Chapter 15 – Consolation with a Twist

Katia approached the Pensieve. She noticed some empty bottles on the floor around it. There must be plenty of memories swirling inside.

It wasn't the first time she'd viewed memories this way, but nevertheless she took a deep breath before she put her head inside.

Katia found herself in a clearing. There were some people dressed in robes and she suspected that they were wizards and witches. They were talking with a strange accent. It was definitely English but, strangely, she couldn't recognize any of the words. There were cauldrons, very big ones actually and some ingredients in bowls laying nearby on the grass. A man whom she recognized as the Master was explaining something to a thin, petite woman.

They started putting crushed plants, some liquids from bottles and other things into cauldron. Katia watched, transfixed, as the Master sliced his wrist open and let the blood drip into the cauldron while pronouncing foreign-sounding words in a melodic voice. The woman cut a lock from his hair and added it to the bubbling mixture. There was almost no heat under the cauldron and Katia was sure that it wasn't boiling.

The substance thickened and she saw a hand rising from it. Inadvertently, she took a step back. The wizard was making complicated movements with his wand and soon purple threads burst from it, wrapping around the body as it rose from the cauldron.

They watched as a naked man stepped out, looking curiously around his surroundings. He looked weird somehow, and his eyes… they were red! It gave Katia the creeps, but before she had a chance to think about it anymore, the scene changed.

She was in the castle, in a big room where the wizards and witches from the previous memory were discussing something. The Master entered, bringing some people dressed in white tunics. She could see that they were being questioned. She could also tell that the answers weren't satisfactory as she saw disapproving expressions on many faces.

Suddenly, she was in the forest again. She saw a huge mess of magic folk killing men and women in tunics, using mostly knives or their bare hands instead of the killing curse. Only a few flashes of green were visible, burning into her eyes, and Katia cringed at the association of her memory with the Avada Kedavra. If not for Wulfrick, she would be a mental wreck, but her father had done everything to make the memory an unpleasant moment in the past, so it didn't affect her as badly as it should have.

She closed her eyes, but she saw the memory to its end anyway. The experiment started again and new people emerged from cauldrons.

Katia could understand some parts of the notes. It meant that it was the second phase of experiment and it was also described as a failure. By now she was a sobbing wreck, wishing these memories would just go away. She was still fidgety after the unpleasant experience with the mirror and the blood she had seen. The compassion she felt along with the helplessness now, combined with her own memories of hiding under the bed, made her cry openly. When she was sure she couldn't take it anymore, the scenery changed again.

She was in the same room, but still in the Pensieve. The Master sent the boy who had accompanied him away. The servant, as she guessed the boy was, pushed two coin-like ornaments on the wall and the 'lift' appeared. The Master worked on some incantations and she was sure that he discovered something he would like to repeat, as he preserved this memory. Luckily for her, it was also her chance to escape from this horrible chamber.

Katia collapsed on the floor, breathing hard. She needed to get out of here. One minute longer and she would go insane, she was sure she would! She could barely see the coins, even with the bright lumos provided by her wand. She couldn't stop crying and her distress didn't diminish when she shut the black door as she got out.

Katia ran through the hallways, the images she had just seen floating in her head. It was so—so inhuman to do such a thing to another living being! And she couldn't save them, couldn't even close her eyes to block the images from her view. The killing curse, so much blood… She was sure that the images were seared into her memory.

She found herself unable to take deeper breaths as she ran; she felt as if something was pressing against her chest. She wanted to meet someone alive, someone who would talk to her and distract her from what she had seen.

She was in a familiar part of the dungeons now, though rather deserted as there was nothing as useful as a classroom or common room. Just some locked rooms. She spotted Professor Snape not very far from her, his black robes billowing as he marched in her direction. Or the direction where she'd come from, she didn't know. She'd taken a different path going back and had been lost until now.

Katia quickened her pace and in all her distress hugged her Professor, desperate to touch someone alive.

Severus was heading towards his second storage room, where he kept his most vile ingredients. He located it in the unused part of dungeons in case if something exploded or leaked. If was safer this way, as there was almost no chance that some student might come here. He heard someone panting and soon Miss Ivanov appeared from around the corner.

