Meanwhile, as Dipper and Mabel begin the walk home, Stan and Soos are planning their remodeling project. "Okay Soos, what do you want the new Mystery Shack to look like?" Stan asked him, spreading out an empty blueprint on the kitchen table.

"Well, I think I want it to look like a place that people want to go to! Kind of like Disney World!" Now that Soos had an idea, he was eager to begin. "Maybe we could put a ferris wheel here, a roller coaster there," he paced around the room with his hands out, as though he could already see it. "And maybe right there….yes! There we put the mouse head!"

"Soos, we've got enough mice in the Shack already." Stan had a different image of what the Shack should look like. If only he had enough money….

Stan envisioned himself standing in a living room completely made out of dollar bills.

"Mr. Pines, I think we should probably do something about the bathrooms first. Customers have been complaining." Stan was jerked out of his fantasy and immediately annoyed.

"They're not even supposed to see the bathrooms! There's perfectly good Porta-Potties out there for them!" Stan hated the idea of strangers rubbing their butts all over his fancy engraved toilet seats. "Have you been letting them use the downstairs bathroom?"

"Actually, Wendy has. She keeps saying something about how 'not even Soos would use one of those Porta-Potties', which I find funny because I actually kind of enjoy Porta-Potties-"

Stan paced. "We'll make a checklist." He ripped a piece of paper off of the notebook Soos was holding. "Number one," he said, drawing a small box. "Bathrooms. We'll make them less gross and more, um, I don't know, appealing? But not for the customers, for me and the squirts."

"Where will I go?" Soos inquired.

"You, my dear friend, can have your very own private Porta-Pottie with a scenic view!" Stan told the large handyman. "It even has a name!"

"Ooh, that sounds fancy," Soos said, clapping. "What's its name?"

"Its name is: The tree behind the Dumpster!"

"Interesting. Is it foreign?"

"Uh, sure."

"And what about Wendy?" Soos was a bit concerned for the well-being of his redheaded co-worker.

"Well, Wendy will get to use the downstairs bathroom, but that's only because she's a woman."

Soos was confused. "She is? I once saw her eat an entire pork chop in less than thirty seconds-"

"Anyway," Stan hurriedly cut him off. "Next order of business: the carpet in this place!"

Soos scratched his head. "What's wrong with the carpet?"

"Seriously? Just look at it!" Stan gestured at the scraggly, stained, mustard - yellow shag carpeting in the living room. "Do you even know how many times this has been vomited on?" Soos opened his mouth and raised his finger. "Don't answer that," Stan quickly said.

"Okay, so let's get some nice, new, soft carpet!" Soos said excitedly. "In a nice color. Like blue. Or maybe fuschia!"

Stan waved his hand dismissively. "No."

"But why not? It's fun to say! Fyoo-sha!"

"We're not redoing the carpet some girly, pinky color!" Stan told him.

Soos was confused again. "Well, do you have any ideas, Mr. Pines?"

Stan thought, and found himself envisioning himself standing on a gigantic, green rug that looked identical to a huge, fringed, dollar bill, large enough to hide all of his arrest warrants and the money he saved by committing massive tax fraud.

"We're getting a money carpet!" he announced. Stan looked at his checklist. "Next: The Mystery Sign on the roof! That "S" has been down for a long time, and I'm afraid people are going to think it's called the 'Mystery Hack'! And all that glitter we've used to attract tourists keeps coming off in the rain." Stan rubbed his chin. "How did that even fall? I had it nailed up there pretty secure."

Dipper and Mabel amble into the kitchen. "Hey guys," Dipper waves, the grabs a Pitt Cola from the fridge.

"Hey squirts," Stan grins. "How was your morning of free food?"

Mabel immediately started bouncing. "It was AMAZING!" she yelled. "I flirted with tons of boys, but I finally found MY boy! And now I have a DATE tonight!"

"Woah, go Mabel!" Soos gave Mabel a high five.

