Chapter 8

She drove slowly through the suburbs, mind racing so quickly she could barely pinpoint a single thought passing through it. She barely got any sleep after Sarah caught her talking to Cosima in the middle of the night. The twins had sat up virtually the rest of the night/morning until it was time for Beth to get to work.

Surprisingly, after the initial explanation Sarah didn't have many questions. Both the women found comfort in sitting up with each other though. They passed most of the hours in silence or brief spurts of mundane conversation. The uncertainty had been palpable in the air, neither knowing what to do next or how to react to the entire situation. Although Beth had been dealing with it for months now and had essentially become the group's leader, she still had no bloody clue what she was doing half the time.

She parked her car on the side of the road, a conspicuous enough distance away from her destination. Drawing out a long sigh, Beth shut the car off and swung herself out of the vehicle. Her footfall on the cement was the only sound on the dark street. She took comfort in listening to the sound, she always had actually. It helped remind her that she was still alive.

Beth quietly slipped through the back gate of the suburban home. She didn't even flinch when the automatic emergency lights flicked on at her movement, too used to them at this point to be effected. She knocked softly on the door, not even knowing why since the lights pretty much alerted everyone that someone was outside.

The door opened moments later and Beth stared at her identical across from her. Alison gave her a kind smile and opened the door wider. "Hello, Beth. It's nice to see you."

"Yeah hey, Ali. How are you?" Beth replied easily and crossed the threshold into the home.

"I'm well, thank you," Alison responded politely and took a stiff seat on the couch next to her.

Beth smiled and did the same. She glanced around the room and noted that as always, it was spotless. "Cosima on her way?"

"She should be," Alison nodded. "But we both know she's always late so what can we expect."

"Right," Beth laughed softly, knowing how truthful the observation was. She felt her phone vibrate in her pocket but ignored it. Chances are it was Sarah anyway. Her sister claimed she was going to Felix's to get drunk while she dealt with meeting up with Alison and Cosima.

She hadn't exactly been pleased when Sarah announced her plans, considering her sister was just coming off a drug addiction. It didn't seem like the smartest move to be partying with their foster brother whose lifestyle wasn't exactly free of drugs. She didn't protest too much though, knowing Sarah needed at least one night of heavy boozing to cope with the new found information of her cloneage.

If she looked at her phone now and saw anything less than pleasing, she may not even be able to get through her entire meeting. Her concern for Sarah would likely take over very quickly and she'd hightail it to Felix's and end up getting sloshed with her siblings to cope as well.

"How's work going?" Alison's voice interrupted her thoughts.

"Um, good. I actually got put on active duty again last week, so," she trailed off with a shrug. Despite knowing Alison Hendrix for nearly half a year, it was still odd for Beth to carry on a conversation with her. They were usually all business in general, but Cosima helped to always chill things out.

Alison and Beth just didn't possess the personalities that were capable of being chill about having clones. They only ever interacted with each other to pass along any relevant information. Otherwise, Alison preferred to live a separate life with her family. Beth understood it of course, knowing all too well what it was like to have people you love that you needed to protect at all costs. It was hard on her though, felt like she was dealing with all the bullshit alone most of the time. Cosima was in another country and too busy with her schooling to offer help a lot of the time.

"That's great, Beth," Alison offered a congratulatory smile. "I assume that means things will be getting busier for you again then?"

"Yeah, probably. No worries though, I'll still have time to get any information we need on the side."

"Good. That's good," Alison nodded more to herself than anything. A soft rapping on the door had her springing up in seconds and swinging it open to allow Cosima into the home.

The dreadlocked scientist immediately locked eyes with Beth and smiled widely in greeting. "Hey! How are you guys?"

"Not bad," Beth shrugged in response and Alison just smiled at the newly arrived woman.

"Dude, so sorry about the late night call. I totally spaced on a hotel reservation before I left, was kinda in a bind when I landed."

"Don't worry about it," Beth shook off the apology. "Sorry I couldn't help you out."

Cosima waved her hand noncommittally, letting the other woman know it wasn't a big deal. Cosima quickly took a seat on the couch opposite Beth and Alison, promptly pulling out her laptop.

"Alright, what have you got so far on the German's samples?" Beth questioned immediately, figuring there was no use dancing around with pleasantries any longer.

Cosima shrugged indifferently, a look of frustration cropping up on her face. "Not much more than last time I talk to you guys. We've been trying to sequence her DNA but it's not going great."

"We?" Alison interrupted in confusion.

"Yeah. Me and Scott, he works in the lab with me. He's totally clueless about what he's working on though, no worries there," she smiled assuredly. "Anyway though, I've been getting him to code through the sequences, looking for all kinds of things that could've caused the German's illness. So far nothing conclusive has come back so I'm starting to think it's an autoimmune issue."

"Which means?" Beth probed hesitantly.

"Most autoimmune diseases are genetic. Which means we're all at risk for developing the same thing," Cosima explained gently. "I've started taking my own samples and comparing them to the German's to see if maybe two separate sources will help turn something back."