She was a complete mess with filthy robes, straggly hair and bewildered expression. He fought an urge to laugh; she was looking as though some dragon had chased her all the way.

His urge to laugh immediately disappeared as she flung herself at him, practically hugging him.

He noticed that she was trembling.

He stiffened and mustered one of his famous glares.

"Kindly remove yourself from me, Miss Ivanov," he said coldly; and to his relief she obeyed, staring at him wide-eyed.

"I-I'm sorry s-sir," she stuttered and Severus thought that it was so unlike her to be in a state like this. Ivanov was usually very composed, especially for her age. He couldn't pin her behaviour on the incident from Valentine's Day. She had been looking better when he'd seen her in the Great Hall; she'd looked better even yesterday when he had walked her to her new room.

"Do you care to explain the reason for your strange behaviour, Miss Ivanov?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I got lost…and I couldn't find my way back, sir," she said quietly and added "sorry" after a moment.

She avoided his eyes, but even if she hadn't, Severus knew that she was lying through her teeth. He felt irritation building up inside of him. Something had happened and she, knowing how important it could be, having been in a hospital wing with petrified students, seeing them was stupid enough to cover her reckless wanderings from him. Did she believe that he was silly enough to take her words as truth?

"I'll ask again, what happened?" he said slowly and coldly. She should be intimidated enough to hesitate.

"I said, that I was lost, sir," she said clenching her jaw and looking at the floor. So, she was fighting to conceal her lie. He would need to get it out of her a harder way. He couldn't take the risk of letting her go with vital information about attacks in the school.

"Look at me," he demanded, and she obeyed. However, he could see defiance in her eyes. Severus caught her arm firmly.

Legillimens, he thought and invaded her mind with such force that he saw her knees buckle.

Katia Ivanov, no more than five, was painting some animal on the wall. It looked like a hybrid between a dog and a cow…Filch's office and the infernal Ivanov inside, drinking something from a bottle… A few girls, all dressed like Katia, with glasses in front of them. The girl to Ivanov's right had a pregnant belly and a glass of something before her. Katia was drinking from that glass, grimacing but feeling proud and all the girls were laughing. A dark tunnel appeared and Katia was running through it, covered in some filthy substance...A thin, short girl placed a tray full of food and a glass of milk in front of Katia. He felt her anger as Ivanov shouted something in Russian and threw the milk in the girl's face. The tray followed and Katia picked a spoon and threw it at the retreating servant… There was a thin woman with a loathing expression and little Katia screamed at her and ran out of the room…Pansy Parkinson screamed as her head was pushed into a filthy toilet.

Severus felt a pressure—he was aware that the girl was trying to push him out of her head and putting a lot of force into it, too. Severus fought back as he continued rummaging through her memories.

Flash of green light, a woman with her face twisted into a frightening grimace, her hair spread wildly like a black halo on the bloodied carpet. 'Stand up now, Mummy'… A short man holding little Katia who was clinging to his neck and Igor Karkaroff standing not far away…A dark corridor and a hooded figure going through the black door…A portrait of Salazar Slytherin, dressed in the same robes… 'I can see patterns in the darkness. I want to go through that door'…Katia Ivanov opening the same door as the hooded figure.

The pressure increased as he saw a glimpse of a forest and he was aware that Ivanov's body racked with sobs. She tried to free herself from his grip but he held her tight.

Then he saw; a forest and a group of people. Some of them dressed in heavy wizarding robes, some in simple tunics. The killing curse flashed here and there and people in tunics were trying to run away. Some of them fought and those died were killed with the Avada Kedavra or by being stabbed with knives. A man, no more than twenty, ran in Katia's direction; he was entirely covered in blood, his expression horrified. Severus could feel Ivanov's fear, desperation and helplessness.

Her rising anger, which had been somewhere in the background before, increased and finally it was above any other feeling. Severus was pushed out of her mind and Ivanov's face was twisted with rage.

"How could you invade my privacy in such manner! Prostak idiot!" Shouting, Katia turned and tried to yank her arm free.

