I'll speak empty words,
things I don't mean,
in order to keep
how I feel unseen.
I'll laugh hollowly,
pretend I don't care,
to keep myself
from standing on thin air.
But you should know
with that truth-seeking mind
that what I say
isn't how I feel inside.
I reach for your hand
but she's holding it,
I pick up my heart
but the pieces won't fit.
"Oi, Haibara," Conan said. "What're we going to do if you can't find a cure?"
Ai turned to look at him. She was in the middle of developing a new experimental cure, one that would hopefully last at least a week. He was lying on the couch, arm covering his eyes, and he seemed so tired.
It was starting to get to him, she knew. He had told her about Ran crying the other night. She didn't say anything.
She picked up the pill with one hand, and filled a glass with water with the other. What if this one didn't work, or the next?
Ai had considered it before. Would it be so awful? She had friends now, and people who loved her. She had Professor Agasa, and the Detective Boys, and Kudo-kun. She had a home, somewhere she could be safe, a place to return to. Sometimes she even thought that staying this way forever would be ideal.
Maybe then Conan could move on, maybe he could forget about Ran, maybe, maybe, maybe...
She realized that the water was starting to spill over the rim, so she turned off the tap and turned back to the detective.
He was sitting up now, and she handed him the pill and water.
"Do you really not have enough faith in me? Of course I'll find a cure."
Something completely out of character for her to say, but he wasn't exactly acting normal himself.
He grinned, and swallowed.
A minute later, she was alone, as Shinichi looked for Ran.