How to Manage Your Vassals

Nathaniel

He waited in his cell for his jailers to hang him. Then he waited for the darkspawn to kill him. Then he was forgotten and he waited to die of thirst. Then his jailers remembered him again and he was back to waiting to be hung. The sound of footsteps made him wonder if it was finally his death coming. He leaned against a wall and scowled at the woman who opened the door.

The woman stopped suddenly as if stunned for a moment. She quickly regained her composure and came forward.

"Well, Elissa Cousland..." Nathaniel raked her with his eyes. She was older, of course, he hadn't seen her in a few years, but she was different too. Her bearing was different. She wasn't as haughty as he remembered her. Her face seemed softer, friendlier. "Somehow I was expecting my father's murderer to be more impressive."

"You're his son?" she asked. "I think I saw you in Denerim. Were you there for the festivities?" She tilted her head and looked at him closely. "Man, you sure have his beak... er, nose."

Nathaniel laughed bitterly. "Don't play with me, Lissy. You know who I am. My father was forever trying to get us married. Surely you haven't forgotten that. Fortunately he gave up that idea and sent me to the Free Marches instead. At least the women there have breasts."

She looked down at her chest and threw back her shoulders. Her breasts did look larger than he remembered. "You'd be amazed at the things I've forgotten... uh, like your name."

He launched himself from the back wall and gripped the bars furiously in his hands. "Na-than-iel," he said it slowly as if trying to teach an idiot to say it. "Stop playing with me. If you've come down here to gloat then..."

Elissa sighed and sagged visibly. "I'm not here to gloat, Nathaniel. I'm here to check out the prisoner, which is you, I guess. They said it took four Grey Wardens to take you down. What exactly were you doing here?"

"I thought you'd be here, with the Grey Wardens. I was going to try to kill you... lay a trap for you, but you weren't here. I heard them say you were staying in Denerim. So then I just decided to get some of my family's things. It's all I have left."

Elissa looked at him with something like pity, or understanding. It infuriated him. "Look, whatever happened to the Couslands was horrible, but it was war. It shouldn't have impacted my entire family. The Howes are pariahs now. "

"I agree, sort of," she said. "Although I suppose stripping a noble family of their lands and their... stuff... is an effective way to keep the nobility in line. Shame your father didn't fully consider the consequences of losing. Although perhaps he thought the risk was worth it."

Nathaniel snarled at her. "You talk as if... How can you be so dispassionate about it all?"

"Well... it's a long story. Perhaps I'll tell you one day, but..."

"Oh get on with it. You destroyed my family and now you get to decide my fate." He laughed bitterly. "Ironic, isn't it?"

She looked at him appraisingly, crossing her arms. "What will you do if I let you go?"

"If you let me go?" He laughed and looked at her disbelievingly. She's playing with me. " I might come back again. You might not catch me next time." I won't be toyed with.

"I think I've decided." She smiled at him sadly and turned to leave him.

"Cousland bitch!" He called out after her.

"Not so much these days." He heard her voice floating down the stairwell back to him as she left.

Loghain

He wanted to stay longer. Lucy clearly needed his help while she was recovering from child birth and the keep was a mess from the darkspawn attacks, but his daughter was due any day now. If there was ever a man torn between his desires and his duty, it was him.

He held "his" son, Daniel, and walked around her room bouncing him gently. "Who's da-da's good boy?" He gently pushed the tiny button of his nose with his big finger. "You are! Yes, you are!" He was rewarded by either a smile or a grimace, or perhaps it was just the baby passing a little gas.

Lucy was grinning. "I rather enjoy seeing this side of you, Loghain. You must have been a wonderful father to Anora."

He snorted softly, not wishing to alarm his son with his cynicism. "I was a terrible father to Anora. I was rarely around since I spent so much time in Denerim with Maric. When I did see her I was always mindful she would be the queen one day so my standards for her were high. Too high really. She didn't have much of a childhood." He smoothed down the ruffled black hair on Daniel's head. "But this little one, he's free to become whatever he wants to be."

Lucy nodded. "Of course. Growing up without a title isn't such a bad thing is it?"

Loghain shook his head. "Not bad at all. Other than the Orlesians, I had a happy childhood."

He handed the baby back to Lucy and she pulled away the neck of her dress to feed him. "Lucy, I have to go back to Denerim and be there for Anora."

Lucy sighed contentedly and settled back into her chair. "I know. She's going to need you there. We'll get by. The seneschal, Varel, seems pretty competent."

He frowned. "I don't want to go. Look, I'll be back as soon as I can. I also told Varel to find you a wet-nurse."

Lucy was startled out of her relaxed pose. "What? I intend to breastfeed this baby myself!"

Loghain sat next to her and took her hand. "That's not realistic, Lucy, you're going to be too busy. You've got far too much on your plate to tackle that too."

"I don't suppose you have breast pumps here?"

Loghain shrugged. "Never heard of them, but I wouldn't be an expert."