Severus should have reprimanded her for her rudeness, but instead he jerked her arm so she was facing him again. With his free hand he pointed his wand at her head. Her eyes widened, but he didn't hesitate.

"Obliviate!"

Ivanov's eyes became glassy and he used her temporary confusion to convince her that last two minutes hasn't happened.

"I understand that you were lost, Miss Ivanov, come with me. You need to calm down," he said smoothly and gently led her to his office.

Severus would be lying if he said that the things he had seen in her head weren't disturbing him. He saw glimpses of her home life and of course she was spoiled. At the same time she had seen things which children at her age shouldn't see and experience. He could understand her better, feeling the amount of anger which accompanied most of her memories. If she wasn't schooled in self-control, she would be wreaking havoc every time someone did something that wasn't to her liking.

He was concerned about the amount of pressure she had used to push him out of her mind. Of course she stood no chance against him as he was not only talented in mind magic but also experienced. However what she had done was definitely more than a mere natural gift—she knew what to do, which meant that someone had taught her. But why? And how had it been possible for her to repel him from her mind given her poor magical talent?

Severus shut the door of his office and gestured to the chair by his desk. Ivanov sat on it, lacking her usual grace, staring at nothing. He took a vial from the drawer and handed it to her.

"It will calm you," he said, but Ivanov smelled the contents instead of drinking it. Severus fought the urge to roll his eyes.

"It's a Calming Draught, not a poison," he said a little more harshly than he'd intended to. He couldn't get over her lying to his face, her rudeness when she had dared to call him an idiot, and the fact that he couldn't say a word against her now as he had invaded her mind and Obliviated her after.

The girl drank all the potion in the vial without hesitation and then looked at him. "I was just curious about the potion, sir. I trust you wouldn't do me any harm."

Ignorance is bliss, isn't it Ivanov?

"It was foolish of you to wander all alone in places when you shouldn't be," he said, changing the subject. He needed to hide the fact that he knew about the strange room she'd visited. He needed to stop being infuriated with her behaviour before he Obliviated her.

"I didn't know it was forbidden to explore the castle a little. I didn't know I was doing anything wrong, sir."

Something strange flickered in her eyes for a moment and her gaze darted away. He was wiser now; now he knew how she reacted when she was hiding something. With her nasty temper he needed to admit that she had a great deal of self control. And was able to lie far better than Potter ever did. She would have fooled him if he'd met her now, when she was back to her normal ever-polite, composed state.

Severus took a deep breath. "Miss Ivanov, I have something to say and I would like you to listen to me carefully."

Her eyes met his and she straightened in her chair as he continued. "I know it's hard for you to interact with your housemates after what has happened…lately. But I can assure you that it will only get worse with each passing day if you don't try to socialize with them. This may seem impossible for you right now, but you will be living there in the near future and you can't be on your own."

She nodded. "I… haven't thought about it Professor, but yes. I cannot hide from them forever and my wanderings were a form of delaying the inevitable, which would be setting things back to normal." She traced her lips with her finger. "I'm not even sure if I'm scared…No, I think not. It's more of an uneasy feeling of being frightened, knowing that they talk about me behind my back. And I'm not used to dealing with situations like this." She looked at him again and he was sure that something was wrong with her.

Ivanov rubbed her left arm and he cringed inwardly. Of course her arm was probably mottled in a shade of violet where his fingers had made contact with her flesh. He'd forgotten to do something about it.

"Now go to the sink and do something to clean up your robes. They're filthy."

Severus watched the girl, trying to determine how much her emotions affected her movements. Surely she liked to hide behind her hair as she did nothing to take it off her face and never tied it back. Her movements were always as precise as everything she did; he had seen enough of it during lessons. An untrained eye would think that she was acting as if nothing had happened, but he had seen some stiffness in her back, and she watched him out of the corners of her eyes. Finally she finished, and biding him good day, left his office.

A/N: Thanks to manicrose for beta-reading this chapter. I hope you liked it :D If you found something wrong, - please let me know. I would be delighted to have a chance to improve my writing. And I love your reviews very much!