(Author's Note: I want to thank my mom for giving me the idea for this one. You go, mom. I hope you all enjoy this episode! XD)

Episode #13 – Doctor

Loki woke up at about noon on Saturday, and he came out of my room like a zombie. He had red circles around his eyes and nose, and he dragged his feet across the floor. I was in the middle of stirring pancake batter.

"Loki, are you okay?" I asked. "You look like the Kool-Aid guy just shook you around like a rag doll."

"I do not understand that Midgardian reference, but to answer your question, I feel terrible. I am still exhausted for some strange reason, and I cannot breathe through my nostrils. Also, my esophagus feels as if I swallowed a ball of fire." I left my bowl of batter on the counter and walked up to Loki, looking closely at him and concluding that he was sick.

"That sounds like the flu," I said. "It is flu season." Loki coughed and crashed on my couch.

"I want it to stop," he said into a pillow. "Do you have any Midgardian remedies?"

"Well honestly, not for the flu, and I'm not so sure about giving you Earth medicine. With you being from Asgard, I don't know how you'll react to it. How about I take you to the doctor? That would be the safest thing."

"I do not have the energy to ask you what a doctor is, so if you believe they can heal me just take me there," Loki said. I helped him stand up and grabbed my coat as we walked through the door.

"You know what; I bet it's from those fruit snacks that I told you not to eat off of the floor in the lobby."

"I regret nothing." I chuckled, and buckled him in the passenger seat. He fell asleep on the way there.

…

When we finally arrived, Loki made a disgusted face when we entered the building.

"It smells like death in here!" he exclaimed.

"Shh!" I said. "Loki, there are some very sick people here; you can't be rude!"

"Well excuse me if these are the worst healing chambers I have ever seen." I led him to the front desk and checked him in. The lady handed me the paperwork and we sat down in the waiting room.

"Okay you have no medical history whatsoever, so I'm just going to list your symptoms. You said your throat hurt, your nose was clogged, and you were tired?"

"Yes, and my head feels like it will explode. Also, I would not be surprised if I began retching right in this seat."

"Yep, this really sounds like the flu to me. Okay, now we just have to wait until your name is called." Loki didn't like waiting, so I let him watch Wrestlemania on my iPhone. I watched Oprah on the waiting room television.

About half an hour later, a nurse came out and read off her clipboard:

"…Loki? Did I say that right?" I took my earbuds out of Loki's ears, and he looked at me sleepily.

"That's you," I said. "Let's go."

We followed the nurse to Exam Room 4. I told Loki to sit on the big table.

"Why does it have paper on it?" he asked.

"So it doesn't spread germs," I replied.

"And a piece of paper is going to help?" I smirked at him.

"I am going to take your temperature and blood pressure," said the nurse. I pleaded for Loki not to freak out in my head. The nurse commanded Loki to open his mouth and when he did, she shoved the thermometer in. He was shocked to say the least, but I gave him a harsh look and he didn't do anything. He just scowled at me and left the thermometer in. When it beeped, the nurse took it out and looked at it. Loki smacked his tongue, trying to get the thermometer's taste out of his mouth.

"Hm. You have a fever of 101 degrees. That is not good. Okay, hold out your arm." Loki did as he was told and the nurse wrapped the Velcro around his arm and began pressing the air capsule. Loki suddenly looked at his arm in alarm.

"Ow! This is squeezing me!" he said. He started to fling his arm around violently. "Get it off!"

"Sir, you have to sit still," said the nurse. "Have you not had your blood pressure taken before?"

"No!" Loki said. "I command you to release me!" The nurse took off the Velcro and then took out her stethoscope. Loki shirked away.

"What is that?" he asked.

"It's just a stethoscope Loki. Relax," I said. The nurse put her hands inside Loki's shirt, alarming him, but he didn't move. She pressed the stethoscope to his chest and he jumped.

"That's cold!"

Luckily the nurse closed her eyes while she listened to his heart, because the coldness of the stethoscope caused Loki to turn his Jotun blue. When she was done, she grabbed her clipboard and wrote something down.

"The doctor will be in soon." She left.

"I despise that woman," said Loki. "That was most uncomfortable."

"Try to behave," I said.

"I'm trying Amelia, but I feel like dog excrement and I am not exactly in the best mood right now. I want to kill everyone in this building except for you." He lied flat on the table. "When I take this planet under my control, these places will be the first to go."

"I know it's uncomfortable Loki, but really it helps you. People need doctors. Without them, most of us would be dead." Loki just sniffled.

When the doctor entered, he smiled at Loki and I and looked down at his clipboard.

"You seem to have contracted the Influenza A virus," he said. "But the season is starting; that's very common. However, the nurse noticed some highly irregularities in your heartbeat and blood pressure, so we may need to run some tests to make sure this is not stemming from anything serious."

There was no way I could explain to the doctor that Loki was from another planet, so he would have to endure these tests. The doctor handed Loki a cup.

"Urinate in this plastic cup, bring it back to me, and then we will take your blood." Loki looked up at the doctor with horror.

"Whoa," he said. "…You want me to urinate in this…give it to you, and then you are going to steal my life fluids? What kind of trickery is this?!" I stood up.

"Loki come on, I'm going to help you." I turned to the doctor. "He's never done this before. We'll bring it back in a moment." I left the exam room and took Loki to the bathroom in the hall. I locked the door behind us.

"What kind of sick process is this?!" he exclaimed.

"I know it doesn't make sense, but you have to do it. Just pee in the cup and we'll take it to the doctor." Loki raised an eyebrow at me.

"I cannot get past the fact that he wants my urine! Are you sure this man is not…"

"No Loki, he's just a doctor! Now pee in the cup!"

"Fine! But don't watch." I looked away and Loki tried to pee in the cup, cursing a few times.

"Are you done?" I asked.

"Yes," he said grumpily. I turned back around.

"Oh my God Loki, you got pee all over the wall!"

"Do you know how hard it is to get everything in this tiny container?!" I sighed and helped him clean it up. We both washed our hands and reentered Exam Room 4. Loki handed the cup to the doctor.

"Okay, now we need to take your blood. Please follow me to Exam Room 7." I didn't know if I should stay or go, so I just stayed in Exam 4 while Loki followed the doctor to Exam 7. That was a mistake.

After a moment I heard shrieking and crashing. I stuck my head out the door and saw Loki running down the hall, bleeding profusely from his arm. Shoot! I immediately followed him.

"Loki stop!" I yelled once I caught up with him.

"Amelia I'm leaving!" he said, and he ran all the way outside to where we parked.

"Loki, do you realize what you've done?!"

"They were stealing my blood! I need that! I'm sorry Amelia, but this is where I draw the line!" He sat in the passenger seat, blood pouring out of his arm. I got in the driver's seat and took off my jacket, handing it to him to stop the bleeding. I sighed, and began driving home. I felt awful for all the trouble Loki caused, but there wasn't much I could do. I was only half responsible for him. Loki fell asleep on the way home too, and when I parked in the apartment garage, I looked over at him, sleeping soundly. I smiled.

"You're funny, you know that?" I said. Despite the trouble he caused everywhere we went, it was worth it. He was adorable.