Lucy's face fell and tears began to well up in her eyes. "I thought I'd get a chance to be a mom and do the whole..." she sniffed noisily, "... the whole mom thing! I was going to breastfeed for at least a year."

Loghain put an arm around her and the baby and pulled them close. "I know. I know. Look, why don't I write to Weisshaupt and tell them..."

"No!" Lucy looked alarmed. "I don't want them to know about the baby. I don't want them interfering again. I don't trust them. Better to deal with this on my own than having them involved in any way."

He caressed her cheek with his thumb and wiped away a trail of tears. She sighed and looked up at him with her dark brown eyes. She looked so fragile and vulnerable, so unlike when he had first met her. Then she was all sharp angles, tough as a whip, always fast with a comeback. Her pregnancy had softened her, made her susceptible. She said it was "whore moans", just another one of those things she had said that made no sense to him. He'd gotten good at steering clear of asking about such things, they usually led to a long pointless discourse that made no damn sense to him. Well, whatever the cause of the softness and vulnerability he had an overwhelming desire to protect her and the baby. It ripped him in two to have to leave her to go to Denerim. He leaned in and kissed her gently, lingering with his lips just touching hers.

She sighed softly then pulled back just enough to barely disengage their lips. "Don't do this, Loghain. I can't change how I feel about Zevran."

"He's not here. I am." He pulled Elissa back to him and she leaned against his shoulder.

She stiffened and pulled away. "That's not fair, Loghain." Her expression clouded; she looked angry.

"You never did tell me why he left."

She sighed. "The Crows came for another visit a couple months back... they captured me to try to get to him. Apparently no one leaves the Crows, at least not alive. He went back to Antiva to 'resolve' things."

Loghain opened his mouth, ready to tell her there was no way the elf was going to survive that, but he thought better of it. She was so emotional right now. She really did love that elf, or so she said. Telling her that he was almost certainly dead seemed a little self-serving not to mention insensitive. "Maker... do you really think it's wise to be mixed up with this Crow? You have a little one to think about now."

"That's why he went to Antiva. He'll either take over the cell or die trying. Either way, problem solved." Her face crumpled again and she drew a deep breath, obviously fighting back the tears.

Loghain pulled her back to his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Lucy. If there's anything I can do..."

"Just one thing, if you..."

"Anything, Lucy, name it."

"Stay with me tonight? I just... I don't want to be alone."

"Of course."

Nothing could have been easier than to slip into bed with her and hold her closely as she fell asleep. It reminded him of so many other times they'd done this, except without the passion. This felt right.

Daniel slept in a cradle next to the bed. He woke up several times to nurse and Loghain got up and handed the baby to Lucy. He sat up with them and watched her half-drowsing, the baby sucking sleepily at her nipple. He wished he didn't have to go.

When dawn came he kissed her gently and got out of bed carefully so as not to wake her. He stooped down to kiss his son goodbye and gazed at him a few moments, trying to imprint his image on his mind. It might be awhile before he saw his boy again.

Anders

"How're you feeling, Commander?" He laid a hand on her mid-section and felt for anything unusual and found nothing.

"Good! You did a great job healing. Even my belly has shrunk up already."

Anders preened at the compliment. "There are a lot of things that get a bit... well, stretched and abused when you have a baby. I put them all back to their original condition."

Lucy smiled. "Damn! I doubt Wynne could have done better."

"Wynne? You know that old girl?" Anders looked at her curiously.

"Well sure, she was with us through the whole Blight nearly. Surely you heard that."

Anders shook his head. "I was spending quite a lot of time as a guest in the dungeon under the Tower. I pretty much missed hearing about the Blight entirely, except at the very end, just before my last escape attempt." He laughed and shook his head. "So, what was it like traveling around with Wynne for a year? I bet you heard quite a few lectures."

I snorted. "You don't know the half of it. She disapproved of me mightily at times. Eh, we got along pretty well despite everything. We have a thing or two in common."

"Such as?"

"Our ages aren't that far apart, although I'm far more hip than she is."

He squinted at her. "You still haven't explained..."

"I'm not going to until you've undergone the Joining. Once you're one of us... I'll feel better about telling you my secrets."

"One of you? Just what does this joining involve?"

She cackled and rubbed her hands together. "You become part of the giant hive-mind the Wardens all share. Then our secrets will become yours and you'll never divulge them no matter what."

Anders rubbed at his chin a moment. "You're having one on me, aren't you?"

"Can you see me being part of a hive-mind? They'd kick me out once they saw the sort of thoughts that race around in my mind. Either that or I'd drag the rest of the hive-mind into the gutter where I habitually reside."

He laughed. "Okay, so now I know what it isn't. What is it?"

"It's a secret. However, we need to make this stuff and I need your help." She pulled out a piece of parchment. "Here! I got this improved Joining potion formula from an old mage in a creepy old Grey Warden tower. I can't read it though... it's in some weird language." She handed the page to Anders.

He read it. "Arcanum. We write lots of stuff in Arcanum, mostly because the only people who can read it, usually, are other mages." His eyes scanned the page. "Archdemon blood?"