"You've got to be joking!" Alison exclaimed, only keeping her voice down slightly. "I have a family to take care of, Cosima. I can't be dealing with some mysterious illness!"

"I know, Alison," Cosima tried to calm her down with a soothing voice. "I'm working as fast as I can on this, alright?"

"How would looking at your DNA help? If we're all genetically identical then you and the German will have identical sequences, no?"

"That's true. But she was sick and I'm not. I'm thinking there could be some sort of mutation in her sequence that I don't have because I'm healthy. If we can identify that, then it'll be easier to figure out what's going on with this disease, where it's originating, and how we can fight it."

"Right," Beth nodded in understanding. "Well just keep looking then and hopefully something will go our way soon."

"What about you, Beth. Have you found anything more about who might be behind this whole thing?"

Beth shrugged and ran an exhausted hand through her hair. "Not really. I've been really busy dealing with other shit. I haven't had the time to dig anymore."

Cosima nodded silently and tilted her head as she took in Beth's stiff form. Alison was sitting absentmindedly next to her still, her mind clearly nowhere near focused on the meeting at hand any longer. Beth rolled her eyes inwardly at her counterparts and waited for Cosima to finish her blatant observing.

"Are you sure you're alright, Beth?" Cosima tried to ask gently after several minutes.

"I'm fine, Cosima."

"Yeah, sure. It's just that you look completely exhausted and I know with that shooting-"

"Stay out of it, Cosima," Beth warned. "I probably look exhausted because you woke me up in the middle of the night for a place to crash. You focus on your biology side and I'll focus on my part, okay?"

"Yeah dude, sorry. Didn't mean to upset you."

Beth nodded tiredly and stood from the couch. Alison seemed to snap out of her haze at the motion and looked up to Beth in surprise. "We're done?"

"Yeah Ali, we're done. I'll call you guys if I find anything else," she said and shrugged her jacket back on. Checking her pockets to make sure her phones and keys were still present, she offered an uncomfortable smile to the women and headed out the door without another word.

She unlocked her car from across the street and slid into in relief. As soon as the door was closed behind she sat in the darkness, head leaning back against the headrest in complete exhaustion. Everything about having to experience that meeting at this point was horrendously painful for her. She was in so much fucking deeper than Cosima or Alison could ever comprehend. It was horrible for her to have sit through their theorizing and sometimes panic, acting like she was just as clueless as they were about the entire thing. Sarah was the only one with all the information and she planned on keeping it that way. She could work with Alison and Cosima, but trusting them with all the deeper shit was too dangerous, she had no idea who she could really trust anymore.

The Beth Childs from six months ago had disappeared and been replaced by a new, carbon copy of her former self. She was a shell of a person now, completely empty inside. She could act like everything was fien and go through the motions of a normal life, but shit was so far from fine. She operated now to gain truth and knowledge over what the hell her existence was for. Not to mention she was handed the role of protector without ever asking for it. Being a clone had become her entire life – controlling every move she made now.

She wished so badly she could separate her clone drama from her real life like Cosima and Alison seemed to. It was impossible now with everything she had already discovered though. Cloning had infiltrated every goddamn aspect of her life and there's nothing she could do to stop it.

"Oi, don't go, sister!" Felix shouted as Sarah moved through his flat, searching for her discarded leather jacket.

"I got to, idiot. Beth'll flip her shit if I don't show up before sunrise," she rolled her eyes, Felix knew it was the truth so she didn't know why he even bothered to protest.

"Right. Well she needs to lighten up a bit. All work and no play make for a boring Elizabeth."

"Eh!" Sarah scolded. "Give her a break, yeah? Without her being as stable as she is, me and you'd probably be dead by now."

"You for sure," Felix agreed with a disinterested shrug. He took another swig of amber liquid from his tumbler and smiled widely at his sister. "Just one more drink?"

Sarah laughed and shook her head. "I can't, Fee. She's probably already wonderin' where I am."

"This all could've been avoided if she just came in the first place you know."

"She had shit to do tonight."

"Like what?" Felix laughed. "Paul's outta town. Who else does she hang out with these days?"

"I dunno, alright? She said she was busy, I didn't ask questions," Sarah said in aggravation and Felix seemed to sense it was time to shut up. Sarah was going to defend her sister to him in light of all the shit she'd just found out. Beth was in deep and she was protecting not only Sarah but Felix as well by keeping her at a distance with it all. She couldn't stand to listen to him making fun of her right now.

She dropped a light kiss on Felix's cheek and smiled in goodbye. Sarah was gone without a backwards glance and making her way out to the street. Beth's apartment was a fair walk away but she knew some shortcuts through the city that could make it go by faster. She didn't mind the distance anyway, actually having come to enjoy the solitude of walking through a city late at night. Most people would be scared of all the types of people who came out when darkness blanketed, but Sarah could often be considered one of the people all others thought to fear. A street smart grifter that ought not to be fucked with.