"Yeah, well I was tricked into going to the diner with Mabel so she could flirt with boys!" Dipper told Stan indignantly. Then, remembering how the morning had turned out after he had abandoned Mabel to hang out with Wendy, he revised his outburst. "Well, I guess it could have been worse," he told them.

"Well, good for you two," Stan told them, then he and Soos left the kitchen, arguing about what their remodeling project should consist of.

Dipper and Mabel began to prepare their lunch. Dipper grabbed the jar of peanut butter out of the pantry and studied the nutrition facts and expiration date, while Mabel stood by the fridge, debating between pink or purple jelly.

When their sandwiches were finally ready, they sat together at the table and ate them. Dipper spotted something shiny hiding beneath a large glob of (pink) jelly in Mabel's sandwhich.

"Is that ... glitter?" Dipper asked, pointing to his sister's sandwich.

"Yup!" Mabel shouted. "Do you want some, Dip?" she asked, holding out a saltshaker that she had filled with pink sparkles.

"Uh, I'm good." Dipper had once eaten a hamburger prepared by his sister, and his poop had been glittery for a week. "I have this thing about not eating food that will make everything inside me sparkly."

"Suit yourself!" Mabel sprinkled more of her glittery topping onto her sandwich and took a gigantic bite. Dipper cringed and added more peanut butter to his sandwich.

/

After their lunch, Dipper and Mabel were in their attic room, enjoying the sunshine filtering in through the triangle shaped window. Dipper was sprawled on the floor next to the giant chess piece, and Mabel was putting up posters of the latest hot boy bands. Dipper had insisted on hanging his poster of girly Icelandic pop sensation "Baba" on her side of the room, so she hung all of hers around it.

Dipper was paging through journal number three - there were still a few parts that he had not had time to look through yet.

It was peaceful in the small, sunlit room. Mabel was cuddling Waddles while drooling over "Sev'ral Times" (she had accepted that they were clones by now), and Dipper was flipping pages and occasionally making a "ooh" sound. It stayed that way until Dipper suddenly sat bolt upright and gave a very unmanly squeal.

"Mabel!" he cried. "We have to go see this!"

"What'd you find, bro-bro?" Mabel hopped down from her bed and scurried over to where Dipper was quivering with excitement.

He pointed to the page he was looking at. "Mabel," he repeated. His finger shook. "Mabel, this anomaly is incredible!"

"Just tell me what it is already!" Ordinarily, Mabel would be getting a little impatient with her brother's blabbering, but she was in an extremely good mood today, since she had found Doug.

"This tree! Its leaves produce a chemical that makes the air around it smell disturbingly like 'a Porta-Pottie that was just used by a troll!'"

"So in other, less sciency words…" Mabel spoke softly.

"This tree farts!" Dipper exclaimed. "We have to go and grab some of these leaves and stick them in Stan's pillowcase or something!"

"Great glittery gazelles! Where is this mystical stinky tree of wonder?" Mabel asked, her eyes shining with excitement.

Dipper studied the journal page. "The tree grows at the bottom of the hill fifty steps southwest from where I found this journal! If we leave now, grab some leaves, then head back, we'll be back an hour before dinner!"

Mabel stuck her fist in the air. "Let's grab some stinky tree leaves!" she cried. Waddles snorted in agreement.

"Wait," Dipper halted his sister's bouncing. "We should probably grab a couple of Soos's gas masks before we go. We don't want to pass out or anything.

The twins crept downstairs to Soos's break room. They opened the door and found the portly handyman sitting on the couch, indulging in a salami sandwich. "Hey dudes," Soos greeted them before stuffing another bite into his large mouth. "What's happening?"

"Soos, we need to borrow your gas masks," Dipper told him.

"Sure." Soos got up and grabbed two long-snouted masks from a shelf. "What do you guys need them for?"

"Um," Dipper looked at Mabel. He had not planned on having to tell anybody of their endeavor.

Luckily, Mabel jumped to the rescue. "Stan is making us clean the Porta-Potties, and he doesn't want us to, like, die of stench or anything."

"Oh, sure dudes. Good luck."

The twins grabbed the masks and made their way through the rest of the shack and into the woods.