"Got a keg of it from the... you know, archdemon."

He nodded and went on reading it. "Darkspawn blood?"

She nodded. "Check."

"Lyrium...some herbs, cinnamon, sugar..."

"Cinnamon and sugar? Huh! What for?" she asked.

"It says to make it taste better. We also need Grey Warden blood."

"Really?"

He pointed at the paper, "Krv správcu. Blood of the Warden. Wait... this involves blood magic." His doubt was beginning to grow.

"Was your first clue all the blood? Sometimes we have to do that sort of thing. When it comes to darkspawn and blights and such, the Grey Wardens rarely hesitate to use any tool at their disposal."

"I don't do blood magic," he said stubbornly. "You can never get it out of your clothes. Besides, the Chantry has reason enough to hate me."

"I'll do it. Just tell me what I have to do."

They went over the ritual and Lucy took copious notes and assembled all the ingredients.

Anders caught her just before she went to slice open her hand and bleed into the mixture and recite the incantation. "Don't do it."

She sighed. "Anders look, I'm not entirely unfamiliar with blood magic. I've talked to some blood mages, they don't instantly turn into abominations. I think it's just people grasping after power who do. Maybe there's something about being tain... a Grey Warden that keeps it from happening. Just trust me."

"No, it says here that this part of the ritual needs to be done right before the potion is drunk." He shuddered. "Ew! We have to drink this?"

"Oh! I see." She nodded sympathetically. "Yeah... sorry, you do drink it. It is pretty awful but you'll be able to sense darkspawn and... some other things."

Anders felt distinctly queasy at the thought. "All right. I guess if it gets me away from the Circle once and for all..."

She nodded. "It will. Once you're a Grey Warden, the Chantry can't touch you. Even the king and queen will back us up on that." She hesitated for a moment. "Okay, go down to the great hall. Tell Varel to assemble the others and we can do it then."

Anders nodded and started for the door.

She reached out and grasped his arm for a moment. He turned and looked at her, her eyes contained something he couldn't quite read but he thought they looked a little sad.

"I just want to say thank you for everything you've done for me... the baby... helping us."

Anders nodded and left feeling a little unsettled at her expression. Ah well, whatever it is it has to be better than being hung at the Tower.

Lucy

I gazed at the chalice filled with red-black blood, smelling faintly of cinnamon, and wondered who I would be killing this day. Alistair said everyone but me died at my... Elissa's Joining. I guess, in a manner of speaking, that moment had eventually killed Elissa too. I hoped Avernus was right about this formula; that it would result in fewer deaths. I wanted to steel myself to it, but my emotions were so close to the surface.

Stupid hormones! I'd wept for an hour after I got up and saw Loghain was gone. Then I'd fed the baby and he had made such a cute expression that it made my heart ache and I cried again. Then I thought of Zevran and wondered if I'd ever see him again and that set me off for the third time. I could tell Loghain was biting his tongue last night. I was certain he thought Zevran was dead. I almost believed it myself, why else wouldn't he have at least written to me?

Stop it! I slapped myself. "Ow." I walked over to the mirror in my bedroom and snarled at myself. "Stop this pathetic weeping, woman!" I growled. I drew my eyebrows up and looked at myself with a cowed expression. "Okay," I said, meekly. I switched back to mean-Lucy. "Get yourself together, Lucy! No one is going to take you seriously if you burst into tears every five minutes." Meek-Lucy nodded. "I... I'll do it!" Mean-Lucy nodded curtly. "See you do!"

I turned and walked resolutely from my room to the great hall. The recruits were all assembled.

Varel approached me. "May I have a moment, Commander?"

"Of course." He guided me to a private corner of the hall.

"Do you think it's wise to recruit the Howe? I understand he has some... enmity towards you."

"It's a risk, but I don't believe in punishing the children for the crimes of their parents. This gives him a way to, in some measure, redeem his family name." I hoped I wasn't just being overly optimistic; I had that tendency. He did say he had planned to kill me, but then when it came down to it, he didn't. Of course, I wasn't there to be killed...

Varel nodded. "As you wish. Would you like me to do the ceremony? The Grey Wardens who were here before you taught me the words."

Was it completely craven of me to nod? Even if I didn't hand them the chalice, their deaths would be on my hands. I nodded to Varel.

Varel spoke with gravitas. He gave the words a lot more dignity than I think I could have.

"Since the first, these words have been spoken at the ceremony: Join us, brothers and sisters. Join us in the shadows where we stand vigilant. Join us as we carry the duty that cannot be forsworn. And should you perish, know that your sacrifice will not be forgotten. And that one day we shall join you."

I had to perform my little ritual now. I sliced across my hand with a very sharp knife and suppressed a shriek of pain. I let my blood flow into the goblet they would be drinking from. "Môže byť silne krv ochrániť." It was the Arcanum incantation that Anders had coached me in. It was something like, "Let the strength of my blood protect you." The blood dripping from my hand shimmered magically as it dripped into the cup.

