intense trembling of the other body was proof enough.

"... ugh..."

He was wondering if he should inform him, that he wasn't in even halfway yet, but decided to kiss him passionately instead. Anything was welcome to distract Kirishima from any pain he might be feeling. Carefully he went in deeper, little by little, silently enjoying the warmth enclosing him.

While he eased in completely, Kirishima was holding onto his shoulders, clinging to him like a man would cling to a lifeboat for dear life. His chest was rising and sinking in a fast rhythm.

"Are you alright?"

He turned his head to the right and looked up at him from the corners of his eyes, his breath still erratic. "You feel amazing... just give me two seconds..."

Yokozawa dipped his head down to kiss his neck and jawline. "Zen..."

A silent gasp. "Move."

Yokozawa's hand wandered down to his hip and took hold of it firmly, before he pulled out a few centimetres and pushed back in, which was rewarded with another moan. As he repeated his actions, he couldn't hold his own voice any longer. The feeling of his lover holding onto him, pressing against him to get as much contact of skin as possible, cheeks and parts of his neck flushed in arousal, and moaning in passion, was just too overwhelming.

He really couldn't hold back anymore.

His movements became faster, as he pulled out almost completely and thrust back in as deep as possible.

"Faster, harder!", Kirishima begged under heavy breathing, unable to form even one coherent sentence anymore.

Gathering the last bits of energy, his lover granted him his wish, thrusting frantically under laboured groans. When he hit a very sensitive spot, Kirishima bent his back. "Oh god!"

With every intention of making this unforgettable - or rather, to make sure that he would not be able forget this - Yokozawa spread his partner's legs further with boths hands, lifted his own upper body, and went in as deep as possible. Over and over he kept aiming for the same spot again, pleased with the sweet groans he received in return. When he felt a familiar warm sensation build in his lower belly, he reached down and gripped Kirishima's cock, which was already slick with precum. It took only a few strokes before a small cry emanated from Kirishima's throat, and he spread his cum across their stomachs and the hand still pumping him.

Yokozawa felt his muscles tighten around him, and with two final thrusts he came into this beautiful body before collapsing on it.

It took a few minutes for them to catch their breath and regain their senses.

"Give me the tissue box", Yokozawa mumbled against his neck, unable to look into his face directly. His whole body was feeling hot, so the cool air of the room was more than welcome to chill his sweat-covered skin a little. Now that his brain started working again, he couldn't help but feel embarrassed for the way he had lost control. To switch to autopilot that easily was almost frightening him, and he wasn't sure if he wanted it to happen again.

"Why?"

"I know that you don't care, but it's always a hassle to wash the dirty covers without Hiyori seeing it. It'll be a mess if I pull it out like this now."

"Then stay like this for another one or two minutes."

He wanted to refuse, but two slender arms embraced him, fingers traced the line of his spine lovingly, and he was feeling unable to say anything at all.

"I love you so much, Takafumi."

"... hm..."

"Just because I can't see your face, it doesn't mean that I don't know that you're blushing", he said and chuckled, hugging him closer.

Yokozawa closed his eyes and allowed himself to enjoy the display of affection. No matter how often he was touched by this man, it was never enough. Deep inside of him there was always a part that was longing for more. "I was wondering... why, all of a sudden, you wanted to do... this."

"Because I trust you."

"Just proves that you're an idiot..."

"There's also one other thing." With an elegant motion, he turned both of them, so they could lie next to each other. "It's too late for the tissues now, huh?"

Sighing, Yokozawa looked at his face with furrowed eyebrows. "This weekend you'll be responsible for the laundry."

"I guess I deserve it."

"So, what's the other reason?"

Kirishima lifted a hand and started petting his raven hair affectionately while looking into his face with a warm smile. "I know that there isn't much that I can give only to you. My first kiss was taken many years ago, I was married, I have a daughter, the guest room you're sleeping in has been used, as well as the chair you're sitting on, or the cup you're drinking from. But this - me being held by someone for the first time - is what I could give to you. It's something just between the two of us, and I'll make sure to give all my seconds and thirds and fourths and all the other times that will follow only to you."

His heart was furiously beating against his chest and he quickly turned over to the other side in order to hide his burning face. "You could've just bought me a new cup."

"It's lame to propose with a cup."

"Who the hell proposes with his ass instead?!", he retorted, but suddenly fell silent as the words finally sank in. "Pro... what?"

"Move in with us."

"We already talked about this."

"Did we? I only recall you making a bunch of boring excuses", he said and sat up. "If I could marry you, I'd do it without hesitating. Even if I can't, I'm determined to have you by my side."

Yokozawa could hear Kirishima inhale, and waited for him to continue, but there was only silence. What was he supposed to reply? After these two days in hell, the hard blow from Printing and the things he had said to his partner, being proposed to just wasn't logical. There was no way that he could take this seriously; Kirishima must have been exhausted and still on a high after their sexual intercourse. Also before he had asked on several occasions, but never all too seriously - "Why don't you move in?", "I wish you could cook breakfast for me everyday", "Sex would be much easier if we shared the same bed every night". So the only explanation which made any sense to him now, was that Kirishima had taken his teasings to a new level, carrying the joke a little too far for his liking.

When he spoke again, Kirishima's voice suddenly changed, sounding somewhat cheerful but not natural. "I feel like an entertainer making a very bad joke and no one's laughing. Guess a hurting ass really messes up your mind, huh?"

There was a rustling of the sheets as he got up, not without ruffling Yokozawa's hair. "It's just as you said: Nobody proposes after sex."

The sound of receding footsteps was followed by the click of the bathroom door's closing.

Yokozawa buried his face in the pillow and crossed his arms over his head.

"Shit."

Next time: The best kind of love