A/N: I don't get much ideas because no one is reviewing but two nice otaku… Please tell me who to do next in comments? T-T
Yamato watched in panic as the berserk Naruto rampaged. Orochimaru was still indestructible, respawning in that disgusting way.
Who gets reborn by crawling out of their own mouth, dripping with saliva, anyway?
Only one way to surely stop the kid, he thought, forming the hand seals as he did so. Sweat was beading on his brow.
Kuro, Shiro, Akuma, Tenshi, Gure.
"Watashi wa gure o shokan!"
And out of nowhere landed a…
Is that a woman, or a very girly man, or a crossdresser, or a bi…
The wood jutsu user halted in his pondering as said woman-man stood up. It whipped it's head and glared at Yamato.
"Fish-eyes, were you the one who got me here!? Just when I was in the middle of a spar with Moyashi, too!" The man-woman demanded in a rather masculine voice. Trying to ignore the enraged screeches of Tailed Naruto swatting at Orochimaru, Yamato decided that it was a man. But, just to make sure:
"Ah - yes. I summoned you here, and humbly beg you for help in stopping my, uh, subordinate" - he gestured towards Naruto - "and the asexual snake man fighting him. And… Are you a womanly man or a manly woman? No offense."
The long-haired samurai took the first few sentences in with barely concealed rage, his hand gripping the hilt of the sword by his side. But when Yamato popped the question, he exploded.
"Like HELL I WILL HELP YOU, BASTARD FISH-EYES! AND IF YOU EVER HAPPEN TO BE ASKED, TELL 'EM THAT I, YUU KANDA, AM A MAN, GODDAMNIT!"
The last thing Yamato saw was the man (well, at least now he knew for sure) unsheathing his sword and whapping him with the flat of it. On the head. Really, really hard.
Who says that Innocence can't hurt humans?
"Yamato-san!" Sakura squeaked, catching sight of him falling to the ground with foam bubbling out of his mouth.
Even the enraged Naruto turned around to stare at the unconscious ninja writhing in pain.
Kanda vanished.
*smile* "Oh, Kanda! Where were you? Did you run away from our fight?"
*twitch* "Shut UP, MOYASHI!"
*plick* "What did you just say, BaKanda?"
*jerk* "I'll cut off your Jiji hair and burn it with incense! En Garde!"
*convulse* "Oh, BaKanda, we both know that you only vanished because you were too cowardly to fight like a true man."
And so on.