After I counted at least ten fat drops of blood, I handed the cup to Varel and nodded to him. Varel looked at me suspiciously. He probably hadn't seen anything like this with the other Grey Wardens. I saw Anders watching me closely too, probably wondering if I was going to break out in abomination.

Varel gave the chalice to Oghren first. "Oghren, from this day forth you are a Grey Warden."

Oghren growled as he took the chalice, that was nearly as big as his head. "What's this? The sampler size? Are you making a crack about my height?"

I suppressed a laugh. "It's the same as everyone gets."

"Really? Huh!" He lifted it to his lips and began to drink heartily.

"Easy, buddy! You only need a sip," I cautioned him. I stood beside him and watched him carefully, ready to catch him if he fainted.

He stopped drinking and handed the cup to Varel. His eyes filmed over and he belched. "Not bad, really." He staggered unsteadily for a moment but then seemed fine.

Varel turned to me with a sigh. "Maker help us all."

"Amen, brother," I murmured.

Anders got the goblet next. "From this moment forth, Anders, you are a Grey Warden."

He looked at the contents of the chalice with disgust. "Even having helped prepare this doesn't seem to help. So I just drink this and... that's it?"

Varel nodded solemnly. "Yes, that is it."

Anders peered at it a moment longer and I prayed he wouldn't back out on me. "Well fine. But if I wake up chained in the hold of a slaver ship in nothing but my smallclothes, I'm blaming you, Commander Lucy."

I snorted. "I wouldn't do that. I'm sure someone around here could use those smallclothes."

"That's reassuring." He lifted the chalice to his lips and took a tentative swallow. He handed it to Varel and I stood beside him. When he began to teeter I stepped behind him and lowered him gently to the ground.

Varel stepped over to him and checked for a pulse. "He lives, Commander, and will awaken with time."

I sent my healing magic into him and looked around. His body was stressed, fighting as if against an infection. I decided not to interfere and left him lying there while we moved onto Mhairi.

Varel handed her the goblet and she looked at it reverently. "I've been waiting for this moment," she murmured, bringing the chalice to her lips and sipping the foul, cinnamon-scented mixture. Varel took the goblet from her. She began to choke and wheeze. I put my hands on her and sent healing magic into her. It was as if her immune system were being overwhelmed. I could feel her lungs filling with fluid and her heart beating irregularly, her body was being flooded with toxins and her internal organs were shutting down. There was nothing I could do but watch her die. I caught her as she fell and laid her down gently.

"I am sorry, Mhairi," I whispered over her as she took her last breath. Varel and I exchanged a glance and I could see the sorrow on his face too. I felt the tears burning behind my eyes again. I collected myself and then reached out and closed her eyelids. "May your Maker be with you."

Nathaniel watched us, horror crossing his features. "So this may be my execution after all." He laughed bitterly. "And you would have me think you merciful, Elissa?"

"Come on, Howe, I drank this. Don't tell me you're afraid?" I thought a little white... grey lie might buck up his courage. Perhaps I could sting his pride into doing it.

He held out his hand for the goblet and took it. "The moment of truth," he murmured and took a sip. I stood next to him as he started to waver and Varel snatched the goblet before he could drop it. "Don't touch me," he slurred as his eyes filmed over.

I ignored him and caught him as he fainted, laying him on the ground gently as I had the others.

"Is there a room we can take them too?" I asked Varel.

"Certainly, I'll have them moved." He looked at me appraisingly, perhaps noting my red eyes. "I'll have Mhairi taken care of too."

"Do we... notify someone? Next of kin?" I couldn't imagine how Wardens dealt with new recruits who didn't survive.

"We don't disclose the nature of the Joining and how dangerous it can be, Commander. If anyone comes to inquire of her, we'll tell them she perished in battle with darkspawn."

I nodded my head. "I see." I had been hoping the new formula would be less toxic, and perhaps it was. It sounded like the odds were usually pretty bad and I had a seventy-five percent survival rate so far.

"Commander, I can handle this. There are matters we should discuss later, but for now perhaps you should rest?" He looked concerned.

It was three days since I'd given birth and I was up and about. I felt fine, although I was a little tired and I figured the baby could use feeding.

"I'll send the wet-nurse up when she arrives," he said.

I couldn't help but frown. "All right."

I went upstairs to my room, the big one that had been Arl Howe's, sulking. If the bloody Orlesians hadn't gotten themselves killed and the stupid darkspawn hadn't attacked and the acting-Commander hadn't died and if the goddamned Crows hadn't attacked, I wouldn't need a damn wet-nurse for my baby! The whole idea of someone else nursing my kid creeped me out, although I had to admit someone else's breast was better than no breastfeeding at all.

Nathaniel

He awoke with a pounding headache and the memory of dreams of horrifying creatures. Darkspawn, he assumed. He looked around and saw he was in a small room, one off the great hall where the major domo used to live. The drapes were pulled and it was late afternoon. The room was fairly dark. He sat up clutching at his head and groaned.