She walked along the sidewalk, hands tucked firmly in the pockets of her jacket. The night air was crisp, the threat of snow falling increasing every day. If there was one thing she couldn't bloody stand, it was the cold and the Canadian winters. She gritted her teeth to keep the chill at bay, clenching her fists tightly in a will to keep warm. The alcohol in her system was wearing off faster than she anticipated, causing the heat loss to be even more noticeable with every step. She upped her pace slightly to get home even faster.

The alleyways she cut through were nearly pitch black but if they could get her to her destination in half the time, she didn't mind having to adjust her vision. With only a few blocks to go, Sarah cut through her last alley and sighed victoriously knowing she was only a few minutes away from a warm house to curl up in.

So busy anticipating the warmth to be had, Sarah didn't notice a figure emerge from the shadows of the alley. She continued to walk as her unknown companion stalked behind her, picking up a large piece of abandoned lumber. Half a second later Sarah was struck hard in the back with the wood and stumbled to the ground, only barely pulling her hands from their confines in time to catch herself. She still felt the stinging from the harsh gravel in her palm and cheek though. She rolled over quickly in shock, looking up to see what in the hell had just happened.

A hooded figure loomed over her, knife in hand. Sarah's eyes widened in fear as the figure sprung down to pin her to the gravel. She could just make out the bleached strands of curly hair peeking out under the hood and she shuddered.

"Good riddance, Elizabeth Childs," the figure said menacingly, voice dripping with a heavy Eastern European accent.

Sarah's chin wobbled as she watched the knife swing back in the air, preparing for impact. Her mind seemed to process what the attacker said and shook her head in terror. "I'm not Beth!"

The attacker froze, bring the knife back down to rest against her side carefully. She pulled her hood back and Sarah nearly vomited at the sight of her own bloody face looking back at her. Albeit, this bitch screamed psychopath, still her face nonetheless.

"Who are you?" Sarah demanded, trying with all her might to keep her voice from shaking.

The clone stared down at Sarah, shaking her head. She allowed the knife to graze against Sarah's outer thigh. "Not yet, not Beth."

Sarah closed her eyes briefly. She felt around harshly on the ground and nearly cried when her hand latched onto a piece of rebar. She clenched her fist around it and brought it up as quickly as she could, impaling the clone's stomach as hard as she could.

The woman stumbled off Sarah and she wasted no time in scrambling backwards, trying to get her shaky legs to stand once again. The clone was gasping her air, gripping at the piece of metal stuck in her but never pulling it out. She turned her back to Sarah for the first time in the encounter, stumbling down the alley until she had disappeared.

Sarah choked out a half-sob and hastily picked up the knife that her clone had left behind. She took a deep breath in hopes of calming herself down and ran the rest of the way to Beth's apartment.

She unlocked the door and swung it open forcefully when she finally arrived. Slamming it shut behind her just as quickly and flipping the lock. She tossed the knife on the counter in disgust and was overcome with nausea as the events of the last five minutes started to settle in her stomach. She coughed once and threw up bile in the kitchen sink, hands gripping the counter top as though her life depended on it.

Sarah had barely finished wiping her mouth when the sound of the door unlocking had her grabbing for the abandoned blade again and turning to face the door. She steeled her features over as the door swung open but relaxed when Beth's figure appeared in the opening.

"Jesus Manning! What the hell are you doing?" Beth demanded at the sight of her sister standing with a serious knife in her hand.

"Sorry," Sarah muttered and dropped the knife. "Didn't know it was you."

"Well obviously," she scoffed and narrowed her eyes at Sarah. "What happened to your face? It's all cut up."

Sarah laughed emptily. "Yeah. I think I just met our clone killer."

"What? Who is he? Did you get a good look?"

"He's a bloody she, and she looked exactly fucking like us. All kinds of psychotic."

"Holy shit. She's one of us?"

"She came at me with this," Sarah explained, holding the knife up and passing it off the Beth. "Tried to stab me with it but I got her first with a piece of rebar."

"Fuck Sarah, I-"

"She thought I was you, Beth. Sounded like she had every intention of killin' you tonight," Sarah said softly, the fear creeping into her voice easily.

Beth gulped, nodding as she examined the knife in her hand. "This is a fucking mess."

"Yeah," Sarah scoffed in angry agreement. "How'd your meetin' go?"

Beth shook her head. "Let's not talk about it right now."

She looked up at her twin sister, the fear in her eyes an exact mirror to Sarah's. She placed the knife gently on the counter and moved to stand in front of her sister. She wrapped Sarah in a tight hug and tried to let out all her anxiety over the situation in a deep breath. "I'm not gonna let anything happen to us."

"Promise?" Sarah asked vulnerably.

Beth closed her eyes at the waver in Sarah's voice, letting a small tear squeeze out. She cleared her throat slightly to keep her voice strong when she spoke. "I promise."