"Ah, you're awake. Good." Elissa stood up from the chair in the corner.

Her voice startled him. He hadn't seen her there. "What are you doing here? Your poison didn't work, I'm still alive. Did you come here to finish me off?"

She walked over to the bed and stood with her arms crossed. "Nate, haven't you figured out I'm not going to kill you?"

"You don't get to call me Nate," he hissed at her.

She sighed. "Nathaniel. Sorry."

"So what do you want?"

"In general, or right now?" she asked.

"Both."

"I wanted to tell you about the Grey Wardens and about the Joining. It's all a big secret because, as you saw, it is sometimes fatal. However, I got my hands on a formula for an improved potion and that's what you and the others drank. It is supposed to be less... deadly and it removes some of the negatives."

"Like what?" he asked.

"Well, usually Grey Wardens only live thirty years, give or take some, from their Joining. This is supposed to remove that problem. I've actually seen some older Wardens look rather rejuvenated when they took it."

"So what does that mean, the Grey Wardens get to own me for more than thirty years now?" he asked, bitterly.

She shook her head. "Wow, you're just determined to see a black cloud around every silver lining, aren't you? Maybe it's just me but I think not having to go into the Deep Roads to die fighting darkspawn in thirty years is an improvement."

"An improvement over what? You were a teyrn's daughter. I was an arl's son. How have our lots been improved by becoming Wardens?"

She stared and blinked at him, stunned to silence for a moment. "I... it wasn't a choice for me either, Nathaniel. I was forced to join when... your father killed... my parents." She sighed as though fighting through something. "I can't do this. You need to know the truth."

He scoffed and folded his arms looking disbelievingly at her. "That will be refreshing."

She walked to a chair and sat down. "I'm not Elissa Cousland. I'm Lucy Woodridge and I'm from somewhere very, very far away. A mage named Flemeth exchanged our minds. It's a long story..."

Nathaniel's lips began to turn up as she started her story and they were curling further with every sentence. "Maker, you're actually insane! Oh this is priceless. The Hero of Ferelden is a mad woman. Completely crazy."

She grimaced and bit her lip. "Look, Anders knows... well, not the details yet, but he could tell that I'm not from this world. Loghain knows, the king and queen know..."

"That you're insane? That I can believe." His mood had improved considerably. This was rich with satire. The Cousland bitch who killed his father had gone mad, his day was made.

She held out her hand and a flame burst into the center of it, filling the dark room with light. "Elissa couldn't do that, could she? I'm a mage, she wasn't."

Nathaniel scrambled back away from her. "Maybe... I don't know. Perhaps she...you hid it all these years."

"Okay, I can't force you to believe me, but you'll hear me out all the same." She flicked her hand and the flame disappeared. "I woke up in Elissa's body moments after she drank the potion... not the one you got, the other one that's a lot more brutal. The Grey Wardens didn't know what to make of me at first but eventually they decided I needed to pretend to be Elissa. They filled me in on her background, what they knew of it. I discovered my magical abilities and... the Blight happened. We killed the archdemon and here I am."

"And you killed my father. Whether you're Lucy or Elissa, you're the one who killed him."

Lucy nodded. "I did. It was what Elissa would have done. I didn't enjoy it. Your father would have been hung or beheaded, I gave him the opportunity to die as a warrior."

Nathaniel sneered. "What gave you the right to be my father's executioner?"

"I wish I had a better answer for you, but it was a necessity."

"A necessity," he repeated hollowly.

"I had a part to play as Elissa Cousland. She would have sought revenge for the murders of her family and everyone at the Castle."

"And yet you spared me. She wouldn't have done that. Have you given up on playing your part?"

She shrugged. "It's difficult to pull off around people I spend a lot of time with, or who knew Elissa. I don't particularly like playing this role. I'm not even certain I would have liked her had I known her. I read her diary..."

Nathaniel barked out a short, sharp laugh. "Oh, that's rich. You wouldn't have liked yourself. Maker, you are nuts."

She glared at him. "Enough. I need to tell you what to expect as a Grey Warden. The old formula left Grey Wardens' infertile, the new one doesn't affect that."

Nathaniel laughed again. "Yes, I heard about your little bastard. I can only imagine what Fergus is going to do once he hears about that."

He didn't see her move, but she was suddenly on top of him, almost crushing his windpipe with her arm. His eyes went wide with surprise. How can anyone move that fast?

"Don't you ever speak about my son like that again!" Her face was a feral mask of rage.

"All right," he choked out the words. She composed her face again and went back to her chair.

Perhaps her story isn't entirely fiction. Elissa was always a good fighter but this... this was not natural. "You'd better get used to it, Eliss... Lucy. You're failing to act like Elissa and that will get people talking. She would have hidden this child, or gotten married, or at the very least gotten the father to acknowledge it." He rubbed at his neck where she had squeezed. He felt like living dangerously. "So, who is the father?"

"None of your business, Howe. This conversation is over." She abruptly stood up and left the room.

Nathaniel leaned back against the headboard of the bed and mused over that utterly bizarre conversation. Elissa wasn't herself, that was for sure. Whether it was because she was insane, or because her story was true, he wasn't entirely certain. What he was certain of was that it was time to make a decision. He hadn't made many decisions of his own in his life and any time he had it had gotten him into trouble with his father.

What to do? He thought about killing her, completing the cycle that his father had started. He was beginning to think that might be harder than he had expected, but no one is vigilant all the time. She had to sleep, or turn her back on him and let her guard down. No, she was killable, if he would but bide awhile.

She didn't kill me. The thought still puzzled him. Elissa would have, he was certain. Fergus might still try. He laughed again. What does Fergus think of his sister? The Couslands would have had a fit over a Cousland bastard. It never would have happened if Bryce and Eleanor had been alive. Fergus would be livid. The bastard could potentially end up inheriting the teyrnir unless Fergus provided another heir. Then there was the matter of her sparing his life and allowing him to join the Wardens. Nathaniel could only imagine how furious that would make Fergus.

No. He wouldn't kill her, he decided. That would take all the fun out of watching this calamity play out.

Anders

He sat in stunned silence as Lucy, Commander Lucy, explained her origins to him. When she finished she sat with her hands clasped in her lap and waited for a reaction. He reached out and grasped her wrist and touched that foreign part of her and knew that, however unbelievable, she was telling the truth; she wasn't of this world. When he touched "normal" people with his magic they felt... normal. She just felt different. It wasn't an unpleasant feeling, just unusual. It was a bit like taking a drink of water and finding out it's wine instead.

"And you never used magic until you came here, less than two years ago?" he asked her.

She shook her head. "No, magic doesn't work on my world." She laughed when she said it. "Oh, some people think it does but... no, it really doesn't."

"You... I could feel your magic from a long ways off that night I first met you. I never saw such displays of power from a single mage." Intellectually it should be an alarming thought. No one should have that sort of power – no one he ever heard of did – but she was such a charming, pretty girl with a wicked sense of humor. Those two facts couldn't occupy his brain at the same time.

She shrugged. "It was pregnancy hormones, I think. Those odd power surges are gone now. I have to admit they came in rather handy for killing all those darkspawn."

He bit his lip and thought some more. "You said that lyrium affects you like that too?"

She nodded. "Yes, it increases my power considerably. I really have to clamp down on the doorway to the Fade otherwise... I'm not exactly sure what would happen."

"Doorway to the Fade?"

"Oh... I visualize a door with a very bright light behind it. The Fade is the bright light. Then I shut the door most of the way when I've got a lot of lyrium in me. I shut it all the way once... I made myself tranquil, or at least that's what Wynne called it. She was able to snap me out of it though."

"Wow, that's just... weird!" He shook his head. "And how old did you say you were?"

"Well, I was fifty-two at the time. That was nearly two years ago."

"Andraste's knickers, woman! If the Chantry got wind of you..."

She stuck out her tongue. "I'm a Grey Warden, they can't touch me. I even have a note from the Second Warden explaining my weirdness."

"Yeah... I wouldn't rely on that too much."

"I'm the Hero of Ferelden, they wouldn't dare."

"Don't count on it."

"I'm friends with Loghain, the king and queen?"

"Hmmm... I don't know. I'd just be careful. Sometimes they smite first and ask questions later." He smiled at her. "I'd hate for anything to happen to someone as refreshingly weird as you are." He paused for a moment. "So... I have to ask, I just have to. I know it probably isn't any of my business but... is Teyrn Loghain your baby's father? You seemed rather happy to see him."

She smiled broadly. "Yes, you're right." She got up from her chair and walked to the door.

He beamed at her. "So he is?"

"No, you're right, it's none of your business!" She opened the door, flashed another smile at him and left.

He smiled to himself. Maker, she's cute. Then he thought about that name he had seen tattooed above her heart: Riordan. So who was that?

He closed his eyes and sighed happily. This wasn't bad really. He had a home, freedom of sorts, good food, his very own bedroom and now he had some interesting new powers from the Joining. He thought back to the night when the Commander had explained her lack of hair in her nether region. "Use your imagination," she said. So he did exactly that.

Oghren

"So, Oghren! Welcome to the Grey Wardens." Lucy slapped him congenially on the shoulder. "You probably pretty much know everything about us, don't you?"

"Yup. I can sense darkspawn, hard liquor and horny women now."

Lucy snorted. "Well, darkspawn anyway."

"I thought Riordan could sense you."

"Grey Wardens can sometimes sense one another, it takes training. I'll try to teach you later."

"Okay then, horny men and women," he said.

"Um... right. If you can sense liquor then you must've had that skill before. What else do you know?"

"We have, heh, a lot of stamina." He snickered obscenely and made a thrusting motion with his pelvis.

"Er, yes. Our strength and stamina is improved, which makes us especially good combatants."

"Heh... and good in the sack too. When do we get to march in a parade? I want to see women throwing their panties at me."

Lucy rolled her eyes. "I'm beginning to question your motivation for joining, Oghren."

"What? I like killing darkspawn too."

"Well, good. You know about the archdemon thing – Warden who kills it dies and all. Except me..."

"Yeah, sure, but we're fresh out of archdemons so I'm not too concerned." His stomach emitted a tremendous growl. "Hey... that must be that legendary Grey Warden appetite kicking in."

Lucy nodded. "Right, you'd best go to the kitchen and eat something."

"You don't have to tell me twice!"

"But first... there's one small matter I'd like to discuss with you." She pulled him back from the door. "I need to count on your discretion. There are a lot of people who might be very interested in finding out about things that happened during the Blight in order to discredit me."

"Well, sure. I won't tell anyone you're not from this world. You already got me to swear an oath on that way back when."

"Also... I need your discretion about other... personal matters."

Oghren scratched his beard. "Like what? Whether the rug matches the curtains? What sort of soap you prefer to use?"

"Hm... about my personal relationships with the others in our travels and in Denerim."

"Commander, you know subtlety doesn't work on me... best just come out with it, girl."

"Oh, for Maker's sake... who I slept with! Must I spell everything out?"

Oghren laughed. "Ah naw, I just wanted to hear you say it. Don't worry, my lips are sealed. Rabid nugs couldn't drag it out of me."

She frowned and shook her head. "I'm just concerned you might get a little intoxicated and those rabid nugs might get to those lips of yours."

"Never happen! Berserker's honor." He spat on his hand and held it out.

Lucy looked at his spittle imbued hand for a moment and then shook it gingerly. "Okay, I'm trusting you, Oghren! Now get to the kitchen and get some grub."

"Aye-aye ser!"

Lucy watched him go. "Maker, help me," she muttered.

Nathaniel

Lucy held her first audience with her vassals. The other Wardens were invited to attend. Nathaniel watched her closely. She kept Varel close to her and he was constantly whispering in her ear. She had no idea what she was doing. It puzzled him. Elissa had surely seen her parents do exactly this sort of thing from the time she was a very young child. He knew that her father was grooming her to run the teyrnir; surely at her age she would have a good grasp of the protocols, but she was clearly fumbling.

He stood off to one side, content to sip at a glass of the wine that was being served. It was an excellent vintage from 12 Dragon, some from the Vigil's own vineyard. Anders and Oghren were swilling it down. He grimaced and shook his head at them. He couldn't believe the odious dwarf had been one of the Blight companions. It was a wonder such a motley group had managed to kill something as powerful as an archdemon.

In the week since he'd been recruited he'd begun to hear the stories he missed while he was in the Free Marches. Lucy wasn't just the slayer of the archdemon, she had slain some other dragon as well, crowned a king in Orzammar, recruited the large armies required to save Denerim, and she had prevented a civil war. There were other rumors as well, particularly salacious ones about her and Teyrn Loghain. He'd missed seeing him while he was imprisoned, but the staff said that Loghain had been here for the birth of her child.

That sounded more like the Elissa he'd known. She was ever ambitious; short of marrying the king it made sense she'd set her cap for the other Teyrn. But the child... that didn't fit. Surely Loghain would have married her if it was his. He had caught a glimpse or two of the babe. It had black hair like Loghain's. It was conceivable.

He was so lost in his speculations about Elissa that he didn't see the woman approach him.

"It is puzzling, isn't it?" Bann Esmerelle murmured to him. "She seems nothing like I remember. That girl was politically cunning and carried herself like a queen. She was her father's right hand when it came to running the teyrn. Perhaps the stories were overblown, but now she seems..."

"Barely competent?" Nathaniel said.

Esmerelle snickered nastily. "I dare say, I couldn't have said it better." Esmerelle took her eyes off the fumbling Cousland girl and looked at Nathaniel. "I hear you've become a Grey Warden yourself. You surprise me. I wouldn't have thought after what she did to your father..."

"It wasn't a choice," he said tersely.

"Conscription? Oh my... perhaps she's bolder than I give her credit for."

He snorted into his wine glass and took another sip.

"You know your father and I were quite close. I'm sure he would have wanted me to look out for your interests, Nathaniel. While I don't think the Wardens is the right place for you, there's nothing I can do about it just yet, but perhaps in time..."

He looked at her, wondering what she was prattling on about.

"I think we might be able to help each other out," she continued. "Perhaps you can tell me what she's up to and I can elevate your position here."

Nathaniel raised an eye and looked at her appraisingly.

"She does look like she could use the help of someone that knows what he's doing. Someone she could trust, confide in..." the Bann trailed off. "Someone like you, my dear Nathaniel."

She wanted him to spy on her, provide her with information for whatever she was planning. It was an interesting thought. "Perhaps."

Esmerelle pressed something into his hand. "I know your father would have wanted you to have this. Think about what I've said, Nate." She smiled at him and walked off to talk to someone else.

Nathaniel looked at what she had given him. It was his father's signet ring. The one he'd always seen on his father's finger. Where did she get this?

"Don't touch that." A hand clenched his and pried his little fingers open. His father looked down on him, a scowl on his face. "This ring was handed down the Howe line from King Calenhad to me. Someday it will belong to your brother. This is no toy."

The memory came back so suddenly and unexpectedly he nearly dropped the ring, instead he stared at it. Thomas, the heir apparent, was dead. Father was dead. Delilah was gone, probably dead. Who else was there to claim this ring? It was his by rights, as was the Arling. He stuffed the ring into his pocket and stuffed the memory away too. Father had always preferred Thomas, the drunkard. There was irony in that. Now he was the heir, or should be. The child Father never approved of, whom he had sent away. Perhaps father, wherever he was, would finally approve of him.

Lucy had moved out of his sight but he heard her voice speaking quietly to a noble, Ser Tamra, the petite blonde. He moved closer but stayed behind a pillar.

"Some of the nobles here seek to end your dominion over them," Tamra told her.

"Hm. You're certain of this?" Lucy asked.

"I wish I was less certain, ser. I've intercepted some missives. They are cryptic things. Any individual message is unintelligible, but put together they form a pattern. They mean to end you before you can begin. A deadly coalition."

"Well, that's disturbing, if not altogether surprising. Do you have any idea of why?"

"Some of the nobles were very fond of Arl Howe. He was very good to those who were loyal and followed him unquestioningly. They know they won't fare so well under you and, if their past deeds come to light, they might fare poorly, indeed, if someone had a mind to see justice done."

"Really? Well... could you bring me these missives?" Lucy asked.

"Given a few days, I can retrieve them. I would've brought them tonight but I didn't know if warning you would be wise. I have much to lose and precious little to gain."

"If you fear for your life, you could stay here with us until this is resolved," Lucy offered.

"No, that's not necessary. We will meet again soon."

Nathaniel pressed his back further against the pillar to avoid being seen by Tamra when she passed.

Interesting, Nathaniel thought. Perhaps this was what Bann Esmerelle was hinting at. They mean to kill her. He thought of how he felt about it and found himself strangely sympathetic. She simply had no clue as to what she was doing; still, he nursed a molten nugget of hatred for her. All four wheels of her carriage were going to come off and it would be entertaining to watch the wreck.

"She's quite something, isn't she?"

Anders' voice startled him. He jumped and spun around to see the congenial mage behind him. He wondered how long he'd been there, long enough to see him eavesdropping? He collected himself. "Do you believe her story?"

Anders nodded slowly, a strange smile on his lips. "Yes. She's definitely not from around here. Why? Don't you?"

Nathaniel shrugged. "I knew her, Elissa. She's definitely different, but it could have been the trauma of the Blight. Maybe she was hit on the head one time too many. Perhaps she's just insane."

The mage shook his head. "No, that's not it. She's not from here."

Nathaniel snorted. "Oh, come on, how can you tell?"

Anders grabbed his wrist and sent a pulse of healing magic into him. "Everyone feels a certain way when I touch them with my magic... except her. There's something completely different. She tries to avoid letting mages touch her because often we can tell there's something off."

"Then Elissa Cousland really was possessed by... her? How do you know it isn't a demon?"

"Well, I've never heard of a demon being so human-like, have you? She doesn't feel like a creature from the Fade. You'd have to be a mage and go through your harrowing to understand. We actually have to fight a demon."

Nathaniel sipped from his glass and watched her talking to the nobles.

"She looks rather fetching in that gown, don't you think?" Anders looked as if he were trying to mentally peel it off her. "Hard to believe she had a baby a handful of days ago."

"Hm. I suppose so." Was the mage smitten with her? "Rumor has it the father is Teyrn Loghain, what have you heard?" Perhaps he could coax some details from the mage.

Anders shrugged. "She won't say. They..." His voice dwindled off. "Ah, I see Oghren has found something a little more amusing to drink. Let's go join him."

Nathaniel cursed. Anders sounded like he might have had some inside information and thought better about saying anything. He followed Anders over to where Oghren was standing with a decanter of some sort of amber liquid. Perhaps a little more drink could lubricate his lips. He joined the dwarf and the mage in lifting a glass to their attractive, young commander.

~o~o~o~

Notes: My thanks for all the reviews! Wow, feels amazing to get 24 review on my first chapter. You guys rock! Overall the comments I got on the perspective changes were positive, so I think I'll stick with that. Fortunately Biff keeps my perspective straight. Every now and then I'll get the wrong voice during one of my changes.

I have to thank Arsinoe in particular for pointing out that Lucy having a bastard would be a terrible stain on the Cousland name. It provided some fertile thoughts, so to speak, for future drama. Lucy is pretty oblivious about such things. She'd really hate feeling like she was pressured into something by nonsensical societal norms, or some such. Maybe she thinks she can change such customs.

My thanks to my reviewers, to Zevgirl for her feedback and especially to Biff McLaughlin who beta-reads so well.